9 Ways To Know If You Have Enemies Disguised As Friends

8 comments
September 3, 2013 ‐ By Kendra Koger
enemies disguised as friends

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Friendships are extremely important in a person’s life.  As much as you might want to just cut off all people, besides family, having friends in your life can be a great comfort to you.  So, don’t disregard friendships entirely.  Just disregard the fake friends that shouldn’t be in your life.  Now, this is a topic that has been greatly discussed, but it’s always good to have more tips on how to spot a fake friend.  Especially if you tend to see the best in people and try to give them the benefit of the doubt, just stay vigilant with noticing:

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  • Sarah T.

    Irony–calling someone out on their comments about Black hair, having a full page hair ad behind the blog for African American women’s hair products that ONLY depicts the women with unnaturally straightened hair.

    The message is lost in this blogs overuse of advertising. How many scroll over links really need to have an ad?

  • Kristen

    Not only do people like to play games in relationships, but friendships too. It’s really hard to find true and authentic people to be friends with. Really not understanding why people find it so hard to be real and down to earth. It’s always a competition, or it’s easier to avoid an issue than really trying to fix it. The popularity of reality TV that glorifies drama and backstabbing doesn’t help either. People try to act that out in real life.

    I’d like to hear from the people that are backstabbers, liars and that ruined friendships. The ones who really did it. Not just the people who have had to cut people out of their lives but the ones who had been cut. Do they ever take responsibility? Do they jump from friend to friend after they’ve been cut? Why do all that sh*t?? They can never tell you! Or if they do, they’re playing the victim somehow!

  • Kristen

    Not only do people like to play games in relationships, but friendships too. It’s really hard to find true and authentic people to be friends with. Really not understanding why people find it so hard to be real and down to earth. It’s always a competition, or it’s easier to avoid an issue than really trying to fix it. The popularity of reality TV that glorifies drama and backstabbing doesn’t help either. People try to act that out in real life.

    I’d like to hear from the people that are backstabbers, liars and that ruined friendships. The ones who really did it. Not just the people who have had to cut people out of their lives but the ones who had been cut. Do they ever take responsibility? Do they jump from friend to friend after they’ve been cut? Why do all that sh*t?? They can never tell you! Or if they do, they’re playing the victim somehow!

    • Beth

      Most of the people you want to hear from are the manipulator that will almost never admit fault. The yellers, they will say things like “lose my number” when you tell them something that bothered you…IDK, had a few in my life and some just recently that I cut off.

      They will not wish you growth, maturation and prosperity, but rather compete and always want to make sure they are the most successful and beneficial from the “friendship”.

      It will make them uncomfortable when others recognize your realness and are drawn to you. The will try to “block” the connection.

      I have a habit of being really nice to new people but have decided to show my whole self to new folks now so they don’t think they can get over as they often do.

      Girl, I wanna hear from the backstabbers too lol.

      I’ve had “freinds” who were suddenly uncomfortable when I came out of my shell. I wasn’t boisterous or anything just stating my opinion and talking to guys. They could no longer get all the attention because I wasn’t speaking. So, I started getting less and less notice all the way down to a half hour til they were leaving.

      When your friend feels a certain way because a guy asked for your number, she ain’t your friends. She is competing with you in an unhealthy way.

      My issue is that I accept this behavior for too long. I’m done now, about to take a few solo trips ( I’ve met some lovely great people on a past trip).

      Get these losers out your life to make room for great, supportive friends.

      • Kristen

        Yup you are so right! You can be their friend ONLY if you stay in a box. If you sit down and shut up.

        Over the last year I’ve cut off about 5 friends. To me that’s a lot in that time frame. But I can’t continue to question friendships just for the sake of having them. Many times I’ve gone back to friendships thinking that I was overreacting only to find out that I was right and they’ve gotten even worse.

        Taking a solo trip sounds amazing..I gotta do that sometime lol

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  • mac

    I think #9 is the Litmus test for friendship period. Anyone you can’t learn from or doesn’t add value to your life doesn’t need a place in it, period. That’s how I see it.

    Society tells you that if you don’t have many friends, something’s wrong
    with you, so folk would rather be out here entertaining frenemies than
    to have little or no friends at all.

    Y’all can keep that. I can do bad all by myself *shrugs*

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