Reasons Why Black Women Don’t Date White Men

January 4, 2012  |  
2 of 6

Interracial dating has been one of the biggest conversations within the black community. Black men have made it no secret their liking to white women. Regina King recently raised the argument that we as black women still have not become completely comfortable dating outside our race. I recently did a survey on a group of black women regarding their reasons for not dating men who are not of color. Through my findings it seems as though black women aren’t actually opposef to dating outside of their race. Part of the dilemma lies in women of color thinking that men outside of their race won’t be attracted to them. Below are the 5 top reasons black women are apprehensive about going there with a white guy.

1. Body image

Black women are known to be naturally curvaceous. We are praised for our assests by the black men who love us. It has been known that the bigger the backside the better. The rounder the breast the better. The thicker the legs the more beautiful. In the white community this has been the complete opposite. The bigger the butt, the less attractive. If your hips are too wide you’re considered fat. Thinner is usually all around better within the white community. This is naturally engrained in both African American and Caucasian people’s subconscious. Many studies show that black men prefer woman with curves and white men prefer women who are thin. After speaking to 6 black women between the ages of 25-40 most state that they believe a white man would not be attracted to them because of their voluptuous bodies.

2. Hair

Black women have been ridiculed for their hair for many many years. Chris Rock made the movie “Good Hair” that touched on many areas of what black women go through regarding their hair. If we wear it natural it’s consider nappy. If we perm it we’re considered “white washed”. If we have a weave, we aren’t happy with who we are and would really like to be a white woman. Regarding hair we just can’t seem to win.  Since this is already a touchy subject in the black community, it’s obvious as to why a black woman would rather avoid the whole “hair conversation” when dating a white man. Sure most black men hate weaves but the women I surveyed expressed how a black man would understand more because he was raised by a black woman. Because of this, a black man knows all the changes his mother may have went through maintaining her hair. He is no stranger to fake hair or a pressing comb. A white man on the other hand is used to naturally unenhanced straight hair that he gets to run his fingers through. The women I surveyed said they were naturally intimidated when it came to dating a white man because of their hair.

3. Background/Education

Statistics show that Caucasians have more money, better education, better jobs and more opportunities. In the black community, we naturally have to work twice as hard and be 3 times smarter to achieve the level of success deemed to be successful. White men that are very successful will usually date a woman who is as successful or at least in the same class as himself. At least then he feels as if he has something in common with her. Because the black community doesn’t have as many advantages this leaves desirable black women to a minimum.

4. They are never approached by white men

We as black women are constantly criticized for being the ones not open to dating outside of our race but what happens if white men just do not approach us? When I surveyed these women, 4 out of the 6 said they were never even approached by a white guy. Unfortunately black women have the smallest pool to choose from. We are naturally attracted to black men but the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race. Statistics show that white men usually date within their race and if they don’t, they are more likely to date a Hispanic, Asian or pacific islander. The percentage of white men and black women that date is a very low one.

5. Just not attracted to white men

We are also guilty of just not feeling it. 4 out of 6 women also said they were simply not attracted to white men. They felt as if they lacked good looks that they were used to, as well as confidence (swag) and sex appeal. Because of this it was hard for most of them to really become serious about potentially being able to have a serious relationship with a white man.

As you see there are many reasons that stop black women from dating white men. Unfortunately many of the reasons stem from insecurity. I think it’s important for us as black women to not miss out on opportunities just because of insecurities. Insecurity stems from fear and fear can stop you from attaining your blessings. At the same time, we are beautiful creatures who deserve the very best. We should also be able to get exactly what we want. If that happens to be a strong, successful black man, so be it. The sky should be the limit for us. If we truly believe we can and do deserve the very best, that is what will come to us. But it is also important to be open to anything life may have to offer. Life isn’t about being closed minded. Life is about taking chances and enjoying whatever challenges and changes may come our way. If a good looking white guy comes up to you and is interested in you, don’t be so quick to judge or feel you may not measure up in his eyes. If he approached you, that means he’s attracted to you. Love can come in all shades and sizes. Let’s not ever allow stereotypes and judgments determine who we can fall in love with.

Quierra Davis-Martin is the co-author of “The Mean Girls Handbook of Etitiquette” slated to hit shelves 2012. She was also the lead singer of the girl group Isyss. She has a great passion to inspire women all over the world to love themselves and to stay strong and true to themselves in love and in life.

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  • Paul Benjamin

    I’m of opinion that this world needs over haul.. it seems stereotypes still lead people’s desisions in life. People make judgements live life by them as true facts when it’s anything but.. yea sure some people do live up to certain stereotypes.. sum Irish live up to the drunk and disorderly or sum polish live up to the doing things backwards while sum Jewish people live up to being good with money. For examples.. but stereo types should not be held in high regard and influence people’s ways of life. In the end we are all human the only race that matters. History is the worst thing we can teach especially now that we are discovering much of history is false.. much excluded or embellished to a reason only goverment know. We fight eachother discriminate against eachother for what? We all live love laugh and play.. we all enjoy same sports shows music comedys.. we all have family values. We all have people that give us a bad name.. most is created by our government enforced by our government.. but as we are now learning there is a government above our goverment with every intrest we fight eachother they feed on it.. and we have not dissapointed them it’s a shame really. I no longer wish to be part of human race please aliens take me person can’t change the world it will take us all to do that united we stand divided well you see what that’s doing to us

  • Carolina Sander

    Go and hang out with someone who really care. Discover this new Fake sonogram videos that will truly break out in some fun and laughter. this is from fake a baby.

  • Perfidious Albion

    There are always a small percentage of every race who prefer `outsiders`: its what makes for genetic change and helps a 3% part of evolution. I mean, its not like we can all marry our brothers and sisters. Sociologically though, when the inter-breeding rate goes too high, there is tension, then war. …. Only a ChimpOut type would disagree that if 10 middle-aged White or Asian guys went to Central Africa and did a porn-movie with a handful of legal-teenage African girls, and tried to hire African black males to video it, then the Whites or Asians would be murdered immediately or within the hour; but in the spirit of equality (the other way around), that doesn`t happen in Japan, Asia, Europe or Russia, or the USA etc,…… Yet. ….. We can all hope for equality?

  • Busted

    OH Please. Only the most ignorant minds think that the color of skin makes a male apendage larger or smaller. You have to be as ignorant as a lot of these post. I myself a white man in his 30’s have dated predominately black women (amongst other races) my whole life. This is a lot. I do not act black nor listen to rap or Rand B. Still I am who I am and thats what a black woman has always wanted.
    I have played sports and have been in the marines. Men see each other in locker rooms all the time. NO RACE is bigger than the other, some guys in all race are bigger than others. How stupid is anyone to believe otherwise due to skin pigment …really???
    White men don’t act black, many black girls have told me that if they liked that they would date a black man, be yourself. Never have I had a issue.

  • Esther Wamaitha

    A good person is a good person regardless of race. My dad and brother who are black have proven that all my life. The best guy I have ever dated and got married to is white. What does that prove? That anyone can be good or bad. The two guys that shocked me with their. Meanness were both black. Does that mean all black men are bad? No! The biggest conman/mooch I ever met was white. Once again judge someone by character never race. You can miss out on meeting so many wonderful humanbeings.

  • Monica

    You say that I’m Slavery days the white men took what they wanted I.E the “black woman” raped and impregnated black women but where was the black man???? Where was he to protect his black woman??? Stand up for his black women?? Black man stood and watched his black wife get raped so that’s why black women date white men because black man abandoned his black woman a long time ago when he was busy banging out massa’s white wife which is why black men have evolved into ganster gang bangers and promote nothing but white women in their music videos they ain’t premoting their own.

  • SamyyCiao

    Jail for you hater is right around the corner if you are not there you fat trailer trash!

  • ria0991

    This article is 50 years outdated.It needs to be taken down. Progressive black women will date anyone who the want without regards to anyones feelings. Black men have been doing this for decades. They only create babies with black women to keep the black race going but will marry and live off a white woman for the rest of their lives and eventually leave them on welfare as well This article is 50 years outdated.

  • White guy

    I love black women

  • Holy Smokes

    This is nonsense. I went on a date with a black girl from my acting class. She had no manners, had no job, was terrible at texting, was pretty dumb, constantly brought up race… I did NOT want a second date and she was close to tears when I told her.

  • Yelsewh

    This is an old article but I’ll weigh in anyway. I’m a white man. Imho the reason that you don’t see more white male – black female couples is that most white men simply aren’t attracted to black women. In my own case I’d estimate that I find less than 20% of black women attractive and even if she looks like Gabrielle Union she probably isn’t worth the hassle I’d get from my family, her family, friends, strangers, etc. Why bother when I have no problem getting plenty of white, Asian, and Latina women anyway?

  • sd

    white girls are way more racist

  • Mark Weaver

    Are they serious?? It is white guys that don’t date black women. In fact NOBODY (not even black men) dates black women and that is the reason 70% are single. Not just unmarried but SINGLE. They have the highest obesity rates, the most children by multiple men out of wedlock, many are living in poverty and most are masculine and tough. This is a racist article meant to lift the confidence of black women at the expense of white men. Imagine an article titled: ‘Reasons Why White Men Don’t Date Black Women’. It would be accurate, but racist.

  • boboadobo

    black women really really like white men and find them attractive and want to date them….the issue is that not a lot of white men approach black women. it is the way it is.

  • ja

    Coping. Not once did article mention white guys don’t hit on black women as being a big reason.

  • sara

    This is a really stupid, racist article. not to mention that it isn’t true. I say date whomever makes you happy. Race should have no art in it.

  • BaldBird

    Hmmmm… I love ALL women. There are FINE women in all races. Sadly no woman of any color finds me attractive 🙁

  • Renee

    Are you kidding me? Do black women still think this way? I am currently in an interracial relationship. I have dated outside my race for years. White guys love black women…I mean looove black women. Free yourselves sisters, go and explore your options. Find an interracial dating site. You will not be disappointed.

  • Frederick Nance

    Over the years, i’ve seen Black women who are married to men of different races. Black women like White, Latino and Asian men. I’ve dated Asian and Latin women as well as Black women. So, it’s a matter of taste.

  • garyjminter

    I like the message of this article, but perhaps the author needs to talk to some younger women. If she does, she will hear comments like, “I only date white guys,” and “I usually date white guys.” Younger people seem to have lost the racist hangups of the older generation, and date anyone they want, regardless of race, religion, or anything else. People who are intelligent, sophisticated and well-educated tend to be more open to dating a wider variety of human beings than just the ones in their neighborhood.
    Of course, I suspect lots of my “close personal friends” will date anybody who flashes $19-$55 in their face! Andrew Jackson, Ben Franklin, Ulysses S. Grant were all white guys, weren’t they? And the girls I know all seem to LOVE those guys!

  • Layla

    I am tired and sick about why black women don’t date white men! Also I am tired of arrogance of white men they think all black women want them! White men are not only men in this world! I don’t understand! Why black women when dating outside their race dating white men, seems to have been created by a racist system which black women are prey exclusive only to white men!
    This is not that other men don’t want to date black women because there is a system behind it!
    The truth white men have always been obsessed with black women!My husband is Asian and I have noticed that many white men look bad me and my husband, just because I married an Asian man!
    I don’t find white men physically attractive and I don’t like them, it does not mean that because just the major of black females dating them all black women want stay with white men!

  • Ashley Downey

    I think article is stupid, I prefer to date white, Hispanic, or biracial guys over black guys

  • Collin H Haughton

    This is why Black women only wants black men:

    Black men are more physical in their needs than black women.
    Black women are more spiritual and I don’t mean in a religious connotation
    (She is drawn to the energy resonate by the black men) she is also every
    emotional, she as more alpha female personality than any other female groups, hence
    she subconsciously requires an alpha male to give her that feeling of security
    and safety someone with a take charge personality (respectfully dominant) .

    Intimacy is not a physical thing for her it is an exchange, (surrendering herself to male frequency counterpart) of energy between the two. Black men just like black women as an etheric
    connection with each other and nature, the feel of satisfaction ( On all
    levels) she gets being with her hue is not the same when try’s someone without
    melanin. She yearns for this connection and subconsciously only respect that
    energy .

    Very few whites have that Alpha personality they are also missing that energetic rhythmic resonance of their personality that black men embody,
    it’s the way they walk, the way they talk with confidence, the energy and
    security she feels when the black man is around. If the male does not hold these
    qualities her Alpha female personality will take charge.

    There are a few black women who can be intimate just for the
    physical desires, however when they do they will feel
    something is missing. Blacks in general do things with emotions, conviction, compassion and connection this is why when we are upset we are really upset.(move over and get out of the way)

    She is loyal to back men not because she wants to, she is loyal because
    subconsciously, spiritual and emotionally only her hue makes her feel the way I
    described. There are some who date or married outside of their hue for financial
    and social privileges, however there is avoid.

    If a black men understands how black women are govern, he
    would not have issues with her, however he is quick to jump to the path of
    obedience without deserving it. If you stimulate a black woman spirituality,
    mentally, emotionally and you resonate the Alpha male frequency she would
    submit subconsciously without knowing she is doing so. Black women must also
    understand there is a globally agenda to emasculate black men for the last 600
    years. ,..

  • Collin H Haughton

    Race is a social construct it does not exist. We are all the same race just different shades. White, Spanish, Indian, Mexican, Italian, Chinese, Japanese, there are not races, but ethnic groups, tribes, Countries and languages. It is a recessive traits which cause lack of melanin. Different Race ( Species) cannot pro create together. Straight hair is a recessive trait, just like Blue eyes and
    white skin, Keep in mind that everyone with browns eyes also have blue eyes,
    once the brown pigmentation is removed. Curly hair follicles are flat and straight
    hair follicles are round, some black people produce round hair follicles,
    however flat hair follicles are dominant.
    Human hair comes with all sorts of colors, textures and shapes. Notably,
    African hair is more coiled and dry, however this varies from tribes, every
    tribe in Africa have different genetic traits
    ; Asian hair is straighter and thicker, however there are indigenous
    Asians with curly hair; and Caucasian hair is somewhere in between with around
    45% having straight hair, 40% having wavy hair, and 15% having curly hair.
    These variations are determined by many genes and genetic polymorphisms in combination
    with environmental factors (and not in the least by hair stylists!). At this
    point there is much more that we don’t know than what we do know.

    It has been long established that curly hair is a dominant
    trait in Negros or Caucasian and
    straight hair is recessive. This means two things: 1) if a person carries one
    allele for curly hair and another for straight hair, this person will have
    curly hair; 2) curly hair is a simple trait and is most likely determined by
    one single gene. However, a single gene has yet to be found to be solely
    responsible for the curly (or straight) hair trait in Caucasians.

    A recent genome wide association scan has found a SNP
    (single nucleotide polymorphism) called rs11803731 in the TCHH gene which
    accounts for about 6% of hair curliness. The TCHH gene encodes a protein called
    trichohyalin, which is known to be expressed at high levels in hair follicles
    and has been shown to be involved in the cross-linking of the keratin filaments
    found in hair. The ancestral allele of this SNP (the A-allele) is present in
    the worldwide population. Sometime during human history, a mutation lead to the
    emergence of the T-allele (called the derived allele in Fig. 1A). The T-allele
    causes an amino acid to change from leucine to methionine at position 790 of
    the TCHH gene. The function of this change is not clear. Nevertheless,
    Caucasians carrying the T-allele are more likely to have straight hair (about
    70%) than those without the T-allele (about 50%) [1]. From this we can infer
    that curly hair is the ancestral trait while straight hair evolved much later.

    Straight hair is a new trait in human. It
    is associated with the newly emerged alleles in both the TCHH gene and EDAR
    gene. The distributions of these straight hair related alleles support the hypothesis that our human
    ancestors had curly hair; the straight hair found in East Asians and Caucasians
    did not develop independently there are any African tribes with straight hair, wavy hair. Blue eyes and pale skin, these are not evolution, but recessive mutation.

    So what is so good about straight hair? It must provide some
    biological advantage for hair health. It has been observed that oily hair is
    typically straight and that individuals with both curly and oily hair are
    extremely rare. One theory is that the oils secreted into the hair shaft by the
    sebaceous glands can travel down the shaft of straight hair more easily.

    Studies indicate that the G-allele of the SNP rs3827760 in
    the EDAR gene responsible for the East Asian hair type arose during the past
    65,000 years, when early humans were migrating ‘Out of Africa’ into Europe,
    then Asia. During the Ice Age, thicker hair might have been advantageous to
    protect against the cold. The EDAR gene is also involved in skin gland
    function. A study found that increased EDAR activity can cause enlarged skin
    glands (sebaceous glands found in abundance on face and scalp) and enlarged
    eyelid glands (meibomian gland) among other effects. These enhanced gland
    functions, may result in increased skin lubrication/protection and decreased
    evaporation which might have been positively selected during the cold, dry Ice

    • Devin williams

      Race isn’t species, race is a population within a species that is distinct in some way

  • Roger Wilco

    Funny thing..if this was an article that was talking about why white women don’t date black men, you would all be screaming racism. Has nobody explained to you that racism is a two way street? I don’t care what MSNBC tells you, black people can be and are just as racist as white folks. It’s all divide and conquer and we’ll never get over it until we ALL start judging each others as individual human beings, not a shade of crayon.

  • Frank

    I went to high school in the deep south in the late 60’s, early 70’s. I became good friends with a black girl who sat in front of me in English class. I was attracted to her, but never asked her out because in those days you simply didn’t date across racial lines. Times have changed, and I sometimes wonder what it would have been like if I had been bolder and taken a chance.

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  • Ani

    A considerable number of black woman love to “swirl”, and really don’t care what you or anyone else thinks about it. As a black woman who is working on her Masters degree, and afterwards, a PhD, I take offense at the insinuation that Black women are uneducated, as compared to white men. Seriously? Next time, do your homework and stop making generalizations that derive from pre-Millennium/1950’s biased thinking.

  • thelionesswithin

    Number 5 just straight up called black women insecure. Maybe we don’t want to date white men because we just don’t like them. We are “naturally” attracted to black men. Let us do what feels natural to us as individuals and stop this bitter name calling. It’s slide shows like this that try to force opinions about us to us. They try to make it seem like we are missing out on something and I am here to tell you we not. My boyfriend for example has more insecurity and family issues that I have ever witness come out of a single parent black household. Insecurity, in fact all the issues stated above, describes every group of people they try to separate us with. Also blacks marry blacks at a higher percentage than interracial. Do not believe everything you read on the internet. All women and men please be yourself and love yourself. Because the person you are meant to be with no matter their skin color will find you regardless of any of these so called issues above.

  • 1Luv

    Slow form of Genocide, if Blacks keep mixing, soon there won’t be any Blacks.

    • Spear Fish

      Or White’s. We will all be Mocha colored :-).

  • Jason

    My wife is Somali and black. I’m English and white. We’re expecting a baby soon. It hasn’t mattered to either of us or our families, what colour our partner is. It hasn’t mattered to our friends or colleagues. Strangers don’t comment. No one cares or even looks twice at us.

    We went to Djibouti together. Everyone we met there was welcoming and I was accepted into the culture, just like my wife is accepted in England. The Horn of Africa is culturally mixed, with African, European and Arab influences, so they’re very open to outsiders.

    There seem to be big differences in American and English attitudes. Americans turn race and relationships into big issues – the tone of some of the articles on this website seems weirdly overblown to someone living outside the US. In England for the most part, people just meet, fall in love, get on with being together and don’t worry about it.

    If we worry about compatibility it’s often religion rather than race that’s the issue (mainly because most English people are disinterested in religion but other cultures take it more seriously).

    I wonder whether the English legacy of colonialism, so damaging in many ways historically, has actually led us to become more open to romantic relationships with people from other cultures.

    Body image? Plenty of white men don’t fancy skinny. And if they do, there’s a variety of different body shapes amongst black women anyway. Black hair? Not an issue, I speak from experience when I say that the novelty wears off quickly … seriously ridiculous thing to worry about. Not getting asked out by white men? Actuallly it’s very likely to happen somewhere cosmopolitan like London. Educational differences? My wife has done more education and earns more than me, doesn’t matter. Don’t fancy white men? No answer to that!

  • S smoeky

    The media seems to push the black man, white woman thing in commercials , movies , tv etc. I’m guessing it’s has something to do with appealing to a demographic to sell whatever.

  • Anonymous

    I am a white male, and to be honest I prefer to date black woman, I find them very attractive in all aspects of life, that’s why when I seen this article I had to read it.

  • iowachick

    This is the most ridiculous article I’ve read yet, I live in Iowa and I been approached by more white men than blacks. There are more interracial relationships than a little bit around these parts regardless of your skin color it doesn’t matter who you date.

  • uglyasheck

    I am a white male and I flirt all the time with black women and they just don’t pickup on my hints and yes I know its not what they’re use to , but it is hard for me to change but I am trying . I love the curve of their bodies and there lips. I guess i will just have to get more aggressive but that is totally out of my character as I have been taught to be a gentleman and no I am not the submissive type .

  • Sean

    I can’t believe all these derogatory comments about skin color and who’s dating who! Racism is what it’s called and until we all put an end to it…many innocent lives would still have to suffer for it. This is not directed at anyone but your skin color does not make you superior or inferior. It is all down to your self worth, keep your head held up high and don’t listen to anyone’s BS!!

    Who you like or sleep with or have a baby with has nothing to do with skin color. I’m Black, African British and my partner’s Caucasian and having dated others regardless of their skin color, I thought it’s high time I settled down with a good woman with a good heart & qualities that make a relationship thrive. Has nothing to do with her hips, lips and Vajayjay.

    The black men you’re referring to “black men leaving white women with mixed race kids” that’s such an idiotic statement. Have you not seen white single mothers with white kids? Ratio aside skin color has nothing to do with whether a relationship works out or not. Gosh!!!! Do you not have anything between your ears to engage your mind?

    Someone stated below ‘it’s the way you look and not skin color…’ mmm what the hell is that meant to mean? The way you look! You must be very daft!!!! How do you think I look?

    One of my mates is a strong, volumptuous black woman and she’s married to her skinny white guy and they are still very much in love…regardless of their skin color or any critic or cynic. Perhaps ya’ll just inept and very uneducated (I ain’t talking about your degrees). And another got married last year…

    Let’s stop RACISM! It’s worse than a pandemic! It’s damaging to the whole world at large. Be with whomever you fancy the pants off, and if it works out awesome (after you’ve put your bit into the relationship) and if it doesn’t and irreconcilable (remembering the kids you both had) then go your different ways.

    And to that lost soul down there talking about babies like that…damn you!!! Regardless of what any baby looks like a woman had to carry the baby inside her including you for nine months, some earlier and some longer and had to go through childbirth for hours!!!!!!! Some made it through that life threatening day and some didn’t and you dare open your filthy gob uttering those inhumane words…and laugh about it.

    I’m utterly disgusted by all of this.

  • steph

    Is this really a thing? Black women dating white men is quite common in my WV town… my pastor is white and his wife is black, several of my friends are married to or dating white guys… I’ve dated the rainbow myself. I thought it was as common as any other type of couple….

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  • Nick

    “Many studies show that black men prefer woman with curves and white men prefer women who are thin”
    That’s bullsh!t. I am white and I’m a man. I find very attractive ANY woman who is beautiful, and who has voluptuous curves. A pretty pearshaped woman with soft skin wearing a flower dress on a breezey sunny summer day….Mmmmmm…
    For me, when a woman is too scrawny, it doesn’t look healthy. Like she doesn’t eat…or cook(?)

    I also hang pretty low (I think Ron Jeremy is my 3rd uncle or something). I’d ruin a skinny girl. If she’s walking funny after a week, it just ain’t funny anymore.
    I prefer a Real Woman.

  • Erica

    Maybe most of us see our black men as too important to go that route. It’s preserving the race

  • wolf

    wow,i never knew this was going on,,i had a awesome beautiful black girlfriend in college,and we were crazy about each other,but it was the black people who gave her such a hard time about it,that for her sake i had to walk away,,we saw each other a year or so later in a club and she walked up to me and kissed me and said they never gave us a chance did they!

    • Casca

      Same here- and we were attacked by a Black Frat just for her being in the same car with me. You really want to see racism at it’s ugliest, just talk to a black woman with a half white baby- the blacks around them hate them for it !

  • Just Sayin

    This article should read : “Reasons Why Black PEOPLE Don’t Date Whites”. Why would one part of the race be open to other races but not the other half ? It makes it seem like one half of the race works & has some sort of dedication to the race while the other half of the race just dates whoever they want, doesn’t work, and just does whatever they want/whenever they want.

    Black men are poor. Just look how black women (THEIR women) love in poverty no matter what country she loves in. It’s because black don’t provide or work in general. They like to think they are attractive but they’re not that either, sad to say. They make fun of black women’s hair when their own hair looks peppercorn. Poor men with peppercorns.

    What exactly is wrong with white men? They have solid jobs & savings. Their hair is not peppercorn. You can run your hand through their hair without feeling dry, hard peppercorns under your fingertips. White men don’t need you to fight all their battles for them (like black men) because they are real men.

  • Dj

    Funny, I’m dating a white guy and I’m black. I feel its not just a race thing, it’s what you have taste in. I honestly must say, I never really have been attracted to black men.

  • Leo Bloomer

    3 times smarter, 3 times as hard? This isn’t 1960 anymore. Their economic situation has more to do with being single parents. They need to stop being the sole provider and caregiver for their fatherless children. It’s not racist, it’s true for the majority of black women.


    I DISAGREE AS A BLACK WOMAN… I TOTALLY DISAGREE WITH THIS ARTICLE! My friends and I have had this discussion. The REAL REASONS why BLACK WOMEN are not as quick to date / marry white men (as opposed to Black men who can more readily cross color lines are the following:

    1. BLACK WOMEN we think more about FAMILIAL, SOCIAL, CULTURAL, SPIRITUAL and EMOTIONAL aspects of a relationship than BLACK MEN. Honestly. We think about what our children will “have to deal with” we think more about “what we will have to deal with” we think more about what our “relatives will deal with or how they would feel” we think about the uniqueness of “worship” and “social values” that ARE different and differently expressed and experienced across varying nationalities/ethnic groups.

    Every SISTER I asked (friends or associate) say… (similar on par):

    “Girl, if I’m dating or married to a white man and somebody white pisses me off – how in the hell I’m gonna be able to express that to my man?”

    “I mean if I wanna cuss a white person out or speak my mind on something I don’t like that may concern a white person, how am I able to do that? How could I possibly openly and HONESTLY express my views or feelings at that time without possibly hurting my white man?”


    They either wanna be with you OR they don’t.
    And, regardless of color because a MAN IS A MAN he feels
    no matter what he can be protective or prepared to protect
    his woman come what may.


    Lead and “form” his household “into being” or the “direction” he wants to steer it to go when it comes to SOCIAL, SPIRITUAL, FAMILIAL issues.

    So, they don’t get too deep into the “intangibles” of what a RELATIONSHIP / MARRIAGE really means on so many fronts like WOMEN do.

    As WOMEN we have to, because let’s face it…

    When we are dating or especially considering entering into a MARRIAGE we NOT just able to so readily or easily cut off or cut out or cut down on “other ties” that bind us women.

    Especially AS BLACK WOMEN…

    Our families (and sometimes friends too!) tend to hold on tighter to us and expect (even when we’re MARRIED) to maintain almost the same LEVEL OF INVOLVEMENT with them.

    So, a BLACK WOMAN truly has to consider how her PARENTS, OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS, PLACE OF WORSHIP, EVEN HER OWN THOUGHTS come into play when considering marriage (this is true even when she marries BLACK, so how much more weightier the matter if she attempts to marry WHITE or ANOTHER RACE?)


    2. SEX: Let’s face it y’all Brother’s don’t have the “preceding reputation” as MANDINGO for nothing! 🙂

    Most BLACK WOMEN (including myself… being honest) are NOT so sure how a WHITE CAT gets down or can hang (no pun intended) when it comes to bedroom antics!

    And, I am sure there may be some White dudes who CAN THROW DOWN!

    But, again…

    A lot of sisters mentality on the SEX SIDE OF THINGS is this…

    “Girl you KNOW what you got, you DON’T KNOW what you gonna get.”

    So, again…

    Sexually speaking Black women feel more of a sense of “wanting to stay within the race” than Black Men because again…


    For a BLACK MAN (in my most humble opinion) the stakes are NOT as high for him to be sexual with a WHITE WOMAN as they are for a Black Woman to be sexual with a White Man…


    Because let’s face it ALL WOMEN are pretty similar when it comes to just the basic sexual make up and “design” of our lower sexual part. I mean she may KNOW how to move or put the moves on differently or better than the NEXT broad, but at the end of the day a “V” is a “V.”

    But, MEN ARE BUILT VERY DIFFERENTLY EQUIPMENT-WISE. Not all um… well you know the “thoia-thang” is built the SAME nor SAME SIZE nor function at the same aptitude.


    Black Women we look at that (no pun intended 😉 and for this cause I think other races of women LOOK AT THIS TOO! 🙂 And, that’s why BLACK MEN are most favored and “desired” across color lines for women (sexually speaking).

    THE ONLY FACTOR where Black Women say they would consider White Men is the “Economic Factor.”


    But, then, it’s like even if a Black Man is “falling short” in the “economics department.”

    A great deal of Sisters can UNDERSTAND that to a certain extent because we are aware of so many issues that institutionalized racism and post-slavery has had on BLACK MEN and really even on us as well.

    But, when you get beyond simply ECONOMICS to the average BLACK WOMEN money is not enough to outweigh all the other FAMILIAL, SOCIAL, SPIRITUAL, EMOTIONAL and SEXUAL issues that we think about considering a serious relationship (dating) and especially MARRIAGE.



  • Dave Herrington

    This is pretty interesting, I see by how old this article is that I’m a little late to the game here. I always wondered why so few black women were with white guys. When I was in the Marines I saw plenty of black women I would have dated, they just seemed like they didn’t even want to be your friend let alone date them. I did date a L/Cpl that was mixed race and she’d grown up in majority white schools, so maybe that’s why she seemed attainable or not so intimidating. I think that’s the biggest hindrance, most white guys are seriously intimidated by your average black women, that and most guys don’t want the added scrutiny from black guys wanting to know why you’re trying to get with a sister, this was back in the 80’s though, so maybe it’s changed, but it’s still rare to see a black woman with a white guy, unless you’re Nicole Byer.

  • Over Drive

    White men do not want their relationship to turn into a loud, hollering, Jerry Springeresque episode every time a disagreement comes up.

  • Um….

    #4 is really, really untrue. Maybe they don’t approach certain types (hate to put it like that) of black women, but they do approach. Oftentimes, it depends on the environment.

  • Colleen

    I think young, white men in general don’t hit on/approach women. As a white female, there was a point in my life where I was convinced white men weren’t attracted to me, they never hit on me at bars or approached me (aside from the sleazy, I’ll hit on anything with boobs type of guy OR really old men, old men of any race seem to gravitate towards me). I was and have always been consistently approached by black and Hispanic men. Having talked to my white guy friends about this topic, though, most have been attracted to black females but don’t think they would be into white guys–which this article shows to be true. Having a preference and opinion is human nature, but don’t knock it until you try it, I guess. :o)

  • NRGhee

    I’m not single, so won’t be approaching any other women regardless of race, but I have to say that when I was single I would have been less likely to approach a black woman simply because I would have thought she might not be into me because I’m white. So I guess it’s funny, in a way, but sad. There could be a bunch of people out there, totally attracted to one another, but each needlessly afraid that the other won’t be interested because of our race.

  • Jon

    Look, let’s “cut to the chase” regarding this issue! Black men don’t have a preference for white women as stated here, but it’s really all about their personal preference for women of “any race” that carry themselves, and act like “LADIES”, and not the all too usual ghetto drama queens”! That’s the real core issue on the table, that black women can’t wrap around their heads! Until, black women change (DON’T HOLD YOUR BRTEATH)…then nothing will change for black women. Last, the majority of white men in particular don’t date black women either, and aren’t in the least even interested in engaging in that negative process. BW continue to say that they “don’t want no man”, that’s more than okay with black men, because we have moved on to greener pastures. No more negative attitudes, headaches, and drama! We have literally run away from these fake BW that are destroying the black family, and busting their butts “trying”, but failing to measure up to all non-black women’s standards. Fake hair is played out…now what black women?

    • The best black man is a dead 1

      Typical negro male talking about “muh dik” and then bashing his own women. Then here he goes talking for all white men when they are both in separate realities. Once the little negro gets one self-hating black male-worshiping wigger to side with him he thinks this validates all of his opinions and accounts for all whites. The most self-hating negroe tend to be blue-black or coal ashy ones. .

  • JT

    Not even black men want to date black women. Why would white men want to?

    • kooky katt

      As a white woman: White women don’t want white men either! I would rather date a black woman than a white man. You’re all selfish, self serving know it alls. It’s physically IMPOSSIBLE for you to SHUT UP. You think you get to weigh in on EVERYTHING.

  • Tammy

    The #6 was the ONLY TRUE THING. All the rest are FALSE. MOST black women just don’t find white men attractive.
    The main people that compliment our natural hair are actually white, so idk who they are surveying on that, and the main people that LOVE our curves are white (they just aren’t opened about it) and I get approached by white men DAILY, so this is WAY OFF. I did a statistic on women of color (black, latina, asian) and black women by far just didn’t find white men attractive. Had nothing to do with ANYTHING this article is saying. in fact it makes it seem as though black women suffer from such LOW self esteem that we couldn’t possibly get a white man if we desired to. FALSE, so not true.

  • BeeSmart

    Maybe someone forgot masculinity. Many white men are just not “real” men in the sense that they aggressively protect their turf or their women. Many are timid and femininized by political correctness and peer pressure. White men just might be too passive for Black women.

    • Adriannan Nonyo

      Complete bull.

  • mas8baller

    This is based on 6 people’s experiences & views/ opinions? I know several white guys who love curvy women and don’t mind race or religion. I also know several curvy beautiful black woman who date only white or latino men. Two because they were raised in mostly “white” or latino areas of LA and felt outcasted because of it. Now whether anyone else in their spot would feel the same or not I don’t know but I find it a bit hilarious that an article implying to be a broad culture reason for something is really based on only six people. We grow up influenced by our situations & upbringing. If one is raised in a area rich but mostly non white areas, chances are they aren’t going to prefer white. If someone is raised in an area mostly white & latino then chances are they will grow up leaning that way. Chances are they will also grow up with more like traits for those cultures compared to other areas. I’ve dated two beautiful black women, several white, several Asian, one Chinese one Japanese and several latinos which seems to be the way I lean but they were all amazing & different people which I have benefited from the crossing of experiences & cultures even those not always pleasant at the time looking back they’ve all still made me better.

  • gonzomatic

    Wanna know why no one wants black girls? 4 out of 5 of them are OBESE, not fat, OBESE. the other 1/5 aren’t slim by any means, they just aren’t obese. Sorry ladies but you can blame it on this that and those other things but the reality is guys don’t like fat girls, and if a black man has to choose between a loud, in-your-face aggressive black girl over a fat white girl…well…. I guess it doesn’t seem overly complicated to me.

    warning to white girls dating black guys: a lot of them grew up without a father figure, and believe this to be normal. just a heads up

    • danielle

      I’m guessing you’re white, and a previous comment of yours also tells me you’re pretty ignorant. If you don’t want a black girl that’s cool it’s your own preference but you definitely can’t generalize as a whole. Until you’ve met every single one of us from every single continent on planet earth I don’t think your supposed “facts” work in your favor. And you can bring up a stereotype about black men but in the process you’re showing your a**.

      • gonzomatic

        I didn’t make that up you can google it if you so desire, I’m guessing youre an overweight black girl?

        • danielle

          No actually I just so happened to be a normal weight black girl. I have 4 other sisters who also happened to have pretty good bodies as well. Nice try though. I`m guessing you`re white, not in the least bit attractive, and extremely ignorant however the last part is pretty apparent without me having to guess anyway.

          • gonzomatic

            false, i’m actually brad pitt and go to yale and have a 9″ caulk

            • danielle

              Lool in your dreams 🙂

  • Kirt

    Speaking as white guy that has dated many black women. There is nothing wrong with black hair, just wish more women embraced their true natural hair instead of attempting to change it to something its not. Your natural hair is nice as it was naturally created. A black woman figure, well there is nothing wrong with big hips and a backside that that is big, I love them both. But there is a difference between curvy and heavy, regardless of race. Take care of yourself and keep your natural figure fit and you and all men will love it, again regardless of race. When it comes to not finding white men attractive, if you are truly open in your mind you can look at people within any race and see the beauty of certain individuals. Every race has people that look all different, I’m sure someone will suit your tastes.

    All in all… I hope black women will be open to all kinds of men, and as a white man I am always open to beautiful woman that have something worth while to offer.

  • eric

    #4 We don’t want to get shot down. TBH, I’m 40 years old and I have only ever met one black woman who expressed any interest in me

  • baldridge999

    Only a tiny percentage of white men are even interested in dating black women. I’ve only known of two white men who were involved in a serious relationship with a black woman. In both cases, the white men were losers and the black women were attractive enough to have their pick of black men. Go figure.

  • MsCountryGirl

    If a black woman is not feeling a white man why and who has the right to tell her that she is afraid and need to open herself up to the opportunity to date white men? Why is that an opportunity? Why is Black people still breaking their butts trying to infiltrate the white race? Should a black woman open herself up to a Russian or maybe a Slovakian? I am proud of my race and I do not need to evolve by going to another race, especially one that truly do not want you in it. Some people can say what they want to say but I believe in the truth and the truth (as Gator said in Jungle Fever), most Black men get a hen house pet, not a pen house pet when crossing over. My opinion on the White men is they choose a girl that comes from Black money and they clearly do not come from white money. Just my opinion, everyone has one.

  • Simon666

    Nice article (nothing I didn’t already know). White man by the way.

  • This Article Sucks

    The only issue I have with this article is the “Body Image” and “Hair” sections. What you failed to mention is how some black women can’t get pass the history of the white and black races in America. I’m not blaming any white man for his ancestors transgressions; however, the history is too deeply rooted in my psyche for me to cross those lines. Have your racial battle over my ideals.

  • moiraesfate

    Wow, this is racist.

  • Define2

    I can’t believe these extremely racists responses are being moderated.

  • CeeCee Kae

    Another stoooooopid article.. I’m regretting browsing MN today.. I’ve read 2 retarded articles in the past 10 minutes..

  • pola

    this article is soooo dumb. I had white men, one of them actually loves black women the thicker the better..not all men think alike and theres black men that don’t like black curvy women

  • bunburry

    I am a white man and I’ve found myself attracted to several black women over the years. The problem I ran into each time was that black men who knew the black woman in question cam to me and told me to back off, in no uncertain terms. They said that it was wrong for a “sister” to date anyone but a “brother”. When I brought up the fact that they dated white women all the time and that I wasn’t bothered by that, the told me that it was their right to date whoever they wanted. Black women, on the other hand, could only date black men. I don’t know if this comes from an urge to protect black women on their part or if they were just being jerks. Anyway, I stayed away from black women after that. Sadly.

    • cat

      Yes, black men date whomever they will, butt degrade black women who do the same. My ex(who is black) shunned me because he knew that I was attractive to white men, he went on to say how white people are the devil, but he would sleep around eith random white women

  • KnightDWF

    I think it’s a false fear that “black” women worry that a “white” man wouldn’t like her curvacious body. I think they are letting “white” modelling agencies dictate to them what men like. I for one like curvacious bottoms, hips, and breasts. Some men like the more “petite” body frame. We really need to stop thinking in terms of “black” and “white” and think more in terms of flavors and variations. We are all people and we all have our quirks and likes! We are all brothers, sisters, and distant cousins!

  • Scott B

    My only preference in women are the ones that said yes.

  • Dori Ahern

    Why do you folks get into a discussion with this Madame Nore person. It is obviously a troll to say outrageous things to get people excited. We all know the truth and anyone saying what Madame is saying is just trying to push buttons. Shine her on People!

  • Reckoning

    Let’s be real. The number one reason black women should date white men is because they are much more likely to STAY with her and any offspring she may have. It’s time they empowered themselves, and leave all those black men who are insulting their own race by drooling ONLY after white women. Leave those black men in the dust! They are notorious for cheating and eventually going through one woman after another.

    Black women you are beautiful and wonderful and very very reliable and faithful. Never underestimate the power you have to uplift the world and to be some of the very best wives ever!

  • Steve

    I would have thought that the number one reason is that they don’t like our little units

  • Bobbi

    I rather date a cartoon character. At least they won’t judge you.

  • Joe guy

    I am a white man and have tried to date several Black women, a lot of times I get a cold reaction if I let some ladies know I am interested and just figure it’s not their game. as for most of the reason listed in this article. if a white man shows interest in you then he is happy with the figure, hair style and what ever else you think is holding you back from showing interest in him. There have been times I wanted to show interest but didn’t seem to get any signals from her that she was interested too. If you are, give him the extra long look and he may get the hint. some of us are not the best receivers of them too.

  • waynelaboy

    the majority of black men do NOT date white women. much of this article is bull…

  • proudwhite

    Really? I have dated a BLACK woman, and we get along great. MOST Black women PREFER a WHITE man. We treat them a lot better, listen to them, and have more “class”. Don’t hate us.

  • Lisa Anderson

    Based on reading the article, I think the title is grossly incorrect. It should be reasons why white men don’t date black women.

  • TruthSpeaks

    I disagreed with part where some people say Black American women don’t date white men that is generalizing ALL Black American women. Some of the Black celebs who think they know everything do not speak for all of us which included posters/journalists and so on. Go to Europe included Britain and you will see a lot of Black women there dated outside their race and in fact a lot of them married outside their races. This is not with Black women alone but Asian women in Britain dated/married outside their races too. Go to France, Germany and you will see that too. The beauty of google and YouTube, you can get access to see HOW other people really lived in other countries since the media here do not show much of it. We are lucky if we see five percent of it from the media.

  • alan

    have you seen african women give us a break

  • Niku

    Could it be because they’re not asked?

  • Shawn Flynn

    lol Why does it have to be one or the other?? Guys like WOMEN…I would date anyone who caught my eye…

  • RJ K

    Who can say why people of different colors do not approach each other. Laying a blanket statement upon one or the other is no different than racism. If I find a woman who is attractive, I will speak to her. If we speak more often, I would ask her to go out. But I’m not going to deal with a race question in my love life. And for white men to be perceived as “insecure” because they are not pompous, or do not swagger about like Huggy Bear is absurd. That is a failing in the eye of the beholder, not in the man. But then, good girls love bad boys, right? And they get burned by them, over and over and over.

    I would advise my children, who are Italian, not to be involved with a person of color, due to the possibility of bringing a child into this world who has to face all the ugliness and racism out there. Bad enough they have to deal with what they do, after having not asked to be here. And people of mixed race are treated as poorly by one race, as they are the other-so what does that tell you.

    If you want to date a white guy, or a black chick, don’t let fear and racism stop you. It’s ridiculous. Life is a costume party, dress up! You only live it once, so why deprive yourself of love, over ignorance?

    As the author said: ” Love can come in all shades and sizes. Let’s not ever allow stereotypes and judgments determine who we can fall in love with.”

  • Luc

    I’m white caucasian, and never in my life like thin woman. I just cant. Today I’m single, it happend. 🙂

  • Morgan

    This article is stupid and ignorant.

  • donna

    You clearly talked to the WRONG Black women. White men are absolutely interested in Black women and more White men than Black approach me, because I am surrounded by more White men than Black men. My hair is natural, I have curves and I have dated successful White men.

    I have worked with and for White men most of my life and my experience with them has been that they throw you under the bus in a minute to save themselves and I have a hard time believing that they behave differently in their personal lives. Trust keeps me from going forward into a relationship with White men. However, I am hoping to change that.

    Based on my experiences with Black men, they are no prize either, which is why I am a two time loser. In the future when I decide to choose the next Mr. Me, I am going to bypass race and money and choose a human being.

    This article makes Black Women out to be desperate creatures who will accept anything wearing pants. Not true and not me.

    • kooky katt

      So SO TRUE ABOUT THE WORK THING. signed- a white woman.

  • turkey giblets and gravy

    i’m white and i’ve dated several black women..the whole article strikes me as a bit classist, particularly the bit about community and having to be smarter and work harder to be deemed successful, although there may be truth to’s about love and being open-minded, but only give the white guy time of day if he’s good-looking?? hmm..

  • theone23

    i always prefered black girls over any white caucasiens… girls are real hot, but i have to admit that i like the skinnys and they are pretty rare in some areas…..the 20 years old whitney housten (RIP) is the most attractive Girl i´ve ever seen

  • Man

    I can truly say that I am very attracted to black women. I am of Italian/Spanish descent and I don’t know why there are some black women who think we are not attracted to them.

  • John Harvie Garrett

    Could it be it’s because 30% of white men are well endowed while 100% of black men are well endowed?

  • tom56071

    I think black women are just looking for excuses not to date white men

  • ironbarkbill

    Well I for one like dark skin women, I married one & love her. Don’t be shy girls you may miss opportunities because of your unfounded

  • Yoda Ydyxz

    I’ve been in interracial relationship all my life,never seen any problem with black women.But I’ve seen the problem in black men, when me and my girlfriend walk on street,the black men seem to be bitter and their altitude and look change, some of them say some offensive words against us.
    I’m not saying all are the same,but black men tend to hate their women going with non black.They probably feel that “I should have her than him” idea.

  • Quiet Melody

    This is stupid. I have been with a white man for almost 6 years. Closed minded individuals are the only ones worried about what other people think and say instead of finding happiness in or out side your race.

  • Chandra

    I completely understand this article as I have felt it. As a sista who is half black with a full figure, nappy hair, and features close to my dads side, I was reluctant to date white. I actually was reluctant to date at all. My SO is white and has always praised my body and hair. Her little sister expressed that she wants hair like mine and to be my “curly sister”. It feels so good to know that she actually prefers natural black hair! I think more white men just need to step out of their usual zone and give a sista a little love 🙂

  • Dupree

    Why are people blaming black women for the views white men have about them? Are they also to blame for the scientific studies white men put out about them yearly? Are white men worshiped so much by delusional black women that they are not to be blamed for any of their racist, sexist, prejudiced, views towards black women?

    No wonder the likes of Artie Lange feel they can crap on black women and feel black women will laugh at it and accept it because the thirst they see online for any kind of white man makes them comfortable being themselves (racist, sexist, and prejudiced).

  • Dupree

    Simple answer: Because most white men are not interested in black women that way. They don’t make it a secret that among women they rank black women last in looks and femininity. The history of slavery plays a big role in modern day thinking of white men and their views of black women. They don’t believe the descendants of slaves should be put upon any pedestal.

    Now from reading many of the comments on here from black women, they subconsciously agree. They believe black women should approach white men; believe white men find their natural hair and race/skin color more appealing than even they themselves do; believe white men secretly love black women and are just afraid of themselves out of fear of backlash from themselves.

    Quite frankly from the comments it seems black women, are blaming black women for white mens lack of interest, prejudice, sexist, and racist views towards them. They also blame black men and hip-hop music for swaying white mens views about them, as if white mens views were different towards them pre hip-hop music.

    Bottom line is many black women don’t date white men or non black men is because the options are not there for most interested in white men. And as long as they continue to lie to themselves about the real reason, we’ll keep going in this Stockholm Syndrome circle of articles.

  • Venita

    This is very crazy to me. I am married to a white man (my second marriage). The only one that seemed to have a problem with my figure or my hair was my Black ex-husband, and he spent his time chasing white women. My white husband has always been attracted to Black women, he encouraged me to go natural, and he loves Black womens curves. When I was single and would speak to a Black man in passing some of them looked at me as if they were insulted that I spoke to them. My white husband approached me, and pursued and got me. I have nothing against Black men, but some of them look at my afro as if I should be shot for wearing it. It’s just all plain silly to me.

    • Dupree

      “…and he loves Black womens curves.”. Any implication that black men don’t like black women’s curves is absurd. As far as black women’s hair, the reason so many many adopted to the long, straight hair weaves and wigs was because white men said that black women’s natural hair was dirty, wild and unkempt, for the work place and otherwise.

      But for some reason you attribute that self-image hate not to the white controlled media, or white men’s view in general, but to black men. That’s disingenuous and a flat out lie. But whatever justifies your white men fetish.

      • Venita

        I don’t have a white man fetish, I notice that you didn’t mention my ex Black husbands white woman fetish…..which he has. I have Black brothers at least one of them only dates white women. I do love my Black mens natural look, I have Black sons and they wear their hair natural. In other words I don’t have a problem with Black men. Whatever

  • bernician

    Number 4 is a nonsense reason. Why is it the duty of white men to approach black women? Its not the 1950s where the big rich man has to woo the poor little girl out of her daddy’s house. Its supposed to be a mutual thing. Women can approach guys

    • Dupree

      “…Why is it the duty of white men to approach black women?” Why is it the duty of any man to approach black women? Shouldn’t black women approach them like you feel black women should approach white men?

      The fact that white men approach black women the least is a sign of a lack of genuine interest. See men, regardless of race, approach women they are interested in. But you don’t think that should apply to white men/black women interactions. Interesting.

  • Aaron Barr

    As a white man who dated a black woman for 4 years through college, some of these reasons make sense, some not so much.
    1 – Body image – While there will always be individuals out there who won’t find certain body types attractive, I never was turned off by black women’s bodies nor were the bulk of the white guys I know.

  • Craig D. Casimir

    who the hell said black women don’t date white men?? bunch of BS

  • Sophia Hamilton-Brown

    It is not true the majority black men marry outside of their ethnic group. The percentage is higher than any other group but it is not the majority.

  • Ryan Curtis

    Having wide hips doesn’t mean you are fat. Being fat means you are fat. There is a big, and easily detectable, difference between bone structure and cladding.

  • candi

    I’m a 34 year-old black woman who’s ALWAYS been attracted to white men! I’m engaged to a wonderful white guy who isn’t ashamed to be with me! He took me to meet his mother 3 weeks after dating! We’re deeply in love, and trust me he’s been attracted to me from the start!

  • lavasca

    This is not statistically significant unless I misread it. If there were only 6 women surveyed this data is insignificant. Hopefully I misread it and it was more like 4,000 of 6,000. Hopefully the book also uses secondary research information to get a valid tesult on that stat. We know nothing about the six women other than that they are black. We don’t know where they live or grew up or what they do for a living or education levels ot how many generations in the US.

  • reachingthepopulace

    this article was bull from the very first point of body image it made. “black women are known to be naturally curvaceous”. are you kidding me??? this is stereotypical bull wrought on by ignorance of a writer who doesnt understande shite about how the world really is. how about i take you to almost any part of africa and i promise you most the people you see will not have much meat on them. size has to do with diet and health. and here in america lots of people are plain fat.

  • cistiana

    I can not understand why a black woman should always be obliged to give an appointment to a man who is to be exactly be “white? ”
    When I came to London the thing that struck me was the multiculturalism that there is here!
    Sorry for a black woman can not have other preferences, just because the majority of black women from dating white men?
    I only regret that mixed couples are always white and blacks! For example, I don’t feel attracted to Caucasian men.
    I am Brazilian, I find most attractive men from South America, Middle East or Asia.
    I do not feel attraction for the classic man with fair skin and blue eyes!
    I married an Asian Pakistani man, for me my husband is much nicer than Caucasians men!
    In fact, the first thing that impressed me him was his beautiful dark eyes and also the fact that he came from a country like Asia which I find one of the most beautiful places!
    One thing I wanted to say about Afro hair, women who feel shame for the fact that you have afro hair. They are embarrassing themselves!
    If nature has given you the classic hair of a lion, because hope to have straight hair?
    The afro hair especially when they are long they are beautiful!
    Because we live in a society based on a system made ​​by the whites, we are bombarded with images of white models with straight hair just because it is synonymous with elegance and order?
    The port afro hair because that is the nature that represents me! Black women should claim their rights to wear their hair natural and do not feel ashamed!!
    Why suffer putting acid products that kill our hairs?
    To conclude my comments, in the world there are only men as ” white men ”, there are black women who have decided to marry men of other cultures and are happy! I would be pleased if it were also to other types of unions!

  • Smdh

    Nothing can shatter your opinion of the human race faster than scrolling through this comments section.

  • Wtf

    Statistically black men still by far marry black women. They’re not “all with white women.” Time to stop telling that lie.

  • disqus_cwf871uy7e

    I can’t even read any more of your posts because they are so blatantly racist and self-absorbed. You act like you are the authority on all black people, but you also have no factual basis for any of your statements. I bet all the black people you know hate you, and all your white friends laugh at you, assuming you’d allow white people to befriend you.

  • Woody20164

    What a bunch of racist, unscientific hooey. You interviewed 6 women and can speak so broadly? As I and my black girlfriend sit reading this, we both find it ludicrous and stereotypical crap. It seems to be attitudes like this that perpetuate racial discord.

    The biggest thing that separates us is cultural issues. I don’t date white women into country music, and I don’t like what my kids (one is mixed race) listen to. My girlfriend and I share many many things in common and the color of our skin was irrelevant. Those who pigeon-hole others are the people with the problems.

  • Charles Hackley

    More media BS. Black women do not date white men, not out of feeling inferior, but because WM are more often pompous, self entitled, and overly curious of black women. I believe that they are using the media to grow this agenda. “If we put it out there that they are inferior to us, they will attempt to prove us wrong.” I’ve noticed more BW dating WM on TV than I would see in two years of real life. The truth is, BW just don’t find WM that attractive. The majority of BM are in shape compared to their white counterparts. I’ve found that the BW that do date WM, do so for financial security, often forsaking family ties. So, get out of here and quit trying to push that BS agenda. It was only 50 years ago that BM & W were being hosed down and told to get to the back and, “You can’t eat here.” I guess the media has determined that we should forget this.

    • Aaron Barr

      You do realize that you saying WM are often more pompous, self-entitled etc. is about the same as me saying that black men are often more thuggish, right?

    • lareyna

      Good answer.

  • Kenn

    They obviously interviewed the samr type of black women (i.e. low self-esteem) because they basically said the same thing I am not go enough for a white man. However, videos and articles mostly always hear some black women say the same crap about black men, I can’t find a black man on my professional level that is a bunch of BS. The woman just can’t keep her mouth shut long enough to find a brother on her level or take a break in berating the man.

  • frannie walkley

    Perhaps these black ladies should come to Canada, where many white men, heck, just men in general would appreciate them, insecurities and all.

  • Clyde Nicholas

    this is stupid

  • Tyrone Lewis

    Lots of black women won’t date me because they say I am too dark

  • Amber Daniels

    In society I am considered “white” because of how light my skin color is, but technically I am not. No I am not a black woman, and no I have never been discriminated against by a white person. That being said, reading this article disappointed me. Even though very well written, it lack research. Only asking 6 women their thoughts is not a fair pool of opinions to come up and say that “all” black women feel this way.

    My second complaint is that white men have been stereotyped into a very shallow category. Granted there are some really shallow white men, but I think that can be said about all of the races of men.

    Now with that out of the way. I have dated all across the board, the man I fell in love with just happens to be a white man. I am a curvy woman. Always have been. My sister that is like a tooth pick was always compared to me and I was told that I was fat. I am not fat, I am curvy and just a bit larger than she is. I am beautiful the way that I am and I like me this way. And my white husband and every other guy that dated me (no matter the race) loved my curves. Every white man that I dated wanted curves. Not all white me like curves, after all my sister is married and he thinks she hung the moon….

    As for the hair thing. Some white women have REALLY curly hair as well. Two of my
    cousins have really curly hair and has struggled with it their entire lives. Again, white men have fallen in love with them.

    I can’t say anything about what a woman is attracted to physically, mainly because it was never the looks for me, but the attitude. If a man can carry himself with a certain attitude that exudes confidence, that is what I like, But to each her own.

    As for the other topics, I am sorry, honey, but that is just lack of self-confidence. Men have looked at me and been turned off by the way I look, but then turn around and completely change their minds once they see my confidence in how I am. They may, to a certain extent, care about looks and maybe even money, but when it comes down to it, a strong man needs a strong woman.

    My girlfriends that are black and are proud of who and what they are can get any man they want. I have always seen a strong power behind my black girlfriends and that is one thing that I love and admire most about them. Don’t let anyone tell you that you are not good enough. If they give some lame excuse about your hair, looks or whatever, blow them off. They are not good enough for you, no matter WHAT color they are. Black, white, or purple, no one has a right to make you feel less than you are. Unless YOU give them that right. Be proud of your curves, your hair, your color and who you are.

    You are good enough for whomever you are attracted to, but YOU have to believe that yourself first before anyone else will.

    Blessin’s to ya, ladies.

    • a storm

      you just said that you look white…so of course your experience in this area isnt going to be the same as a lot of black women…..but i agree about only asking 6 women whos ages, body types, education etc are not specified is not going to render an accurate result.

  • Guest

    I don’t mean to intrude, but I am a curvy white woman, and all the white men I have known in my life like my curves. There are VERY few white men that like skinny women, not matter the color. Don’t get me wrong, some don’t like me, but my curves is one of the reason my hubby took notice. I have been told that black people don’t want to be stereotyped, what do you think your doing here? How is what you are doing any better than what white women do? Blessin’s to ya!

  • jelost

    This story is silly and makes no sense. I live in a racist city and have been approached by lots of white men and i don’t feel like my hair,education, body image, act… holds me back. Hint: ask my husband. This story is written by someone that guessed a lot of this sh$#t.

  • Jennifer Wilson

    Wow. I’m a white woman who just happened to read this article. How insulting to black woman. It’s telling them they’re fat, bad hair, and poor with no education so white men won’t choose them. Why are you reading these articles, black women? I think I would get another magazine. Wow.

  • Uh, okay

    I stopped altogether at #4.
    Whoever wrote this has obviously never dated a white man or even talked to one outside of work or some kind of business, thus the article. But the things that were listed are things that I’ve encountered white men not caring about AT ALL. And to say they don’t approach black women…wonder why they approach me all the time, then. But if you live in a more liberal – or at least not racially-tense – area, and you don’t act like Bon Qui Qui, then there’s a big chance that you will be approached. Not all white men are ignorant and expect you to act like a stereotypical black woman and thus stay away, many of them just see you as another person.

