When I first saw the preview of the upcoming episode of Iyanla, Fix My Life airing this Saturday, I knew I would be tuning in to see what the deep, dark secret a former pastor was hiding from his wife of 20 years. Of course I expected the worst. Was it a sex addiction? An affair? Was he under investigation for rape charges? I just knew for some reason it had to do with some sexual deviance. For the most part, I was right.
A Huffington Post piece reveals that David is a former pastor, husband and father to two sons who has been married to his wife, Jennifer, for 20 years. In “Fix My Life” fashion, David has also secretly been living a double life that includes a pornography addiction and meeting potential sex partners in chat rooms on-line.
During the episode, Iyanla learns that David has moved into his own apartment but still visits the family home regularly for weekly dinners. Jennifer still wears her wedding ring as well as David’s which he removed two years ago. The couple found comfort in one another at the beginning of the relationship, but David goes on to reveal that the marriage was over the day it began because it was never what he wanted and he proposed only “playfully”.
In the video the couple confront one another and David admits his proposal came more out of a need to feel normal, more than actually wanting to build a life with Jennifer. In regards to moving forward, he reveals:
“My choices to remain in a marriage that I knew I didn’t want, it does not diminish that I care. It doesn’t diminish that I love you. Because I do. I do want you to be my friend.”
I’m sorry, but 20 years, dude? You lived a lie for 20 years? I get it: People live a long time struggling to keep skeletons in the closet to avoid confrontation, not only with the people close to them, but also with themselves. But what they fail to realize is what a huge injustice that does to other people who believe they are in a solid, legit relationship. All this time, Jennifer could have been with a man who truly wanted to be her husband. I’m sure she wants to choke slam David for taking twenty years to be honest about the fact the he looks at her as nothing more than a “bestie”.
“Iyanla: Fix My Life” airs Saturday, June 7, at 9 p.m. ET on OWN if you’re waiting to see if Jennifer has the last laugh. In the meantime, take a look at David revealing exactly how the “playful” proposal came to be: