How You Can Tell A Man Has No Integrity

February 23, 2015  |  
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Men who believe they can hide their dick-ery until much later in the relationship just aren’t smart. We can spot a bad man within one date, especially when these tale-tell signs a man has no integrity show up.


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He tries to get free stuff at restaurants

On your date, his food is running a little bit late, and when the server asks, “Is there anything we can do to make it up to you?” he says, “A free drink wouldn’t hurt.”

He tries to get free stuff at restaurants

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He just screwed over that server

When a server comps an item, they usually have to explain that comped item to a manager and if the manager deems it the server’s fault, the price of that item is coming out of his or her paycheck.

He knows who her new boyfriend is

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He avoids conflict

Waiting on the curb for a cab, the couple next to you is arguing. It’s getting pretty loud and uncomfortable and he goes out of his way to have nothing to do with it and carries on a conversation as if two people aren’t yelling right next to you.

He only looks out for himself

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He only looks out for himself

A man with integrity keeps an eye on a situation like that, ready to step in if he feels the woman is in danger or being disrespected. He doesn’t have the mindset, “Not my problem.” He is willing to fight for others.

He writes off his exes

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He writes off his exes

When your date asks about your last relationship,he gives a totally dismissive answer like, “It didn’t work out. Whatever.”

He doesn’t learn; hence he doesn’t grow

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He doesn’t learn; hence he doesn’t grow

Any half mature human being formulates at least an informative answer when telling a date about an ex. It could be as simple as, “We just wanted different things.” Speaking dismissively about past relationships shows that, when someone is no longer in his life, he acts as if they’re nothing.

He skips memorials/funerals/commemorative events

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He skips memorials/funerals/commemorative events

He finds out his favorite college professor passed away recently. There was a memorial just a 15-minute drive away, but he doesn’t go because he says it would have been uncomfortable.

He only cares about the now

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He only cares about the now

He always looks out for his own momentary, current comfort over being an overall good, respectful human being. He’d rather skip a memorial than endure an hour of discomfort, if it meant showing respect.

He doesn’t care when someone’s mad at him

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He doesn’t care when someone’s mad at him

One of his best friends or his mother is mad at him. You ask what he’s going to do about it and he says, “Nothing. They can either get over it or not.”

Again, he avoids conflict

He either assumes he’s always right and has no reason to apologize, or doesn’t value relationships enough to tough out an uncomfortable conversation in order to make amends with that person again. He just moves on to hanging out with people who never cause a fuss.

He watches you in social settings

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He takes shortcuts at work

He proudly tells you that his boss gave him a task that she thought should take three hours and it only took you one so he sat around doing nothing for the next two hours.

He doen’t think of others

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He doen’t think of others

This is similar to taking that free drink from that server: this man never steps into another person’s shoes and asks himself, “Is my pleasure somehow harming or cheating another person right now?”

He hangs out with people he doesn’t like

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He hangs out with people he doesn’t like

Everybody has to hang a little bit with people they don’t like for career or work purposes. But he actively includes people he talks sh*t about in his social life, appearing to be their best friend.

There's always intense emotions

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He’s superficial

He would rather surround himself with people he doesn’t enjoy (and thereby talk sh*t about them every day) than with people he likes, so long as it advances his career/gets him ahead/gets something he wants.

He walks alone

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He walks alone

When he’s out with his woman he doesn’t walk on the side of traffic, mind her speed, or keep an eye out for things she could run into or creepy guys who might harass her. He walks exactly the way you would walk even if nobody else was walking with him.

He gets angry if you want space

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He does this his way or no way

You can tell a lot about somebody by the way they walk with others. Men with integrity feel protective of their dates when they walk together. They don’t rush ahead of them, or stop to watch the football game on a television window, letting their date, unbeknownst to herself, walk ahead alone.

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