MN Exclusive: Jacque Reid Talks Being Single And Fab, Interracial Dating And Her Relationship With Lamman Rucker

January 17, 2014 ‐ By

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I had the awesome opportunity to meet TV and radio personality Jacque Reid, and she is in person as she is on TV: smart, personable, energetic, funny and insightful. The co-host of NBC’s New York Live and the former anchor of BET Nightly News and a voice I’m sure you’ve heard on The Tom Joyner Morning Show, Reid has done very well for herself as a journalist. But how have things been when it comes to her love life? We chatted with the Atlanta, Ga. native about that, as well as her new website, Singleandlivingfab.com, which is launching fully in February and is for all women, single, married and divorced, because as Jacque says, “our lives all parallel.” She talks about the purpose of her site, interracial dating, her time on reality TV (Vh1’s Let’s Talk About Pep), if she thinks she’ll ever get married and have kids, and how to live single and fab.

The Purpose Of Her Site, Single And Living Fab

Singleandlivingfab.com is a website dedicated to encouraging women to live their best single life right where they are. It’s about embracing and celebrating life and not being depressed because you bought into societal thinking that ‘I have to have a husband by this age’ and I have to have kids and I have to have this perfect family, and this type of family and this type of life for people to see that I’m a real woman.’ I debunk that.’

Dating In New York As A Traditional Southern Gal:

I’m lucky that because of what I do, I do meet a lot of men and people are always trying to set me up. In New York, it’s interesting, especially because I’m from the South so I’m used to a much more traditional type of dating experience, even though I’ve been here for 10 years. I still appreciate a man coming to pick me up, taking me back home after and making sure I made it back home okay. New York is a very independent kind of thing when it comes to dating. It’s like, ‘I’ll meet you here and I’ll see you next time.’ I’ve met some nice men who I was not compatible with, and I would say that everyone is not for everyone, and I’ve met some not so nice men.

Her Thoughts On Interracial Dating:

I can’t say I’m against it, I’m definitely open to it–IF I met a man of a different race that I’m compatible with. For me, I love all people, but I especially love black people. I’m very proud to be African American, and I wear it on my sleeve. It has to be someone of a different race who is not going to say to me, ‘Well, aren’t you being a little sensitive about this or that?’ Or ‘The way that someone treated you, maybe it’s not about race.’ I need someone who understands my journey. But maybe there’s a man of a different race who can really empathize with what I’m going through as a black woman in the world. It would have to be that dude, and I haven’t met him yet [laughs].

Finding Peace In Being Single Or Alone In General:

We don’t really give a lot of thought to, ‘who am I really compatible with?’ ‘Are we going to go the distance or is this just someone to be in my life so I can say I have a man and I won’t be stigmatized on Valentine’s Day?’ Some of us are like, ‘Let me just get a man so I can say that I’m in a relationship so I don’t have to say that I’m single.’ For Christmas, I chose not to go home to Atlanta. I did have to do some work over the holidays, but just minimally so I was like, let me just stay here, and chill out and have a staycation. Enjoy New York City. And you know what? On Christmas day I’m just going to be by myself. Friend of mine, actually, when I said that was my plan, tears actually filled up in his eyes. I was like, ‘What’s wrong with you!? I’m happy.” I’m not ashamed of being alone. It doesn’t bother me to say it.

Learning To Date Like Men:

I met a guy one time who asked me out. We were talking on the phone and we were talking about being married in general. He was asking me if I wanted to get married and I said, ‘You know, I would like to.” And I said, ‘What about you?’ And he said, ‘No, because my ex-wife and I decided that we didn’t want to have anybody else raising our kids.’ And right then and there I said ‘Uh uh, I don’t want to date him.’ But if I met him now, I would still date him. Listen, to go out to a dinner, to go to a concert, to hang out with someone and get to know them, you never know how things are going to go. So it’s good to get to know people and just see. Date kind of like men date and stop treating every relationship like it’s going to lead to matrimony.

If She Regrets Doing Reality TV:

None whatsoever. That was so fun! I loved the girls. It was an amazing experience. It was something very different for me but I loved it.

And Where Things Stand With Lamman Rucker, Who Was Featured On The Show And Who She Thought About Having A Child With:

Lamman and I are good friends. And we were long before the show. If you listen to our dialogue, what I am saying is that ‘if I ask you as a friend to have a baby with me, would you do it?’ He and I have never dated. Never thought about dating. Never even had the conversation. We are just friends and people walk away from that with, ‘Girl you’re tripping. You need to get with him!’ It was never on the table. He’s a good friend and I adore him and I can call on him for anything and he can do the same for me but we never dated, we were never a couple.

Learned From Singlehood:

I know that I’m not looking for perfection, but I’m looking for someone who’s perfect for me. Who fits and who enhances what I already have. I know what I’m looking for in a mate and I hope that I find it. But what I’ve learned about myself is that, I like who I am, even moreso now that I’ve come to this place and this way of thinking.

Her Outlook On Motherhood:

When I was on Let’s Talk About Pep, I wanted to have kids and I was thinking about doing it on my own. But I’ve come to the realization that for me, it won’t work. I need a partner to do it with me. I don’t want to do it by myself. So if that means I’ll never have kids, I’m okay with that. I’ve made peace with that.

Okay With Possibly Being Alone In The Future:

I tell girlfriends of mine, you have to plan your retirement as if that man is not going to be there. So whether you roll out like the Golden Girls and get a condo with the friends in Florida, whatever, but just stop playing. You don’t want sit there and wait for a man to come along to make some kind of plan, and if he comes along then great. But if not, then you’ve already got something fabulous planned. I don’t know what it is or what it’s going to be, but plan a fabulous life for yourself.

She’s really one of the nicest women in media, folks. Be sure to check out her website, Single and Living Fab, and if you live in New York, check her out on New York Live at 12:30 p.m. on weekdays.

 

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  • Dominique Thompson

    Love her. She IS the epitome of single and fabulous. It’s about being optimistic but also being ok with you in the meantime.

  • get real

    What she said about interracial dating was spot on. Get a white person that gets it, as opposed to dating some white dude that is going to tell you that you are overacting when faced with racism.

    • Chey

      White people aren’t the only options.

      • Blackhawk

        for k00ns they are.. they can’t breathe without a white person

  • Blackhawk

    Delusional..

  • on

    I can’t wait to see this web site she is launching. I am single with three children and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. If I never find a man to marry and I’m single for the rest of my life I have my children. My children (2 boys and 1 daughter) are so loving and affectionate and now that I am older I really need an affectionate man and my children are reminders of that. My friend said to me you are affectionate and you were in relationships where you had to hold that back because those men were not like that. I refuse to hold back who I am to anyone else anymore I am going to be completely me at all times and if a man doesn’t like it he isn’t the one for me. I have learned a lot about myself being single.

    • Chaz

      What happens when your kids grow up, and get families of their own? Yes you may have them now, but kids tend to branch off as they get older. You know who you are, and you are content with yourself, so why not date and get to know other men? You never know, you may meet a man who makes you happy. No one likes to grow old by themselves.

      • newgirl

        Amen too that! I have empty nest syndrome and it ain’t pretty. I realized that once I sent my only daughter off to college now WHAT lol?

        • Chaz

          Get out there and test the waters! Lol. I say take chances. You never know what good can come from it.

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