If you know the time, money and energy it takes to buy food and cook it, then you know the rage one feels when people act like they don’t want to eat it.
When my parents used to have disputes and give one another the silent treatment, my mother would still try to have dinner ready for my dad and the rest of us. But if he was still feeling pissy, he would go out and get food to eat for himself. I always commended my mom for not scratching his eyes out…
I’ve seen men leave plates in the fridge or throw them in the garbage in the movies (now that’s cold blooded). And I’ve read about women who make meals for their spouse only to watch them avoid the dishes because they’re a little too “different.” As in, a fancy casserole, homemade soup, anything without meat.
But what about a woman whose boyfriend seems incapable of eating what she cooks if she doesn’t put his plate together?
Look, now and then I’ll make my fiancé’s plate after cooking. But when I’m beat, he knows to come in and gather his own plate. But one woman’s boyfriend literally will make a whole new meal or not eat if his girlfriend doesn’t serve what she cooked. You already know this is petty, but humor me with this throwback account from Cafemom:
Well, last night I made bacon cheeseburgers and french fries from scratch before he was home from work. The time it took me to clean the kitchen, prepare dinner, cook dinner was over an hour. So he gets home and takes a shower immediately. Then he goes to the store for like 30 minutes. When he gets home I am in the shower. I get out of the shower and he’s sitting on the couch. I look in the kitchen and there is a pot of water boiling on the stove. I’m like, “why didn’t you make the food I made for you?” He just says that he’s tired and it’s easier to make mac n cheese instead and didn’t feel like bugging me to make his plate for him when he knows I’m probably tired.
Really?? It’s easier to make nasty ass mac n cheese but not make a f–king plate of food that’s basically already done for you. The bacon is already on the cheeseburgers. The tomato and lettuce already cut up. The buns are right there.
I proceed then to get pissed off. I’m thinking, you a–hole I just made you dinner and you can’t show some sort of respect by eating it? He says that he wasn’t trying to be rude AT ALL just didn’t want to bug me.
So then I’m pissed cause he won’t eat what I made and I’m pissed cause he’s a moron who doesn’t know how to put a cheeseburger together..
I told him – Have you ever spent a long time doing something for me then have me turn around and not want it? Do you know what that feels like? He just kinda blew me off cause I was being a b—h.
So I made him the plate and he ate it all, he thanked me a lot and said it was a great burger and blah blah…
Am I overreacting?!? Would you be irritated to[sic]??
Interestingly, the reactions on the thread were varied. People told the woman to try and change the meals she was making to ones he stated that he likes and can put together for himself. Some said they would love if their significant others would make their own meals sometimes. And some told her that her boyfriend was an idiot who needed to make his own food in general.
As for moi, I would definitely be irritated. Very irritated at the idea that he can’t seem to put a few veggies and a pattie with bacon between two slices of bread. The struggle must be extraordinarily real.
And while he may not have meant to be a jerk, the fact that he took the time to go to the store and buy what he needed to create a whole new meal, rather than putting the burgers together or just asking her to help him out is crazy too. C’mon, sir…
But this is what happens when people have grown up with folks at their beck and call. They then expect those who come into their lives later to be their personal chefs and replace their mothers, as though people don’t have anything better to do.
Again, cooking for someone is something done out of love, and you don’t want people to take your act of love for granted. Like, take it for granted to the point that they’ll actually cook something else while your meal gets cold on the stove, and then just expect you not to care. So she did what I would have recommended: She let him know how hurtful his actions were to her, and ridiculous. But if I were her, I also would have told him that he needs to be providing dinner for the next few days–and washing the dishes that come with them…
But as always, that’s just my opinion. What do you think? Was he petty or was she overreacting? How would you have handled this situation?