The Realities Of Living With An Ex After A Breakup

May 8, 2017  |  
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young lazy male sleeping on the couch and making a mess

It’s not ideal, it’s usually a nightmare, and most people will feel bad for you but sometimes it has to happen: sometimes you have to live with an ex after a breakup. If you moved to a new city together, both got jobs you love there but have no friends yet and no money for a hotel, you may just be stuck living together for a while after calling it quits. It seems like there should be a shelter for couples going through breakups, right? Because living under the same roof as an ex can be a toxic situation. If you’ve done it before, then you know these things to be true. If you’re one of the rare and confused individuals who has the option to stop living with an ex but thinks it’s a smart idea to stay put, then let this be a warning to you. Here are the realities of living with an ex after a breakup.

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No more financial favors

Your ex won’t pay the landlord the full rent and let you pay him your half in a week. The financial favors will be over once you’re broken up. If you clearly use more electricity than he does because you work from home and he doesn’t, he’s going to make you pay a larger part of the electricity bill.

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What’s his isn’t yours anymore

No, you can’t dip into his milk or his laundry detergent. That will seriously annoy him. It will also make you a little sad, because you’ll remember when you used to share everything.






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Chore grace periods are over

If you have a rule that you vacuum every week by Friday then you better be ready to vacuum every week by Friday. Your ex isn’t going to let you wait until Sunday anymore. It’s not like you’re busy doing stuff with him.






Your friends will bug him

Your ex won’t say it’s okay anymore for you and your friends to dominate the living room until 1 am with your wine and your takeout. He wants them out.







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Your friends don’t want to come over

Don’t worry too much about the last point because your friends don’t want to come over! The vibe is weird at your place!








You have to wait for the bathroom

You used to just go in there while he was showering and pee. But now, you’re just roommates, so you need to wait until your ex is done in the bathroom to use it. It’s pretty inconvenient.







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You have to split up the fridge

You can’t just toss your groceries wherever you want anymore. You’ll divide up shelf space and drawers and you better think twice before encroaching on his side.







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Tradition days will be weird

If you used to always go to the Farmer’s Market together on Sunday morning then Sunday mornings will be weird for a while. You’ll both be wondering if you’re still going to go together.







Dates? Yeah right

No, you can’t bring your date over! It doesn’t matter how cool your ex says he is with it: your date feels very uncomfortable. Even telling dates you live with your ex may scare them off.







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You’ll sneak out in hot clothes

You don’t even really want your ex to know when you’re going on dates. When you’re all dolled up in your date clothes, you’ll sneak out the front door when your ex isn’t looking.






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Self-pleasure is so weird

You’re in your room, now doing to yourself things that the person in the other room used to do to you. It almost seems like a waste to just have your ex over there.

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Territory battles

If this place belonged to one of your before the other one moved in, they will now feel that you are living in their space. Even if you moved in together, but one person found the place, they will feel territorial over it.






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When parents visit

Your parents and his parents will probably still visit you there. Now that is one awkward encounter. Your parents don’t quite know how to treat him and he doesn’t know if he still needs to make an effort with them.







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The moving out talk

You can’t live together forever, but nobody wants to have the, “So who is moving out and when?” talk. Oddly enough, when you do have it, you’ll be a little sad.







He may try to have sex with you

He is a man who, ya know, has needs. His hormones may overpower his brain one night and he may just end up knocking on your door, wondering if you’d like to “Help each other out.” It will be a tough moment.

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