I always hear older people say, “If I could turn back the hands of time…” they wouldn’t have done this or they would have said that. They would’ve made sure that they had built a better foundation when they were young or taken education more seriously. Whatever the case, there’s always something from their past that they wish they would have handled differently.

When I was younger, I always wondered why they said those things. I was pretty much a happy kid with no real worries, living the life, so I had no clue why adults always seemed so regretful about their pasts. It wasn’t until I gained a few years in wisdom and experience that I realized what they were talking about. It was then that I finally understood.

My list of wishful do-overs is pretty sizeable, from my college choice to relationship decisions. Sometimes I sit and think to myself, “Man, you really messed up on that one!” Or “Moms was right when she tried to warn me about that.” But just like every other human on the planet, I understand that I’m not perfect. I’ve made mistakes and will make plenty more, but I’m now learning to live with those not-so-good choices and grow from them.
Often times, people are so consumed with “could’ve, should’ve, would’ves” that they forget to move on. You know, the ones who sit around and dwell on the past almost every day of their lives. People who always want to lecture you about how they screwed up and how they desperately wish they could change things around. What they don’t realize is everything that we do, every bad decision that we make, is meant to be a learning experience. If we don’t go through those mishaps, then we remain void of wisdom and are unable to teach those around us how to stray away from the bad choices we’ve made. When we live in the past, we remain stagnant, become depressed, and lose the potential to correct our wrongs and brighten our futures.

I’ve seen this happen with so many people. From fathers who remain absent in their children’s lives out of shame of being non-existent in the past, to mothers who regret having kids by a certain man and end up taking their frustrations out on the children. I know I’m not the only one who’s familiar with those types. Or the kind of people who are so ashamed of errors that they’ve made that they run away from any and everything that reminds them of those problems. They run and they dodge instead of facing those faults, coming to terms with them and making amends. And this is an even bigger mistake than that ones that they’re hiding from.
It isn’t always easy, but learning to live with regrets makes life much easier. We’ve all done things that we aren’t proud of no matter how big or small. But you can’t let those missteps consume you. Constantly thinking about how things could’ve been and what you should not have done will only diminish your spirit and gnaw at your mental and emotional health. Let it go. If you need to, ask for forgiveness, pray to God for strength. Change your thinking. Be a better, smarter you. And please, learn to live your life.

The Bible says that the tongue is the most unruly member of the body. Now, I don’t mean to preach to you, but you don’t have to be a Christian to know that that’s true. Catch us on the right day, at the right time and we’re bound to say something extremely reckless and out of character. There’s no need to judge, we’ve all done it, or will eventually. We checked in with our faithful Facebook followers to see if they would share those same experiences. They graciously opened up and shared their flaws and regrets. Hopefully, these admissions won’t make you feel so guilty about your own tongue slips. And most importantly after reading these words, we hope that you’re inspired to take a minute before you say something you’ll wish you hadn’t.

Te’ Michelle: “Okay, just this once…go slow.”

Sharon: “You’re gaining weight and I’m worried about your health.” He heard “you’re fat.”

blackloveandmarriage.com

Getting over a breakup is never an easy thing, especially if you were the one who was dumped. We may tell ourselves that we’re over him, that we’re better off and that he’ll never find another woman who loves him like we do – but deep down inside, we miss him. We might even want him back. These feelings fresh off a breakup are perfectly normal, and it’s okay to admit that we’re not over him just yet.

But if months and years go by and your feelings are still a little fuzzy, here are a few ways you can tell if you’re still in love with your ex…

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