  • kamel

    the black woman are smarter than the black man . the black man with the white girl for him it’s a sign of success ( behind most of every great black man there is a white girl ) , the white girl go with the black for security reason , we notice in the uk most of the white girls with the black men are thick . most of the black men in the uk are thick . we often hear black people saying to a black guy who go to the university ( are you doing the white guy ) and last they say if you live round the black people you don’t need a safe for your money just hide theme in the books

  • Kwane Jackson

    “We are naturally attracted to black men but the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race. ” That’s a lie. According to the last census on 10% of black men married someone other than a black women. Bossip, please get your facts straight! Are you purposefully trying to misinform black women? Black women, please be suspicious of a site that doesn’t have it’s facts straight. I’m starting to think this site is ran by the CIA to negatively affect our community’s ego!

  • Rez08

    I really don’t see what the big issue is concerning why Black women don’t date outside their “race”! For heaven’s sake, if you are attracted to someone with a different complexion than yours, date them if he/she is available! I think we (I am a Black woman) spend so much time pondering the what ifs to the point of exhaustion and many times are left alone because of this strange pondering.
    I met and fell in love with a Mexican-American man and I married him! We just celebrated our 27th wedding anniversary and life is so good! We always felt the problem some people think exists when the “races” co-mingle is not ours, but theirs, to deal with. Live, love and enjoy the good people who bring you happiness! Peace.

  • Fred Ricardo

    Ever notice. First thing a black man will do when he makes money… buy a white girl. At least Louis Farrakhan and I agree that the black birds should not mate with a Robin.

    It’s always the white girl with the black man, is it because black men find black woman ugly? This interracial mingling has gotten out of hand. When Europeans were building cities, monuments and churches, blacks were still running around jungles living in trees.

    What do black women think of this? Maybe blacks should figure out why over 70% of black babies are born out of wedlock.

  • Craig D. Casimir

    so much racism in this post and serious lack of intelligence on the author’s part

    • Fred Ricardo

      Blacks have become the problem for themselves. Maybe blacks should figure out why over 70% of black babies are borne out of wedlock. What about physical differences beyond skin color, Hair, nose, lips. Look at all the reality shows with black woman and you see them with the hair extensions trying to look white. Ever notice. First thing a black man will do when he makes money… buy a white girl. At least Louis Farrakhan and I agree that the black birds should not mate with a Robin. Our civilization is degenerating with urban kids failing school and talking Ebonics.

      • Craig D. Casimir

        more ignorance… what you’re doing is just lumping all the blacks together… there are black men and women in perfectly stable relationships both within their race and outside. i don’t look at reality shows- they’re insulting to the eyes. and yea a lot of black women (not all) wear extensions and wigs and maybe they are trying to imitate the white woman… but that’s because society on a whole is indoctrinated to think like that. asians the world over (again, not all) undergo double eyelid surgery and thin their nose to get that western look. Society on a whole is rapidly degenerating- it’s not only the fault of the blacks. and why bring up physical differences? (skin colour, hair, nose, lips.) Every race has their features- it’s natural. but if you’re paying that much attention to reality shows and louis farrakhan, then you’re not focusing on the right things.

  • Carl

    The writer forgot to mention that White men don’t want to date, God forbid marry! black monkeys… and they want their children to be attractive – that means without monkey-like features

  • ZindziZenani

    Ok, I’m sorry, but I think its odd to report the “findings” of a “survey” without any explanation of who they survey respondents were or how many of them participated. Were these just your friends? Did y’all do this one Friday night over cocktails?

    It surely sounds like it. That would explain why you said most Black men “now and days” (I’m guessing you meant nowadays) date and marry outside their race. That simply isn’t true. Most Black men marry within their race. Please don’t try and make opinions (uninformed ones at that) sound like scientific findings.

  • BeenthereB4

    IMHO I don’t date black men because I have not had one positive experience from dating black men. No matter what age or level of education I have not had great relationships. I decided to only date outside my race and have not been disappointed. When I have dated a white men, Hispanic mean, Greek men and Asian men, I have had positive experiences with men of other races. When we decided not to date anymore or that we did not have chemistry we just went our separate ways-no drama. After a break up (it has been my experience) Black men want to tear black women down and go on a smear campaign and tell lies and are really b*tchy. I will never date another black man in my lifetime.

    • Wtf

      Sorry but the common denominator there is you. Perhaps there’s another explanation.

  • Jimi

    HOLY CRAP! The author of this article would benefit greatly from writing lessons. I doubt that she had this sent to editing, or even proofread, before posting it to the internet.

    I found the author’s viewpoint very narrow minded, especially with concern to her presentation of proper conclusions she had arrived at by simply talking with her friends. It is one thing for the author to assume, without any presentation of evidence what so ever, that white men are less likely to find a black woman attractive because of hair, body type, or economic class; it is another issue entirely to suggest that the majority of a specific race and gender are attracted to that counterpart ( black man/ black woman ) more so than any other.

    My favorite part of this article was on the last page. There, the author claims that black women are less attracted to white men because white men aren’t as attractive or confident (swag) as black men. I was also not surprised at all when the author exclaims that she and all other black women are due exactly what they desire in a man, removing all subtlety completely that had been hinted at earlier in the article.

    This all leads to the conclusion that the author believes she is owed the proper black man of her choosing, and that “ will come to ” her. Hopefully the author has read this comment and this next sentence turns a light bulb on in her head.

    I’m a white man. I’m a middle class man. I like natural black hair and permed black hair. I LOVE curves. I am tall, strong, and confident as f*$#&. Black chicks dig my swag. I’m a democrat (i know you didn’t mention that, but you should have because republican white dudes and black chicks are ultra rare). All that being said, the NUMBER ONE TURN OFF of many black women is how masculine and aggressive they are. I would say many black women could use a dose of humility, but that is usually out of the question. Even you have a major sense of life entitlement for no apparent reason at all. Black women turn away white men when they act aggressively publicly ( to support that statement I will use some data collected very similarly to you… I have talked to other white male peers).

    Bottom line- Want the guy? Then act like a lady. (gentle, patient, and kind)

  • Molon Labe

    300 pounds of adipose tissue in purple yoga pants just doesn’t arouse me for some reason.
    I guess “dat be raycist.”

  • Steven Hamilton-Healey

    Sorry, have to disagree here. Where I live in London there are more black women with white men than there are black women with black men. Its an American thing, a nation founded on the genocide of one race of people and the enslavement of another. Racism is part of what it means to be American.

    • lareyna

      Thank you.

  • J Spurlock

    “Reasons Why Black Women Don’t Date White Men…”
    Except , of course, for the millions that do date (and Marry) White men.

  • Syd Goatcabin

    Here’s a clue….who wants to date someone who easily gets all emotional and shoots off her mouth and can’t drive a car worth a damn?!

  • Pingback: Black And White Dating Jokes | Dating Around Me()

  • Ashanti

    This article is the most bogus, outdated piece of material I have ever read. First, we are loving our hair seeing as at least 65% of BW have gone natural now. Also, that leads into ALL the white men that are NOW coming on to us more than ever. I didn’t even bother to read the rest…smh!

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  • Winner

    I think you should date and marry whoever respects you and makes you happy. I no longer date black men because of MY previous experiences. This is a choice I have made and I am happy with. As an adult everyone has the right to make their own choices.


    eek! at all these damn comments!!! love who loves you, its 2014…no one cuuuurrrr!

  • atpcliff

    No. do NOT follow this authors advice and see if a white guy comes up to you. If you see a guy you like (any colour), then approach him and see what happens. My black GF approached me…that is how we got together. She was fantastic, and we never would have been together if she had not approached me.

  • atpcliff

    Who cares if you are not approached? If you are woman, and want a man…and you see a guy you might like, then approach him and start up a conversation. A LOT of guys are shy, and probably the better guys for LTR/marriage tend to be more shy. GO FOR IT!!!

  • John Dennis

    Good article.. First of all, I’m White and I have SWAG . It’s a quiet confidence . Most white men , I think do not like to draw attention to themselves in obvious ways . We prefer a “smooth” approach. I think some white men do not approach Black women because they see Black women with mostly black men and they think their advances wouldn’t be welcome .-Sounds silly, but it’s true. AS far as 4 in 6 black women saying that they don’t aren’t attracted to or prefer black men , it’s probably not true . I think when you put someone on the spot like that , the person is going to give what they think is the “right” answer.

    • Carl

      Swag is a euphemism for posturing bulls h i t

      • John Dennis

        Its not dumbass . It’s just slang for “confidence” Don’t youevery use slang ?

      • John Dennis

        You’re an idiot.

  • Dorothy

    I’ve married and dated a black man and a white man. I’ve also dated other races, Hispanic, Asian, Asian/French. The relationships had the same rewards and issues. I do not enter a relationship based on race. Personality, good character, having things in common are some of the things that attract me to another person. I believe in the brotherhood of man.

  • max

    Maybe the reason black women aren’t dating white men is because white men don’t WANT to date them. Look around. Would you date some of these loud mouth, mean and ill groomed black women? Hell no. White men also don’t want blacks in their family lineage. You can call me racist if you like; I’m just calling it like I see it. Entirely MY perspective and you have your own. Deal with it.

  • jv

    this is BS. There are huge numbers of black people including women who make way more money! Look at sports

  • Tonya

    Everyone has some sort of insecurity; no matter what race or gender they are. There are no perfect men nor women in this world. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I am AA woman and live in the south. I have noticed that there are as many white men as there are black, who are attracted to me. At first, I thought that mostly black men were attracted to me but I am very observant an have noticed a significant increase of white men checking me out. Perhaps because white men in the south are coming out the fox hole now; in regards to black women.

  • no.9

    So…you interviewed six very insecure black women then. I’m a navy brat and my parents were stationed in areas that just so happened to have a VERY small amount of black people. I never grew up with more than ten black people in my school and that didn’t change until freshman year of college. Boys of every race approached me growing up and black guys (most of them) couldn’t be bothered with me because they were chasing girls of other races. About the hair thing, I love my hair and wear it as is…but I do wear clip ins. White guys aren’t even the least bit put off by this, especially because clip ins are more common among all races. These girl’s opinions are quite embarassing and they make it seem as though they don’t think they’re good enough for other people or something. I don’t care what color you are as long as you have good character, INTELLIGENCE, and being attractive doesn’t hurt.

  • MsT-mac

    I’ve never read an article I could disagree with more than this one.

    The number one reason that the Black women I have ever known gave for not dating white is for historical reasons – the fact that we were once raped at will by White men; number two — Black women find Black men more attractive.

    All this insecure crap is for the birds. There have been studies conducted that prove that Black women and girls are a lot more comfortable with their bodies than Whites.

    I also disagree with the whole “white men never hit on me” thing. It surely depends on where you live — in Ferguson, Missouri probably not so much. In Chicago? All the time.

  • Loreen71

    It’s really sad and unfortunate to hear some black brothers and sisters on this page tearing each other down. I come across this subject many times, and wonder why there is this need by black women (and indeed also black men) to even broach this subject. It’s very rare to see forums where White people post about why they date ‘the other’, it always seems to be black people with this issue and the need to justify why they date outside their race. I as a black female have nothing wrong with interracial dating/marriage, as I believe, you live once, and who ever makes you happy, then go for it, there is no point being miserable and worrying about what others think, because whilst you are losing out on happiness, they are enjoying their lives, with no solution for yours ( i.e. they are not going out their way to find you a good black man or woman). With that said, there is a difference between keeping your options open, and so happening to find love with someone outside your race, than specifically going out to look to date outside your race because of your hatred and disappointment with your own. No race is perfect, and the solution is not to turn to the ‘other’ to remedy your heart as this could turn out to be more damaging emotionally if it does not work out. Further to this, also, as much as we would like to believe love conquers all, unfortunately just love alone in an interracial committed relationship cannot solely bind. I say this, because there are challenges that come with mixed relationships (specifically black and white), one needs to be able to connect our past history with the current power dynamics within society to understand this. Unfortunately there is too much history in the conflict between Black and White race ( as much as people may think it’s a thing of the past), and that legacy still lives on today and is embedded in racist society. I am not talking about racial prejudice ( as this is ignorant stereotyping and pre-judgment made by one race against another, but racism i.e. when power and control is used by people in positions of authority ( i.e. white people) to oppress another race .e.g. police, criminal justice system, media, education system etc). The reality is, black people do not hold power (wealth but not power – noteven in African nations), the power is held by white majority who control the institution that our society is made up (as named above) and through this oppress black people and other minority ethnic groups) The reality is this is part of our world is not going to go away, and still very much alive ( although maybe not as evident and as aggressive as maybe 30 years ago). So the challenge is for people who do end up in interracial relationship is to not compromise themselves in order to fit in i.e. ignoring who they are, cultural and social issues etc. Black poeple can fall into the trap of forget themselves and where they come from, as it makes it easier to handle the relationship. E.g. Would a black woman be able to speak openly about racism in the criminal justice system, education system, police force, amongst her white partner and a room full of other white people at a dinner party, no she probably would choose not to broach the subject of fear being view as a black woman with a chip on her shoulder, or not being heard or understood. But given the same senario with a black partner and a group of black people, she would not have to think twice and instead of feeling ‘muted’, conversation would likely to flow aturally, there in itself is an example of compromising. Therefore, although morally there is not an issue with black and white interracial dating/relationships, politically there are challenges, and black brothers and sisters would need to have a very strong liberal minded white partner and circle of friends, in order achieve and maintain an honest relationship.

  • JMcosta

    I am a black man from UK and I tell you what, when you black women are devalued
    because you do not attractive to some white men, come on!!
    You have identity problems…

    I really see many white women attracted to black men like me. If black men prefer white
    women, I tell you what!

    This has to do with the interests of white women by black men, and that media always
    stereotyped the white woman as synonymous with beauty, but it does not exist
    because women who are used to seeing in magazines usually are phtoshop product. Some Indian women, Asian, Black Women are even more beautiful than white women or

    Anyway, black woman should not detract in any way. Not wanting to devalue any race,
    black women have beauty yes, yes she has!! What in the black woman is
    voluptuous, in white woman is flabby.

    The white woman has many physical attributes and advantages that is true but also the
    black woman has.

    So, black women, do yourself favor, glorifies more your attributes!

  • Northman56

    This just seems crazy to me. In my life, I have been attracted to women of every color. It isn’t the “color” that keeps us apart. It is culture. People of different races being unwilling to open their horizons to look outside of their cultures to see the beauty that is out there. You see it here on this comment page with several of the black women responders who are obviously hung-up on #5. And that mindset does exist, in all races. People are naturally attracted to people who are similar to themselves. It’s biology. But, that doesn’t mean that intelligent people cannot overcome that natural instinct. It all comes down to what is in your heart and your head. My very first “girlfriend” was a little cute black girl in Kindergarten. I came home and told my parents. And I got my first lesson in “culture”. I could see the embarrassment in my folks faces. They did not rant and rave about black people or mixing of the races or anything overt. But, I could tell that something was “wrong”. Of course, being 5 years old, my “romance” with the little black girl only lasted a day or two anyway(I don’t really remember). But what I am saying is that while there is a natural biological component to being attracted to someone “like you”, there is also a strong cultural component that you “learn” as you grow up inside of your culture. IMO, calling it RACIST is way too harsh, and despite what is promoted in the media, etc. it exists in ALL cultures, including the Black American culture. But, it CAN be overcome if people are willing to allow it.

  • Doc’ur Rhodes

    Well I don’t have a problem with it……been married to and dated black women all my adult life…..I know all about the hair issues and “thick” works for me. My kids are dark and I love all their friends. So maybe I’m strange but I don’t see an issue here black is beautiful and all my white family and friends spend a ton of time tanning or trying to be black!

  • Dan Slezak

    Black Women are the lowest creatures on the sexual food chain. In this horrible dating culture that we have today, its not just black men opting out. Its all of us.

    • wtf

      That doesn’t even make sense.

      Go back in your hole, troll.

  • Candy Girl

    This was interesting. Would this only apply to Americans? Does social status or income level have any correlation/area of being raised? I would love to see a study done across the globe especially in Europe. I’m seeing a Caucasian male from Europe. I am considered black and I wear my natural hair and he loves it. I was always shy about it especially if I lied down and had flat sides. He would say silly things like I love your wild lady hair. It seems it’s a lot of mixing there as well. I’m solely going off of what I have observed so I don’t know for sure. And as far as natural hair goes…you can still play with it. He’ll wrap his fingers around it or pull on curls to see how far they stretch. I don’t focus on race, but I have been nervous since I live in the south especially the comments I hear from both sides. I have a biracial father so it never bothered me. I’ve been attracted to a wide range of races. It’s unfortunate it’s still an issue. My favorite quote about this issue is actually from a Martin episode…”We all black once the lights go out” -Cole lol

  • dzhugashvili

    As a white male, I agree with the comment that no. 5 should actually be the entire reason. I am one of those evil 1%ers, and I break no mirrors, but I have never seen a US black woman express any interest beyond me paying for dinner. Fortunately, outside the US there are NO problems.

  • Niku

    I was going to add a comment, but I soon saw that it was both fairly complete and brutally honest, except for point no. 5. That point is hard to believe.

  • tortor

    I am so tired of hearing that White people have more opportunity and are likely to be more successful based off the color of their skin. Do you people not realize that this is reverse racism. To all those young white people who have struggled with working two jobs to be able to afford themselves the chance to a higher education, I do not want to hear that someone who is black has had to work harder. Both blacks and whites must face challenges and bumps in the road on their way to success but if it happens to be that whites stick it out on a more common basis then that is what determines the success rates and chance for opportunities. YOU, my friend come across as the racist as you are downgrading the hard work and sacrifices that must be given in order for white people to achieve success. How about the Obama children? Are you going to tell me that they do not have guaranteed opportunities for success? It is all about who you know in this country and being that America is made up of the majority being white people, that is your answer to why White people seem to have more opportunity. Open up your minds people and stop making everything about race. it is a cheap and old excuse, use the opportunities that blacks have gained with equalization and prove to us why you should have always been equals to whites instead of complaining out that energy into good use!

  • John Doe

    Manicmechanic71 you had the most accurate comment

  • collin43789

    I just want to say reason number 5 should actually be reason 1-5, from my experience as a white man.

  • amondieyy

    lol guess i should look for a white dude ! lol

  • Lband baldwin

    I am 3 years late on this article, nevertheless I am deeply steamed. I could have picked 6 black women that would have given you a totally different article. However, it would not have been written, because it would not have added to the self deprecating image the media loves to give black women. There is insecurity in every race and there are some women that no man could make them feel as if they were not good enough for them. Beauty is confidence and a peace with G-d that surpasses the defamatory of negativity of the black woman, and creates an aura of self acceptance and grace. I am a black woman and a dark one at that…I am 5’11 and carry my height with the grace G-D created me for. I have all races of men attracted to me and I have never encountered a man that I did not feel like he should treat me like the queen I am and I do not believe in the stink attitude that is constantly be portrayed of us to receive it. I treat men the way I want to be treated and carry myself with the respect that says I will accept nothing else or you can keep it moving. There are a lot of classy black women STOP looking for the insecure ones to speak for us. Give our young women an image of confident black women let the balance show. Stop always showing the negative without the positive to balance it out. There are a lot of men of other races attracted to black women and we are dating them.

  • WolfNippleChips

    I always thought it was because of the soap.

  • Sam Cro

    What about cultural differences? Are you about to celebrate Kwanzaa? Maybe blacks should figure out why over 70% of black babies are borne out of wedlock. What about physical differences beyond skin color, Hair, nose, lips. Look at all the reality shows with black woman and you see them with the hair extensions trying to look white. Ever notice. First thing a black man will do when he makes money… buy a white girl. At least Louis Farrakhan and I agree that the black birds should not mate with a Robin. Our civilization is degenerating with urban kids failing school and talking Ebonics.

    • Wtf

      Lol! You are posting the same comment over and over with a different name each time.


    Don’t be angry…

  • Kashta

    Ok so what statistics show that the majority of black men marry outside of their race? Im very curious.

  • T.J.

    Where are the black and white senior citizen couples? Are they on youtube? I don’t see them in the streets

  • boyd

    same reason white women don’t date Asian men

  • Steve

    Besides the hair you forgot to mention the nose.The hair and the nose are 2 deal breakers for this white guy.

  • gert

    Of all the reasons listed, mine is #5. I have been approached, given the “eye”, asked to dance and “can I get coffee for you” at meetings by white men but I AM NOT INTERESTED!!!! I admit that I think about the past a lot and, even, about the ideas that whiyte men are supposed to hsave about u so I do not want a white man to touch me nor come hear me and he could be a wonderful man but . not for me. None of the other reaons are of concern for me. I not afraid of people’s opinions because I can handle myself. . Funny thing is that my sister had a dream about the most wonderful, provide more for me and respect me man for me….. yes… a white man! I asked her if she was crazy!

  • BealeStreet

    I think this article and resulting conversation are missing context. Historically black men were forbidden to even look at white women while, conversely, black women were often there for the taking by white men. While this may have resulted in black men forever chasing the forbidden fruit, another result has been the black woman’s inherent distrust of white me and and their motives. I think American black men HAVE turned away from their own women who, often to their own detriment, persist in trying to love them rather than deal with a white man whose perception of black women may be based on negative stereotypes that are hundreds of years old and are alive and well today and some of which are promulgated by black men. Black women struggle to redefine themselves and the concept of beauty to appeal to black men who do not see the beauty in their own women, because they have lost the beauty in their own souls. I don’t think black women are afraid to date white men; they simply haven’t given up on their own men. Yet. Maybe it’s time they did.

    • Lee

      So well stated. Black women should expand their horizons and date outside their race. It is true that physical features hold some power over black women, primarily hair and curves but these challenges are not insurmountable. Black women who desire families and children don’t need to resort to the world of baby mama hood which is symptomatic of black men who cannot commit to being fathers or husbands. I’m not saying it’s black men’s fault, but they are partly responsible for this sad phenomenon.
      Black men have their issues too with black women. Some of the most negative comments about black women come from black men themselves. One common complaint is that black women want too much and getting an education and a job are classified as wanting too much. They complain black women want a man with an NFLer income when they just want the guy to be responsible. Lots of mudslinging all around and that’s how disjointed it is out there.

  • Crabbie Offman

    White guys are usually much more attracted to black women than they let on. Mostly because black women have a reputation for being very strong, self-possessed, no-bull, and not easily impressed. Also, black ladies are more accustomed to black guys’ flirting style (as whites perceive it) which is usually pretty forward, kinda macho, and very, very self-confident! White guys, especially those of us who are more reserved & introverted, feel like we couldn’t compete with the guys who got the “swagger” down.

    Any black ladies who are open to dating white men in general, or one guy in particular, should maybe just let your defenses down just a little. If you seem friendly & approachable, friendly men will approach. And don’t be afraid to make the first move if you wanna get the ball rollin’.

  • klark

    This article is full of stereotypes. If written by a white person the author would be in litigation right now. The article makes no mention of the real reason, the perceieved “shortcomings” of white males down south.

  • Josh

    “Unfortunately black women have the smallest pool to choose from “.

    Guuurl, you haven’t got a clue in the world.


    Gay men

  • Define2

    This entire article is foreign to me. Never had any attraction to white guys except a minor crush on entertainers as a teen. In real life though I have never had an interest. IMO they are simply too different. I’ve never had any problem attracting black men so no pity party for me.

  • zoesonn

    gotta tell ya..most white men fear successful women. And many don’t care what the woman does for a living as long as she is sexually attractive to them. Just my opinion.

    • Aaron Barr

      Gotta tell ya.. that’s the type of commentary that just makes white guys laugh. And disregard complaints about racism.

  • bootyliscious

    This article is total B.S. Grow some balls be confident in yourself approach them if youre interested dont wait for someone to approach you. This is a new century take your happiness into your own hand. Power of the booty. What man doesnt like booty!?!?

  • AnonGirl

    I loved this article! It was really fascinating! However, the fact that only six women were interviewed and the poor use of grammar really disappointed me.

  • What a World

    I think a lot of us miss the point, I think we should be picky about who we want to be with. If that’s a black man, yay!!! We should also be picky about who that black man is and what he brings to the table. Everyone has insecurities, they’re a lie if that say they don’t. Society made sure we had ours from the ‘Middle passage’ saga. Having said that, knowing that our marriage numbers, pregnancy, good jobs, high school/college graduations, employment numbers, wealth status, etc. are down, what makes you think dating (not marrying) outside of our race is going to make our lives any better? Isn’t that the real issue, how do we make our lives better? Dating and making babies outside of our race will not make any of the other issues go away. And more to the point, none of these professional consultants ever say ‘get married to someone outside of your race,’ because those numbers are dismal too. We have to learn to appreciate and work with what we have.

  • DEMO_WM88

    It’s ashame such an interesting article which makes valid and interesting points has had the discussion diverted to an exchange of responses that actually don’t disucss the topic at all.
    Some people are pro interracial dating, neutral or anti for different reasons. I try to stay fairly open minded and believe if people were more open about why they dated particular people it would leave a lot less to the imagination. I have been apporached by men that are not the same race as me and it throws me off every time and makes me feel uncomfortable. For me the main thing is to figure out why I feel so uncomfortable and whether I am just cynical about men in general or more so of men other races.

  • Jim Davis

    This is hilarious. Black women don’t date white men? It’s white men that are not interested in dating most black women. Voluptuous? You mean obese.

  • Your Name Here

    I’ve met many nice very cool black women. But also many chip on their shoulder ones also. Sometimes the level of agressiveness comes off as anger.

  • Mike Smith

    I’m a white male and I’ve pretty much only dated black women since I was 17. Most of the guys I know (white and black) love thick girls with big butts and I’ve only ever been turned down for a date by one girl and she was the type that was die-hard black culture, wearing an Africa pendant and red, black, and green all the time.

    I’m currently married to a beautiful black woman and our life is good. I think too many people make too big an issue of race. I have more education and job skills than my wife, but I’ve also helped her enroll into college and support her 100%, like a good partner would. I can understand peoples insecurities, but body type? hair? education? these are all trivial and most good men don’t care about things like this!

  • MrsMommy

    And what White Planet did the person who wrote this piece come from? She went above and beyond giving white people the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval. I’m surprised she didn’t list a national suicide number for those who simply can’t cope with being black or having the social “stigma” of never having been romantically or sexually approached by a white person ever.

  • Brendan

    As the product of an interracial marriage I must say kudos! 6 whole people you ‘surveyed’ how scientific of you.

  • Jay

    Bravo. Good plot to get everyone stirred up. There is no one size fits all. These mega generalizations are laughable. GOod show though! (grabs popcorn)

  • Brittney

    I’m not insecure when it comes to dating white men, I just want them to understand and accept that my hair is different. My body type is different and I’m okay with that. Also, I get lots of looks from white men, but they never say anything to me. Makes me wonder if they would be in a serious relationship with a black woman or if they would try to keep her behind closed doors. If I found a good white guy, I would have no problem dating him.

    • Northman56

      Many “white guys” that give you “looks” may indeed be attracted to you. They likely do not say anything to you because they do not get any “positive feedback” from you. And in today’s world they may actually be afraid to say anything to you, especially in a work environment, because you might just accuse them of sexual harassment. And how easy it would be to take on the “offended” attitude of “How dare they” approach a black woman. You see, there are “fears” on both sides. I can assure you it has nothing to do with “trying to keep her behind closed doors.” A beautiful black woman by my side would NOT be anything to be ashamed of or try to keep hidden. Of course, my wife probably would have a problem with it!

    • Mr. Miz

      I dated a black woman who was starting to grow out dreds when we started dating. I’m half-Italian half-German with straight, brown hair so the whole dreds thing was a novel concept for me. As was finding out about her hair breaking, being asked to tear her dreds apart and a few other things. That said, you shouldn’t worry about your hair, its different and might seem novel for a bit but very, very few white guys would end a relationship over it.

  • Manicmechanic71

    White guys don’t approach black women because we can see that you’re not interested. Every comment in this article has basically said “put up with the ugly white man for financial and emotional security” We don’t want that relationship anymore than you. I’m a white man andI find women of any race attractive, an attractive, interesting woman is a treasure no matter where her forefathers came from. In 43 years I’ve only ever had two black ladies intimate any interest in me and I’m not considered bad looking locally. Unfortunately I was in a relationship both times so had to let them know I wasn’t available.
    Lots of white guys find black women’s curves desirable and their full lips and almond eyes very pretty too. Keep positive girls! Please don’t date us as second best and”good providers” though, it’s really not fair.

  • colorant

    It is such an interesting topic and one that I have often talked about with many of my female black friends (both in the UK where I am from and also America). Some of the things I have heard from my friends as what they feel others perceive (not necessarily fact) include the following:

    There are strong stereotypes that girls from the black community are too strong willed

    Large portions of black girls are too urban and ‘ghetto’ so it is hard to relate to without feeling like a Black ‘wannabe’.

    There are tough things to navigate in a relationship anyway, but balancing ‘cultural’ interracial factors (family, community and fear of immersement/participation in it)

    Black women (more so than black men) are almost synonymous with slogans like ‘Black is beautiful’ which engenders perceptions that Black Women just aren’t interested in other races.

