14 Ways To Handle A Bad Date, Including How To Fix It, How To Leave Without Hard Feelings, And How To End It…Fast!
When it comes to dating, you’ll find that some dates are a hit and others are a complete miss (and mess). Even though you may get along with someone through emails and messages, you may find that in person, the two of you don’t click at all. This can easily make for an awkward date and during a bad date, you’ll want to stay calm and collected while trying not to make matters worse. If you find yourself in the position of an extremely awkward date, here are some tips to help you through it (or out of it).
Try to initiate conversation
One of the most awkward times during a date is when no one has anything to say. Those minutes that are spent in silence are completely awkward and they make for a really weird time. If a date is already headed downhill, one thing you can do is try to keep the convo going. Ask questions or talk a little about yourself, but don’t go overboard. Talk about movies, food, your interests and anything else that you both can relate to and that may spark a decent conversation. Just don’t start looking at your watch…
Don’t whip out your phone
Even if you know that the date isn’t going anywhere, the last thing you want to do is completely isolate yourself. When a date becomes awkward, don’t pull out your phone and start texting, checking Facebook, or playing a game. Even worse, don’t call your friend or a family member and start a conversation. Though it’ll probably be hard, try to keep your focus on the date.
Don’t point out the obvious
When a date is going awkwardly, you will both feel it so there is no real need to point out the obvious. This will only make the atmosphere between you two that much worse. Even if you’re dying to simply tell him how it is, don’t, because he already knows. Do your best to stop yourself from blurting out how weird the date is and if possible, give it a chance to turn around on a positive note.
Don’t lead him on
At the end of the date, the last thing you want to do is propose or accept a second date. If you’re just not into him, don’t make him think you are because not only are you setting yourself up for another bad date, you’re making him think you’re interested in some fashion. End the date on a good note and suggest just staying friends, or never seeing him again. It’s up to you.
Don’t blame yourself
If a date goes badly, you may be inclined to play the blame game and in the end start pointing the finger at yourself. It takes two to tango and with any date, it’s never just one person’s fault if things don’t go as good as you had hoped. Don’t at all feel bad about a failed date because you learn something from every experience.
Try some humor
Even on the worst of dates, having a few laughs together can make things a lot better. Lighten up a bit and talk about something funny. This isn’t the time for cheesy jokes, but instead, maybe talk about a crazy and funny experience you’ve had in the past. Laughter is the best medicine, even for an awkward date.
Make a deadline
If right off the bat you know you’re not interested in this guy, you can easily make up a deadline as to when the date ends. Instead of spending hours together, tell him that you can only stay for an hour because something important came up. A little white lie isn’t a horrible thing, but at least you gave him some of your time.
Make sure you’re not being overly critical
A date can go downhill if you’re being really critical of the guy you’re out with. If he’s not wearing his Sunday’s best or if his personality isn’t exactly what you thought it would be, you can easily start holding a grudge. Keep an open mind and make sure that you aren’t internally being way too critical of him.
Avoid being flirty with someone else
Maybe there’s a hot guy across the room or maybe your waiter is some serious eye candy. Whatever it is, save the flirting for after the date. There’s nothing worse and more embarrassing for him then seeing the girl he’s on a date with start flirting with someone else. Keep the winks and stares to yourself until the date has come to a close.
Figure out why it’s going badly
Not all dates are doomed if they start off badly. Are you nervous? Is he? If you can sense that something is wrong and it’s something that can be easily fixed, it never hurts to just start over. A bad date doesn’t have to go down the drain completely, especially if you know there is a way to turn it around.
Bring in a wing(wo)man
Guys do it, so why can’t we? If a date is going badly and you can’t deal with it on your own anymore, have your friend call you and set-up a fake emergency. Maybe something is wrong with her car and she needs your help. Whatever it is, make it believable. This will be your exit plan if you just HAVE to exit stage left.
Even though you’re on a date with this guy, if you’re not into him but you know one of your friends would like him, why not let him know? Playing matchmaker on your own date sounds weird, but it could go really well. If he’s a bit too shy for you but you know he’d mesh well with a friend of yours, try setting them up.
Try to find some common ground
Even if you guys aren’t clicking like you hoped, you are bound to have some sort of common ground, or else you wouldn’t have agreed on a date in the first place. Talk about these similarities that you two have and focus on them. This way you can at least avoid silence and your mind isn’t focused on how badly the date is going.
End the date nicely
If all else fails and you’re just really annoyed and uncomfortable with the date, you can just end it early. No matter how bad the date went, you always want to end it nicely. It’s not a good idea to just walk out or diss him. Explain the situation, end it, and go on with the rest of your day.