“That Sh*t Sound Wild” Deyjah’s Mother Shares Her Thoughts On Hymen-Gate
Last week, we wrote about Deyjah Harris responding to her father, rapper T.I.’s comments about her hymen and virginity. Naturally, she didn’t appreciate it. And the whole thing made things tense between her and her father.
In yesterday’s episode of “Friends and Family Hustle,” we saw how things further unfolded and even heard from Deyjah’s mother and her thoughts on the whole thing.
At the start of the episode, Deyjah tells producers in the confessional that her father “made me a little target.”
She shared how people online reacted to the news as well.
“Some of the stuff was stupid. Like putting my face on olive oil cuz it’s virgin. And other comments were from grown men.”
Before T.I. speaks to Deyjah about anything, Tiny talks to Monica, LeToya and Toya about her husband’s overshare. She seems to be defending T.I. in the matter.
Tiny: But at the same time, she did something that prompted him to be like, ‘Oh, that’s what you doing? Ok, I’m taking you to the doctor to see what’s going on with you.’ She should have been like ‘Listen, you shouldn’t come to the doctor with me to see what I’m doing.’ He probably would have thought about that a little bit more.
In the confessionals, Monica and Toya dispel the myth that a broken hymen
Tiny: I can see her being a little uncomfortable but if she popped up pregnant, they’d be talking about that too.
Later, during their last night in Mexico, Tiny says that T.I. hasn’t talked to Deyjah because he wants to give her some space and wants to wait for her to come to him. Meanwhile, Deyjah is adamant about her father being the one to approach her.
During the dinner, the kids, Reginae, Zonnique and Deyjah, who are legally, grown sing a song about trying to get drunk. And though the two haven’t spoken, T.I. takes that opportunity to call Deyjah over and offer some advice…
“Ayy listen. Engage in 18-year-old engagements. Not 21 and up engagements. There’s younger kids out here watching you. Be responsible.”
It was a missed opportunity.
“Okay, what?! I thought he was going to talk to me about everything. But nope. I just don’t want to be here anymore. Yeah. I’m ready to go.”
In her confessional, Deyjah said, “Dad, has always taught me there are consequences to your actions. So hopefully, in the future, he’ll take his own advice.
Thankfully, Deyjah had a couple of advocates in her cousins who came to T.I .and Tiny after the Mexico trip to talk to them about how devastated Deyjah was to learn that her father had discussed her business all over the internet. And for the first time, T.I. starts to recognize the gravity of his words. He seemed truly hurt
“Honestly, I was just joking. It’s like if I was to talk about the boys peeing in the bed. We evolved and we past it.”
The nieces told him that it wasn’t a joke to Deyjah and having her sexuality out there didn’t exactly sit well with her. That’s when T.I. says,
“If it’s serious to her, it’s serious to me.”
In his confessional, T.I. says that if Deyjah had to come to him to have that conversation he would have been receptive to it. Thankfully, his nieces told him that she didn’t want to do that. And T.I. says he’ll speak to her. But in the days after the vacation, Deyjah wasn’t answering her father’s phone calls.
Ranniqua: You and I know that she’s very sensitive. People are coming at her so I feel like you kind of put her in that line of fire…I just think that the way you said it, you left it open…
T.I. Because It was a joke.
Ranniqua: It’s the way that you told that particular, terrible Dad joke and then you gave information. C’mon man. That sh*t sound wild. You probably shouldn’t have made a joke at all. Hindsight is 20/20
T.I. I can receive that.
But Ranniqua had some words to share in T.I.’s favor.
Ranniqua: Please give this man a little bit of slack. Deyjah is his first daughter. He was not raised with sisters in the house. So, the way that he approaches certain things are a little sketchy to women now because he’s not been raised around women to know the dos and do nots.
T.I.: If I have genuine and sincere intentions to protect my daughter, what is the proper way to have the information that we need to have.
Ranniqua: Ask your daughter. And whether she tells you yes or no, believe her. Because really, at the end of the day, whether or not her hymen is in tact, it is not telling of whether or not she had sex. So if you tell the doctor to check her hymen and she’s told you, I’ve not done anything and her hymen was broken and she was telling the truth, now you coming down on her, telling her that she’s lying.
In the confessional, T.I. says ‘I’m beginning to realize, damn, I didn’t know as much as I thought I did.’ I think that due to my own ignorance of certain issues, I’m going to step back.
On the podcast, Ranniqua says, Deyjah feels that there is no trust for what she says. Then she asks T.I. the million dollar question.
Ranniqua: It’s a bit misogynistic because do you do the same for your sons? Would you ever do that sir? No, you would not.
At the end of the conversation, T.I. says that he’s able to accept full responsibility and acknowledges how wrong he was. He said this was the first time his daughter made him feel like he was in trouble. In the confessional, he had a message for Deyjah.
T.I.: I apologize to Deyjah. You know I love you. You know I’ve always gone above and beyond to do any and every thing possible to make you happy and keep you protected. But I have to acknowledge the fact that you have now become a young lady. I understand that. Some lessons are learned harder than others. But the important thing is, make sure you get the lesson.