14 Things You And The Boo Probably Fought About Valentine’s Day Weekend

February 18, 2013  |  
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So Valentines weekend has come and gone and you honestly wish it had never happened at all. It left you questioning your man’s feelings for you and his investment in the relationship. It’s a day on which tensions and expectations run high. There is a lot of room for disappointment, but this might make you feel better: nearly every couple argues about one or all of these things on Valentines Day.

"Couple Dining PF"

He didn’t plan enough

In general you felt his planning was done half-heartedly; he grabbed the first box of chocolates/bracelet/flowers he saw instead of shopping around, and they clearly came from a drug store. Perhaps he made no reservations at all, or if he was going to make you dinner he had yet to do the grocery shopping when you arrived at the designated time.

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He never asked what your favorite flowers were

It never comes up in casual conversation (why would it?) but for some reason, come Valentines Day, men are supposed to know what your favorite flower is. Oh—and they were supposed to have asked at least two weeks in advance. Any asking after that time mark seems sloppy and careless on their part.

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He made a reservation too late

So you have to eat dinner at 10 pm, or at somewhere not so great, or at the table by the bathroom. Poor guys: they don’t realize that the extra showy ones book up all the good spots a month in advance.

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He had plans the next morning

He planned a business meeting or hike with his buddies, for 7 am the next morning. Meaning you guys can’t stay up until 3 AM. Not that you would have anyways, but it’s the principle of the matter—apparently.

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He was checking his email

Unfortunately Hallmark holidays aren’t quite recognized on the fiscal calendar. Secretaries across the country don’t say, “Uh oh! It’s Valentines Day! I better hold off on sending this urgent email until tomorrow.” And so, your man can’t get completely invested in the lovey-dovey, light hearted mood because work is calling. Or beeping or flashing.

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You didn’t have special conversation

On any other night, you maybe exchange a few details of your day, and then you jump into planning dinner and picking out a movie. But on Valentines Day—oh no. On Valentines Day your conversation has to be made of the stuff worthy of a Barbara Walters interview. It has to look like a first date from an Indie movie. You’re suddenly supposed to want to talk about stuff that you otherwise have no inclination to discuss.

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He didn’t get you a card

Poor guys: even after the flowers, the candy and the jewelry, they always forget the card. Since they’re left brained, they don’t tend to express themselves via the written word as much as women do. Men speak through actions or things. They thought the flowers, candy and jewelry would be enough.

"Cute black guy with his arms crossed pf"

He didn’t dress up enough

Men are trained to dress for the place, not the occasion. That’s what they’ve learned from us women: to ask if a pair of pants is appropriate for the restaurant/party/bar. They don’t realize that on Valentines Day, they’re supposed to be red carpet ready, even to go to sushi.

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One of you had to work

It’s five days before Valentines Day and one of you realizes you’re on the schedule to work that evening. It’s probably your boyfriend and you’re probably mad because if he’d just asked for the time off three weeks ago…! Cut him a break. You weren’t thinking about Valentines Day three weeks ago either.

"Jealous woman pf"

Your friend’s boyfriend did a better job

Some jerk will ruin the luck for them all when he engraves his girlfriend’s favorite poem on the back of a bracelet that has been in her bracelet for generations, that he tracked down through one of those family tree websites. And then that girlfriend posts a picture of that on Facebook. And then you think, “Well wait a minute…flowers and candy are easy! Anybody can get that! My guy could have put more personal thought into this!”

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You wanted more photos

The showy couples will—as they always do, any time they simply go to the grocery store—post a full on album of Valentines Day. And then you’ll realize you and your guy didn’t take any pictures on Valentines Day. And then you’ll realize you don’t have that many at all. And THEN you’ll be wondering what that says about your relationship! Is your guy ashamed of it!? Is he trying to appear single?!

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He didn’t call until the evening

Men are task oriented; your guy was probably just focused on getting his work done as quickly as possible so that he could see you as soon as possible. But you didn’t see that kind gesture. You saw that you didn’t get a text at 12:01 am wishing you a Happy Valentines Day. Or you didn’t wake up to a note on your pillow.

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His mind was elsewhere

It’s Valentines Day and that means your guy isn’t allowed to worry about the fact that his roommate is late on rent for the fifth time, or the fact that he might have to default on his student loans, or the fact that he has a huge presentation for work in the morning. It’s VALENTINES DAY! Shouldn’t the world have stopped?

"Wine bottle pf"

He wasn’t drinking

And finally, cocktails are a big part of being “in the moment”—or at least many people feel that way. If your guy wasn’t drinking, or was keeping his intake to one or two drinks, that could have had you concerned that he was just thinking about how he’d feel in the morning for work, or that he needed to keep his head clear for any work calls that might come in that night.

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  • Most of this list is too funny. #1 to me is the only acceptable argument. If he expects to go out to a restaurant on Valentine’s Day, especially if you live in DC like i do, and he didnt make reservations, then you can forget the whole night. You will not be eating, unless its at Chipotle. Thats just real.

  • JustSayin

    This should be titled, “How I know that my man will leave my complaining whiny behind before the summer.”

  • Thanks Julia. This article had me cracking up. So funny and so true.

  • geri

    this is the dumbest list ever

  • chanela

    umm what about the other 364 days? how did he treat you? SMH

  • FB

    The title should be men can’t do anything right in women eyes no matter what!