How To Make Your House A Home When Living With Your Man
It’s been said that you don’t really know someone until you live with them. Once you’ve been in a relationship with a man for some time it’s not uncommon for the next step to be moving in together, but living together is an entirely new beast for couples to tackle and sometimes, this beast can end a relationship. Here are 14 tips for making your house into a home with your man once you two decide to live together.
Make sure you’re both completely on board
Deciding to move in together is a big deal for all couples. Before you two make the big move, make sure that both of you are absolutely, positively, without a doubt ready to live together. If you’re ready but your man isn’t there quite yet, it’s best to wait until he’s completely sure that he’s prepared for this next step. Living together isn’t easy.
Talk about it
Before making the big leap, make sure that the two of you thoroughly talk about everything. Each of you has to know what you expect while living together as well as your wants and needs as a person and as a couple. Don’t just make the decision to live together arbitrarily. Talk it through beforehand.
Co-habitating with your boyfriend requires openness and flexibility. It’s impossible for one of you to get everything you want. Instead, you’ll need to find happy mediums and compromise in order to accommodate both of your needs and expectations.
Have a plan
Moving and living together doesn’t happen overnight. You two need to work together to create a plan of how things are going to work. Set a date and work from there to decide what you’ll do about your current lease, roommates, etc.
Plan for alone time
Living together means that more likely than not, you’ll be seeing each other a lot more. While this may seem nice in your mind, it can also be frustrating and can put a lot of stress on the relationship. Since you’ll be around each other on a daily basis, be sure to plan for some alone time. Go out with the girls or head to the mall for some me time.
Communicate even more
Communication is important in a relationship, but it becomes even more important when you share the same four walls with your partner. Without proper communication, you two will easily end up annoying and frustrating each other to no end. Talk about your pet peeves with each other as well as any habits that may cause problems. You’ll want to talk about chores and expectations around the house as well.
Pick your battles
Little arguments and fights are bound to happen in a relationship, but they’re going to be even more common once you live with your man. It’s much different to argue over the phone than it is to argue in person, so pick your battles wisely. If your man left dishes on the kitchen counter, no matter how frustrating it may be, your best bet is to probably put it in the sink and move on instead starting a big argument about it.
Don’t have hidden expectations
Some women decide to live with their boyfriends in hopes of being able to move to the next step even quicker. If you’re looking to live together with your man for underlying reasons you’re making a big mistake. Don’t live with your partner in hopes of starting a family quicker or in hopes of getting a ring. If these are your expectations, express them.
Talk about money
Living together isn’t as simple as packing and unpacking boxes. Before living together, make sure that you talk about money. Though the money talk is never exciting or fun, it’s crucial that it’s done. You’ll want to discuss how bills will be paid while also making a budget for household expenses, groceries, and entertainment. Will bills be split? Will your man pay the rent while you pay for the rest of the bills? Know these answers ahead of time.
When you live together, there are all sorts of jobs and tasks that will need to be done around the house. Who’s in charge of laundry? Who does the dishes? Who takes care of the dog? Who cleans the bathroom? Knowing what jobs will need to be done and assigning them is a great way of divvying up chores and avoiding arguments.
If you’re used to living by yourself, it’s likely that you’ve only taken yourself into consideration. In your own home, it’s okay to leave your clothes everywhere and to have makeup in every bathroom. However, when you live together with your man, it’s important that you’re considerate of him and his space. Your bathroom is his bathroom and the TV is just as much his as it is yours.
Just like packing and unpacking doesn’t happen overnight, settling in together doesn’t happen overnight either. Both of you will need to be patient with each other as you adjust to an entirely new living situation. Perfect won’t happen in a few days so be patient and provide plenty of time for getting situated and comfortable.
Remember you’re a couple
Living together often causes a lot of couples to lose track and focus of their relationship. Sometimes you can become a little too comfortable and couples may find that they’re acting more like roommates than lovers. To avoid this, go out on dates. Christen your home in the best way possible. Have date nights and show plenty of affection. Otherwise, the relationship can become stale quite quickly.
Consider writing an agreement
Sometimes it’s best to plan for the worst. In the event that the relationship were to go south and end, it’s nice to have some sort of written agreement and documentation that determines what happens if you two break up. This agreement should determine who gets what, who moves out, and so on. While this won’t be the most fun task, it protects both of you in the event of a worst case scenario.