    From a personal point of view, this article is interesting in it’s viewpoint of how ‘white’ men as opposed to races see black women. Being neither black nor white myself, but growing up in the UK as a third generation Asian (I guess you guys in America would call me ‘Indian’ though my family aren’t from India, but from that region), I have always felt that my own community have had challenges due to religious, cultural (Black culture of course is distinct but much more compatible with ‘Western White’ culture than say from the Indian/sub continent). I think the black community have achieved a great level of integration with the white community and has carved a valued and valuable area within it (Music, food, media, movie icons etc). Whereas the Indian/sub-continent is little more than joke figures in large.
    I wonder if Black Women are so associated with an established sub community which itself is an extension of an established wider community that makes it difficult for them to be approached without having to take on the whole sub-community? I say this as oppose to lets say other female races who are non-white within predominantly white societies (like the UK for example) who are still seen as an ‘ethnic group’ as opposed to ‘established extension of a community’ and therefore may appeal for reasons of ‘exoticness’.

    • MrsMommy

      In America, it all depends on what area of the U.S. you are talking about. Some parts are very much mired in racism as passed down by their colonial forebears, and some parts, such as Miami and the West Coast, are very interracial because of a much broader and diverse community. White men have no problems approaching Black women unless they see themselves as an outlier or racist.

      • Crabbie Offman

        Good comment. I grew up in the midwest where interracial relationships are not unusual at all, but often not accepted by older people of any race. I’ve lived in SoCal since the mid-80s, and it doesn’t seem like race is any barrier at all. Not to say there aren’t a few haters out there, but we just ignore those idiots. Personally, I’d like to see America’s “race issues” just let go of… everybody just love who you love and your kids will be that much more beautiful!

  • jrdobbsjr

    The writer forgot 7) Don’t want to be ostracized as a Race Traitor. Black men especially don’t like YT taking “their” women….which insinuates at some uncomfortable truths about why some of them date white women.

    • Mr. Miz

      That’s the truth; I found out what the word ‘coalburner’ means from my college girlfriend who told me about the rough time her hair dresser and some (former) friends.

  • Nikki

    As a black woman married to a white man this is ignorant as hell, love doesn’t have a color. If it’s your preference not to date outside your race fine but you are putting a limit on finding the right guy based on color. My husband praises my natural hair and appreciates my curvy body. Also my husband is an outstanding father to his child and partner to me = great character -which can’t be said for a lot of men out there.

  • Jack Danial

    Everyone should just make babies with another race.. Soon we will all be a tan color no issues no race issues

    • Crabbie Offman

      Right on, Jack!

    • Northman56

      Bingo! You win the prize of common sense!

  • Daxx Vondrachen

    Oh crap !!!! all this time My ID says I’m Caucasian …I must be black I love the junk in the trunk, hooters, big legs tight skirt….but a lot of them have chips on their shoulders, possibly from racism and not hung like a black guy so If I flirt I just tell them they are hot and I’m the white devil Farrakhan warned them about. The ebonics and ghetto speak are a turnoff also which eliminates another percentage, On the flip side, a larger percentage have a more vibrant faith base than white women, but that’s just a thing important to me

  • noneya

    Man, the ignorance on here is overwhelming. I see it’s not just white folks that are racist @$$holes…

    • Northman56

      You are correct. It definitely goes both ways, despite what the race hustlers would have you believe!

  • RobertSGrant

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  • Bruce Aiken

    I find many ‘black’ women very attractive in many ways, but my experience is they have a strong odour which prevents me really wanting to build a relationship with them. Perhaps white men also produce an odour these women do not like?

    • Run


    • Your Name Here

      Haha. Do they “produce” it or is it the coco?

    • Northman56

      Odor? “Watch you talkin’ about, Willis?” As a “white guy”, I must say that this is a ridiculous statement. My white son often has an odor but that is because he won’t take a damned shower! Women smell GOOD! Black, White, Yellow, Red, or GREEN if they come in that color! Always liked that green woman on the old Start Trek! Never got to smell her though. 🙂

    • LALALA


  • Esther

    I’m been approached by white men before. I was 11th grade when I remember it first happened to me. I remember what he said to me, “Your beautiful by the way.” My face was priceless. lol.

    • Run

      Your face should be “priceless” when anyone complimens you.

      Did receiving this compliment from a white man sonehow affect you more profoundly simply because it came from a white man?

      Was THAT the ultimate validation for you, or something?

      If so, I would suggest tha you get counseling, because you have some deep-seeded insecurities resulting from years of racism.

      It’s more common than you think; it’s the reason so many black men and Asian women date white women and white men, respectively. They seek validation from their ability to snag whites.

      • Wtf

        Damn…all she did was say a man (who happened to be white) complimented her and she was flattered.

        And you respond with an angry diatribe about how she needs to get counseling for her issues.

        I think you need to take your own advice.

  • Natasha

    Black and yellow, red and white
    They’re all precious in His sight
    Jesus loves the little children of the world

  • guest

    I’ve only ever dated white men, and last I checked I was still a black woman. *sigh*

  • clvie

    I am a White male married to an African (congolese) women. I love her differences
    (curves, hair, blackness, culture, etc.) which does not mean I have a problem
    with White women. I find Black women most attractive. And I am sure I am not
    the only one…

    • Rob Turenne

      I personally have never had an opportunity to hook up with a black woman because where I live there isn’t many. However I had herd that Black women tend to have wider vagina’s then white women or Asian. Of course I am not saying all but going by averages.

      • Run

        See…right there we have a problem. You’re the type of white man who would only want to stick! You don’t see a woman, you see a s3x object that you can use to satisfy your fantasies.

        My sistas deserve better. What they should do is open themselves up to More Hispanic and Asian men. Hispanic men often have tastes that mirror those of black men, and they therefore love black women!

        I have also met lots of non-European whites (like Saudis) who are arteacted to black women. On top of that, they are very PAID!

        Why is it that when black women discuss IR dating they always talk in terms of the European “Biff”? IMO, they are the least deserving of a black woman’s affections…case-in-point being YOUR POST, which is emblematic of the way most white men view black women.

        Like I said, they deserve better than a “hook-up”!


      • fran beard

        commonly assumed by whom? national idiot society?

  • dave

    like a rapper on a white woman

  • janet

    Has anyone watched Impractical Jokers on TruTV? Two of the stars, Brian “Q” Quinn and James “Murr” Murray, are dating black women. Quinn is dating the shows make up girl and she is a beautiful half black, half white girl. Then again, both men are pushing 40 and it’s like a cougar thing.

  • BlackPrideWhoMad ?

    People went way off topic this about why Black women don’t date white men & I have to say this article is stereotypical and complete BS, based more off of opinion than anything! I am a Black women from Minnesota , I get approached my white quite frequently, I don’t have any of the insecurities stated above about dating a white man I.e body type , hair etc the only factual one up there is because I just don’t want to. Most to me are not attractive at all and white people because of their privilege will never understand the Black experience ! Even if they tried. Plus majority of the time they’ll have racist parents , & I definitely won’t deal with that or trying to educate anyone’s family about my people, nope!

    • dave

      white privilege? please… lose the crutch

      • Run

        …and there’s BlackPrideWhoMad’s proof!

        You don’t even understand the inherent advantages you were born with and benefit from every day, for no reason other than your skin color!

        She’s 100% correct.

        Most black women are not attracted to white men – and when they are it’s certainly not the way they are attracted to black men – and they know that most white men lack the depth of character required to date a black woman seriously.

        That’s hard for white men to accept, because in their delusions they are the most beautiful men walking the Earth, and they have been brainwashed into believing that whites are morally better than all people of color.

        They truly don’t understand why any woman would find Denzel to be more attractive than Kevin Costner.

        They truly believe that Brad Pitt is better-looking than Morris Chestnut or Boris Kodjoe.

        And they prove every day that they cannot try on a different perspective if it requires admitting that white Americans are still benefitting from one of the largest crimes ever committed against humanity.

        • dave


          • Run

            Yawning back. Whites are so undeserving of the things they have, and it will all come crashing down sooner than you think. Your arrogance is incredible.

            It’s only a matter of time.

            • dave

              ditto you fking loser on a crutch

              • Run

                Eat a diq!

            • jrdobbsjr

              What’s ironic is you probably vote Democrat….and they have opened the gates to Latin America to replace you as a special interest. Good luck trying to use “white guilt” on Mexicans and other Latin Americans.

        • jrdobbsjr

          Yup….not ready to give up the crutch. Probably never will be, either. Failure is easier to cope with when you have the Other to blame for it.

    • Run

      Absolutely perfect post!

  • o_i760rq1m9

    Thanks for all of the effort you put in your article. However I cannot relate to ANY of it. I have not personally ever met a Black Woman who felt that she couldn’t date a White Man. But (then again I’m Bi-racial- Caucasian & Black and have never come across this type of situation). If that’s how Black Women feel, it’s certainly not how Bi-Racial Women (like myself) feel. I’ve never, ever had a problem dating men of other ethnicities.

  • jackie

    Tellin it like it if or some black women – they want children who are lighter than them and have pretty hair so they can stroll them about like trophies – and to legitimize themselves and their low self esteem. And their Momma told them to – for them its worth the trade off to use the guy in the trade off

  • Geoff

    Great!!!! Information is the key to everyone being happier. I have 3 mixed race nieces and everyone wants to straighten their hair! (their grandmother, who takes care of them is white) They are beautiful children and should be allowed to grow up learning all about where they came from and what it means to be a child of white and (BLACK) parents. Let’s get rid of the stereotypes and rejoice in differences.



  • Amelia

    This is the most ridiculous articles I have ever read. Was this written by a caucasian. If not, then the writer really need counseling for low esteem issues and poor body image.

  • Dymond

    you should remove this article. only 6 women surveyed? Come on this is sad. “4 of 6 said white men don’t approach them” but “4/6 aren’t even attracted to them” redo this article with at least 2000 black women surveyed. these 6 are minimal and limiting. I’m a black women and half of my relationships have been with white men. although they are curious about my hair (and if its mine and how of it is mine, and other questions) my curves is what they love. and hello? this is so old look at Kim K. this article seemed to be writing in 1982 rather than in 2012

  • P.

    You know whats really weird as i’m getting older i’m only getting approached by white guys in the uk, i have a typical black body- the boobs, butt and small waist but black guys say i just look like i’d only go out with a ‘Tom’ or ‘Harry’ and i would throw shade at black guys. I don’t get it at all. I have no racial preference either. I wear a long weave, make up every day and always make sure i leave my house well dressed- even if i am heading to the Office. I honestly don’t get it! And i get so much flack from my black male friends for having white boyfriends but honestly decent black only look but never say anything…

  • Dot Von Tese

    I would say number 5 is the only reason for many black women including myself. I signed up on a mostly White dating site. Many white guys were in my in-box every day for the short time that I was there. I checked them out, photos, profiles, lifestyles etc. I tried, but I was forcing myself to commit. I didn’t like most of them. They looked too old for there stated ages. A mess. Most were not attractive, no mutual interest, no clue. I left the site and signed into an all Black site. I am not in anyways attracted to white guys. No feelings towards them at all. Nothing in common. I tried. I don’t fear them. There are multiple white guys that love black women. They are also on the Black sites, It’s their preference. My thoughts to each his own. It’s who you are attracted to. I don’t care.

  • Korbyn Ann

    i understand there may be numbers and statistics, but whoever wrote this was doing a WHOLE lot of generalizing. it actually made me mad because its just so ignorant. we dont date white guys because we dont feel like explaining what weave is? LOL id rather teach a white man about weave and natural hair than getting picked over by a black guy for not being a lightskinned curly haired exotic princess. in some cases its actually easier talking to a white guy because all they see is me. theres no lightskin vs darkskin, good hair vs nappy, attitude vs submissive BS that black guys always complain about. this whole article is stupid.

  • Kristi

    Your conclusion was correct – the women surveyed were quite insecure and judgmental. Your survey was hardly scientific and lacked the number of participants and respondents necessary to obtain valid information. I was quite annoyed reading each point as to why black women don’t date white men. The bottom is confidence, self love and a non judgmental spirit, which some of these women seem to have. With self confidence and an open mind you can meet, date, fall in love with and marry just about anybody who is worthy of your love. Peace out..

  • TM1

    I can’t believe some of these comments that I’ve read that were made by adults! I’m a 16 year old, from Trinidad and Tobago. I’m doing a research paper on the discriminatory attitudes interracial couples face. @disqus_YxsN74zg5E:disqus,You are indeed an ignorant,disgusting human being. All of these “facts” that some of you “claim” to know are just STEREOTYPICAL GARBAGE Individuals should be able to date outside of their race without it being a controversial topic. This is 2014.Please don’t pass this ignorance and racism down to your children. We don’t need this division in the future.

  • vagn

    I think all men like curves and beauty regardless of race. Getting involved is another matter since people generally consider their social status and the prejudice of relatives ect

  • Imjust forposting

    Quierra Davis-Martin, exactly how much were you paid to write this crap?
    I am a Black woman who never has, and never will, date a white man.
    I am very secure in my Blackness, my appeal, my hair, my shape and my education and, yes, have been asked out by white men.
    I refuse because I know of nothing finer than my Brothers.
    I’ve infrequently visited this site..and left each time feeling like I needed a bath.
    This was the final straw.
    As far as your quest to “empower” women…start with yourself.
    BTW, it’s spelled Etiquette, not Etitiquette….smh

    • Teacher

      Have one of those black men you are being loyal too asked you to be their wife… I’m waiting…. Just like over 60 percent of black women you will be a spinster and never married. Open your mind sister and live …. or be by yourself forever…

    • gobnait

      It’s human nature to seek out the company of those who resemble us most closely and who share similar life experiences. It that’s what you’re comfortable with, you don’t need to defend it to anyone.

  • Zulu Queen Anita

    Amen respect to u old timers the black chicks up here who Is promoting white romance don’t even have a clue tell them again !

    • ria0991

      This isn’t 1860!!! I doubt you were old enough Theman!

  • Jayman

    I don’t know where they got the info for this article, but I see black women with white men all the time.

  • Kaz

    I’m a black woman married to a white man. We have known each other since we were 15 been together 14 years. This report is idiotic. My husband loves my curves my hair with or without my weave in. If people are really picking partners based on these superficial circumstances then they should be alone. Love is so much more than what colour you are how thick your thighs are or how much money you make! It must be just USA who have this view because here in England we just get on with things!

  • Scott the Mad

    They usually don’t like dating white men because the amount of time they get to spend together is significantly less than when they date black men. It’s hard to make a relationship work when your man is at work all the time.

    • Bill E. BOBB

      yeah, easy to have time for your girlfriend when you don’t have a job!

  • cadyleena

    === BlackWomenWhiteMen. info === a 100% safe. It is a wonderful dating mecca for black and white singles share their life online! It can help you find your ideal match easily. If you are interested in black women dating white men, white women looking for black men, you have reached the right place

  • talln45

    “…made it no secret their liking to white women…”

    English a second language?

  • Junie

    This Article is Racially Stereotyping blacks. I think they found the 6 women they Surveyed from the inner-city or ghetto. The statistic on education, money, jobs & opportunies is to laugh at. Professional/Middle Class Blacks don’t fall under these bias statistics. It’s a Flat Out LIE that “most” Black men marry outside their Race. WHERE? Most means almost all.

  • Roy Jones

    This article is complete BS. I have dated many black women along with women from various cultures and none of these reasons ever entered my thoughts (or theirs).

  • Chelly

    This is the dumbest, ridiculous most ignorant post I’ve ever seen. I am a size 20 curvy black woman and my man (white) absolutely loves my curves. He honors my body and makes me feel like the sexiest woman on this planet. It is not that white men don’t love us black ladies it’s that people like you reinforce the negative stereotype that black is to black and white is to white. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT! LOVE SEES NO COLOR!

  • Oly

    i’ve been attracted to every other race except black men. They just aren’t attractive. A lot of men, including black men themselves, don’t want to deal with black women because most are just trouble. They are loud and always looking for fights. i wonder if it would have to do something with the long line of bad parenting. Especially the mothers. Degrading the daughters and setting bad examples for their sons. i respect any black woman who has been able to break that chain.

  • RumChocolates2 .

    Racing mixing has been going on since forever. Why do people going back and forth about this in 2014? We are all mixed with something.


    hell black women make better wifes than white women they know how to love a man and be true to him and make him want her more than white do i would love to find a good looking black
    around 25-54

    • Nick

      Too bad black guys will harass a black woman dating a white guy. I just think most black men a jealous……cuz we get all the pretty black chicks……we have jobs, and money, and take care of our women. Not to mention, we try to be faithful as a whole.
      It’s a white thing…you wouldn’t understand.

    • Bill E. BOBB

      ever watch Cheaters or jerry springer?

  • tloliv

    I don’t know where they found the women who were interviewed/surveyed for this article. I am a 40 year-old AA female (from New England area) who has never once questioned whether or not a white male would be attracted to me b/c of my hair, body, etc….My AA friends also have never even mentioned wanting to date white men. I believe this article totally missed the mark and should have taken a larger sample of the population b/f printing this. It could be damaging to younger females by leading them to believe they are not good enough. White men just are not on our radar. Myself and, I would dare to say, all of my college-educated, kind, respectful friends just don’t want to be with a white man. Could they expand their horizons? (I am happily married so not included.) Sure….they may even have to eventually, but let’s be clear…AA women not dating white guys is simply due to a lack of attraction to them romantically (possibly on both sides). We make great co-workers though….no sexual tension….makes for a great team! 🙂

  • Rachel Spencer

    I take issue with this article for a variety of reasons. First and foremost the number of women used for the survey was extremely small making this little more than an opinion piece likely reflective of the personal views of the author. I also take great issue with the idea (expressed more than once in this article) that black women are “naturally” attracted to those within our own race. This idea/argument implies that dating outside of your race is an unnatural behavior.

    This “natural attraction” argument is one that I have run into consistently as a Black woman within the Black community and believe that it is a rather dangerous one. The spreading of such rhetoric only reinforces and spreads this opinion which I have found relies heavily on the stereotypes of behaviors and attributes of persons on both sides of the proverbial fence (Black and White). This manner of thinking without a doubt deters many women from entering an interracial relationship. Also in my experience (Note: IN MY EXPERIENCE), people who hold this belief have generally never had a serious relationship, or any type of relationship with someone outside of their own ethnic group (or perhaps had a negative one…which as “minorities” we should know that the actions of one doesn’t speak to the behaviors of an entire race of people).

    Attraction isn’t simply an innate force uninfluenced by outside factors. A person’s attraction towards another (be it within their own ethnic group our outside of it) is greatly influenced by society at large (for instance the history and current state of race relations within a society), the community you live in (demographics of your community), your socioeconomic status, education, religion, family and family dynamic, friends, and your own personal beliefs.

    I accept that people sometimes truly are not attracted to those that don’t look like them. I accept that it is hard for people to challenge themselves to look at things differently, to challenge long-standing stereotypes about their own ethnic groups and others. However, I also know that there are a lot of people who are not against it yet simply never entertained the idea in relation to themselves, declined to give a person a chance who showed interest, or disallowed themselves to date outside of their race even though they may have wanted to.

    Yes I read the last part of the article (a very “safe” conclusion), which makes the article seem as though it is leaning towards tolerance, acceptance, and freedom to love who you want however, almost everything before that part of the article is really leaning towards the “natural attraction” argument and declines to mention many tendencies that Black men display towards Black women (two examples: not all Black men understand our hair routines and the popular belief among Black men AND Black women is that long/short natural hair is far less desirable than long/short straight hair, also Black men don’t ALL prefer a more voluptuous body type…fat shaming exists in the Black community too as well as the promotion of body certain Black women’s body types that are far from attainable for many.

    Not to be completely rude but I would argue that this article is like a poor high school presentation on smoking. All the facts seem to ring true or are true on some fronts based on a vague knowledge of the subject and are poorly researched and put forth to an audience of peers that basically states cigarettes/interracial relationships aren’t good for or aren’t a good choice for these reasons…BUT you can still smoke/enter or pursue an interracial relationship if you want to. I use the example of smoking because it’s something that while there are many who smoke, many also disapprove of it and feel it’s within their rights to both in private and publicly (sometimes to that person’s face) criticize, make fun of, shame, or demean those that do it.

    For full disclosure I am a Black woman in serious relationship with a White man (and NO I’m NOT only attracted to White men) who I love and who loves me. I am not thin, I do not have a light skin tone, while we’ve been together I have had natural hair, braids, and relaxed hair (hair pins, scarves, hair products, the whole thing). At times we get disapproving looks from strangers (Black and White, depending on the part of town) and on more than several occasions I have heard people talking about us across a room or on the street. I’ve also been chastised and made fun of by members of my own family. It’s not easy. But nothing really is in life. If you love someone you love them and you’ll fight for that love…and love is NATURAL.

  • Stu

    As a white guy I can say that I’ve seen many beautiful black women. Could I fall in love with a black woman? Yes! I think the most important thing in developing a relationship with a black woman would be if our personalities were compatible – do we simply enjoy spending time together. The biggest barrier in developing a serious romantic relationship with a black woman (maybe even marriage) would likely be social acceptance by both side’s family and friends – that, in the end, can make or break a lasting relationship. It’s sad that it has to be that way, but that’s the social reality.

  • Randy

    Brown skinned women are more attractive to me for some reason than light skinned women with the stipulation that they don’t wear their hair in those corn row styles. I also prefer natural which means no paint or perfume or shaving or plucking. A deep south accent is music to my ears. Those are just the physical characteristics that are most attractive in a woman to me, a Caucasoid man. My point being that each has his own preferences and generalizations are worthless in this area. Personality attractiveness is a whole other matter.

  • Angela

    Black women do date white men…..

  • James

    “In the white community this has been the complete opposite. The bigger the butt, the less attractive. If your hips are too wide you’re considered fat. Thinner is usually all around better within the white community. This is naturally engrained in both African American and Caucasian people’s subconscious. Many studies show that black men prefer woman with curves and white men prefer women who are thin ”
    What a bunch of racist crap! I am a white guy, and I LOVE curvaceous women! And plenty of other white guys do, too!

  • teatime

    This is the biggest bunch of bull I have ever read and the idiots below couldnt wait to put their two cents in just to judge. Yall need to just sthu

  • JStokes

    This isn’t true for me, I’ll tell you this right now!

  • Dane555

    “In the black community, we naturally have to work twice as hard and be 3 times smarter to achieve the level of success deemed to be successful. White men that are very successful will usually date a woman who is as successful or at least in the same class as himself. “-

    First of all most ppl want to date someone who is in the same class, as for the “bc we are black we have to work harder and be smarter…” thats just juvenile complaining and frankly racist.

  • GreatKissser

    I’ll chip in my $0.02… as a white man, I have a huge… weakness… for black women.

  • For those black men worried about attacking black women you should be worried about your status in the gene pool. Where once, sexually, you were #1; your deadbeat ways of ditching your children, destroying your credit, and leaving debt has damaged your image. No, white women are going for other ethnic groups. Hell…even hollywoods replacing you on screen with other cultures. Your status is dropping. Get ready for rejection from those black women you didn’t want. They’re not going to hold you down until you can get back up, because past behavior is a great indicator of future behavior. Believe That!

  • I don’t date out and I thoroughly believe the sexiest thing is a black woman with a white man. I’m a trekkie and almost cried when Uhura and Spock were paired. It was genius and so unexpected and I loved it. I don’t date interacially, but I don’t hate interacial dating.

  • Her article should never have been written. The one thing I’ve learned is a man, white or black, knows what he’s getting if he has vision. Do you think he’s surprised when she tells him she’s black? She’s curvacious? Or, about her natural hair? He knows exactly what he’s getting into and what comes with the package.

    This is just another bullshit article to paint Black women as the “other”; not quite “right” The stats are good for black women and white men.
    This is why we need to define ourselves and stop allowing “well-meaning” people define us.

    Sure, white men want us; we don’t always want them and it surprises the hell out of them, because they believe the hype that we’re waiting to be plucked from some desperate single’s tree.

  • emery

    i don’t understand how a survey on 6 PEOPLE can be relevant

  • beowolfe

    Did they ask black women or did they conclude based on statistics what black women think?

  • Carmen

    I’ll lend my voice just this once. What an incredibly ill-written and biased article. How in the world does this site have the reputation it has, what with its sweeping generalizations, affinity for perpetuating stereotypes and knack for outright skirting the TRUTH!? I am an average size (14), black natural haired woman and I just have to say this. I have had many white men approach me during my 28 years. I like to think its bc I’m outgoing, witty, confident, charismatic, and am naturally open to engaging with whomever…no matter if they are polka dot. While I can and will admit that there are some things that may make people hesitate on both sides CULTURALLY and only that, if a person is bold, brave, or curious enough, they WILL step right on over whatever barrier they feel may be in their way. It’s not a black/white issue…it simply boils down to cultural differences for the most part. Growing up, my best friend was and is a white man. He dated women of different ethnicities growing up, but no matter what society tells him or deems appropriate for him, you cannot and will not be able to get him to deny his love for black women. Every chance he could for the past 23 years we’ve known each other, he has never failed to tell me how beautiful, smart, and amazing I am. His favorite thing to say is “You’ve got it. You just do.” His observation and belief has NOTHING to do with what society deems acceptable and everything to do with what he believes. Case in point…love who you love, take a chance in who you want and IGNORE the foolishness that these “articles” perpetuate because I honestly believe they only serve to continue to make people self aware of a reality that does not exist or simply may not exist for them. I can speak personally on that having spent half my life being raised in a predominantly white town and the other half being raised in an all black inner city area.

  • Ryan S

    WOW!!! #3. So many things wrong here. First of all, it’s incredibly common for white men to date below their “Economic Class”. You just spit a bunch of BS out of your mouth with that one. 2nd, You naturally have to 2 to 3 x’s harder to be considered a success? Just who exactly do you have to work harder then? Not me. That line is an insult to whomever your referring to and yourself. If you are saying you have to work harder then someone else, then you aren’t working as hard as you can. I go to work every day and give 100%, from you description, if there isn’t one of those pesky hard working people from another race making you work harder then you only give 25% – 50% of you max effort for your employer. 3rd (same topic as #3) I’m a white guy, from a broken home, brought up 1/4″ above the poverty line but with no rent control or govt asst. I made it out by working as hard as I could. I’ve opened my own business, but I didn’t get any of those nice rewards minorities get for opening their own business. Yes, I truly did it all by myself with no one to back me up but me.
    All that aside, I’m married to a beautiful black women. So any other women reading this, take a step back and forget this chick, she isn’t thinking right about this. Think about attraction for a minute. You know when a guy is into you, right? Right. No different. If a guy isn’t into you, he’s not going share an intimate gaze,if he just wants to F***, he’s gonna be looking like you like a piece of meat. The guys that you know at first look, those are the ones you go after, or let them come after you. All guys may be shy so don’t be afraid to shoot a signal his way that it’s ok to approach. A little smile or moving your hair away from your face while looking at us under your brow, we’ll know.

    Attraction is that, attraction. Not all men like all women. It doesn’t have to be a race thing.

    God, these articles just keep setting us back. Don’t look at people as anything other then what they are. People, of the HUMAN race.

    One last thought for the MN Editor, if you’re an editor for a (somewhat) respected on-line publication, use your brain, you’ve obviously got one. Stop adding fuel to a fire that isn’t burning quite like it use to. Use your power, your platform to bring us together and not create further separation by inserting your selfish thoughts. Study philosophy if you regard yourself a journalist, or if you are a professional journalist, go back and restudy.

  • TJ Milani

    I am a proud Italian American (white) guy.

    I consider myself an attractive guy.
    I have light olive skin and although i am

    obviously no Channing Tatum, i have a nice build.

    One thing i can say is not one single black woman has ever
    shown interest in me throughout my whole entire life.
    I always felt that even IF a black
    woman were interested in me, then she would be ”settling”
    for me because she could not find a black guy.

    ..and really, why would i want to feel second rate and
    ”settled for” when i could date a white
    woman and feel truly wanted?

    Maybe if black women want to know what is going on, they should look
    in the mirror. There is a reason why black men like white women.

    ..and us white men like them, too.

    Think about that.

  • JJ French

    The tile of this article should have read: “Why White Men Don’t Date Black Women”

  • Really

    Im reading most of the comments and it just blows my mind how stupid/ignorant ppl are- but I won’t let racist comments harden my heart an when someone posts a comment that is ignorant please just ignore it don’t respond or even try to enlighten them on why they are wrong because this only adds to the foolishness if they have no one to debate with maybe they will slowly fade out of the topic -FYI I am a black women and I love ALL colors of skin and I KNOW they love me back ! It may not be that white man but it will be the next – it wasn’t that Asian man but it could be the next and so on and so on what one person might not find attractive the next will there is beauty in every race there are good/bad people in every race

  • signofthetimes2

    please there are a lot of brown women who are screwed up,.eg. prostitutes they had sex with anything. you guys really need to stop this liberal thinking of a melting pot especially while other s are playing the race game. i’ve talk to plenty of brown girls who dated are had babies by white guys and the element that’s in common is that white guys tell their daughters not to date brown guys they say “black guys ” and they want them to swear allegiance to the white flag , so be a man

    • Wtf

      Try that again in English, please

  • Kitope

    Even if white men approach the most (i don’t know), I don’t date them simply because i don’t really trust them. I can’t stop thinking that the ones who approach me, just want to try what is like to be with a black girl or just want me for sex. When I’m interested in a white guy I automatically abondon b/c i think he wouldn’t be interested in me b/c i’ve heard so many times that white men don’t like black women, they find us unacttractive, loud, guetto etc. and they only use us for sex so it just block me. I know it’s a big generalization but yeah.. I just can’t trust them..

