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When you first start dating someone, you take a huge risk. It takes years to really know a person. And the work it takes to do so, Those of us who’ve done enough dating have discovered something unpleasant about a person we were once infatuated with. Hopefully that something unpleasant wasn’t that your partner had a fundamental issue with your identity or personhood.

Sadly, that’s what one woman named Madison Amelia discovered during this very contentious presidential campaign of Donald Drumpf.

In a video she recorded and posted on Facebook, you can hear her White boyfriend ranting about Black Lives Matter, complaining about President Obama inciting riots and calling her girlfriend a dumb n*gger.

It’s so, so hard to believe. But there is audiovisual proof. Be forewarned, this audio is extremely racist, hateful and offensive. You cannot play this video aloud in mixed company.

For those of you who can’t play this out loud right now, here’s the transcript.

“Him –

“You don’t like it, get the fuck out.

You know what? That’s what Drumpf should do. The second he’s elected, give all you mother fuckers your tickets back.

You don’t like it, peace! black lives matter? Go matter to fucking Ghana. Go dig for fucking diamonds over there. Have fun.”

Her –

“You do realize you sound like a racist, right?”

Him –

“Maddie I don’t care. You want to know why? Cause I’m not up there saying white lives matter. White lives come to the front.

Black lives go to the back. I’m just like ‘hey what’s up. How you doing?’ but when you want to come at me with your fucking black lives matter

and this that and the other thing and the white people need to go to the back because black people always had to go to the back now the white people need to do it?

Fuck your black ass. Get the fuck out. Get out of my country. You’re causing the fucking problem. Bye! Here’s your ticket back to mother fucking Nigeria. Peace out.”


“I never said any of that.”

Him –

“The guy you voted for is the number one fucking head of that fucking bullshit. Fucking started the shit and fucking incites fucking riots. When he said I support the black lives matter movement,

that’s it, you’re done. You’re done. You’re a dumb fucking n*gg*r in my book. You have no fucking value to me.”

Her –

“You do realize that makes you sound like a racist when you use racial slurs that way.”

Him –

“Then don’t be a dumb n*gg*r. Don’t be a dumb fucking n*gg*r. Don’t be an average shoe shine boy. Get a job, go to work, do something other than sitting there making fucking videos about ‘fuck Donald Drumpf. Going take my mom’s fucking food stamps away. blahblahblah I’mma start a war. I’mma go to war.’ Why don’t you get a fucking job, you fucking n*gg*r?

Jesus christ. Sound like a racist all the fuck I want. I’m right.”

On Facebook, Madison told the Brown Girl Squad that the man, who was physically as well as emotionally abusive, is now her ex boyfriend. Today, months after the incident, she’s happy and in another relationship.

Madison said that she decided to share the video because, “I know I can’t be the only one to have experienced [this] and I wanted people to know that there is so much love on the other side of an abusive relationship. It’s scary to leave but well worth it.”

After I’d given the background of this story to my mother, I played this audio aloud for her to hear. After a few seconds, the look of shock and disgust was replaced with utter confusion. She wondered why he would date her if he felt so strongly against Black people.

The only thing I could think was that slave masters carried on sexual and sometimes even romantic relationships with the very women they owned. Additionally, her boyfriend sounds like a bit of a sadist. Perhaps, he was with her simply because being with a Black woman made him feel superior in his bigotry and hatred.

If you look at the comment section for the story on Brown Girl Squad, several people wondered if Madison had moved on to another White man. Really, that’s not the issue. Clearly not all White men are with Black women for the reasons Madison’s ex was with her. And there are plenty of men who date women within their race simply to oppress them. Racism is not the only way you can oppress a woman.

Still, this type of racial violence in a relationship is a different type, perhaps more unexpected betrayal. The thought that she shared some level of intimacy with this man when he clearly regarded her as something less than human, is terrifying. Thankfully, she’s removed herself from that situation.


Veronica Wells is the culture editor at She is also the author of “Bettah Days.” You can follow her on Facebook and Twitter @VDubShrug.

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