MadameNoire Featured Video

From SingleBlackMale

In college, life was in a stage of transition. We are transitioning in our academics, and we’re transitioning within ourselves. We go through so many changes and these have an impact our relationships. Our wants and needs in relationships can change as well. In college, we forged many new relationships with each other. It is also often said that you’ll meet some of your lifelong friends in college.

In college, we built strong bonds with people; some of which are translated romantically. The nature of your relationship with someone really depended on whatever medium the two of you meet. When I say medium I am referring to an agreement or compromise. To be clear; relationships and titles were two totally different things.

Were you engrossed in the feeling and validation of a title? I.e. being a boyfriend or girlfriend — or do you appreciate a companionship more? The truth is, back in college, there were many people with titles on their relationship so that others could define what they had. It gave you a sense of security if you were not sure what you meant to someone.

Titles offer validation, some authenticity; just like a title on a car or deed on an apartment. By no means am I against the institution of a relationship between a boyfriend and girlfriend, but such relationships must be forged in the right spirit. You want both parties to be willing and able to contribute the way that they should.

Your relationship is really where things happen. Your relationship is the foundation, which should be higher on your priority list. Your relationship is the bond you share with someone and to me, is the core of anything resembling a title. I say that to say this, a relationship may allow more flexibility than a title. Believe it or not, titles conjure up some obligations that aren’t always able to be met. Although these obligations may be few they may be hard to always keep up.


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