  • mb

    White men don’t approach black women due to fear of ridicule from the women who may throw a “white boy” at them, and fear of intimidation from black men who may also throw a “white boy” at them. I have multiple male family members (as in a whole handful) that are married to black women. They were just those guys who sucked it up, and decided their ladies were worth the chance.

  • TheHarper

    iv read so many of your articles 2 day and again i need 2 ask where u get this crap from also your site seems very racist as if you are trying to put a wedge between white and black people. Were you always that stupid r where you dropped on your head a few times as a baby .

  • Michaela Dawson

    Oh man who the hell is writing these ridiculous articles that basically resort to stereotypes, to explain why and how black people date interacially. It’s all centered around negative view points and stereotypes of blacks and whites. As a black female reading this, I completely disagree. Specifically, with the way this was written. Garbage.

  • Kamora Herrington

    other than #6, I see these as all issues having to do with self-esteem and internalized hatred.

  • Juniper

    I am mixed raced and my father is white and will only date black women and I’m with a white man and I don’t find any of those issues pertinent to our relationship. Maybe some women find that there are those problems but it’s not the same for everyone.

  • RequiredName

    I dunno about the class thing so much anymore. Lots of white guys are being drummed out of the economics game too.

  • Gabriel

    I am a natural haired, educated, and plus sized African American female. I have absolutely no problem attracting white men, in fact many of them enjoy black women because we are strong minded, eat whatever we want, and no nonsense group of women. This article is designed to make us feel bad about our lots in life. You will not know what another race truly thinks unless you actually see for yourself.

  • Dirk Agia

    I am alright with you not wanting White guys. I also feel that White men have no interest in a fat, loud Black woman who ill fly off the handle at the drop of a hat! Call me what you will but realize that bucks do not date their own kind either.

  • Risse

    Speaking only from personal experience, as I am a young ‘black’ woman who only dates ‘white’ men, I find this to be BS. With the exception of No. 5. Im more curious about who surveyed these women and the complete data collected from this survey. Ps… I am not ‘dissing’ this post as it is rather intriguing.

  • Lol..confidence (swag)! Seriously, WTF is swag? Only boys pretend to have this and only girls mistakenly believe its needed.

    • Jessica Rose Williams

      @oweneff:disqus I agree. If such a thing does exist, it is not exclusive to one
      particular race or culture. Personally I believe that “swag” means
      confidence, and if a guy (regardless of race) is confident enough to
      approach me and there is a mutual attraction I (a black woman) would be
      open to the possibilities!

      • Well said, Jessica – unlike me. I must have had a rough day because I came off sounding like a grump! Happy Friday! =]

        • Jessica Rose Williams

          Thank you sir lolz!!
          What you said was just fine, and you don’t sounds grumpy at all. I hope you have a happy Friday as well!

  • danmcn61

    As a single white man, I have to take issue with a few of the points made in the article. I can only speak for myself though, and yes I am sure there are a lot of white men who will disagree. First of all, black women are very attractive in my opinion. I like “curves” on a woman (think of Marilyn Monroe for example) and a large backside is an asset, not a hindrance. Ditto goes for hair (natural is fine). One thing I don’t like are painted nails (sorry)
    I admit that I am guilty of not approaching black women, and after reading the article I see now that is my fault and I will change my behavior. It is a classic case of two people misunderstanding each other. Black women think that white men are not attracted to them because white men don’t approach them. White men don’t approach black women because they think black women will not be attracted. It’s stupid. Everyone should just go for what they want and be able to take risks.

  • Hello

    One because men, for the most part are the aggressors. So, many white men do not approach black women. A long time ago, things might have changed since then, a white male ( who was my friend at the time) told me he wasn’t attracted to black women because they have weight problems, attitudes and their hair is never groomed to his specifications for instance weave, braids, damaged kinky hair. Yes I am a black female. Yes I really did have a white male friend to tell me this. We ended up parting ways after a while.

  • John Q Governor

    It’s quite simple: The leftists promoted black men to white women, in the name of racial equality. Started in the 1970’s and hit full stride in the 1980’s. The black guys now get more sex, and the black women were left wondering what happened. The leftists don’t promote the advancement of black women.

    • Wtf

      I really hope people leaving comments like this are joking and don’t really believe it . Sad, just sad…

  • Trinigirl

    This article pissed me off tremendously! The only thing I can agree on here (mildly since it’s not a deterrent by any means) is about the hair thing. Super annoyed now this morning. Thanks! grrrr

  • Skye

    I saw this in my email and clicked the link and to be honest I am very sorry that I did. This is utter rubbish! Who says that black women don’t date white men or are afraid to date white men? I guess all these black women who I see walking around with their mixed race kids conceived immaculately….bunch of rubbish and people have the time to be debating this. You fall in love with who you love their race. In fact, I date white men and if I am to compare they have treated me much better than any black man has ever treated me. In fact I know many white men who only date black women. They think we are gorgeous and we have amazing personalities.
    It is strange that this is even up for discussion….what does it really matter? Love is not conditional, love does not have pride, love is sacrificial…so if you fall in love with someone, you do not even notice their race. To be honest this race issue gets too much airplay…it is not that important. It is the least important part of a human being because if I should lose my skin colour, I will be the same person that i am, I will have the same level of education,the same family friends etc etc. My race does not define me…. my individuality and my personality defines who I am and as such I will continue to date whoever rocks my boat because I am a phenomenal woman!!

  • kim

    there is no race apart from the human race people! please stop with this bullshit!



  • Cali_SL

    I live in California. It seems the more successful a Black man is, the less likely he is in a relationship with a Black woman. Then there are the thugs that date the non-Black women looking to date a “Bad Boy”. Even having the audacity to bring these women to the hood to flaunt! Keep that sh*t on their side of town.

    If you’re a Black woman with a high profile career, then you might date outside your race. But for the majority of us, that live normal day to day lives, the dating pool is extremely small. I’ve never been approached by a White or Asian man. And the few Hispanic men that have approached me were obviously curious about getting some Black booty. So the average Black woman has these choices: “Fight” for the left Black men that still acknowledge us, date the very few curious non-Black men or be content being single.

    • The Truth Hurts

      A lot of Black women bring that on themselves though. There’s a general stereotype that Black women are loud, rude, brash, have bad attitudes, and are domineering.

      I get the feeling some Black women are excited to date any White guy. I saw a well-dressed, stylish Black woman in her 20s with an Afro, holding hands with this White dude who looked to be in his late 50s — white hair and hillbilly-looking. It just didn’t match up. More than likely she just wanted to be able to say she dated outside of her race.


    LOL after I read this article, they have a link for 8 REASONS WHY BLACK WOMEN SHOULD DATE A WHITE MAN. It should be titled 8 REASONS WHY BLACK WOMEN DONT DATE BLACK MEN

  • Rjames

    I’ve noticed if a white woman gets within ten inches of a black man, she can no longer speak proper English. Wuss up wit dat?

  • honeymachete

    Reason No. 4 is the Main Reason.
    White men don’t approach black women very much if at all.

    I concur about the UK situation black men in the uk almost always are with white women almost like its the law. I’m not sure what black women in the uk are all meant to do if they want to stay there?
    Black women in the USA have it better, segregation and races living in different neighbourhoods kinda helped y’all in terms of relationships in a way.

    Birmingham and parts of London are the best places to attract a man (especially a black one) in the uk, apart from those places its pretty bleak.
    I suggest that as a black woman if you wanna meet someone you may have to move to places/countries where people are not so racist towards you.

  • JDsHandsomeSon

    Everyone, this story, like most in all the celebrity and culture type publications, are made up by the writers and their “surveys” are fake too. Having known many in this business I can tell you that when things are slow, or for whatever need that arises for a story, writers are ordered to conjure up a theme with bogus participants, fictitious names, and fake situations. I actually helped a girlfriend once some years ago who had to come up with some detail to fill in a general concept she was given by her editor with a prepared conclusion. She and I simply wrote a script to support the conclusion that had been fixed beforehand. In this case the writer was told by the managing editor to build the supporting detail around the conclusion that Black women don’t date white guys, whether that is true or not.

    We’re being played, people.

  • Lind- Ccc

    Natural Black Woman hair is way better natural…
    I have been straightening my hair for several years and now I realize I made a huge mistake… I’m letting it grown but it will take a lot of time.
    I do not think that straightening looks nicer than natural hair… I think is just society problems that thinks our hair is not beautiful or our hair has a problem because we can not make it wave ( swinging) = ( like the commercials) >>> for that we go and straight our hair to be as the commercials…
    However we should “fight” for it, better than “discriminate” by straight it…
    Our hair is nice as the white woman hair… We both are just different and we cannot change it… IT IS : Black Woman cannot change their hair to white people hair AS White Woman cannot change their hair to Black Woman.

    # We all should feel proud of that.

    And about dating, you just date whoever feels attracted to you…

    Relating hair to attraction… – what is the point having a silk fake hair ( that probably a guy would be attracted) and he cannot touch it?

    Is society problems in seen everything that is “bad” comes from Black People. Even the hair.

    • Lind- Ccc

      Btw.. all in this topic… that make sense at all…

  • LeeLeeC

    I have to call some of this B@LL…I am dark skin female, petite, and have natural hair. You know who give me most compliment men of other races…get even more point for NOT being African American. Best line I ever heard, I bet you don’t date white men. Reason why white men or other races won’t date or try to date AFRICAN AMERICAN women, is truly because most of them (WOMEN) like staying with their own kind, and I do too. I would take an ISLAND man over any kind of man any day…but I would not date someone because of race.

    • ObrackBarama

      Don’t worry. No white man wants your venomous vajayjay.

  • Melanie

    Well I have no problems attracting white men and I LOVE them. Black women, if you are interested in a white man, show him that you are interested, smile and make conversation. Your attitude plays a major role in this. Be confident and it will all work out. It did for me, I have a white prince who graduated to a white King, 12 years ago, when he became my husband. Good luck all. white men rock!

  • Missy

    I don’t like topics that generalize groups of people. I’m black and I’ve had no trouble with any type of man. Making a list that explains why black woman and white men don’t usually date is pointless.

    • ObrackBarama

      Except you nigglets really need to not be breeding with pure white humans. It’s like monkeys and humans mating… messes up the gene pool.

      • partypants

        Woah there, calm down Hitler, this isn’t 1941 anymore.

        • ObrackBarama

          Luckily, history repeats. And I’m thinking more along the lines of 1741 instead of 1941.

  • thewlyno

    Black men love full black woman bodies…unless they are an athlete or musician, then it’s “bag dem white chix” all day…

  • Brenale

    whoa….Am I the only black woman that is actually attracted to white men and naturally black men???? Can’t really agree with this article as a whole. I’ve been hit on by white men….so its not completely true that black women can’t date white men.

  • J.1L

    I just think if you’re going to call something a survey, you should talk to more than 6 people; that’s a discussion not a survey. You can’t qualify any of these as things black women feel, these 6 women can’t represent the entire populous of black American women.

  • paddyommalley

    I don’t completely understand the point of these assertions. I have loved and enjoyed women my entire life and strangely never picked a woman because of her race . . . EVER. I’m not womanizer and can’t understand why some seemingly intelligent women drop their panties for every phony guy who gives them a few compliments, sio this isn’t bragging. I have my share of partners in along span of years.

    In my time I have had a Japanese lover, now with my second Black lover, both a Chinese and a Korean lover, white women from here and over there, and Hispanics, mainly Mexican gals. I married a Mexican, then an American white woman; both were huge mistakes for me.

    I didn’t pay attention to any of those women as far as how we met, what I noticed, and what I didn’t notice until the last lady came along. I never set out to find Japanese
    or any other race. What I generally like in a woman is intelligence, wit, loyalty, and honesty and if she is tall, athletic-slim looking with large breasts—38DD’s are perfect, but 36’s are okay too—with well-shaped, but a bony looking derriere. I happen to like what some people would call Northern /Western European features which excludes many in all races including Euro’s. One of the most important things for me is my gut feeling about her. If it isn’t right at the beginning, it isn’t ever going to be right.

    I met Alexis at her job and in five-minutes she mowed me down and knocked me out; and I enjoyed every second of it. After I left her all I knew was she was intelligent, quick and witty, really dark, black as my leather jacket, her skin was like polished onyx, and I thought she was really, really attractive. I didn’t know if she was honest or loyal, but my gut told me she was, so she was. I didn’t see her for a month and then I slowed down and paid close attention to her. She was still witty, quick, and intelligent; she was about 5’-8”, my guess was 36 D, slim and slim hipped, nice legs, and her hair was Black-hair that was black and done like, what I thought, an Aphrodite-like braided crown. The
    woman was so attractive I was having trouble talking to her this time. Is she gorgeous? Too me she is, but I think saying she is intriguing, enchanting, charming, happy, and matter of fact says plenty.

    My point was this: Alexis could be white, Asian, or Hispanic and she would have grabbed my attention. I have never looked at a woman and said, no, it’s time a try a Turk out.
    I feel comfortable that I selected a matching partner and I believe she’d say the same about me.

  • Justsayingg

    Most black men marry outside their race?? Thats totally untrue!

    • Guest

      2010 census stats show that
      More than 89% of BM who marry, wed BW
      ( 9 out of 10 )
      anything else is media propaganda.

  • Dalain

    I know the cousin of one of my friends who is married to a white man. She is a dark skin, educated woman who perms her hair. Her husband begs her to go natural every time he sees a black woman with natural hair.She refuses. He’s ready for children, she isn’t. On the other hand, my British niece absolutely refuses to date any other ethnicity except black, and she is still single. I suggested that she is probably limiting the pool of choices, but she is resolute about her decision even though she has been approached by different ethnicity. Same is true for my cousin, also British, who this white guy really was attracted to. He tried and tried, even the family encouraged her to give him a chance. She refused, married a black guy who gave her some problems. I don’t know if the white man would have given her problems too, but I’m just saying. I think it’s a matter of personal preference. My black family is ‘littered’ with so many different ethnicity that I sometimes refer to us as the UN.Jew, Indian (Hindu), Irish, just to name a few. Personal preferences more than anything else…in my opinion.

  • incognegro

    I’m having hard time understanding why all of a sudden there are so many studies being done on BLACK women on websites,magazines,news shows LEAVE US THE HELL ALONE! we are FINE please sisters stop feeding into this BULLSHIT,dispite are BLAck men we have never been quick to date outside of our race,and white men know this about us already there just trying to figure out why we are loyal to our BLAck men because they don’t love us,

    • Guest

      Don’t believe the hype..
      2010 census stats show that
      More than 89% of BM who marry, wed BW
      ( 9 out of 10 )

  • Teresa Rincon

    These interracial issues usually only discuss black and white relationships, but I’d be interested in statistics about black women and other groups – Indian men, Asian men, Hispanic men, etc.

    • Never seen a black W / Asian M couple.

      • Ebony in Hartford


  • curlyq74

    As a Black woman having dated men of all races, I can understand some of the findings in this article. However, if a man is attracted to you, enjoy the attraction and worry about the other things later. There are lots of White men (and Hispanic, Asian, Pacific Islander men, etc) that love Black women. Embrace love where ever it may come from.

  • ODWms

    “the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race.”
    Wow. So much wrong with that line (grammatically as well as in content) its embarrassing. Another big issue no one seems to want to be upfront about is weight. Let’s be real: white guys are just not into obesity like a lot of brothas are, and most sistas today are obese.
    We’d like to make it about sistas “not choosing” white guys. But the truth is most sistas today are just not attractive to men outside of our race.

  • rainbow

    Well who are the black women you surveyed? I hate the fact that weaves are associated with blacks. Anyway, I have had no problem with white men, Asian men, Latino, middle eastern, Greek, hitting on me. White men have no problem dating black women but the problem is we don’t look like black women anymore. We have morphed into something else.

    • rainbow

      With these hair weaves that have become a lot of black women’s crutch, black women look strange. Missing edges, crazy looking hair. We have got to get it together ladies. A weave once in a while, fine, a weave 80% of the time is too much. Some of you have been wearing it so long that you have to wear it. You have no choice

  • Nunya

    What a ridiculous article. Black woman already have enough stereotypes to overcome. Just go ahead and add some more.

  • shocked

    horrible scope of the author

  • yojoe

    Smarter and work harder ?? Are you kidding ? Whites do NOT have Affirmative Action or Diversity programs or set aside programs for Blacks only. Are you not aware of these programs ??

    • finneriklarsen

      and that is a good thing after 400 years of slavery and mass rape of the black women we need affirmative action for another 400 years to balance things, don’t you think?

      • yojoe

        Unlike you I have more confidence in the Black community. I believe that Blacks are just as intelligent as Whites and Asians. Why do you have such a racist attitude. Even if your correct that Blacks need Affirmative Action and Diversity programs to keep up with the Whites and Asians for the next 400 years are you suggestion that Blacks are so inferior that they do not have the ability to be taught or learn as Whites and Asians do?

        • finneriklarsen

          I am baffled at how you arrived at you conclusion, supporting affirmative action is not a racist thing it is however merely a band aid on 400 years of suffering. Intelligence has nothing to do with race however the black community of fatherless children is disadvantaged compared to white, latinos and asian families because these families do have a father at home. Again that has nothing to do with race or intelligence but more to do with black men not supporting their offspring to the same extend that other races do. Why they don’t I have no idea, but since you have such confidence in the black community maybe you can convince the 5/6 of black men that have kids but don’t bother to raise them to change ?

      • paddyommalley

        Get out! Eight-percent (less than 340,000 individuals) of US families owned slaves in 1860. Most white Americans had no participation in slavery, nor endorsed it and those of us who came after slavery wonder what you think with. You want affirmative action? Demand it out of the Black Slavers who sold Blacks into the horrors of slavery. There are many, many successful and well balanced Blacks in this country because they don’t dwell on what took place over 150-years ago. They are making the best out of life that life offers. There wasn’t 400 years of slavery in this country anyway, 190 or 200 years is the more accurate. But if you’re talking about Jim Crow Laws then why do you keep voting for the people who wrote and enforced them? Move on or embrace failure.

    • finneriklarsen

      Of course I am aware of these programs aimed to equalize the inequality devised by racists over the course of the last 4 centuries. The white race has pillaged and raped nations of people and countries for centuries (England, Portugal, Spain, Denmark, Turkey, Holland, France, Soviet Union etc), this is a very small inconvenience to suffer compared to the atrocities committed by the white race.

      • yojoe

        So now you want to blame WHITES on the ill’s of the world and not on the GREAT engineering inventions, MEDICAL life saving procedures, civilized behavior and the list goes on and on. So I guess you want to live in a world of HEADHUNTERS and where natives put another native in a BOILING pot and when cooked, have a meal.
        Good luck to you sir !!!

        • Serenity

          Whites were, still are and always will be responsible for all the atrocities of this world – slavery, colonialism, holocaust, world wars – but to name a few. No amount of medical or technological inventions is ever going make up for atrocities committed nor erase its lasting damages.

        • finneriklarsen

          Nope I am not blaming whites for all the ills in the world. Merely stating the facts on slavery. I wonder why you are incapable of staying on topic, are you a dumb white person?

      • Dirk Agia

        STFU! When will you bring up the fact that Africans are still enslaving other Africans TODAY!?

  • captjeng

    lmao, this is so bogus.
    the ideas, experiences, and insecurities of 6 black women out of millions means nothing.

  • Jocelyn Beverly

    Okay this is about the silliest ish I have read in awhile. I am dating a 49 yr old white man who approached me, I have never had any issues with dating a white man. Men are men, it is just skin color as far as I am concerned.

  • crisjones

    There’s a huge difference between voluptuous and grossly fat or mannish.

    • Voluptuous now, usually fat in 20 years, not the other way around..

  • Time4change44

    It’s not that black women won’t date white men. I don’t mean to sound racist but most white men aren’t interested in black women, It’s just a fact. I do see some white men dating black women but not much.

    • Gina Hall

      I have asked male friends from all races what they do and don’t like about women from different races. Across the board, men say the thing they don’t like about black women is that they are loud in public. they say if she’s excited or upset, everyone in a 5 mile radius can hear it.

      • paddyommalley

        I disagree with that. Yes Black women can get really loud and unleash some colorful language and I wouldn’t want to be involved in that, but white women can be the same, exact way, and so can some Hispanic women. I know some Black women who can remain lady like regardless, so it is just another stereotype half made up on TV. What I’m trying to say with all that is I wouldn’t date a white woman who behaved that way and she could look like Andie McDowell (my favorite Hollywood hottie).

  • Random Generic

    “the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race.”
    What despicable BS. Show me the statistic and where you got it. How can you in good conscience write outright lies like this? Somebody take her journalism license and throw it in the trash…along with this article.
    A six person poll…must have exhausted you, calling your six girlfriends who would agree to such idiocy.
    And BTW…the phrase is “nowadays”, not “now and days”.

    • Guest

      You are absolutely correct.
      Trollish writing to cause a massive stir.
      2010 census stats show that
      More than 89% of BM who marry, wed BW
      ( 9 out of 10 )

  • E.

    This list is ridiculous!! The only thing on there that made any sense is not being attracted to white men. All the other stuff are total BS!! I am back and have dated black and Hispanic. White men LOVE curves and big butts and NATURAL HAIR!! Or whatever kind of hair. If the black woman has self-esteem issues about her education and money situation, then she should do better. Your research is flawed, SEVERELY!!! I agree with ROY and KIR12.

  • It’s not race; it’s culture and shared expectations. It’s hard enough to make a marriage work with a shared background. Why lower the odds of success by inviting more surprises and needs to negotiate across dissimilar backgrounds?

  • Caydence James

    I think that you might need to poll more than these 6 women because that’s not my reality nor the reality of many of the black women I know. Most of the women I know aren’t as self limiting as they were years ago because we realize hat if we wait on black men to become more educated, more employable and regain their interest in us, our lives will past us by!
    As a result I’ve seen a LOT more of us dating outside of our race!
    As for those 6 women you polled – you might want to suggest that they make some adjustments on either what they look like, what they believe to be true about themselves and become more observant when they’re out and about.

  • discoal

    White men not attractive? WTF? I think it’s the other way around. I’ll take them over ugly-looking black guys any day!!!

  • Nicole

    Too often these articles which are supposed to be (I think) informative and therefore on some level meant to help by informing focus on negativity. I do not disagree with providing information however, I believe the message can be delivered in a more positive way. I also think these issues often depend upon who is being surveyed and where they live. I live in the Baltimore/Washington DC area and see black women of all shapes and sizes with white men, asian, and latino men. Myself and many of my friends and family members again of all shapes, sizes, and complexions have dated and been approached by white men and men of all races. White men that I have dated always state that it is a myth that white men do not like curvaceous women and a myth that white men don’t like black women. And it’s funny because recently when the guy I was dating visited me at my apt (he is white) I noticed that my male Caucasiaon neighbors showed a little more interest in me, they were noticebly friendlier. I believe this is because they saw me with my white date and were then aware that yes I date white men, yes I find white men attractive, so on a certain level it removes the fear of rejection based on race. And think that maybe the reason some black women may report white men dont approach them is because it’s intimidating enough to approach a stranger but to approach a strnager outside of your race maybe even scarier if you are under the false impression that this person will reject you because your not int the same ethnic group. I think people just need to be open minded, positive, don’t be afraid to step outside the box, and stop making assumptions.

  • Edisto Island Boy

    So let me get this right, I don’t love my black wife because of her hair, curves or education? Our kids are mongloids because I am white and she is black? Please explain that to them with their 3.85 GPA and yes my wife has natural hair. I don’t ride my motorcycle on a straight road because it bores me, always enjoy a curvy ride. So after all of these years I have to go after Taylor Swift or some other carpenters dream with straight flaxen hair? I was stationed in Europe and Japan we never even thought anything was wrong, maybe it is time for me to go back to Sicily!

  • nonracist

    they’re RACIST

  • michele

    I don’t agree with #2. I been ask out by a couple of white guys,but I don’t trust them.. When I say decline their offer, they ask is it because their white lol

    • Time4change44

      You trust the guy that created the 76% of baby’s born out of wedlock in your race?

      • michele

        I don’t know any men in the black race like this or that have done this.

        • paddyommalley

          You are joking, aren’t you? For over 40 years the UNWED PREGNANCY Rate of Black teenage girls has been over 70%. That is 7 out of 10 teen girls at any one time has been knocked up by nearly a 100% of the time by a black teenage boy and often a much older man.

          • michele

            NO, I’m not joking.. like I said ” I ” don’t know any men in the black race that do or have done this. The unwed pregnancy rate among Black teenagers is high but I don’t agree with your estimate..Now you say ” UNWED PREGNANCY Rate “, white teenagers get knocked up ALLLL the d@mn time, but they don’t keep those babies..the abortion rate among whites is high. All the these girls are getting pregnant, BUT black females keep their babies while the white ones KILL theirs

            • Guest

              An excellent rebuttal and truth.
              It’s why the GOP and conservatives are up in arms about
              abortion rates in their communities because it’s lowering the white birth rates and shifting the nation’s demographics in favor of minorities who do give birth…wed or unwed.

            • paddyommalley

              I am sympathetic to the plight of babies born into poverty, any race, any ethnicity in the US, because it is as near to a death sentence as those babies can get. I have not estimated anything, the government, who is worse than baseball for tracking statistics, say that the unwed birth info for 13 to 19-year old Black girls is that 72% of those girls give birth to at least one child and it has been in the 70% to 75% range for about 40 years. Couple that with an overall high school drop out rate of 45% (40% to 55% (depending on city) of Black teenagers and the picture is bleak, very bleak for Black women.
              I do not deny that white girls rely on abortion to help keep their rate of teen, unwed pregnancies at 35% (but it has been rising in recent years). I am fully and immovable in the anti-abortion camp and will never change. 33-years ago, I got a young woman pregnant and after she told me, I asked her to give me a day to think about things (I was separated from my wife at the time). The next night she came over to my place, I asked her if she was considering an abortion (I wasn’t suggesting, just trying to find out what she wanted) and when she said she had thought maybe, but wasn’t sure, I asked her not too and she agreed. I moved to a larger place, she moved in, and then told me she was expecting twins. By then my marriage was definitely over as you might have guessed but it made little difference. My name went on their birth certificate and we stayed together for five-years, but things fell apart. I continued to pay for their support until they turned 18, then helped with their expenses in a community college. I’m currently helping pay off my 32-year old daughters extensive dental bill as I write this. I told my lover I would pay and I did so without a court order and I also stayed in their lives as much as I could.
              I was lucky, I had a decent job that paid middle class wages, but I still did without those 13-years until they turned 18, but I did what I was supposed to do, but I loved the girl.
              I’m not trying to be a hero, but a man without honor is not a man and even a 14-year old boy should have honor. It is time to quit making excuses for girls who are destroying their lives and the lives of their children just to make a boy happy.

  • Shmuel

    I thought they’d date a white guy if he’s Jewish? Jews (who are not totally assimilated) tend to have grown up in a different value system.

  • Mimi

    I have always believed that you should be with the one you want to be with regardless of race. I’ve dated a few white men in the past and the first two were more curious than anything else. When I begun to get that “I would not be brought home to Mama” feeling, I moved on since I’m no one’s experiment or fantasy relationship. The third white guy was really awesome, but I was not really attracted to him.

    I think it depends on your exposure too, if you live in an all black neighborhood it may be less likely to be exposed to men of different races, but now with the internet more possibilities are open. Just like dating black men, you meet them in your everyday life, tho I met the two white guys I dated from a newspaper ISO (In search of section), at the time I was working for a Washington DC local magazine and a friend who ran the dept., encouraged me to place a free ad, for fun.

    One thing I found was different is how polite the white men were and how they asked before proceeding to do anything. Lol, that was a change. Maybe it was because they were not sure or confident to just take charge as I was used to the black men doing in my life.

    I would encourage black women to not limit themselves to one race but to sample the menu and choose what is best for you and what works best for you, your life and goals. But to find a good man, any man, you must first be that kind of woman.

    That being said, I have been married twice to two wonderful black men, my current husband and I have been together for over 20 years now. Any good relationship is based on respect, commitment, common goals and compatibility as well as the X Factor. I found in each of my marriages one person possessed a quality(s) that the other did not, so we help complete each other in a way…. Just saying

  • rocinante2

    Another $.02:

    Reason #1: Ladies of color, that may be statistically true, but there are plenty of exceptions. There are men of all races who like curvy women. The vast majority of men are more focused on either the upstairs or the downstairs, even if it’s a 51%/49% split. If a guy is more booty-oriented (like me) than boobie-centric, ladies of color have the advantage.

