All Articles Tagged "rude"
Random Kendra Anecdote: In high school I had a continuous flirtation with this guy since our freshman year. It was pretty harmless, but it was definitely something to look forward to whenever we had a class together. Our senior year he approached me on a Monday after I had a massive shopping spree that weekend and said: “Is that a new outfit? You look really nice in it.” I was beaming, but for some reason instead of saying thank you, I said: “It cost [this much].” His smile slowly faded and he gave me the side eye and was like: “Oookay…” Feeling his uneasiness I proceeded to name each and every new item that I had one and tell him the monetary value of it while internally I was yelling at myself “Shut up! Stop talking! For the love of God, go sit down somewhere!!”
Honestly, I STILL, to this day, do not understand why I did it, but I do know that that was the end of our harmless flirting.
I said all that to say this: We live in a day and age where you’re supposed to be vocal about your accomplishments, however, there are a few things that if you seem to want to broadcast about yourself is going to turn people off. So, learn from my poor example and let’s examine these things.
So you think you’re a very well-mannered person? Well, I hate to break it to you, but if you ever do any of these things on this list, you may not be as well-mannered as you think. In fact, you might actually be rude sometimes. Have a look and see if you’re guilty of any of these common habits that people sometimes do without realizing it’s rude.
One of the most annoying things about people eating is when they chew like they haven’t eaten in months. It’s both annoying to hear and distracting to look at. Relax loud chewers; the food isn’t going anymore, so no need to chomp it down like it’s trying to run away from your face.
- You’re irrational as hell: A bully truly wouldn’t be a bully if they didn’t run around making the least amount of sense possible. They might tell you, “Don’t talk about me behind my back!” but will run around and talk about you to someone else like you are dirt in the road. The concept of “treat people how you want to be treated” doesn’t apply to them because that’s no fun. They would rather make your workday or your life a living hell by acting as though whatever small thing you may have done (but real talk, you probably didn’t do anything at all…) warrants them trashing your name to anyone who will listen.
- Confrontation is your best friend: There’s no reasoning with a grown up bully. You can’t have a real conversation with this person without them yelling at the top of their lungs, pointing their finger in your face or acting like a fight will ensue. The reality of the situation though, is that in most cases, the bully’s bark is bigger than their bite. They just want to jump in your face and think you’ll go cowering in a corner so they can have a reason to treat you badly and “keep you in line.” Intimidation is what a bully thrives off of, so instead of talking to you about what their beef is, they’d rather exchange your name for the b-word and make everyone think they’re tough.
- Your victims are always people who won’t fight back: Remember how I just said, “Intimidation is what a bully thrives off of”? Well, it’s true. As long as they feel that you fear them, they will continue to come at your head when they really need to be putting themselves in check. However, the minute you step up to them and let them know there’s just so much you’re going to take from them (or lay hands on them–but I really don’t recommend that), then they leave you be. You have to stand up for yourself and let folks know they aren’t as big and bad as they would like to be to get them to back down.
- You’re MAD insecure (and sensitive): It really doesn’t take much to set a bully off. Leave them out of a conversation, don’t invite them to a party (because they’re crazy), or spend a lot of time with their friends and they’re ready to lash out. Bullies like to be the center of attention or be in the midst of everyone’s business. When they’re not, that’s when they start to get moody. They think everyone’s talking about them (even when no one is worried about them), and when they want what you have (a man, the materialistic goods you tote around, etc.), they tend to diss you for it. As tough as a bully tries to act, sometimes they have deep-seeded issues and emotional problems that cause them to act out. But that doesn’t make their poor treatment of others right, of course.
- You try to embarrass people in public: Whether this is the co-worker who tries to blast you about your work ethic in front of others, the boss who tries to yell at you in meetings in front of everyone, or the person who critiques your outfit in front of all of your friends, bullies like to make you into a spectacle. It’s already annoying that they do it in general, but there’s something very uncool about trying to play people in front of other people. It could be that they’re trying to make other people think less of you, or in reverse, maybe they think belittling someone for their own entertainment will make them look big and bad. Whatever their reasoning, it’s dead wrong. Karma is a bad Mamma Jamma, so if this bully is you, cut it out and grow up.
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By Desire Thompson
Like the late Christopher Wallace once said: “More money, more problems.” However, he never said that with more money, your head has to get bigger and egos will spin out of control. Everyone’s favorite celeb psychiatrist, Dr. Drew Pinsky, studied over 200 celebs in 2006 using the Narcissistic Personality Inventory, which studies narcissistic tendencies. The study rates people on a 1 to 40 scale, with 40 being “extremely narcissistic.” On average, celebs scored a not-so-surprising 17.84, which is higher than the general public. While all of this may be obvious news to some, it isn’t to all. Celebs want to keep their names out there, so just know that with every Twit pic, status post and club appearance they do it isn’t for the fans…it’s for themselves. Take a look at some celebs that have let their egos get bigger than their paychecks.
The R&B singer/songwriter hit the scene in 2008 with her song “Energy,” and eventually received a great deal of mainstream appeal with her hit, “Turnin Me On.” While she was finally beginning to be known for her own music rather than the songs she penned for Ciara, Beyonce and other R&B divas, she decided to take jabs at all of those individuals in 2009 on the remix for “Turnin Me On.” Lines included things like, “Go head tell these folks how long I been writing your songs… I been putting you on… check the credits hoe!” When confronted about her comments she simply reversed all of her words, but continued to talk smack about other singers (who can forget when she refused to pose with a magazine that Bey was on the cover of?). But hey, as long as you don’t hate her cause she’s beautiful…