8 Ways Men Talk Themselves Out Of Sex

February 18, 2015  |  
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Men, if nobody has told you yet it’s time you learn: one word, one action, one glance can take sex off the table for the night. Women can be turned on easily with the right actions, but they can also quickly be turned off. Here are 8 ways you talk yourselves out of sex. Ladies, are we right or are we right?

All you talk about is work

It’s fine if you need to get a few work stresses off your chest—you should be able to talk to your partner about anything after all. But keep it brief.


She feels like your stress ball

If you spend the entire night talking about things you’re worried about at work, or talking about how down you are on yourself over your career’s progression, your partner will feel weird about having sex with you. She’ll feel like you’re just using her to relieve stress, and nobody wants to feel they’re being used in any way when it comes to sex.

You talk sh*t about people

It’s easy to get caught up in talking about all the wrong life decisions your friends are making and how pretentious your coworkers are and what a loser your cousin is. But make a conscious effort not to talk sh*t if you want to have sex later.

She feels a part of the sh*t talking

Your partner probably doesn’t condone you talking badly about people in your life, and if she has sex with you after you’ve done that for two hours, she feels like she’s a part of the sh*t talking. Try to keep it positive. It’s so much more attractive to give compliments than criticism.

You ask her to do everything for you

Hey, we get it: sometimes you need a little help. Sometimes you have to take work home, you’re starving, and you don’t have time to feed yourself so you ask your girlfriend to make you something. Sometimes you realize you didn’t put your clothes in the dryer before leaving for work, and ask your partner to do it for you. However…

She feels like a little wifey

Just know that if your girlfriend has been making you dinner and doing your laundry and writing your thank you notes all day, that sets up a weird power dynamic, whether you mean for it to or not. She might not want to give you one more thing at the end of that day, and that extends to sex.

You tease her for gross quirks

It’s great that you’re comfortable with her bad gas or that her toenail clippings get everywhere. But don’t bring this stuff up within a few hours before sex.

She won’t feel sexy

It’s very hard for her to believe you’re focusing on how hot she is when you just reminded her thirty minutes ago about the time she stunk up the bathroom.


You barely interact

If you’ve been dating for a while, you won’t feel like talking for hours every night. But if you want to have sex, you can’t just play video games the entire evening while she reads a book and expect her to get excited in bed.

Women need mental stimulation

Women need to feel that they’ve connected with you at least a little emotionally and mentally before having sex. Even if you just share funny stories from your day for ten minutes—just give her something to feel like she isn’t just your sex toy for the night.

You complain a lot

Yes, the restaurant lost your reservation and you had to wait an hour and they got your order wrong. Yes the cab driver took the wrong route and you paid $15 more than you should have. But if you want to get laid later, you may need to bite your tongue about it.

Negativity is a turn off

If your girlfriend has heard you be negative all night, it’s just an awkward transition to suddenly be like, “So anyways, want to get naked?” Try to at least pretend to be happy within the hours leading up to sex.

You eat until you’re stuffed

If you just need to gorge sometimes, go for it! And gorging with your partner at your favorite bottomless ribs restaurant can be a blast. But just know…

She’s familiar with your digestive tract

And she doesn’t want you to burp in her mouth during sex, or fart during 69ing.


You make her eat until she’s stuffed

It’s sweet that you want her to feel comfortable in her body and you encourage her to eat and enjoy herself. It’s fun that you’re feeding her beer and pudding all night. That being said…


She’s familiar with her own digestive tract!

Bouncing around, being slightly upside down and being flipped over are just not a good idea after a big meal.

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