I’m sure you’ve all heard the old adage that “a good man is hard to find.” And with the way our men are being swallowed by the prison system and dropping like flies, I couldn’t agree more. So when you do come across a good one, the smart thing to do is to put those clanks on ‘em—lock him down and make it so he doesn’t want to be set free. How? Check out these nine tips that will make him feel appreciated and will help you keep your old man by your side.
Take Care of Home
To some of you, it may sound 1950-ish, but making sure everything is in order around your home is one of the key elements to keeping a good man. Nothing screams wife material more than a woman who feeds her man when he’s hungry, can pay a few bills (if necessary), takes care of the kids—if you have any—and keeps the house tidy (even if you don’t live together, keeping your own apartment clean will show him that you have the ability to maintain a home).
A good man should walk through his door and feel comfortable and at ease. So it’s your job to provide that for him, that is, if you want to keep him.
Let Him Be the Boss
We all know that behind closed doors, women run ish. But don’t ever make him feel like he’s less than a man, especially in public. That’s a big no-no. Follow his lead, let him call the shots, but once you get back home, well, you know what’s up.
Men pride themselves on their accomplishments, money, and their ability to provide. So anything that correlates to the three, you better believe he holds it dear. Whether it’s dreams of building his own auto shop, or getting a promotion at the job, make sure that you encourage him to do his best, assist him in attaining his goals, and support him in everything he chooses to do.
Be a Lady in the Streets, But a Freak in the Sheets
No sane man wants a woman who gets loud, wild and crazy every time they’re in a public setting, but when locks are turned and doors close, that’s a different story. If you want to keep your man, know when it’s time to have some class and when it’s time to break the chains and let loose.
Give Him Space
Every once in a while, he may want to spend the night out with his boys or invest in a little alone time without any interruptions or distractions. Respect that. Just like us, men like to be by themselves sometimes. Don’t take it personally. Give him his space and when he’s ready, he’ll come right back. Besides, it’s a great opportunity for you to do all the things you want that he might not be into. Kick it with the girls, catch up on your shows–just chill.
Take Care of Yourself
Always make sure your nails are done, hair is on point and that you’re dressed to kill. Hit up the gym if you want to lose a few pounds, even if your body is already tight and in tip-top shape. Remember, we live in a world where women outnumber our male counterparts, so you should never give your man a reason to be embarrassed about showing you off or taking you out. Of course, there will come a time in your relationship where you will comfortably look how you look in front of him, even if that means you’re rocking rollers and sweats. But we all know that nothing is sexier than a woman who holds her man down, and looks good doing it.
Try Not to Nag, At Least Not Too Much
I know it’s hard ladies, but if and when he messes up—especially if it’s something small—don’t go on and on and on and on and on and…on. Make your point and let it go. Otherwise, your motor-mouth can lead to frequent late nights at the job and ample opportunity for vultures—lonely, desperate women—to swoop down on your man.
After you’ve been with someone for a while, things can become routine, and well, pretty darn boring. So it’s nice to throw a few curve balls in there every so often. You know, switch it up, keep things spicy. Whether it’s trying something new in the bedroom or planning a surprise dinner on a fancy yacht, or doing something you don’t necessarily like but know he loves, make sure you maintain his interest by keeping him on his toes.
Have Your Ish Together
Only insecure men go after women with no morals, goals, ambition or confidence. But if you’ve hooked a real one, I’m sure he’d prefer you to have your life on track so that he can avoid unnecessary headaches and drama.
Before you can be happy with someone else, you first have to get your life in order and be happy with yourself. Real talk.