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“Pretty women wonder where my secret lies. I’m not built to suit a fashion models size, but when I start to tell them they think I’m telling lies. I say, it’s in the reach of my arms, the span of my hips, the stride of my step, the curl of my lips. I’m a woman phenomenally. Phenomenal woman that’s me.”

-Maya Angelou

Have you ever wondered why so many men of other races are attracted to or drawn to the beauty that is the black woman? Has the question ever crossed your mind, why do men of a different color stare at black women in awe? Have you ever wondered why men of other races are so fascinated with black women? Well, I have and I found the answers to these and other questions. A while ago, a friend of mine and I were talking and laughing about a slight temper tantrum a co-worker of ours was having at work. We both had a look of slight confusion on our faces before we agreed that he needed to calm down, then all of a sudden, out of the blue my friend said, “He needs to date a black woman so he can calm down!”  As I listened to his words I was shocked and somewhat taken aback by this statement because my friend is a man of Hellenic decent, and I wondered why he would say that. So of course I asked him, “Why do you think he would be calmer if he dated black women?”  He then began to tell me about his experience with dating a black woman. He started telling me that dating a black woman was an uplifting experience for him. While she was strong in sprit and dominant, she was also nurturing with sex appeal. She knew how to de-stress him after a long days work, she healed his soul with good food and company while boosting his confidence. So then I asked my friend what initially attracted him to a black woman. He enthusiastically stated curves, curves, curves and more curves! He further stated that he loves the curves of a black woman’s lips, hips, eyes, waist, etc. He even loves a black woman’s curly hair! He was also attracted to her spirit ‘faith’ and the woman she was as a whole.

During the course of our conversation my friend expressed to me that his black queen made him feel like a MAN during their relationship. He said that she allowed him to be the man by simply allowing him to make plans, and by allowing him to be chivalrous. He also told me that she knew how to be a lady that a man could compliment while still being Hot. I then asked my friend did she intimidate him, and he said no. I also asked him did she ever ‘check’ him, or put him in his place, and how did it make him feel. He said she did put him in his place, and it felt good because it allowed him to refocus on what he should be doing, and get back to where he was supposed to be when he got off track. I asked him these questions because so often I hear that black women are intimidating to men, or we have too much attitude to deal with so on and so on, but from this Hellenic man’s perspective the stronger the woman she was the better. As our conversation started to end, I asked my friend what he would tell black men about black women. He said that he would tell them that black women are not just black women. We are African-American women, which means there is a lot of culture within who we are, and we are the ones who can and will continue the race with our strength, our pride and or heritage. Before our conversation came to an end, I asked my friend these final questions; what advice would you give to black women about men, and would you date a black woman again? The advice he would give to black women about men is to let a man be a man. And the final question, would he date another black woman? What do you think…? Black coffee, no sugar no cream, men of all cultures do indeed love black women.

Liz Lampkin is the Author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin.

 

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