Third- Party Action: The Benefits of Couples Counseling Before Saying “I Do”

March 9, 2013  |  
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4. Learning From Past Relationships

If you haven’t healed completely from a past hurt or heartache, chances are you’ve probably carried a lot of baggage into your current relationship. Your partner may know little details here and there but he doesn’t fully understand how deep it goes. By discussing your trust issues with a therapist, you put your issues in perspective and he or she can offer you suggestions on how to move past them so that they don’t sabotage your current relationship. You may even discover in counseling that you’re not yet ready to be in another serious relationship until you are truly healed from all your insecurities or pain. Be prepared to accept that your past may still be haunting  you, but counseling can help you get out of the past so that you can enjoy the present and hope for a loving future.

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  • Annie

    I’m 41 years old and my husband has recently told me that he wanted out of the marriage and he actually left a few days later, after 21 years of marriage…
    …After the initial shock wore off and I was able to think straight…

    …I was able to persuade him to give me and the marriage another chance…
    …I had to wing it with only the strategies in the “save the marriage” book

  • Jazmine

    Most couples only think counseling is for AFTER the marriage, not before…because they think if they need counseling before the marriage, then they shouldn’t be getting married. Which MAY BE TRUE!! We would probably have a lower divorce rate if people did this. Good advice

  • Nikki

    Where I live, the marriage license fee is $30 more if you don’t go to pre-marital counseling. I think it’s a great way to discuss topics that make you uncomfortable, such as finances or grounds for divorce-if any. The marriage counselor might bring up something that you may have forgotten to talk about, like TV or no TV in the bedroom.