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Hi Damon,
There’s this reality show coming out about pregnant women trying to find dates. Naturally, these women aren’t with the men that impregnated them and they don’t want to wait nine months before they date and have sex again. I’ve heard from women who’ve been pregnant that their libido is heightened and the sex feels better etc. And I’ve heard several men say sex with a pregnant woman feels better because things are tighter and juicer. (LL Cool J even admitted to having sex with a pregnant woman–not his wife– in his interview with Oprah.) I understand that it feels good and whatnot. But I don’t understand how men are able to completely dismiss the evidence that, not only has another man been with this woman, a part of him is literally growing inside of her. Even though I know having sex won’t hurt the baby, something about it seems disrespectful. So the question is do you know men who’ve done this? And if not can you tell us how you think men might be able to rationalize something like this?
Thanks in advance,
Please Explain

Dear Please Explain,
Couch cushions. Watermelon. Catcher’s mitts. Vaseline bottles. Old sneakers. A peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Vents at public swimming pools. Buckets of soup.
These are just a few—well, the printable few—of the many things I’ve heard of males (boys and men) having sex with. I’m not saying this to compare a pregnant woman to an old pair of Iverson’s. Pregnant women are glowing and beautiful and regal and blah, blah, blah. blah. I just wanted to drive home the point that for many men, the sensation of sticking your wang into…anything is all about the sensation (and, um, release) and nothing else. I think the term “cognitive dissonance” is applicable here. And, when something that’s already THE BEST THING ON EARTH is made to feel “tighter and juicier” there’s no rationalization needed other than “I need to rationalize a way to find some more pregnant chicks.”
(Plus, if you take a more cynical approach, some guys might prefer dating already pregnant women because 1. You know they’re Fawking and 2. No need for condoms. Note: I didn’t say guys who think this way are smart. Just cynical)
Fortunately, most men aren’t like this. And while the sex may be awesome, I can’t see many guys waiting in line for the opportunity to have sex with a woman who is visibly pregnant with another man’s child. At lease not many guys who women would actually want to be with. It’s not so much about “disrespect” as its just “preferring to be with women who aren’t currently growing another human being inside of them.”


Damon Young

Pittsburgh native Damon Young (aka “The Champ”) is the co-founder of the ridiculously popular Their first book “Your Degrees Won’t Keep You Warm At Night: The Very Smart Brothas Guide To Dating, Mating and Fighting Crime” is available at

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