Childs’ Play: Reasons Why You Attract “Little Boys”

40 Comments
May 6, 2012 ‐ By Julia Austin
"Young man with lots of tattoos"

trendyblackguy.com

Do you seem to date men who just can’t get their act together? Men who, if you weren’t there packing their lunch and dropping them off, would probably skip work, or night classes or whatever their responsibilities are? It’s no coincidence: these guys look for you. But, what’s more alarming is that you look for them.

Here are a few reasons why that may be…

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  • Rose-marie Lewis

    Listen we can complain about how we always attract the same kind of guy i.e. little boys, guys that are this and that blah, blah, blah!  But if we actively KEEP GOING with these types of guys – then it’s on us too!  

  • Kimdione

    I was hoping this article was really about how to stop attracting little boys,not immature men! I’m 30 but only 5’5 & 110 lbs & my face has not changed since high school. No one out of high school ever approaches me & its frustrating.

  • Ladybug94

    If you are an older woman…lose the flashy burgundy, blue, orange hair colors.  That does not attract a professional man, it attracts the young in mind that just want to kick it.  Oh and the big gigantic tat on the legs, no ma’am.  That will not attract the professional man either.

  • Lovelydee33

    So true all of them

  • Lovelydee33

    So true all of them

  • Lovelydee33

    So true all of them

  • IllyPhilly

    You forgot some women just want to “mold” the “perfect” man so they get ‘em young and dumb. 

  • IllyPhilly

    You forgot some women just want to “mold” the “perfect” man so they get ‘em young and dumb. 

  • IllyPhilly

    You forgot some women just want to “mold” the “perfect” man so they get ‘em young and dumb. 

  • IllyPhilly

    You forgot some women just want to “mold” the “perfect” man so they get ‘em young and dumb. 

  • Rondachambers

    I live in the hood. There aren’t any big successful men. They’re all just trying to get by. And so am I . I’m not looking for a man to upgrade me. People should look for someone to grow with.

  • Rondachambers

    I live in the hood. There aren’t any big successful men. They’re all just trying to get by. And so am I . I’m not looking for a man to upgrade me. People should look for someone to grow with.

  • Rondachambers

    I live in the hood. There aren’t any big successful men. They’re all just trying to get by. And so am I . I’m not looking for a man to upgrade me. People should look for someone to grow with.

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  • Really

    This article is missing something important…if you want a man that is successful, but aren’t getting that at all obviously you don’t have an abundance of successful men wanting to get to know you. We know how it goes, usually the man approaches us. Either there is something about the way you look, act, or think that doesn’t attract a man that has it together.

    On the other hand some women get all types of men trying to get with them, but you usually have more in common with someone in the same position as you. Some of us like men that are young at heart, and as a woman we naturally like to cater so that can come with the territory. I just think these types of articles give women false hope when everyone can’t get the same type of man and vice versa. If your young not all women are blessed with being able to get a finished product, and sometimes you have to be willing to grow with someone who is worth it. If you have a lot of ambition and are with someone with none then maybe you need to start being more open to getting to know the dude with no swag, but smart. Black women can have problems with being somewhat nerdy themselves, but still wanting a man  with edge. If you dated more realistically you wouldn’t be single.

  • Really

    This article is missing something important…if you want a man that is successful, but aren’t getting that at all obviously you don’t have an abundance of successful men wanting to get to know you. We know how it goes, usually the man approaches us. Either there is something about the way you look, act, or think that doesn’t attract a man that has it together.

    On the other hand some women get all types of men trying to get with them, but you usually have more in common with someone in the same position as you. Some of us like men that are young at heart, and as a woman we naturally like to cater so that can come with the territory. I just think these types of articles give women false hope when everyone can’t get the same type of man and vice versa. If your young not all women are blessed with being able to get a finished product, and sometimes you have to be willing to grow with someone who is worth it. If you have a lot of ambition and are with someone with none then maybe you need to start being more open to getting to know the dude with no swag, but smart. Black women can have problems with being somewhat nerdy themselves, but still wanting a man  with edge. If you dated more realistically you wouldn’t be single.

  • Really

    This article is missing something important…if you want a man that is successful, but aren’t getting that at all obviously you don’t have an abundance of successful men wanting to get to know you. We know how it goes, usually the man approaches us. Either there is something about the way you look, act, or think that doesn’t attract a man that has it together.

    On the other hand some women get all types of men trying to get with them, but you usually have more in common with someone in the same position as you. Some of us like men that are young at heart, and as a woman we naturally like to cater so that can come with the territory. I just think these types of articles give women false hope when everyone can’t get the same type of man and vice versa. If your young not all women are blessed with being able to get a finished product, and sometimes you have to be willing to grow with someone who is worth it. If you have a lot of ambition and are with someone with none then maybe you need to start being more open to getting to know the dude with no swag, but smart. Black women can have problems with being somewhat nerdy themselves, but still wanting a man  with edge. If you dated more realistically you wouldn’t be single.