    Reason #2: Ladies of color, this white man has no problem with your hair. I watched “Good Hair” and I wanted to cry. [But I didn’t. ‘Cause I’m a man. 🙂 ] I might need some schooling in what to expect from your hair, but if your hair freaked me out, I wouldn’t ask any of you out. And I did.

    Reason #3: I’m going to out myself as what some people would call a “cracker” here, but the thing about class and background is: growing up poor in the rural South, working three jobs, putting myself through a state college, having to speak and dress differently so potential white-collar employers didn’t assume I was lazy, a racist, an idiot, etc., etc. means I have a lot of things in common with black people that I don’t have in common with the mostly-suburban and upper-class kids with whom I attended college (or with the big, beautiful white woman I *did* marry, who had *two* college-educated, white-collar parents and lived on the “right side of the tracks”).

    I went to integrated schools, played on integrated sports teams, played in an integrated marching band, and learned a lot from my classmates of color. Yeah, I had it easier sometimes just because I’m white, but I also know what it’s like to be an outsider , to be shamed or rejected over my background, and to have to work harder to prove myself than some guy born in better circumstances.

    We may not always get along, but we’ve been neighbors for our entire lives. We know each other better than you think.

    Reason #4: Wow. Those numbers stink. All I can say is, “I did my part”. (I will say I encountered some disbelief and suspicion from ladies of color, which I suppose meant that my overtures were unusual and unexpected.)

    Reason #5: Well, you can’t argue with feelings.

    Still, you might take Ms. Davis-Martin’s advice and give that sincere, well-groomed white guy with a good job a chance. You might have to teach him some things, and communicate, communicate, communicate, but if his heart’s in the right place, he’ll treat you right.

  • This Guy

    Lame article. What would any white man date a black woman? Black women are the least attractive women of all races as a group.

    • Guest

      Pure Rubbish.
      And you know it.
      Only a pure racist would make a generalized statement about beauty
      affecting only one race.

  • Yazzito

    For many people, it doesn’t necessarily have to do with looks. It has to do with their values and what kind of person they are. I would date any race with the exception of black. Why? Their values and virtues. They do not mix with mine, at all. I don’t care what other people do, but when selecting a partner, their values is THE key factor in my decision. Until the entire black culture changes (look at the entire rap culture, ebonics, etc..) and stops blaming everyone else for their problems and they do something to better themselves, I will continue to steer clear.

    • Judith O

      You are being foolish and you are generalizing. Not all black people fall into the subset you just mentioned. You should continue to steer clear because even the “best” or “like values oriented” black females may not want to date you or your kind (with your mind set) either.

      • Heartland Patriot

        I think the problem with the mindset Yazzito has is the same problem with a lot of things in this country. The news and entertainment media has trained all Americans to think about certain things certain ways. When some groups of white folks only see stories on the news about gang thugs and movies about the same, what are they going to think? Just like black folks seeing white people in the news and TV and movies as a bunch of rich nerds or hillbilly racists. Neither one of those viewpoints is true, but that is what the people who make those shows are pushing.

        • Guest

          The media has been the tool of the oligarchs that run this country and perpetuated stereotypes for the sole purposes of maintaining the status quo..
          With them and their ilk ahead.

  • roblimo

    The last time I asked a black woman out was in 1989. We got married in 1991. We’re still married in 2013. Percentages don’t matter. All you need is one — of whatever race, and I don’t think race is a very good selection criterion for a wife or husband.

    • rainbow

      I totally agree

  • Kit23

    I know this is an old article, but really. I have dated white men and none of these reasons ever entered into my mind. Date whomever you want to; the heart wants what the heart wants. As for those who don’t think you SHOULD date outside your race, tell them this: “I never date outside my race because every person I date is of the same race as me; the HUMAN race.”

  • … for great justice.

    Looks like the vast majority of the reasons BF don’t date WM’s are their own conceptions of what WM’s think, rather than what WM’s really think. Now, whose fault is that?

    Different folks cross the divide for different reasons and in different ways.

    Some commenters have noted the forbidden fruit aspect of BM/WF and the WF wanting to torque out their straight-laced Dad (that’d probably work too. Good job).

    For WM’s, in sheer numbers, we are normally in direct contact (school, work, travel) with other WF’s. After all, the USA is a White-majority country. There is little reason to approach a BF unless she goes out of her way to give you that come-hither look, and, according to the reasons the authoress has given in her article, for the most part, they aren’t doing it.

    Make no mistake, the females pick the males. We might offer to buy the drinks, but it’s the girl who gives you their number (or a fake number, say, to a Gay dating line).

    That being said, I have seen the rise of the educated Black Female starting to seek out WM’s, if only because of a shrinking pool of co-equal BMs. Why? Because it is the BF who is disproportionately taking advantage of educational opportunities and professional advancement opportunities, versus that of her BM counterparts.

    Contrariwise, demographically, the BM’s are more highly incarcerated at rates far beyond other demographic groups.

    On another note, the problem of the closeted, bisexual Black Male (Brotha on the Down-Low), bearing HIV and other infections, is a real dating (and life-threatening) risk. BM’s are one of the fastest growing HIV infection groups, and (as a result) among those who contract the disease by hetero contact, BF’s are the highest.

    Another observation made by social scientists is that females adopt the cultural characteristics of the males they are attracted to. WF’s adopting the language and dress patterns associated with lower-echelon Urban Blacks, while professional and educated BF’s will speak ‘White’ rather than Ebonic and straighten their hair.

    Indeed, the first hint that a BF would be open to a relationship to a WM is straigtened hair. Second, her speech patterns. The clincher is how she reacts to you in conversation.

    My two cents.

    • rainbow

      Well her speech pattern may sound”white” because that is where she grew up in, not to get a white man

  • Marina Calis

    This article saddens me! If a black woman wants a decent marriage she will have to marry white.Black men are judgmental,put women of color down,have self esteem issues,want white women,don’t want to work and be the breadwinner,do not care about money,their lazy,always looking to upgrade and super size,never satisfied and the list goes on.At least with white men they do value money,marriage,commitment more so than men of color.Not sure what men of color problems are…but they have some serious issues.

    • Guest

      The article saddens you,
      but you spewed out a litany of stereotypical nonsense you can
      read in any racist mag.
      You are the gullible and sad one.

  • GlaciersofIce

    Please stop using “naturally”; you seem not to know what that word means.

  • Kurt Hennig

    I get hit on all the time by Black girls of all ages but it’s just not my thing…I’m a Chica boy, Love Hispanic girls and always have! Can’t stand uptight White girls and all the issues and problems that come with them…especially older ones! I’d rather chew off a limb than sit and listen to how evil men are and every atrocity ever committed against her in the first 10 minutes of meeting a divorced White woman and have to fight and beg for cold fish sex! Hispanic girls are not only beautiful but have it going on! (- :

    • Time4change44

      That’s so wrong…are you saying white women are bad in bed? Not true at all. Just like any race you have good and bad. By the way, Spanish girls can be dirty even if they are pretty

  • Zeke

    I’m a white guy, not sure how I got here but I just wanted to say that I like black women who are intelligent and not too skinny. I like the big butt on any woman!

    • KunTewk

      Well I think you’re stupid

      • Kurt Hennig

        Got issues?

      • Guest

        Seriously retarded

  • Redd x

    People people seriously what is with all the stats and stuff. Since when did it matter who’s with who. Have we really go nothing better to write about other than mathematically analyse who black women are dating? or is this just another bit at black women because everything some black women do they have to advertise it, make an article and the whole worlds discussin’ n cussin’ n judgin’ all of us for something a few do.

    Im truly sick and bored to death with all the black women dating white men, is it right for you? or 10 reasons not to date a black man – really wtf, why do people keep making such a big deal. This is why EVERYONE questions everything black people do because you get articles like this questioning little things waaaaay too much. Why not have an article talking about day to day stress and overcoming it or even dating tips, why this stuff all the time like theres something wrong with it.

  • Daneel Olivaw

    I had never dated a black woman before I met my fiance, but since I have, I have been surprised about how little race affects our relationship. Yes, I had to learn about the hair thing, but it’s not even a thing now. I love her hair and her body and I could go on and on. I cannot imagine being with anyone else now. I know we were meant for each other.

  • Steven Martinez

    I know my name will throw people off, but I am a Black woman believe me. Listen what I tell you.. Don’t date a white man. Ever. You will live to regret it. I can tell you several horror stories of dealing with them.

    • KunTewk

      Don’t worry. Since we’re laying all out, most white men don’t even wee black women as being “women”. They seem much more like transsexual black men than White/Asian women. Too much testosterone. I swear I think I’ve seen a set of balls bulging their over tight spandex . UUGGHH !
      I can’t even imagine myself with a black woman.

      • Guest

        Seriously retarded.
        UUGGHH !

  • anonymous

    I am a white man who has exclusively dated black women for 13 years and have even married a black women, but I am divorced to her though, and I will say some of some of these are true but one of them holds out in my experience more than anything, along with a few others. I never had the issue with hair, or education or income, with women I dated. as these things are less important, some education is nice but not a necessity. hair is not a big deal to me as I have dated black ladies long enough to have a good understanding of things, not to mention if you like or love a black lady you accept them as they are, also I love black hair so I guess for me it never mattered. the biggest problems I encountered are black ladies not being attracted to me as a white man. I am a fairly good looking man, not the best but certainly not the worst. I have received comments like I cant believe a white man can like/or love me this much, or that I even loved them more than some of the black males they have dated. I also got comments like you are good looking but not tall enough, or your not bad looking for a white man but I don’t date white, or even have some say they prefer white men, but when they see that I am 100% real they get scared and sabotage the relationship. I wonder if one says the like white men then why would it be scary if I show strong interest in a long term relationship, or marriage.
    it is tough to find a black women who will date a white man, I have no problem approaching black women, because I personally find black women the most attractive race of women on Gods green earth, but it gets depressing when your feelings towards numerous black women are not reciprocated back just because I am a white male. just because I only date black women doesn’t make it a fetish, it is a preference, just like a white man who only dates white women or Hispanic women, I only date black women. but I still put hope that one day I can date and yes eventually find another black women to marry again, hopefully my future black wife will actually love me and want to be with me. so the moral of this comment there are white men like me who love and prefer and only date black ladies, and we approach as well, we white men who love black ladies are waiting for you to accepts us, the sooner the better because I have lots of love to offer the right black women and I want to give it. 100% real and sincere anyone care to take me up on that.
    another note I have two mixed kids , they are black/white and I love them to death and couldn’t imagine life without them.

    • Time4change44

      Maybe you just don’t look as good as you think

  • Paul

    Black, white, yellow who cares? I’ve dated girls from all races. Who cares about percentages and colours. If you like someone tell them. Is about attraction and love and this pointless topic has only triggered pages and pages of the opposite. Get off your computer and go and make someone happy before you are dead. Thanks.

  • RA

    Only read the first couple dozen comments, so may be repeating a point already made…But Really!?!? You interview SIX women and consider that a reasonable population sample? You say black women don’t date white men because white men won’t approach them, as shown by only two of your subjects saying they had been. Two out of six is over 33%. Yeah, that’s not a hundred but if every one in three black women is being hit on by white men I’m pretty sure that we can’t say they’re not interested.

  • KunTewk

    Whoa ! You spend anytime reading about what goes on in Africa ?
    You have the gall to compare what horrors black people commit to what white people do ?
    Why even lie like that ? The whole planet can see for themselves….it’s all right there !!!

  • KunTewk

    Whoa ! You spend anytime reading about what goes on in Africa ?
    You have the gall to compare what horrors black people commit to what white people do ?
    Why even lie like that ? The whole planet can see for themselves….it’s all right there !!!

  • DeBaliviere

    we as black women still have not become completely comfortable dating outside our race

    Speaking a la Chris Matthews (on behalf of all white men) “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”P.S. Get back to us when you drop those last 75 lbs.

    • Guest

      And you can get lost,
      don’t come back for a visit until you learn some manners.

      Thank you!

  • KunTewk

    This white man is on a mission. I’ve been on the internet for a longtime. Anonymity has been a great thing for getting people’s honest opinion on things. First thing is the private and public statements are quite different. The difference between private statements and this lovey dovey multicultural fantasy that is desperately propagandized in the media is stark.
    Speaking to a majority black audience here, will you consider a peaceable, voluntary national segregationist movement? A break up of the USA ?
    Frankly all I see from the black community is unhappiness and discontent. I believe most white people unhappy with multiculturalism also. I am both both unwilling and unable to change myself to meet that which you appear to be demanding from me as a white person.
    Please, right now is the time for cool heads to prevail. Blacks and whites realize there is a vast race baiting industry in existence. Al Sharpton for instance has become very wealthy stoking never ending race conflict and LOVES desegregation because it stokes that same conflict.
    Do you feel my desperation ?

    • Guest

      You have no credibility since you didn’t mention racemongers like
      Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck, Ann Coulter, and the entire right wing
      Tea Party who shill for neo nazis.

  • Will

    I can’t see mee.. with a white woman. White people are a little too slory for me. Plus, at $17 trillion in debt, all that glitters ain’t gold! Don’t try to make excuses for them, they do that very well for themselves. And what about the debt crisis in Europe? What caused that? The same thing that caused the debt in the US. The flaky, lame, short of a full deck of cards, when you wish upon a star, lieing ways

  • william Bramblett

    What about the more obvious ones…they don’t particularly like white men, they worry about what their families and black friends would say (race traitor!), can’t find a white brother who speaks ebonics, etc.?

  • pdc29

    The majority of Black men date and marry outside their race. What sort of hogwash, backwards statistic is that?!?! How exactly are we defining “race” here? I’m sorry, proof please!

  • The_Erica

    I think this is a well written article with lots of good information. There is alot of truth to how African American Women have felt about dating outside of their race. Love is love and it does not matter what color a person skin is. Remember, race is just an illusion it is our culture and upbringing that makes us different. I am an African American woman and don’t care if Black men date outside of their race because I am not married to them. They are free agents as I am a free agent to date and love who I please. Furthermore, when you are in a relationship you need to focus on how you can make it work and not worry about what society thinks. If two people are happy with one another they should not let anyone come between them.

  • SharnCedar

    Black women are hot. But my main concern in dating an American black woman is her friends and family – is she strong enough to stand up to them and ignore any negativity they might have about our relationship. She has to be very self-confident and sure of who she is and what she wants so that other people don’t mess up the relationship. But this is true in any cross-culture relationship.

  • skinny white boy

    Have any of you ladies out there considered that many of us white guys have absolutely NO problem with dating, or even marrying a black woman? Personally, I LOVE a voluptuous body and black women walk away with most of the prizes there! Many of us are concerned about your brother, whether biological or cultural, kicking our asses for daring to cross the line!

  • Donald Frazier

    In a list of things that are supposed to turn me off but don’t, this one is especially weird.

    Gutsiness and confidence are the most attractive things about any women, and black women rank high in that — often for the precise reasons you give.

  • CDK

    Man, there’s a lot of negative attitude on this in these comments. Most white people I know, race isn’t even an issue for my generation (30’s) and younger, or it seems LESS an issue than for most of the black people I know. YMMV, but most white guys I know don’t care what race a girl is to find them attractive, it’s just that we assume #5 from the list, and that’s the reason for #4.

  • kyuhyun lover

    Also not to be rude but maybe the black women you guys polled weren’t generally attractive. I see what this article says but young good looking women have no trouble getting white men. Same goes for anyone any race.

  • kyuhyun lover

    whoever wrote the 1st part about curves know nothing about white “men”.
    Do you know how many times i’ve seen whites guys bash thin girls who are perfectly healthy.
    They love curves as much as black guys do, As long as you don’t have a gut they won’t care. Have you seen kate upton she has no shape, yet people love her “curves” because of her boobs.

  • Keema Crayola Farrow

    Wow this list was way off, except no 6. So not true i get approached by white guys all the time; however, just not my thing. Nevertheless, love African, brazilian, arab, indian and even asian….angelo saxon…nope. No thank you.

  • racefan311

    WOW! I just saw this today and hate I missed it when it first appeared. I’ll admit when I first started reading it, I was prepared to write a comment saying that if any of the women who gave you those reasons believed their rationale then that’s on THEM and shows THEIR insecurities but I am glad to see the author covered it in closing. As a Black woman who has dated both Black and White men and who is currently married to a wonderful man who just happens to be White, I would say that so many are misinformed and look at IR dating, specifically BW/WM combinations, as a rarity when in fact we’re not. We’re just getting more attention from mainstream media nowadays so it’s a surprise for many to even know we exist. There are more BW/WM combos than BW/Hispanic, Pacific Islander or Asian according to the latest census and is the largest growing segment of any other IR combination. We have an IR social/dating group for BW/WM and I can tell you for a fact, the number of WM who find BW VERY attractive and desirable would surprise you. There are some who ONLY date BW and it’s not due to some “myth” or stereotype, it’s just what they like and what they prefer. The same for other combinations. We encourage all people, especially BW, to not limit themselves when it comes to dating. How can we overcome racism if we practice it ourselves? If you want to only date or marry a specific race then that is your right and your choice. Just don’t denigrate, scoff at or demean those that choose not to do so and leave their options open. We are happy and aren’t bothering anyone so why should it matter? The only ones who seem to have a “problem” with it are those who are narrow minded, bigoted and have an issue within themselves. To those people, I say we pray for you and hope you find some happiness in your life that is not based on what other people are doing and what makes them happy.

  • Newp Ort

    as far as bodies, I think the girls with the boom are gaining in popularity amongst all men. I definitely digs dips that got the hips that are gigantic

  • Penny

    British black women are more likely to be highly educated, articulate, and speak the Queen’s English and have “breeding” than their American counterparts – I remember in Britain you just say “black” rather than have euphemisms like “African-British.” The differences START with what they call themselves and avalanche from there. British black women are more likely to grow up ‘middle class’ go to the same schools and universities, major in the same subjects and have the same hobbies and interests as white men so that’s yet another difference……”across the Pond.”

  • William IV

    Really interesting article. As a white guy who’s dated a number of black women, this makes a lot of sense. Black women always seem very surprised and a bit insecure when I approach them but you guys (by you guys I mean black women, I know, not PC but who are the majority of people reading this article?) need to be more confident about your hair and your body (this “white guys love anorexic girls” is largely a myth), you’re beautiful the way you are. And the 5th reason is especially true, swag aka combination of confidence, wit, intelligence, cool and calm demeanor, tends to be very different between white and black guys. Most white dudes act more like Paul Rudd or Steve Carell than Justin Timberlake or Robin Thicke, it is what it is.

    • rainbow

      I love Paul Rudd

    • Guest

      Well, what do you expect when they largely get the impression that they aren’t attractive? And I prefer the nerdy, shy types to the odious Timberlake and Thicke’s of the world.

  • Webb

    that background and education paragraph wasnt a valid reason. there are plenty of successful black women who date other successful men no matter the race.the fact that you pretty much classified all white men as successful and most black women as lower class and unsuccessful is a problem. if class is an issue there are plenty of white men of a lower class, so how does this excuse fit in there. you present the idea of statistics but never show the actual statistics to back up you’re claim. this issue of class is invalid because you are generalizing, and it seems like you just needed to fill a quota for your list and thought to throw in some half-assed put together first draft full of invalid excuses and generalizations.

  • Starr Jonez

    Seriously if you want to date out–DO IT–who cares, it’s your life. Encouraging women to be open-minded is a great thing but I hate articles that push people to embrace white people or a certain ethnicity in particular. Does it matter? It’s not about being specifically open to X, Y or Z, it’s about being OPEN, period. White people are not special, they are not any better option than any other. They are people like anyone else. Just find a guy you like and if he happens to be not black, it’s okay. But quite frankly, I’m not attracted to white guys at all even though I used to be when I was younger. As someone who grew up around alot of white people I’ve figured them out to hugely overrated. Like a fly on the wall listening to them talk, and talk about POC among other things, I don’t think I could in good conscience ever marry one of them. But who knows. Plus I dunno…I’m stuck on the not aging well thing. I admit I’m a bit shallow. Oh well.

  • Malfean

    You forgot the one where other blacks ridicule the woman for dating outside her race. I had the honor of dating the most beautiful black woman I have ever seen before or since. She was just… beautiful. Stunning. She was not well off, I was / am. She had an HS education, I was a grad student… and none of that mattered. I would have married her, except that her family, her friends, and even the people on her street gave her so much crap because here was a red-headed white guy dating her. Eventually she caved because too many people were pressuring her. It was 8 months of relentless misery for her, and although we were very much happy together, it was just something she couldn’t do anylonger… so you should have added that little factoid in there as well.

    • William IV

      Dude, how did you stand for that? Call them out on the ignorant BS. You’re both adults, you can date whoever you want. Imagine if it was the other way around. If they’re so backwards-assed that they dismiss you because of your race, you shouldn’t seek their approval. Just my take

  • JB

    The reason is white men don’t date black women.

  • Sarah

    Many white guys aren’t approaching white women either! (you’ve got to go after whomever YOU want…unless he’s married etc.) This coming from a white girl who approached her Pacific Islander boyfriend b/c she thought he was hot 🙂

  • Jessica

    I see no problems with interracial dating…

  • Naomi

    I believe the biggest factor of not being able to date a white man is because he will never be able to understand the struggles that African Americans still have to face on a daily basis. My race is the largest factor of who I am. How can i be with someone who doesnt understand that?

    • Starr Jonez

      Exactly! What happened to–“we just don’t want to date them” and they generally “don’t get it”.

  • kez

    All this is irrelevant. I am black and proud but I don’t care if you’re what ever race if you appeal to me then that’s that. If you don’t like me oh well you deal with it, however I’m gonna move on. That truthurts really has some issues to deal with. If you gonna let the past define you future then so be it. Stay stuck. You are no better than any supremacist, calling people mongrels. They cant help where they come from. I don’t know who did you in but u have some serious hate issues. I suggest you speak with someone. However imma stick to my white bf who appreciates a good woman regardless of skin colour. Say whatever you will I’m living a happy life.

  • jesus

    This is priceless!

    An article about how desirable black woman are…

    White guys dont date black girls for the same reason so many black guys dont date them either.

  • Trey

    It’s not that white men don’t find them attractive; it’s quite the opposite. Their is a large percentage of white men who find black women attractive. White men love exotic women, it’s a known fact. However the problem is they don’t find black women’s attitudes very attractive. That’s why they tend to date Asians an other ethnic groups more often because they’re exotic as well, just without the attitude. Their also very intimidated by black women, it’s a reflection on their attitudes American black women are least likely to submissive or play their position than any other race.

  • jesus

    LOL! White guys dont date black women for the same reason no one else dates black women, even black guys.
    Figure it out

  • EqualOpportunist

    Why does it matter who dates who? If people want to limit themselves from finding love by fishing into one pond, let them. I could care less who I see another man or woman date no matter what race they are. I’ve dated many men of different races and nationalities. I’ve also been approached by many of them and vice versa. I met my husband, a British white guy, in a bar in the States. Through dating I actually became less attracted to Black men because of the way they approached me and treated me. I don’t answer to shorty, baby, mama, etc.. and I didn’t appreciate being called names for turning them down even though I did it politely and nicely. I’ve been treated better by men of different races and nationalities than black American men and women for that matter. I’ve gotten more grief for my dating choices from black American women than I have the men. The men do it without a care so why being a black women should I? We’re all humans, we all bleed red, go through similar problems and issues and want the best in life so why care about something as sill as skin color.

  • Michael

    As a man who is married to a black woman I can tell you that it is not that black women are not attracted to white men, in fact it’s the opposite, I am frequently hit on by black women everywhere I go but being in an interracial relationship (not my first) I can tell you the stigma of black women with white men comes from the black community. A black “family” will rail against the women for going after white men at the same time applauding the men for seeking white or other race women. Black women are simply getting fed up with the sub standard treatment that comes from black men who will become any religion which makes a female subserviant to them. The best women I have found on this planet are balck women and I am happy to say they love me just as much as I love them. Let the black men have the stupid white girls….I’ll keep the beautiful black queen.

  • JustAsIam

    As a white US southerner with a strong “country” accent I have found it hard to break the ice with black women. I found they think it is a litle unsettling to have some country white boy trying to hit on them. I have had many black women let me know they where unsure I was serious. I have just been fortunate to have parents that taught me to respect a persons background but remember we are all people. That is a large statement when you take into account the facts of where someone came from but understand we are all human.
    With all respect to my beautiful natural black women be yourself and love who you want to love. I have a beautiful African-American wife and many people just do not understand how I got her. I pursed her, I cared for her, I loved her, I supported her and most importantly I am a good strong man that happens to be white and she happens to be black. If others do not understand this then that sounds like a personal problem.
    I understand as well as I can the problems the US faces with race issues and it is only something we can change from our own family. We must never forget that racism and prejudice has always been around and always will be. Those issue have to be a continous dialogoue so we can guard against the twisted ideas of racial prejudices. For me, I hope someday my children will love a person for the quality of their character and not the color of their skin.

  • TT Hill LOvely Angel

    Well i have no problem been with a White guy for 5 Year and Dang on proud it no different we are all humans So it will come to terms black women will see that there are more man’s of different race do not let the body hair get in the way and they will Love them for there Beauty
    and we will not feel where hostage to stay with one race so it will get better

  • Robbin

    There are so mighty fine white men out there. I chalk up the not attracted to white men as a reversal of the misperception that white men aren’t attracted to black women cuz they ARE.

  • Robbin

    This boils down to looks and taste. I’ve NEVER had that problem with any men…Asian, Latino, black, white… Black men have an approach unlike any other men. Where white and Asian men are subtle and start out on a level akin to friendship. Sex is last on the list, black and Latino men start out with sex. So, I’m not sure black women would even recognize if a white man was looking at them with interest.

  • Robbin

    Socioeconomic class is the key here. If you’re not of the same standing, then education will raise that bar. But…if you’re English isn’t together, forgeddaboutit!

  • Robbin

    I’ve been with men of all races. My daughter’s father is white. Our daughter is 25. My hair has gone through it’s changes, but he runs his hands through it whenever he wants! It’s JUST hair!

  • Pingback: On race and beauty | Loretta Andrews()

  • rwhaller42

    Interesting article. The recent popularity of Kate Upton suggests that white men are not as adverse to voluptuous women as they may have been in the past. Marilyn Monroe was no Twiggy either.

    But I think you are right that the current white ideal of female beauty is currently on the slender side, while black men do seem to find voluptuous women, specially those with plenty of junk in the trunk, sexier. But cultural ideals change over time. Check out any of Peter Paul Ruben’s paintings.

    I think it was Lenny Bruce who asked white men whom they would prefer, Dorothy Dandridge or Kate Smith.

  • Ash

    I don’t know where the people that wrote this article live, but where I live I see interracial couples all the time (and I live in the south, funny enough). I will admit they are mostly black men and white women, but I see quite a few black women and white men as well. I myself have gotten asked out/crushed on by Caucasian guys and it was simply a case of them being attracted to me. Color was never a big issue in my experience anyways, especially the older that I have gotten. I truly think that if you’re an attractive person, that people in general, regardless of skin tone will be attracted to you. Now whether people act on it or not sometimes is a completely different story because that usually depends on whether their friends or family will accept it and whether the person in question is ready to ignore the views and wishes of their family if they are unfortunately ignorant enough to have a problem with that. That’s usually what it boils downs to.

  • Well, I for one LOVE dating White men. Haven’t dated a Black man for a number of years now. I wear my hair natural and have never had a problem with them approaching me or approaching them myself. Of course I’m also a Country Music fanatic but what I can say is at no time ever have I ever heard a woman being called a “B” or a “H” while I’m out dancing at a Country Music Club.

  • Jones

    I have dark skin and the stereotypical West African features. I also wear braids in my hair, but to be honest, I get more attention from guys outside of my race. I don’t know if it’s the “exotic” thing (and that’s a problem on its own) but I will be approached 5 times to 1 by men outside of my race. I could speculate all day about the reasons, but I really don’t know if there’s a single answer.

  • The primary reason is because few white men want to date black women.

  • iQuote

    wow this is such a disrespect to Black Women, like she feels inferior. The problem lies with white men and their fear
    of their own system, and THEIR fear of not measuring up to the Black
    Woman. Women in general are waiting on the men to wake up and take their
    heads out of the butts of the system and see what’s really real, and
    what’s truely happening to all men in this system we live in. I dont
    believe that the reason why Black Women dont date white men is because
    they think they wont measure up to a so-called standard…it’s because the respect for her may not be there, and naturally a woman will care deeply about the respect she’s getting or not getting.
    Any Black Man will tell you that a Black Woman cannot be controlled, its
    not possible, as any people from other Cultures will tell you that
    their women cannot be controlled its just not possible. But the ones who
    are born into and inherit this system (white ppl) are born into a
    controlled and brain washed environment. That’s why when white ppl are
    in relationships with other races…they become very
    impressionable…and want to do what ever they can to be accepted, and
    most have to disown/divorce their own families in order to find some
    peace with their partner of a different race…its because its what they
    are used to…its hard for them to fathom a society where ppl are free
    to be themselves. Get with it ppl. Stop spreading this bs about Black Women, and women in general. It’s all about respect, promote that please.

    • If black women feel inferior because white men won’t date them, then they are the ones with the issue, as attraction cannot be forced. If the dating habits of any ethnic group are unfair to black women, I would think that black men would be mostly to blame for dating out of their race.

