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If you and your partner do not plan on having children, and you’re finally going to tell your parents that, let me tell you something: they probably won’t take it well. I recently told my mother I probably won’t have children (I’m reaching my fertility prime and am clearly nowhere near having kids, so the topic came up). At first, she played it cool. She said she understood and respected my decision. She said I shouldn’t do anything I don’t want to do. And then, over the following two days, her real feelings came out. She started making small comments and asking leading questions. She was clearly not okay with the idea of me not having children. She tried every trick in the book to change my mind. You can’t blame your parents for wanting grandkids—they just love you so much that they want, well, more of you. Here is what your parents say when you tell them you don’t want kids.
Did you hate your childhood?
They wonder if you just hated your childhood, and assume all childhood is bad. They press and pry, asking what was so wrong with your life as a little kid that makes you not want to give life to a new child?
