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Parenting is the hardest job that any of us will ever have. But we still have to do better than this. If you identify with any of the parents on this list, you might just be bad at your job.

You Chose This Name

Just in case you didn’t catch it, that’s Knowledge MarLexus Townsend.

Everyone Knows What Your Priorities Are

And everyone else is surprised to find out that you even have a kid.

If Your Pregnancy Started This Way

We’re going to go ahead and assume that this poor, simple baby is pregnant already.

Image Source: Instagram.com

You And His Father Can’t Agree On Anything

Not even on who picks up the baby when he falls in the street.

You’re This Lazy

Is this lazy or creative? It looks so ridiculous we’re having trouble deciding.

You Feed Your Baby Steroids

So he can hurry up and get big enough to do to the heavy chores.

You Don’t Believe In Gun Control

Is she wearing a tiny bullet proof vest? They know that doesn’t make this any better, right?

You Treat Your Dogs Better Than Your Kids

They get gourmet Alpo while the kids are eating chicken nuggets.

Image Source: Twitter.com

You’re In Too Much of A Hurry for Them to Grow Up

If you can make an infant look this done, you’ve clearly done something wrong.

Image Source: Twitter.com

This Is How You Put the Baby to Sleep

And you still feel OK about Tweeting the pictures to all of your friends.

Image Source: Instagram.com

You Have Zero Shame

Like this woman who Facebooked about being sad that she had to give her son up to foster care — so she could do a better job of getting turned up on the weekends.

You Keep Scaring That Baby

For your own personal amusement.

This Is How You Play with the Kids

If this game isn’t already called “Irresponsible Parenting,” it should be.

You Can’t Do Better Than A Monkey

That should really be the bare minimum for human parenting.

You’ve Purchased This Game

Does this game come with real drugs? We feel like we have to ask.