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The holidays are swiftly approaching, which means there is ample opportunity for people’s families to act the complete fool. And one man’s family made sure they got a head start. Meet “Jared.” He’s 35 years old, and her has been with his 30-year-old girlfriend, Sammy, for over a year. He is planning to propose in a few months, and it seems that they were looking forward to spending the holiday season with his family, but that probably won’t be happening now.

You see, Sammy recently overheard Jared’s family running her down during one of their get-togethers—and it wasn’t pretty. Jared turned to the folks of Reddit hoping to get some advice regarding his situation.

Last week, I went to my parent’s house for dinner. We get together as a family a few times a month. It’s been a tradition with us for years now. Sammy usually joins us for these dinners but had work obligations. I told my family she wouldn’t be joining us that night. Halfway through dinner, I got up to go to the bathroom, and Sammy texted me that she was outside. She got off work early and came over to hang out. She would have normally walked in (which is normal) but she needed help bringing in some gifts. Sammy is leaving tomorrow for a work trip and a personal vacation to see some friends, so she won’t be back until Thanksgiving. My brother and sister (twins) have their birthday next week, and my girlfriend had gifts for them.

At this point, my family had no idea Sammy was there. We walked inside and headed to the kitchen, and we overheard my family talking.

My sister was saying that she was glad my girlfriend was gone because she couldn’t stand a family night being ruined by my girlfriend being annoying. My brother and other sister agreed about how annoying and awful my girlfriend is. My dad made a comment about how they should be nice to Sammy. And my mom chimed in with, “Sammy is nice, and all but I can’t believe Jared likes how fat she is, he can do so much better.” My family, even my dad, agreed. And my sister piped up that I was dating down because I’m still rebounding from my last girlfriend, which was five years ago.

Of course, Sammy and Jared were both upset by what they heard.

I was floored. My family has always been so nice to Sammy, and I’ve never heard them talk badly about her. I’ve never heard my family say mean things about anyone, to be honest.

Sammy walked into the kitchen and dumped the presents on the counter. She was crying and mumbled something about happy birthday and then took off out the door. My family looked shocked and a bit embarrassed.

Sammy and Jared left his family’s home together without really speaking to them. According to Jared, there were never signs that his relatives disliked Sammy, and the entire situation was especially devastating to Sammy, who doesn’t have many relatives over her own.

Now, Sammy is usually tough but family is super important to her. She has no family, aside from an alcoholic dad that she doesn’t have any contact with. My family was like her surrogate family and something she always wanted. She was overjoyed when my family welcomed her and invited her to family events. The presents she brought my sister and brother were paintings she had spent many hours working on.

Did we mention the fact that Sammy helped Jared’s brother get a job with her company and that she frequently babysits his sister’s kids? Oh yeah, with the exception of his father, Jared’s relatives refuse to apologize to Sammy directly.

All of them have reached out to me with weak apologies full of justifications. I asked my mom if she had apologized to Sammy, and my mom said I could pass on the apology.

Talk about starting off the holiday season on the wrong foot. How should Jared handle this situation?

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