Are You The Problem? 8 Thoughts That Are Keeping You Single

August 17th, 2012 - By Julia Austin
"Woman thinking"

justkhaotic.com

Here’s a pill that’s hard to swallow: the way things are in your love life is exactly the way you like them to be. Sure, you say you’re not happy being single. And maybe you’re not happy, but you’re comfortable. You’re not facing any of your fears or leaving your comfort zone—two things you would have to do to find a relationship. And, the typical human being tends to prefer what they know—even if they don’t necessarily like it—than the unknown, even if that may come with more pleasure. Here are 8 things and thoughts that may be limiting your chances at a soul connection.

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  • Linda

    How does one do the “ladder”? Did you mean to type “latter” instead? Maybe you should compare those two words in your thesaurus … or even a dictionary! Or hire a new proofreader.

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  • leilani

    is that d wades baby muffa?

  • Nope

    ”
    “There are no good men out there”

    Or the question that never gets answered, why aren’t you getting or keeping the good men that are out there….?

  • Honeybee30

    It is sad to say I fit in to 3 to 4 thought catergories because of bad relationships, rejection, and expectations from men who were not worth it. That’s why I am still single. It is a reality for me.

  • DUMBEACHPLEASE

    BEING SINGLE IS A PRIVILEDGE, NOT A PROBLEM. ANYONE CAN BAG A LOSER. SINGLE MAN= BACHELOR SINGLE WOMAN= GENIUS ( NOT MY OWN QUOTE)

  • mischa34

    Ok dang! I admit…I still like sleeping in the bed by myself, being able to fart whenever, and throwing on old torn up t-shirts and sweats to chill around the house (by myself!), but I still don’t want to be single…I don’t think my expectations are too high, but I do want someone I could consider a friend and a boyfriend/husband…I don’t think I’ve gotten comfortable just yet cause I think my “singledom” often, but I do want someone I feel comfortable with from the jumpstart…and no that doesn’t including farting or looking a mess at home!…but somebody I can curse around or who gets my stale humor and the fact that I sometimes think deeply.

    • nene

      I’m the same way I like to sleep alone and do some things by myself but I still don’t want to be alone forever.

  • Ms_Sunshine9898

    lol well i gotta meet someone first before any of these can apply to me!

  • Nope

    I also think a lot of women tend to have a Greatest Hits approach to the men they’re involved with or want to be involved with. They combine their best experiences with men into one packaged arrangement and that becomes the bar for every individual encounter. A regular album is meant to be appreciated and interpreted on its own merits , a Greatest Hits album is designed for immediate gratification with little effort. As brilliant as any individual Prince album is, it’s unfair and unrealistic to compare it to one of his greatest hits albums.

    • DUMBBEACHPLEASE

      I ONLY BUY GREATEST HITS CDS. ANYTHING SUBPAR OR INADEQUATE MIGHT GET PLAYED ONCE OR TWICE BUT IS ULTIMATELY GETTING TRASHED.

    • Bauthor

      So I take it your a regular album who is disgruntled because the greatest hits are moving more units. So you insult the buyers. Did you ever think your album just isn’t that good?

      • Nope

        I’m married…..

  • Cha Cha

    I know that I fit into a couple of these categories… I’ve been rejected, in terribly bad relationships, dated someone who ended up stalking me, and just recently had a guy tell me “no wonder you’re single”… because I told him I didn’t want to hear about his d*ck size… I’ve just kinda given up… Soon as a guy approaches me, my mind already thinks… what kinda bs is he gonna give me… and that’s sad… I’m trying to change my way of thinking, but sometimes, it’s just easier to live in your comfort zone…

    • amberfierce

      @ Cha Cha I’m having the same issues….

    • thatonegirl

      I feel your pain. The struggle is most definitely real(sigh).

    • bauthor

      Dido…. you are sooo not alone girl.

    • adrienne michelle

      i feel ya pain girlie

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steady-Brixx/100002906872638 Steady Brixx

      Oh wow. I have the same complex…

  • disqus_WfmNqv9gsC

    oh my gosh , unfortunately i fit most of these categories plus i have never been in a relationship so i am simply terrified…..im 21 btw and thats really sad

    • whoisbsquared

      I’m the same way, ur not alone.

      • NiceNasty

        Co-sign so that makes 3. But i’m a year older then you which makes it even more sad :(

  • http://www.facebook.com/tilly.ramirez Tilly Elon Ramirez-Hughes

    Lawd, if #1 isn’t me, i don’t know what is! But i knew this already and i have been willing to make the necessary changes. It’s a process but it’s worth it in the end

  • Nope

    The point about a woman should love her own life and not unfairly or unrealistically expect a man to fill all of her voids is a good one. That man doesn’t exist. A lot of women will have the 75 to 80 percent of the type of man they say they want, but ruin it or end it over someone that has that 20 to 25 percent, and now they’re back to drowning their sorrows in a bowl of ice cream. I’ve also found that the more a woman wants, even if just emotionally, the less she actually has to offer.

  • MLS2698

    I thought the lady in the recycled pic didn’t mind being alone.

  • ditzy

    well said

  • Kimster

    “Well, he treated the bartender kind of strangely, and he was texting a lot…” If by ‘strangely’ you mean rudely or flirtatiously on a first date, that’s not psychoanalyzing. That’s a big red flag right along with texting a lot on the first date. That’s just plain rude.

  • bluekissess

    What can I say this article is truthful.I need to change some things