Image Source: Shutterstock
Some people are really shy about any and everything that has to do with flatulence and bowel movements. So shy that they’re willing to carry around pieces of poop to keep from having to tell a romantic interest that they stopped up their toilet.
Like a Twitter user named Makela, a.k.a., user “_blotty.”
She shared a very interesting story on the social media site last night about a first date that managed to go really well and really bad at the same time. Blame it not on the alcohol, but on coffee and a fickle toilet. Here are the 18 tweets that just went viral:
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712126522937745408
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712127018649960452
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712127365074296832
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712127578354663424
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712127899340509185
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712128076587671553
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712128408969453568
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712128639136079872
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712128738889232384
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712129180700418048
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712129443569999872
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712130072828907520
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712130693732630528
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712130922997542913
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712131132712738816
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712132092872802304
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712132378681085952
https://twitter.com/_blotty/status/712133058237964288
Yes, this story is crazy. It’s an interesting blend of shock and hilarity.
And while I could laugh at it, I also couldn’t help but be very confused. As Buzzfeed pointed out, a few women took to Makela’s Twitter page after reading her story to share their own awkward encounters with their poop while with romantic interests and friends. From the woman who said her friend rode all the way home with poop in her purse after clogging a guy’s toilet during their first date, to another woman who threw her poop out of the bathroom window of her boyfriend’s parents’ house after clogging their toilet, to my friend who said she would have just closed the door and left his home, not saying anything, people are okay with doing the most to keep from being embarrassed.
But why are we so embarrassed? I think we forget just how natural certain things are. Which is why some people wait a long time before burping or passing gas around their partner, or they will just stay incredibly uncomfortable, waiting to release a bowel movement only when they get back into their own home. But how hard would it really have been for Makela, or anyone else in a situation like this, to crack open the door and be honest? Not graphically honest, but “Hey, so I’m going to need your plunger because things just went left in here” honest? If he would have had a problem with her needing to go No. 2 in his place, well, she didn’t need to be messing with him in the first place.
I think we’ve all found ourselves in front of a toilet that wouldn’t accept our “gifts,” so instead of ruining our good bags and walking around with doo-doo fingers during a date, we probably need to get over ourselves already. Otherwise, it’s constantly going to be a sh-t show.
Get it?!