      I am white and in my entire lifetime I have only been attracted to maybe a couple black women but I wouldn’t date them anyway.

      • Starr Jonez

        The key point in your statement is “IF”. Why is it the woman’s fault if society (media, structures and internalized subconcious of most people) is constantly telling her she’s unattractive? Of course you can believe you are attractive, and not what society says–it doesn’t change the reality. Obviously it doesn’t come down to “feeling inferior” for every black woman. The last sentence of your comment adds nothing to anything.

  • If this article is a snapshot of how Black women think and view of themselves, if the survey is legit, then that means BW need an self-esteem over hall. Black women need to stop looking in all the wrong places for self esteem building. We have to remember that we live in a society that is dominated by Western culture, ideals, values, and norms. No, we are not popular, and don’t expect to be even with some and I say some Black men. But that doesn’t mean by nature we are not of great quality, value, or importance. We, as Black women, mistakenly equate popularity with quality. We should not do that to ourselves. A prime example of why this thinking is faulty, look at the current music scene. Think of a list of no talent singers and entertainers out here and think of how popular they are and not think of the artists who you know are far more talented and their work is of high quality and they are nearly unknown and not even appreciated for their work. My point exactly. Remember, no human being could get to the planet without a Black woman. If you don’t get that comment, look at the history of humankind. Next, a quiet kept secret in the medical and science community shows and proves that we produce higher levels of hormones–that guy who put out that article that stated Black women were the most unattractive woman based on her producing more testosterone didn’t tell you this fact. His research also failed to mention that we are one of the few racial/ethnic groups on the planet that produce higher estrogen levels–more so than White women and Hispanic Women. Our counterparts in producing high estrogen levels are Asian women (hence, considered by some the most feminine women on the planet). So, now what does that make us? I leave that to you to answer. Furthermore, BW typically display sexual characteristics that is considered highly desirable on a woman–full lips, high cheek bones, full and round hips, and an hourglass or pear shape frame (when we are in good shape). We, as Black women, have our own unique look, features, body plan, and we should play that up and not down. We have our own market, and we should appeal to that market. We fail when we try to appeal to a market that is not our own. Just because a man is Black, doesn’t automatically put him in your market and if he is non-Black doesn’t automatically mean he is not in your market. Not telling you who to date, just simply stating the facts. I know I am long winded, but I just wanted to let it out. We are whining and crying over men-who is not in our market (i.e. Black, White, Asian) and we ignore the men in our market(i.e. Black, White, Asian) and we are trying to physically alter our appearance and behaviors and what not to appeal to men who are not in our market. That is wrong. We need to start thinking more like a business. Seriously. For example, Bentley’s do not compete with BMW’s. American muscle cars do not compete with luxury cars. If a person likes luxury cars, no matter how much you jazz up the sports car, the person is not going to want it because it is not a luxury car brand. Some people prefer American muscle over luxury cars. Some prefer sports cars over luxury cars. No group is better than the other, just different. The Bentley corporation knows its market and appeals to its market to be competitive with others in its class. The same with Dodge. Dodge competes with others in its class to compete in the same market. My point, White women, Black women, Asian women, etc… are not in the same class, and, therefore, do not share the same market- we typically have a different phenotype (their are some exceptions), we are not the same on a genetic or biological level, or culturally (some of us are not as acculturated into the dominant American culture as others in our ethnic group). Therefore, it is a lie when many men say that we are the same and they are wrong when they make comparisons. Men know we are not the same, they don’t consider us the same, this is nonsense they say to us to make us more compliant to what they want. In other words, be the best that you can be, know your assets and build on them, offer that unique brand of you within your class. Thus, If there is some competition for men, which I don’t think there is any, it should be with those in my class-other Black women. Non-Black women are simply associates, friends, mates, hang out buddies, etc…I see them as no competition based on our differences and experiences and culture. Even in attitudes. Attitudes are subjective–at least the perception of one’s attitude. Also, attitude is shaped by culture and experience. To expect for the Black woman to have the same attitude (i.e. outlook of the world, life, mental disposition) as an Asian or White woman is completely asinine and ridiculous. Also, many BM go overboard and a lot of times it is due to their own brand of chauvinism to accuse the majority of BW having bad/negative attitudes. Good attitude to certain Black men who attack BW for their attitudes means women you are–submissive. For many of these men, to even buck their perceived authority is having a “bad attitude”. Yes, there are emasculating BW and BW who can go to far with the verbal whip lashing, and who can be a over the top–I met them–I will admit there are many of them. But to generalize it to the overwhelming majority of BW is nonsense. The overwhelming majority are not these sassy emasculating women. Most of us tend to speak our mind, we are not going to O.K. everything you do, we are not followers, and we are more likely to be more confronting with you on what we do not like–we are assertive but not domineering. These men, are really saying they do not like assertive women. They want a woman to O.K. them, follow their lead all the time, and submit. If you don’t do that, you have a “bad attitude”. Anyway, Black women, you are in a different class (no better or worst) from the rest and each group (ethnic/racial) of women have their own market(men who find them attractive). Discover your market(men who love, date, have relationships with, and marry Black women) because you do have a market–a considerable size. And Black men still top the list of being your “buyers”. Don’t let junk statistics from secondhand sources, media, and some disgruntled BM fool you. Black men just like Black women have a choice of who they want to marry and reproduce with just like you. And the overwhelming majority still choose the BW. And that says a lot about the BW considering the popular negative depiction of her. So, appeal to your market. Don’t worry about others who are not in your market and don’t worry about how big or small your market is as long as there is enough in your market, and there is, you will be fine. Love yourself.

  • Uh, the majority of Black American men are not dating or married to other races of women or white women. The majority of Black American men are married to Black Women. In fact, the recent 2013 American Families Survey of the U.S. Census Bureau points this out. Also, a team of Black professors posted an article I think in 2012 and 2013 to bust this myth out of the water. Please post more accurate information and stop “playing” on the insecurities of Black women.

  • Chris Rock said it correctly when he said, “Black women don’t date white men because they’re not attracted to white men. Oh they’ll date a pretty white boy…”
    I’m not attracted to them, period.

  • Thaalia

    After speaking to 6 black women between the ages of 25-40 most state that they
    believe a white man would not be attracted to them because of their
    voluptuous bodies.

    Did anyone else see that? Out of 6 PEOPLE? Man you really did extensive research, highly scientific!

    • Starr Jonez

      6, and they’re all best friends, probably siblings. my theory.

  • jonny

    Are you kidding me? Black women are all over me.


    (sigh) an age-old debate it seems. Insecurities or victimization, Black Women will forever be under a microscope when it comes to our relationship choices.

  • am

    For me the 5th reason is why I never have been in a serious relationship with a white guy. I have dated many of them but I never got that great chemistry like I have with black guys. If I see a black man who is nicely built or is confident and his skin is nice and he has pretty teeth I’m all over him. But I don’t have that same attraction to white guys.

  • H Town Psych

    Sorry but I am 100% SICK of woe is me, black women are doomed to be alone stories. Also there is NOTHING scientific about asking 6 of your friends about their dating histories. When the author tries to offer data, it is WRONG. “The majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race.” WHAT? That is actually false. Most current census data show that 1/5 newly married black men int he U.S. married a non-black woman. Like the person below me pointed out, that is MUCH fewer than other races of men. So please stop perpetuating that lie. At the end of the day black women SHOULD be open minded in terms of dating, focus on making themselves the best woman they can be, and just LIVE.

  • LoMo

    Why does it say that “the majority of black men marry outside of their race”??? This is NOT true. That is a false statement, and black women need to stop buying into that BS. If you are attracted to someone GO FOR IT. Whether he is black, white, green. All this other nonsense is created by society.

  • truthurts

    Could the reason be that Black women just do not find white men attractive? I am one of them and I was born and bred in Europe. Also, white men are insecure and inadequate in many ways. On the other hand, Black men, through their reputation of being erm..highly potent (?) get chased by women of all races. I fail to see what black men find so appealing in white or asian women for example: They have disgusting body shapes, age terribly and the offspring they produce are just downright ugly, Black babies on the other hand are the most beautiful on the planet. Sadly Black men cannot see further than their c$@£, We need to educate our sons!!!

  • Alipop

    This article reads more like an article on “why black women aren’t good enough to date white men”. It paints us as terribly insecure and completely subject to the whims of others with very little agency of our own. It also starts from a base of gross stereotypes of both black people and white people as it’s foundation from which it builds upon. I strongly disagree with this perspective.

  • I really hope I am not the only one that finds this article utterly stupid. I am dating a white man, and for the majority of my life I have dated outside of my race, I do not have a type that I prefer to date, I date what approaches me and who will treat me the way I expect to be treated. I grew up in an all white neighborhood and up until high school I went to schools where the dating pool really did not consist of a lot of black men. I have found throughout my 43 years on this earth that I am more likely to be approached by white men than black men not sure why that is, since I do have a large number of black friends. I think we as people need not to always look at things in terms of color, I am not saying that racism is not alive and kicking these days but I think life is to short to say I am only going to date a certain type of person, date who makes you happy and who treats you with respect. Men are men no matter what color they are.

  • Many white men find a woman that are alot like their moms. Mom is what most males learn how to relate to a woman from birth. My son married a woman who was about my size, same long dark hair and same skin color. Men I think are more geared towards looking for a woman who acts and looks more like Mom! My son dated different races but when it came down to having children, he says he wants his kids to look like him!

  • Rose colored glasses

    Can’t we all just get over it?!? Black white brown rich poor middle class, we are all human beings. This article is sad and racist.

  • Rummy389

    I just thought ya’ll were racist. I’m enlightened now.

  • BaldheadedFoo

    These days the best way to go is LATINA! They have the best of both worlds: a white woman’s hair and a black woman’s curves. Plus they tend to be more family-oriented and respectful toward the man as head of the household. as much as black women continue to gripe for generations about black men dating/marrying outside their race they have never bothered to look inward at their commonly perceived bad attitudes and lifestyles and continue to have character traits that are unappealing to ALL men. The bottom line is that anything truly marketable will sell itself and you will not have to plead, worry, or shame others into “buying” it.

    • “respectful toward the man as head of the household”. You do know we are living in 2013?

  • Bootyshaker14

    Then Black women need to become Lesbians and call it day. If you can’t get Black men, just do each other and everybody is happy. Personally, I like white men (not the old ones though. Blech).

  • I don’t agree with all the hype about white women. They are way over rated.

  • rp311

    The article stated that the majority of black men now marry outside their race. That is wrong. Only about 10 % marry outside their race and 8.5% of that is to white women. It is still alot higher than black women and white men but overall still low. The truth is when it comes to choosing a mate, most marry within their own race and why do we act like we shouldnt. it is natural and and beautiful. If you do happen to find someone outside race that makes you happy, thats ok too. But we all know that there are some black men ( and a few women) that want white because they think white is some sort of prize. They are the ones with identity and esteem issues. Not black women who just are not into white men and feel that most white men are not into them (not openly anyway) The one thing that some black women who want a black man can do is to look for that “good” black man and realize that he does not always have 30th floor office and drive a mercedes. That good man could drive a pick-up truck and work for the post office.

  • MissCamielle

    Who is this “we” you are referring to? I think a lot of black women just don’t put themselves in a position to be approached by white men. You just have to put yourself out there. A lot of white guys actually WANT to talk to us but they don’t know how we will react to them. I’ve actually dated MOSTLY white guys (I’m from NYC, maybe that makes a difference) and they love my body and my hair texture when I wore it natural. My ex was NOT keen on me trading my natural curls in for a silky straight weave. A good many white men find black women to be beautiful.

  • adanna

    All this is very sad. Im not hating on anything so .o one say so. Cause i used to b tht girl. Who only dated white guys, but when i started looking into my history a lot more i found i wanted nothing to do with white ppl men especially. Thanks to them the natural lively pedigree of black ppl is fvcked up. White ppl only dateblack ppl cause they think its so sacred n special. Most of the same reason. Theyclaim to be native americans. Its all fad and i just wanna say if u fall in with tht stay. When africa rises again and all the beauty of darkskin is in, stay here behind with your interracial kids n white spouses cause u or them are not welcome. reasom most claim to b native americsns

  • citizenrich

    How come black people don’t tip?

  • sherm

    A black woman don’t want to hear that! You are exposing them. Black women are moving away from black men and competing for white men against the white women. In turn white women in their anger will have sex with the dirtiest blackest guy they can find , and make sure that the white man who pissed her off see this.THIS IS PART OF THE WAR AGAINST THE SEXES and RACES.

  • JimmmyJAM

    Its a money thing with black woman. Why is it the ‘white’ man all the time? Sounds like they want to put this in a black man’s face. I never see black women and Asian men.I do see black men with fine Asian women though..and the brothers are learning to speak Spanish now.Somebody should put a book out for black men to get educated,because that’s where the power is! Rub some tanning lotion on his pink pork looking butt..don’t let yer white man leave the house looking like that!

  • Dreadlocked Lawyer

    Any cute white girls over there,for a dark skinned 6’2″ 250lbs brother? Dread locked and studying law? Hobbies tennis and horseback riding.

  • Zuri

    I would love to date a white men but I’m afraid to ask one out. And they don’t come to me either so what to do.

  • As a white woman, if I say I would date a black man, I am considered racist. If I say I am not attracted to black men, I am a racist. Frankly, I am attracted to white and Latin men. Black women don’t need an excuse, they can date who they like as everyone should. Asian almost always stay in their race, especially Asian men, and no one picks the reasons apart. Let’s be happy it is no longer illegal, and let’s be thankful it is hardly scandalous when blacks and whites date. I applaud black women for being comfortable in their bodies, I have hated my body since I was a child, and I am within in the normal weight for my height.

  • Liberal Conservative

    Stupid Article.

  • When black racists get their own website?

    • Ah, the beacon of enlightenment has spoken!

  • NO. 4; how stupid are you. You listed in NO. 3 black brains but your dumbdown education is showing.
    Hispanics are white people, Moron; their ancestry comes from Europe. The birthplace and home of the whites.
    Check and if you can actually comprehend grade school geography and world history; you should have learned this.

  • Osofoxley

    My fiance approached me nearly 5 years ago. I wasn’t attracted to him,I’m no stranger to dating outside of my race. But over time we grew on each other and he loves my two boys and wants to get married this summer. He proposed last New Years Day. I love him,we’re always traveling together with the boys and we get hella white people staring and whispering. But, he could care less.

  • Osofoxley

    My fiance approached me nearly 5 years ago. I wasn’t attracted to him,I’m no stranger to dating outside of my race. But over time we grew on each other and he loves my two boys and wants to get married this summer. He proposed last New Years Day. I love him,we’re always traveling together with the boys and we get hella white people staring and whispering. But, he could care less.

  • anon

    This whole article was based on the writer’s discussions with six people. These are some ridiculous generalizations to be made based on the opinions of six people.

  • jacky frost

    Well, I’m a white guy, and never thought of myself as ‘hung’, not like the movies, but most women are only so large themselves. I always blew off all that stuff as BS. If black guys are bigger, its never handicapped me.

    So far as race goes I really like women.

  • I would like to address the fallacy of ” if you are white you got it made”. There isn’t an all white inclusive club where if you are white you are handed money and status. When we are born we don’t get put into a a gold baby carriage filled with $100 bills while we get taken to the country club. Some rich white people are equal opportunity @ssholes who treat whites and blacks like crap. Trust me on this on.

  • It is a misnomer that white guys like stick thin women. Most white guys like curves on their women…..

  • Hmmm … do you have an article on why white guys don’t approach /date black women? Answers might surprise.

  • Sinclair

    This “expert” only asked 6 people. I’m thinking a true survey needs more that the girls in the grocery store line to be unbiased. This chick is just trying to divide the races even more. Yes there are issues but they are more indepth than is my hair the wrong texture for a white man to love! Serioulsy?!?

  • janegood

    I hate these stupid articles written by stupid people who want to put all Black women in a box! Why don’t you people, just jump off a bridge and be done with it!

  • Bren

    That is false! It is a myth that bm have bigger ones than wm/nbm. There is no evidence to prove such a statement. Maybe the men in pornos do (because they have to be big enough to audition for the parts…and they get paid). I love how people claim to know things without seeking for themselves. Ignorance shall remain alive.

    • j a sassy

      black men have bigger D’s than wm.. it is a proven fact… from way back to adrica and jamaica.. why do you think your ww always running ver here to sex virile blk men….you can say wm hav big ones too is a big whatever and a lie…. but i care not to go on a hunt for a big w D!!

      • Mike Smith

        YEAH….its true and I can PROVE IT!!!!: Thats why white me are notorious for ORAL make up for what they lack. Anyway, let them cross over to the other side,let the white man deal with it.He will have a little black educated nappy-head that he can screw when ever he wants!

      • Steven Hamilton-Healey

        Lol no it isnt, its just because you didnt pay attention at school and your mother failed to instill an education and common sense into you. Not proven fact at all. Only proven fact for burkino faso, congolese and sudanese males.

      • Jo Ca

        Black men have lower IQ’s.

  • educateyourself

    THIS IS THE DUMBEST article I’ve ever read. WHAT kind of research is THIS?

  • CC

    I think we can agree that everyone has their own preference and opinion. NEXT!!!

  • enoni pond

    who the hell wants to date a racist white guy ,if hes not his family is omg,,so many other colors to date

  • This is bullshit

    Just not attracted to whites? That is jus as ridiculous as someone saying all black girls are unattractive.

  • Goalie shark

    This story is bull S**t . I know of many guys who try to ask out black girls. The only point that makes any sense is the “swag” statement. That is because many black girls suffer from the same disease that white girls often have, “The liking jerk disease”. In today’s society often nice guys are seen as week. There has even been a recent psychological study that shows that women prefer pictures of men who have an angry or brooding expression on their faces over smiles. This says something f-ed up about the way women view men.

  • Pingback: White Women. | love.african!()

  • Stop asking Black American men to be different than
    ALL other men in the industrialized world. It’s not going to happen.
    Black men have absolutely nothing to be ashamed about. Black women love white guys???
    Black women looking for white men??? black women loving white men???_______blackwhiteplanet.com______ is the #1 black women
    white men dating site. No one night stand. serious relationship

  • Kristina Chin

    I’m a young black woman who has dated both black and white men, and I feel that this article is only a feeder into an idea that the black community has been trying to fight off for years: racism!
    Why are you encouraging the idea of making relationships based on something as shallow as race in the first place! It would be a different story if the article were about encouraging black women to give people outside our race a try!
    I think that race isn’t the problem: it’s culture that is the thing that creates the barrier between other races interacting with each other.
    The only relevant point I saw was how you said black women aren’t approached by white men: if that is true, why is it that we aren’t? It is a location factor? Do we really not become acquainted with white men frequently enough to get a white man interested? What?

    AND not only that; but where in the world did you GET this information in the first place?
    Where are your sources? how did you make your case study? are these current statistics backed up by findings from a credible source, or did you just get some random black women off the street to ask why they don’t date white guys?

    Please stop making a fool out of yourself and other women by sharing ideas that are shameful and insecure.

    • I agree that choosing a person based on race is shallow. B/c I don’t believe different races exist. However, I do agree there are different “breeds” or “kinds” or “types” of human beings. And, race can be a proper scientific term to use to describe these differences in human beings, I just prefer to use another word, b/c the word race implies to me total separation of different human groups. As if we are not all connected to the same human ancestors and have not always intermingled and connected with one another. It’s not the most accurate term to describe us as human beings. Anyway, that is something else to talk about. However, I can understand the desire to date within your “kind” due to genetic and biological preferences that you may desire for your offspring to have for themselves. For example, you will find African Americans desire to be with African Americans and others predominately of African ancestry b/c they do not want to decrease the number one or best protection from the UVA/UVB radiation from the sun–Melanin. Melanin contributes to the protection of your body’s cells, protection from various diseases, and protection of your reproduction functions as well. Also, many African Americans desire for their children to have particular phenotypes more typically found among people predominately of African ancestry (more specifically, Western and West-Central African)-full lips, wide nose, brown or dark skin, and curly, kinky hair–contrary to popular belief, you do have many African Americans who do desire to have their children to look “Black”. However, you are 100% correct that the main dividing factor is CULTURE. I think culture acts more as a barrier combined with negative experiences with other ethnic groups (i.e. Black/White), that it can even outweigh differences based on race.

  • guest

    No, there’s not a lot of scientific evidence. The evidence says when both are hard, they average the same. And women do really care. No one wants a 4 inch anything. Don’t fool yourself.

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    • MsTG416

      Nice comment. Thanks for saying this.

  • cerenate

    Black women, I am here to tell you, White men LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Black women. They’re just shy and scared of getting rejected. Smile, flirt, touch their shoulders or arms, whatever. They’ll come in like Flynn.

  • Ernest

    The truth about ‘white guys don’t approach black women’ is simply because so many white guys are rejected by by black women that they just do not want to try. If black women showed openness to dating outside their race, things would certainly change.

  • justsayn

    I’m a white guy and always wanted to see what dating a black chick would be like. The problem is, I think there is just way too much of a cultural divide for a guy from the sticks like me to date an urban black girl nearby where I work. I start thinking about how If we dated, I’d have to hang with her friends and family that may not like the fact that shes dating a white guy. (racism goes both ways in both communities) . Also, I’m pretty damn “white” in my attitude. I always kinda thought that might be boring to a black girl. this is what kept me from approaching black chicks.

  • Rob

    First of all, six women is an extremely small sample rate, and amazingly enough, there is no mention of asking white men for their input on this matter. Most of the article can be summed up into just one reason–some white men are not attracted to the unique features of black women. I, for one, could care less about race, and in fact am dating a black woman now, for reasons that have nothing whatsoever to do with material things such as race or looks. However, I will honestly say that many other white men might add three additional reasons. Lack of compatibility or agreement as regards social or public behavior, as many black women are perceived, are portrayed, or specifically are inclined to act out in very dramatic ways, is probably the biggest. Outright racism, if not the biggest reason in some places, could be a close second–and by this, I mean anything from white racist thinking to the subtle or unintentional classism associated with racial issues in this and many other countries. The last reason is touched on in the article–lack of compatible or similar backgrounds–but could also be related to the aforementioned classism in the minds of some people. In turn, there are problems with racism within the black community as well. To many people, but especially to many black people, a half-black, half-white child runs the risk of being confused about their identity, or being stared at, suffering from differentiation by either or both communities, etc. This thinking is symptomatic of ongiong and festering racism in this country; and even if any of these concerns proved true, they would do so within such a racist atmosphere. Indeed, it is sad that MLK’s dream has yet to come true; but I’d argue for something greater–a society free of racism and associated classism, in which our individual preferences are for those who identify with and signed on to be a part of the HUMAN race. It starts within each of us.

  • Many black women have had this white D. And love it, and still call me til today.

    This is just a racist post, by someone mad that a white man got their woman.

    Guess black guys aren’t all that after all huh?
    But what IS true, is black men LOVE white women, more than their own black women.

    Why? well.. have you spent time with a black woman before? They don’t take much crap, and black guys are usually full of it. The darker the skin the fuller of crap, it doesn’t mean deeper African roots.

  • Many black women have had this white D. And love it, and still call me til today.

    This is just a racist post, by someone mad that a white man got their woman.

    Guess black guys aren’t all that after all huh?
    But what IS true, is black men LOVE white women, more than their own black women.

    Why? well.. have you spent time with a black woman before? They don’t take much crap, and black guys are usually full of it. The darker the skin the fuller of crap, it doesn’t mean deeper African roots.

  • disqus_XLPaQHw6sR

    I have dated many white men in the past because I lived in a predominantly white community in my teens and twenties. However there were many issues in the relationship and many white men who approached me only wanted to fullfil a fantasy or check something off their bucket list. ‘slept with a black woman, check.’ It was easy to know how serious they were early on when they would avoid contact with their friends and family and didn’t particularly show interest in my life, friends, hopes dreams ect.. After many years of being kept at arms length by white men, I lost interest in them. There were black men around but they would dismiss me many times to my face. “I don’t date black women!” There were tons of black women with black children and no man around. But when you saw a black man with his kid (s) they were usually mixed. It was a sick culture and I had to get out. I am still searching for my black or brown prince.

  • vognick

    ummmm because they’re stupid? Only reasonable explanation….it’s like refusing to take a Bentley when it’s offered to you because you just have to stick with that old plymouth fury

  • Jack Elam

    There’s a multitude of reasons.

    #1 The black women would have to learn proper English. Everyone knows that “ebonics” is just an excuse for sloppy grammatical skills, being to lazy to learn the language or maybe they just feel this vocal idiocy makes them look cool & gives them special a rebellious identity.

    #2 They wouldn’t be able to allowed to be so obnoxious in public just trying to get attention.

    #3 They couldn’t rotate their heads on their shoulders while opening their eyes wide as possible in a stupid arrogant attempt to show their “serious” or “I’s keepin’ it REAL!”.

    #4 They’d have to bathe everyday.

    #5 They would have to learn the meaning of “being humble”.

    #6 They would have to learn proper manners & customs.

    #7 And they would have to quit blaming everyone else for their problems.

    Other than that, maybe black women would consider dating unworthy & lowly white men.

  • Tbh, some of my best relationships have been with dudes who were of the Caucasian persuasion. Gotta admit, I’m a sucker for European guys, especially from Italy, Greece, France or Spain. Beautiful men who in my experience, seem to have a lot less hang ups on race when it comes to approaching me and dating a woman of color in general.

    I don’t discriminate. I love all men. Some I may prefer a bit more than others but race is never a deal breaker for me; with all the great men of a variety of cultures and flavors, I say if he treats you right and he’s fine, give it a try. Life is way too short to limit yourself. <3

  • bhappy

    I am happily married to a handsome tall white man. No one should limit their options. I never have. Men of all races are very attracted to black women. It is just sooo sad that there are many(not all) black women who have low self esteem and limit themselves. Many lonely black women will then say, “I’m only attracted to black men.” I don’t buy it for a minute! Then these same women get angry when they are at social gatherings and black men dance with other races (I’ve heard the complaints). I think to myself…”Black men are enjoying their options, you need to explore yours.” Black women need to stop worrying about who black men are dating. Meanwhile, they are standing on the sidelines bitter and lonely, missing out on potential true love.

    • This is nonsense to think BM are just so totally and completely free in exploring their options. At least for long term relationships and marriage/family, BM are not. Men, in general, categorize women for how they will utilize them. Dancing with other races of women at a dance is not the same as being open to exploring options for marriage and family. Black men, in fact, are very limited/prejudiced in their options when it comes to who they create their families. Despite the fact that BM may date out more than BW and have more experiences with having sex with women of other races, and/or have higher IR marriage rates(which is not as high as people make it out to be), the OVERWHELMING MAJORITY of BM still marry and create families with Black Women. Their pattern is consistent with other ethnic groups of men. Men, in general, with the exception of Asian men, are more likely to date, have sex with, and/or marry other races of women at slightly higher rates than their female counterparts in their own ethnic group. However, ALL MEN still marry within their own race the majority of the time. The overwhelming majority of BM choose BW to marry and create their families. This is a fact. I know BM who have had dating experiences with other races of women and married Black women and created families with them. I know of BM who deal with other races of women for a “good time”, but prefer BW when it comes to their serious relationships and having children. Also, it is not a lie that you have BW who are only attracted to BM. Just b/c you aren’t doesn’t mean they are like you who thinks contrary to them.

  • dawnnkm

    awww, that’s sweet, I hope it does work out for you. LOL, you don’t sound dumb, you sound HONEST.

  • Really, the majority of white men don’t find the majority of black women attractive, either in personality or physically. Yes there are a few that are the exception. They are few and far between.

    • LuluDeb

      lol probably where you live…

  • Joseph

    Pale white girls rule this country….

  • Joseph

    Black women do not date white men because white men have not interest in black women.Nothing could be more beautiful than a pale white chick!!

  • I agree with ‘inlove’. I date white men and they have not had the same hang ups about complexion and hair texture that the black men I dated did. I do not have a relaxer, I wear weaves and twist outs, etc. When a question was asked aboutmy hair,Itook him to e local beauty supply. No more questions. With that being said I believe real men are attracted to confidence. Be yourself. Love yourself and a confident man who finds you intriguing will do anything he has to in order to get next to you!

  • Guest


  • Crawford

    Had you put item 5 at the top, you could’ve save a lot of the “Sociology 101” that pads out the rest of the article, imo of course! I am a white male and it has been my perception that, as a general rule, black women are eithernot attracted to white men, or that they think that we see only the colour and not the person within.

  • they are racist

  • dave

    Out of all the races you can marry black men and women chose the race that has caused are people nothing but pain and misery. I’m sorry but if you lay next to a race that has done nothing but disrespect and spit on the very ground your ancestors were born on you are pathetic. White people have no respect for black people or this planet it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this out. How we earn their respect is being becoming there equals money wise and education not kissing their asses like we have been doing for 200 years. I’m done, I will never date or marry white and disrespect my ancestors or my family.

    • Dave, people like you are most likely the dudes on the news flash mobbing stores causing us to be disrespected. Closeminded fool.

  • bonita

    You sound stupid.

