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Some women love to run down their credentials after achieving some level of success, and many times it’s usually after asking the infamous question, “why am I single?”

Some of us equate college degrees, material gains, and superficial qualities to “the ideal wife” and we automatically assume that men should be jumping over fences to ‘holla’ at us. But seriously, when it comes to relationships, does this matter to him as much as you really think it does? Is what you’re offering really what a man wants in a relationship?

I have plenty of friends who hold multiple degrees, they’re successful in their careers, and many of them are attractive and keep their bodies healthy. Yet and still, the majority of them are single. This could partly have to do with the fact that the more a woman achieves, the more she expects from her man. And there isn’t anything totally wrong with that. However, when she relies solely on what she has instead of who she is, that could be a problem.

While men may initially be attracted to beauty and success, I can bet both of my master’s degrees that neither of those things can keep him around. So ladies, besides your beauty and all of your educational accolades, what are you really bringing to the table in a relationship? And is it enough to keep you and your man happy?

Relationships are about compromise, consideration, and teamwork, all of the things that brings you closer to a person. Most men want their woman to be a friend, a lover, and someone they can trust. And believe me, none of those traits can be taught in an undergraduate course or in professional development training.

Comforting a man and knowing just the right words to say when he’s down on his luck is something a woman can bring to the table that a man can’t offer himself. Knowing how or when to cook his favorite meal (if cooking is your thing), is what some men consider an asset. Or more importantly, being resourceful and knowing how to help out if either of you get in a financial bind.

Most men expect to be providers, and while having a woman who can take care of herself should be appealing to a real man, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he considers it an asset to his life. Sure you make your own money, pay your bills on time, and have a resume that puts most men to shame, but honestly what does that have to do with him? That is unless he’s looking to live off of you of course, and we all know that we don’t want a man like that!

So ladies, before you throw out a long list of accomplishments, credit scores, and salaries when thinking of what you can bring to the table in a relationship, take a minute to think of those things that cannot be bought, earned, or achieved by doing an excessive amount of squats.

Now, ask yourself again, what do you bring to the table in a relationship?

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