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Can you still have a great time with a poor guy? Absolutely. It’s the person who makes a day great, not the activity. But, society runs on money and you can’t avoid some of these awkward things that will happen when you’re dating a guy much poorer than yourself.
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When people talk about restaurants…
When people try to tell you two about an amazing date spot, you already know he can’t afford to take you there.
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He feels bad when someone else pays for you
You feel bad mentioning when a friend or even your parents took you out to lunch, because it reminds him that he can’t do that.
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You can’t suggest long drives
If you want to take a drive somewhere for the day, you know he’s calculating the gas costs in his head. But if you offer to drive, he feels like less of a man.
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He has a lot of time
If he is poor, he is probably only partially employed—if employed at all. So you sort of feel like he’s always waiting for you to get off work to hang out.
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Your parents are worried about you
As if it’s not enough that you’re worried about your guy’s future, now your parents are worried about yours because your guy is poor.
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You don’t feel safe in his neighborhood
If he had to find super cheap rent, he probably doesn’t live in a neighborhood where you feel safe walking to your car at night.
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You feel guilty around your birthday/anniversary
It’s hard to just enjoy a gift from him without thinking about the dent it put in his already tiny bank account.
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You go date-less to weddings
You have to attend a lot of weddings without him because he can’t afford the hotel room or the plane ticket there or even a tuxedo.
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He can’t go on double dates
He can’t afford the type of restaurants your friends want to go to on double dates.
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Or you pay for yourself on double dates
The only way you two can go on a double date with your friend and her boyfriend is if you pay for your part, which is awkward because your friend’s boyfriend is paying for her.
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You feel awkward offering to pay
It might not be read as just a nice gesture—as it would be if the guy could afford to pay—but rather as a pity gesture.
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He’s not in a position of power
He is probably subservient to somebody at his job, i.e., he probably has a boss, if not many bosses and superiors. And it’s hard for him to have you see him be bossed around.
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He gets solicitation calls
Often when you’re hanging out he gets phone calls from student loan collectors or credit card companies about his outstanding balance.
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He feels bad buying things for himself
He feels he can’t buy himself a nice shirt because you’ll wonder why he didn’t save that money to take you out.
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You feel bad buying things for yourself
You feel bad buying yourself nice things because he feels bad he couldn’t buy it for you, and that he couldn’t even afford to buy himself something that nice.