  • Shawn_Never_Settles

    Gotta admit I didn’t read it ——-> Could it be because you are acting like a little girl or a cougar that has run out of options (and he sees an opprtunity to be an opportunist/get benefits out of the deal?) Then you have those that will holla at whoever just to see if someone will bite (they will take anyone that will give them some or something.

  • denver

    Oh ! I was thinking something else. I’m about to be 27 and I attract white men, and little boys. I have youngens stepping to me talking about they are 17, 18, 20…….I thought MN could help me out as to why lol ? I literally attract little boys smh !

    • sash

      i 2nd that, i do too– im a small framed young woman that still get little boys in high school with their book bags and all still trying to holla —i know im baby faced but sheesh– and men my age wont really date me — because i look like i belong in high school –they’re probably thinking jailbait lol

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown man swexy ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown man swexy ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown man swexy ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown man swexy ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown man swexy ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a
        way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as
        that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to
        get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a
        man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type
        i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown
        man s e x y ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a
        way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as
        that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to
        get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a
        man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type
        i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown
        man s e x y ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a
        way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as
        that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to
        get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a
        man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type
        i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown
        man s e x y ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a
        way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as
        that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to
        get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a
        man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type
        i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown
        man s e x y ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

      • denver

         I’m average size 6/7. I look young for my age which is common, or in a
        way that is common, so I don’t feel it’s necessarily my look as far as
        that. I like grown men but I attract young boys. They are the hardest to
        get out of your face. They don’t care about age, if you have a
        man……like lil boy please. I attract men as well, but not the type
        i’m looking for. You  know the one that’s fine, and just on some grown
        man s e x y ish lol at whatever that is but I know it when I see it !

    • sash

      i 2nd that, i do too– im a small framed young woman that still get little boys in high school with their book bags and all still trying to holla —i know im baby faced but sheesh– and men my age wont really date me — because i look like i belong in high school –they’re probably thinking jailbait lol

    • sash

      i 2nd that, i do too– im a small framed young woman that still get little boys in high school with their book bags and all still trying to holla —i know im baby faced but sheesh– and men my age wont really date me — because i look like i belong in high school –they’re probably thinking jailbait lol

  • LiiSH

    I can definitely co-sign a few of these points. I will admit that my taste in men has been a bit questionable. i would try to justify their lack of ambition or equality with my accomplishments by saying that I liked them for who they were and not what they 1. could do for me or 2. had for themselves. That was only a half truth when i realized that I was dating boys who lacked ambition to be men. They wanted to depend on me. Shoot, I would be dreaming of some guy I knew who had it all together, dating a buster, and telling myself that the guy who was either on my level or was at a level that I was aggressively trying to reach would never find me good enough. I wanted to have it all before I tried to be stable with some man who was successful. So in the meanwhile I end up dating the boys to pass the time until I am at a point where i can pursue the kind of man I want.

  • RenJennM

    These are all true! Except for the needy part… YIKES! Never that! lol 

    But I agree with the parts about me (and my best friends) not really having OUR lives completely together yet (we’re all 23yrs old), so we feel that these “boys” are the best we could do for now. For the most part, I’m fine with being single. I’ve been single for most of my life anyway. But as a woman, I do crave a male’s company every now and then, and my friends are no different. So, I guess these “boys” fill that void for the time being. We’re all working on ourselves, but some of the things are taking time (for example, we won’t be able to qualify for our apartments until A YEAR from now). 

    I don’t feel comfortable going for the kind of men I truly want because I’m currently not what they would want. And I’m not looking for a man to upgrade me — that would only welcome control and abuse. I am working on upgrading myself, so that when I do meet the kind of men I want, I won’t shy away. Would it make sense to stay COMPLETELY single and not even deal with bullsh*t these immature dudes put us through, or should we continue to have our young fun, and when we’re ready for better, go for better?

    • LiiSH

       Yes! I am 22 years old and actively trying to build a life for myself. You took the words right out of my mouth. These boys are there to pass the time! But too many girls get caught up in them SMH…

    • Cchigbu23

      24 here, and I am with you.
       

    • Caroneisha

      Great minds do think alike. I’m 21 and I’ve always thought like that. But I am completely single, cause that’s the only way you can truly work on self.

      • RenJennM

        I think you have a great point there. Seems like whenever I’m COMPLETELY single, I really start evaluating my mistakes made in the last “romantic situation”, and I get to really take the time to get myself together and regroup.

    • BW

      There must be something goin on here…because I am a single male around your age and I have met very few bw without children at our age.

      • RenJennM

        Really?! Wow. That’s strange because I don’t have any kids and most of best friends, except for one, don’t have kids either. And we’re all Black.