  • aster won

    this article is garbage and wrong on just about every aspect, imo.

  • smps76

    Not sure what “white” really means anymore. I am a “white” guy who is half Mexican. I am married to a Puerto Rican that has some black ancestry. We have a beautiful child and to be honest, I’m not sure why they’re racial barriers in dating (assuming you aren’t biased or racist). You see a person you like, go for it and try and meet them. If you’re lucky you’ll have something in common, but to stay away from people of another race based on stereotypes? I don’t know. That to me seems like a sad reason to miss out on meeting some very interesting people. Just an opinion.

  • I think it might be a factor of whether or not you were raised in heavily black culture. Black women who mostly hang out with white people likely find relationships with white men more easily.

  • Dolmance

    I normally wouldn’t answer this because it’s kind of a woman’s thread, but I feel like i must say something. I’m kind on in years, but I had a long relationship with a black woman back in the early 70’s, who told me there were a whole lot of white guys out there that just don’t notice black women. Anyway, she was beautiful. And she was offended. I checked it out. Those white guys were either racists or gay or both.

    Obama’s President. Now we can all date each other. It’s a whole new world. And we’re never going to get rid of our racial insanity until we all start getting with each other, for real. And then we’ll all look like Brazilians and our descendents will be very, very happy about that too because Brazilians are very, very, very good looking.

    • No disrespect, but I have no desire for all of us to look like Brazilians. I like the features and the beauty of African Americans. Not hating on Brazilians or anyone with that look. I just love my self, my heritage, my culture, and the legacy of my people. Nothing wrong with looking and being African American.

  • dave

    When I was in college I saw a movie called Birth of a Nation it promoted racism and surpisingly the streotypes of black men in that film are the same they use today. Even though it was created in the 1930s and times have changed I guess….I was still disgusted because they depicted black men as drooling animals who craved white women. Since I experienced racism going to a white school and now that I saw it in films. I decided until racism is gone for good in America I wont feel comfortable dating a white women. I’m not sure about black women but do you really feel comfortable dating white after seeing millions of racist tweets and race riots of 2012.

  • Um, that’s not true that most Black men are married to White women. Where did this person get their stats from? And this whole thing is based off of only 6 Black women? They couldn’t do a larger study? It doesn’t matter to me regardless, since I have dated mainly White and Latin men since I seem to be the most attracted to them (especially Latin men), but that marriage “fact” is WAAAY off. Look up the statistics on interracial marriage in this country, and you will see that over 90 percent of Black men marry Black women.

  • I am African ,and I will tell you that Africans are one of the most educated group in the U.S. Education is very impt to us. I think black women need to stop holding themselves back these things are listed not imp that the author listed to hold you back from dating white men. There are lot of white men out there open to dating black girls. Don’t waste you time waiting for black men who are dating white girls.

  • NicPal

    Number one is the truth but the irony is in earlier centuries especially those that (African Americans were in slavery European American women were thicker and in addition made their clothing fuller to model after African American women bodies because they were intimidated by our “thickness” in certain areas) I could go on with that ideology but that would be a dissertation so I’ll just end it right there. In addition; if you look at art from the 16th, 17th and 18th centuries you will see pictures of European American women who are just as thick or thicker then African American women. Its just interesting that being “skinny” is the pattern of today but maybe 200 years ago in this country it was not. Just food for thought:)

    • I wouldn’t call this European American women “thick”. If they were, they wouldn’t have been modeling our body types. I would say they were much more of a healthier weight, but they were always known to be “slender” built–not very curvy or full in certain areas.

  • Matthew Sarad

    But ladies remember… pick the right guy. Men can be disrespectful users. If you target men with college degrees you will usually get a higher quality person.

  • Matthew Sarad

    If you’ve walked the streets of Hollywood lately you’ll see a lot of white men walking down the street with black women. It’s increasingly popular. White men like black women… black women can have better overall attitude toward men.

  • DTGallday

    most ignorant list ive ever read in my entire life… no lie

  • Latrice

    “Black men have made it no secret their liking to white women.” This is such a broad generalization of black men. What sort of ‘study’ was conducted to come up with this nonsense? I can’t speak for my entire race or gender, but my only qualification for dating is that the person (regardless of race) treats me respectfully and that I enjoy his/her company. Of course, it is only natural that aesthetics play a role, but attractiveness comes in all races. I don’t think most black men think “Yeah, gotta get me a white woman” and purposely reject black women. I think they like the person, there is an attraction for various reasons regardless of their race. It’s 2012, we need to date whomever we want and stop self-segregating in all areas of our lives.

    • I may disagree with your push to tell other people that we need to date whomever we want. If people want to self-segregate, that is also a choice. We don’t need to swirl. If that is your choice, that’s you–no need to push it on everyone else.

  • Tom

    I am a Latin American male who dates all races. My last two girlfriends were Black women. Before that, Japanese, and before that White. As far as Black Ladies hair goes, I love the different combinations that these ladies can do with their hair and have no problem with them deciding to go natural when they need a break from the amount of effort it takes.
    The only thing a “non Black” male needs to adjust to is the fact that if your girl changes her hair, you had better notice and give her a compliment because she went through a lot of trouble for it. Praise her for her efforts and tell her she is beautiful. Hmm, I think that applies to all races.

  • Keelay_17

    Jesus Christ. People have the freedom to love who they please. It’s just breaks my heart that nobody can do that without being ridiculed about it. Society has gotten to a point where the judgement never stopps. At the end of the day it’s left to us to do what we believe, even if others don’t agree. I am a young black female, and I’m from NYC. I honestly don’t see why race matters in dating or in anything.

    • youngblackman

      Why are you even here then? Go read a “colorblind” blog dominated by the rich whites in NYC.

  • I hate that term. It’s just my preference. The look, the eyes, the
    confidence, and sometimes the cocky/flirty attitude catches my
    am beautiful woman and I love good man…..inter racial romance is my dream… so I
    joined —blackwhitePlanet.С0M—–it’s where to- connect with
    beautiful and excellent people! I just feel more natural and comfortable being around them.
    When a black woman rubs up against me I just melt. Anyway, keep an open
    mind cause we are out there. More than you think.

  • MadameD

    Black woman here who’s happily married to a handsome white man. He is the first white man I’ve dated. I normally dated black men and I’ve dated one or two hispanics. It just so happened that the man who was made for me happened to be white =)

  • Starsky

    I am a white male & I think some of the reasons are not stated here. At least in my experience, alot of it has to do w/ how family perceives you, even when you get along great. If you are confident, a productive person, have a good physique & have a little bit of respect, I find most black women can be very attracted. In fact, it’s easier for me to talk to black women(most of the time anyways) then white women & I don’t know why, but it always turns out that way.

    Also, I don’t buy the “it’s tougher because I’m black thing”, it *can* be, but saying that as a universal maxim sets up for failure. Life is tough, period. It hits very hard & it doesn’t care who. If you disagree, I’d like to hear from you!

    I also think one of the reason *some* white men are unattractive is they act black instead of just being themselves around women. I really don’t know why because this is stupid. The greatest impediment I have found to relationships, is either family, specifically males & if it’s a predominately black neighborhood & your the only white person there you can get some stares, but once again mostly from the males & women don’t seem to have a problem. This is just my personal experience.

    • Starsky

      Oh & also, I like the hair(although I prefer it long, I like straight hair, “nappy”, just something other than super-short hair….& I think black women pull off short hair better than most others), the butt, & *prefer* women who take care of themselves physically, in good physical shape, that says something about the mindset. That is in a purely physical side, but I like someone who is fun & enjoy listening to them! It’s also ok to be pick on the other side. If I were a black woman I wouldn’t want a white guy if the dude was a whimp, lacked drive etc. Its ok to have some baseline requirements & if the guy gets butthurt about it, then maybe he isn’t for you!

  • mike p

    Mike P I have dated white woman and black woman. had more fun and a better time dating black woman I don’t know why but I felt like I could be myself. as for their body I love all their curves and how they look and their hair it doesn’t bother me. its their hair let them ware it how they want. as for education I barely finished high school. but I do have a good job that I like. I got into a triad. so anyone can do anything they set their mind to. I feel. but it is hard to meet a good black woman to ask her out. wish I could find one. been looking

  • W.

    I am a black caribbean woman. My fiance is white american. This article is straight up bull! lol This is very wrong. My finace DOES appreciate curves, my culture, and my hair. Secondly there are many educated black women that hold bachelors and masters degrees. This article is bias and weird.

  • Kurisupisu

    The last I heard was that love was color blind…………

  • just_be_honest

    i myself dated a few black women in my life. I didn’t see them for the color of their skin. I think that if another person from a different race likes or even loves someone else from a different race then go with it. If I could date someone from another race that accepted me fror who I am as a person on the inside and not by how I look, life would be easier for us all.

  • besides

    lol about the hair comment. i would tell a man about my hairstyle and ask him if he wanted to feel it (other races) then tell him about my up and coming hairstyle for the following week. you would be suprised of the interest the show. also how easy it is for them to understand it the first time.

  • ginger

    we are different do to environmental differences! I find black women to be very attractive. I have very light features and the opposite attracts to me. I like poofy hair on a black woman! Fake hair or bald or dreads never worked for me. When I see a chocolate girl with a tight little poofy fro and all those curves and pretty brown eyes… its just gets this ginger excited 😉

  • TJ

    As a white (italian american) guy, this article just reminds me of how happy i am to date only white women. Oh, and ”reason” number 5 was completely disgusting. Yes, complain that white men do not approach black women, but yet mention how black women are just not attracted to white men at all. Trust me, there are not many white men out there that are attracted to black women, and clearly your own black men agree with us, so you have nothing to worry about.

    • LuluDeb

      ” there are not many white men out there that are attracted to black women, and clearly your own black men agree with us, so you have nothing to worry about.”

      i guess you didn’t read the comments on here of black women that have dated or are married to white men and white guys that say they are attracted to black women and have dated them. Stay in your status quo way of living and stay in the lane society and the media tells you to if you want to but don’t project your unfounded assumptions on entire groups. Oh and putting down black women because others do? You are truly a man of honor, aren’t you? Stay classy!

  • Sam Kleine

    This is wrong I am white and many girls that I have dated have been black.

  • White/Mexican boy right here!

    Tbh: i love black women! !!!! The most beautiful females in the world!!!! Im,White/Mexican, so any black women intrested get at me!!! I
    Only attracted to black women, the only.females ill obly fall in love with!! Thank god for black women!!!(:

  • White boy


    This is a quote from another comment on the website^^^

    And you wonder why you don’t get any opportunities

    • jack sprat

      Judging by the grammar and inappropriate use of texting lingo, I’d guess that that was written by a troll; 14-still w/his moms. Or an 11-year old girl in the suburbs. White, in any case. No black woman I know would be confused by that turkey.

  • Chill Dude

    I am a white guy who has dated women of all races and finds many women of different shapes, sizes and colors beautiful. But quite frankly, I’m not interested in why millions of women aren’t interested in me, I’m only interested in the ones who are. I believe you should develop you talents and cultivate your soul, and God will pair you eventually with the partner who you will make happy and who will make you happy. Don’t waste your life trying to figure out how to please everyone, just be a decent person and you will attract someone who loves you.

    • Very well put. That’s the perfect answer to EVERYTHING positive or negative that has been said.

  • Rob B.

    Ladies, this one is not hard to fix. Get in shape. All men notice a healthy female. That is a biological survival instinct we all posses. Be a well rounded person when it comes to education and current events. If you want a successful man, you better be able to carry a conversation.
    Go where open minded people hang out. This may take you out of your comfort zone, but if you go with a friend that has done it before, it will be easier. Leave your bad attitude in the trash, where it belongs. Smiling=looking approachable. Put the cellphone away! Watch your surroundings at all times. This should be done 24/7. It keeps you safe and will help you spot the 1 acceptable male who’s checking you out! This advice is not
    Race/ethnic specific. As white male who has dated outside may race, I have found that it works because when you look past skin color, we are all basically the same. There will always be people who don’t date outside their race, but you will find there are plenty of white guys that will as racial barriers dissolve. Many white women and black men are making nearly impossible for white males and black females to ignore each other!

    • LuluDeb

      I agree with your tips and I’d recommend them for men and women. Another important thing is that a person does all these things not just to attract someone but out of self love and self growth.

  • Rob B

    Hi Regina. I tried to leave you a response earlier. This may be a duplicate. Have a white female friend take you where some decent, open minded people hang out. Put a smile on and be observant to your surroundings. Location+looking approachable+watching for opportunity=success!
    If you”re out of shape, work out. Remember humans are similar to animals when it comes to mate selection. It”s a biological survival instinct for us to seek out healthy, fit mates to bring forth strong offspring. By the way you”re getting this info from a white male who has dated black women. We are out there!

  • rigand

    @Rob B, first and foremost its rather interesting how your advise to black women somehow sounds a bit patronizing. Let me say this that sometimes people who belong to the dominate segment of the U.S. society don’t realize that they are being racist. Note, not all black women are the same therefore your advise is unwarranted because there are plenty of black women that work out, eat well, smile and have a wonderful attitude. Apparently, your advise speaks volumes of an oversimplification and generalization of black women. Then you go on to tell them to get off the phone… and to go out and experience the world… as if there aren’t any whites out there that need that same kind of advise…. The ultimate offensiveness of your convoluted race ridden advise was to tell black women to stay away from where black men are? Let me say this, this is why black women should be cautious when dating white men… many, not all, cannot step away from being offensive… its as if these black women don’t have brothers and fathers who happen to be black men??

    Personally, I don’t necessarily have a problem with a black women dating a white guy. The only thing that crosses my mind is how does she do it… not because white men are disgusting or any of that…. its because of these kinds of insensitive comments that not only sometimes come out of their mouths but the possibility of one of their family member’s mouths. It takes a lot of guts and mental toughness to date someone that possibly will make comments such as the ones you just made… mind you, you prefer white women… maybe that explains why you are so insensitive. But, given you the benefit of the doubt… and not making you out to be this hood wearing racist… it takes a strong minded person to put aside comments that not only come out of your partners mouth but possibly one of their friends or family members.

    And, yes, at one time I dated white women… until I could no longer deal with the over generalizations made about members of my community… So, with all my dignity and self respect, I decided that its probably best to deal with issues of class, etc… then to be constantly feeling ambivalent and bothered because someone made an insensitive comment… you know… not everyone wants to be seen like they are making things up in their head… etc… think about it…

  • Rob B.

    Read the comment I left. I think you may find it useful. 2 quick easy tips: Find some white female friends and have them take you where open minded men hang out. 2nd, be observant to the guys around you. If you see an acceptable male checking you out, smile at him! I have seen many a black woman turn her head away when a white guy was looking. Maybe she was nervous, but it will shoot the guy down just the same. Not all white guys are interested in black women, but more and more are giving it a try as racial barriers dissolve and they see all the white girl/black guy relationships.

  • Rob B.

    As a white male who has dated both black and white females, I can tell you this. If you work out, eat right, smile, have a good a good attitude, get a decent education, get the phone off your ear and go out and experience all that life has to offer, you will have no problem with male attention. You don’ t have to have a masters degree or look like a supermodel, unless that is what you are seeking. I am preferential to white females, but I have seen some black women that were absolute knockouts! Stop hanging out where black males are as well. They are hypocrites and can get very aggressive when they see you with a white guy, even though they won’t hesitate to chase white girls. Lastly, lose the suspicious attitude when white guys approach you. Remember, they may be just as nervous as you are, but at least you know they’re not prejudiced!

  • Dirty Steve

    Yes, Black women are beautiful ! But how does a white guy approach her, I’ve tried the casual smile but they quickly turn there heads ? Shot down again.

  • Minx

    My mother is married to a white man, going on 19 years, and they’ve known each other since the 70’s, and they even told me recently she took his virginity O_O!! He LOVES black women and treats her like a queen, and helped raise me and my brother. Give the white guys a chance too ladies, you might be missing out.

  • Guest

    I totally disagree…I’m a black female and I like white guys because they have pretty eyes silky hair and they carry themselves differently than black guys. I dont like them for money because 1- I make my own (and a good amount) and 2- not every white man makes good money

  • paul

    typical rascist joker

  • black woman you are my african queen,
    black coffee no sugar no cream.
    love you black women.

  • Samantha

    Ok, this list is about the biggest bunch of drivel I’ve read on IR dating/black women. It’s clear who ever wrote this did NOT do their homework.

    Body Image: This is not as black/white as the writer makes it sound (no pun intended.) Yes BW are more curvacious but as the obesity rate rises, I don’t think it’s accurate to generalize like that.

    Hair: Again, don’t generalize. I’ve heard from some BW how their white SO or DH encouraged them to embrace their natural texture or appreciates their hair more than any BM they dated, so that one might just be in some BW’s heads.

    Background/Education: It’s well-known that women are going further in education than men, in all races but especially in the black and Latino communities. For some BW, non-BM are the only men they come in contact with on their same level, so it works both ways.

    No WM approaches: Not all men are the type to just approach a woman like that. At least that’s how it’s been in my experience. Some WM feel a little intimidated approaching BW or any woman for that matter. When you add race into it, it just makes it even more complicated so again, don’t generalize.

    BW just not into WM: This is the only reason that made sense to me. But I’ll just point out, WM are not the only men available that aren’t black. There’s Hispanic, Asian, Native American, Middle Eastern, a whole world out there. I think the key to IR dating is to just be open and don’t have any preconceived notions. Or try not to.

  • sebrana

    The look, the eyes, the confidence, and sometimes the cocky/flirty
    attitude catches my attention. I just feel more natural and comfortable
    being around them. When a black woman rubs up against me I just melt.
    Anyway, keep an open mind cause we are out there. ~ blackwhiteplanet _℃om ~~~~~ is for thousands of upscale men and beautiful
    women, who understand that ambition, success, and glamour are key elements of
    attraction. It’s worth a try! If a white man is good looking and successful he has the pick of many
    white and asian women and they will not necessarily think to approach a
    black women and probably wouldn’t even meet as many black women as
    white/asian women.

  • batk427

    @Mark Howard thank you. The blk women who are very interested in white guys needed to here this. I know my days of waiting for a blk prince charming are done. Time is slipping away too fast. I did try.

  • what?

    This made me feel like black women don’t date white men because they have low self esteem

  • Orly

    Out of a list of pathetic reasons to exclude a whole race of men, there has probably never been a more pathetic vomit of excuses ever committed to posterity.

  • Orly

    Out of a list of pathetic reasons to exclude a whole race of men, there has probably never been a more pathetic vomit of excuses ever committed to posterity.

  • Orly

    Out of a list of pathetic reasons to exclude a whole race of men, there has probably never been a more pathetic vomit of excuses ever committed to posterity.

  • This is so wrong. I’m not a black woman, but let me tell the black women out there that they are wrong about us white guys. WE DO like black women. The hair, the color, the curves. You are unique! White guys are shy to most women despite race. In most cases all you have to do is give a white guy the look that it’s ok and everything will fall into place. Yes, there’s a handful of white guys who are either too shallow or not interested, but a lot of us are interested. I’ll admit that when I enter a room full off mostly white women and one black woman, the black woman catches my eye immediately. No, it’s not jungle fever. I hate that term. It’s just my preference. The look, the eyes, the confidence, and sometimes the cocky/flirty attitude catches my attention. I just feel more natural and comfortable being around them. When a black woman rubs up against me I just melt. Anyway, keep an open mind cause we are out there. More than you think.

    • If there are some out there then howcome I cant find one for me :-

      • Regina what state are you in?

      • JPW

        LIke Mark said, white guys, like me, often prefer black women but are shy to approach, thinking they will not be interested or get mad. As a result we approach what we are used to, ( white women ) even though it is not what we prefer. Regina,show interest toward a white man you are interested in and watch the sparks fly!

    • nikole

      then where the hell are they cuz i am looking for love i would date a white boy but they seem to lacking in the department

    • Ashley

      True. Dating anyone has everything to do with who you are comfortable with, confidence, common interests, and of course physical attraction to certain features.

    • besides

      i agree. i like men, regardless of race. i have had white men hit on me and i have dated different races. i think they do like me because i am slim. i like them because they always have something to talk about that would be new for me. just a different lingo and attitude. for those who stick to their own race, you are selling yourself short.

    • TexasGal007

      Sooo true! I love your post. I’m a Black female who married a pretty fly White guy! LOL Well fly to me anyway, he pretty much said exactly what you said. Of course that was when we first met and started talking. We have now been married for 5yrs, been together for over six and have one super beautiful little girl. Might try for another one someday! He loves my curves, loves my natural hair. He loves everything about me and while I should admitt it to him more, I know he would lay down and die for me if need be. He has a whole lot of love in his heart and I am glad we are together. I’m a blessed woman! I dated a few other White men before him and they all told me y’all notice! 🙂

  • Cris

    The person who wrote this article is clearly a huge racist. Some white men do find black women attractive as do some black women find white men attractive. I actually see it all the time. Color does not dictate beauty, a person does, physically and emotionally.

  • FF

    I think white guys with brown hair, blue eyes and olive skin are the hottest on the planet! I also love Spanish guys (who are white)

  • trey

    its only 4 million black american man!

  • trey

    its only 4 million black american man!

  • Guest

    I get hit on by black women just as much as white women, I also live in St. Louis. This area is probably the most segregated left in the country. The southern part of the area is mostly white, and the northern part is mostly black. The point I am making is that even living in an area like this, I still find it hard to believe that a majority of black women are not attracted to white men.

  • trey

    white men view dating black women as being disgraceful. And as for black women having to work harder than whites, what a joke, affirmative action took care of the need to be qualified. The only people more entitled than blacks are American Indians. In both instances we are paying for things that happened to ancestors that no one met.

  • Andrew

    These types of articles make me sick. Race is a social construct and an outdated one at that. Making blanket statements that “White people do/think this” and “black people do/think that” is the very reason we still have racial problems in our world today. By perpetuating the idea that skin pigment plays a role in how we think and who we are, you are preventing the human race from coming together and treating people as individuals. As a white man who has dated mostly black women, I cannot begin to tell you how much pain I have dealt with because of this outdated idea that just because someone’s skin looks a certain way, they must think and act a certain way. I fear for this world, and our entire future generations. We must wake up and recognize Mr Luther King wanted us all to be colorblind. To treat each other as individuals. Articles that include blanket statements regarding one “race” or another, and then making statements and assumptions about that “Race” are inherently and inarguably racist. Please everyone, follow MLK’s dream. Drop the race talk, completely and altogether and love each other as human beings and for the soul and character and individuality we each possess. I don’t want my children and grandchildren to grow up in a society where articles like this still exist.

  • jamss

    hey im a white female and i’ve NEVER been approached by a white guy either!

  • Justin

    To all the black women out there, please don’t be ashamed of yourselves, you are undoubtedly the most beautiful creatures to grace this planet. I’m a white guy, and I love each and every aspect of your body–from your bodacious curves to your curly hair–and your very warm and colorful personalities!

    Black women for the win!

  • railbaron62

    I am a white man and have been attracted to black women since jr high. At that time there was still the stigma not to date outside one’s race. I am still running into brick walls though with some black women hesitant to date a white man. I would like to find a black lady in Oklahoma to fall in love with.

  • Shadowkiss

    Im a italian american white guy. I can tell you three facts that are extremely sad. 1- i have never known a white male friend that was not attracted to black women…ever. All of my white friends think they are attractive. 2- i have never had a white male friend that has ever dated/hooked up or even talked to a black woman…ever. Not one of them has ever even approached a black woman, including myself. 3- i have never had a white male friend that was ever, once, approached by a black woman. These three facts are true to my word, and are actually pathetic.
    Now what i am about to say may sound kind of harsh. It is so common for black men to be with white women. Now if it is to be just as common the other way around, black women and white men both have to stop thinking what other people will say and do, and just go for it. My message to black women: start to open up a bit. We are truly interested and want you, but you also have to help break the ice. Black women have always had to be strong throughout history to survive slavery, prejudice, poverty and abuse. Also historically, white men have also had to be strong through global wars, dictatorships, pandemics and hard work. Both have always taken protection to raise children as well. Black women and White men have more in common than society thinks. Lets get rid of this taboo bull$h!t, and show society we can be just as good as lovers as our counterparts…if not BETTER 😉

  • Sinclaire Caviness

    I don’t think black women dating white men is about looks. Venus
    and Serena Williams, Michelle Obama, Queen Latifah, Alek Wek and others have
    redefined black beauty worldwide. Most women of all races have their
    insecurities, even supermodels and actresses. Yes, some black women are not
    attracted to white men. That’s a personal preference. Yes, white men are
    hesitant to approach black women and vice versa. It’s true from my experience
    that white men do like an equal partner, but it’s also true these days that
    black women are getting college degrees and becoming business owners in record
    numbers. Many of us ARE most certainly equals and then some. I think the
    problem is fear of public scrutiny and criticism. It’s also about being “programmed”
    to avoid dating a white man. We are told, “Don’t bring home a white guy!” We’re
    constantly bombarded with past history and how wrong it is to desire a white man.
    Love is where you find it and love is colorblind. Life is short. Let love rule.
    Read “Black Woman White Man: A Black Woman’s Journey to Love And The Truth
    About Interracial Dating by Sinclaire Caviness. Find it on

  • michael145

    I’m a little late to this conversation but I just saw the article now. Truthfully I think it is on both sides. I think many times black women don’t notice white men and white men don’t notice black women. I’m a white man and I go out to clubs and from what I’ve seen its very rare that these two groups are attracted to each other. I don’t get a sense that there’s any animosity between black women and white men, I just think we don’t even notice each other. Its kind of like a woman in her 50s and a man in his thirties in a club. Despite what Hollywood would have you believe I rarely see that happen in real life. You don’t hate each other or have any bad will towards each other its just that neither party is interested in the other. I think its like that with black women and white men, no ill will, just not interested on both sides. Are there occassionally exceptions to this rule? Sure. There are occassionally exceptions to ever rule but I think in general that’s what’s going on in my opinion.

    • deb

      I think part of it is both groups have been programmed and are USED to just ignoring one another. It’s like a guy seeing his friend’s sister as just a little sister but then one day after spending more alone time with her, he starts to really notice her.

      There are just way too many attractive black women and white men for anyone to just sweep what we see with “oh they don’t notice one another”. I do think things are changing though with younger people. I came across a tumblr that featured everyday, normal black women/white men in relationships and there was an endless array of them, I was kind of surprised. Anyway most of them where pretty young…teenager and young adults (early-mid 20’s). I also hear BW/WM dating is the norm in areas like the NW and Philly. I love IR pairing of all sorts though because it shows people are widening the scope of who they can date and it’s better for their chances in finding relationships! I’m even noticing an increase in asian men and black women dating which I hardly even imagined (sadly enough).

  • Bianca

    I almost forgot. Women with curves, regardless of their skin color, will eventually be fat one day. Who wants that?

    • AZWhiteGuy

      Those of us who love BIG, BLACK women, that’s who.

  • Bianca

    Wow! This is a terrible article. I am a black woman with dreadlocks that is currently dating a white man. He loves my hair and doesn’t want me to get rid of it. I have no reason to be intimidated by him. As for the education thing, I have more education right now than he does. I’m trying to figure out who in the heck did you survey. It is not 1940, its 2012.

  • JC86

    I have a Baby with a Black woman and I’m a white Sicilian Man and we are Happy together I think this s**t is BULLS**T! This Race s**t Needs to stop its 2012

  • abeeb

    there pussys are to big and streached out

    • I think the words you are looking for ABEEB, are ‘their’ and ‘stretched’. TRY USING PROPER ENGLISH WHEN GOING OUT YOUR WAY TO BE INSULTING!! It will keep you from looking like a COMPLETE DUMBASS! Thank you.

    • AND PU**IES IS THE PLURAL FOR P***Y!! Didyou by any chance mean pu**y’s??!! PROBABLY! Try understanding the language ABEEB before saying stupid off the wall s**t.

  • sneeker

    man talk about stereotyping, nothing like rehashing old ideas

  • FBI_crime_stats

    “but the majority of black men now and days” LOL LOL HA HA –So much for speaking English. So according to ignorant writer, the majority of black men marry anything BUT blacks? Huh? First, few black men marry at all, so whatever planet this woman is on is FAR from Earth. Secondly, I guess all these black married couples I see are just in my imagination.

    The generalizations in this article are idiotic and wildly inaccurate. This whole article is idiotic and not founded in reality because the writer speaks as if all people in a group are the same. So much writing FAIL going on in this article.

    The writer of this article needs to drop her persecution complex, her victimhood complex, and then maybe someone will ask her out.

    “we are beautiful creatures who deserve the very best. We should also be able to get exactly what we want…The sky should be the limit for us.”

    1. YOU “DESERVE” NOTHING. Things are EARNED in this life.
    2. You won’t always get “exactly what you want.” Join reality some time.
    3. The “sky” is the limit huh. Come down to earth for once. Experience reality for a change. Try putting your expectations in the same zip code as reality.

  • Who did the research for this silly article? “Most black men marry outside of their race” show me the data that supports that, besides your girlfriends complaining about their being no good black men. From my experience (not a fact): Black women are taught that the only way they can be happy is with a black man, so many are closed to the opportunity that they never make the effort to break the racial wall. Un/Fortunately, black men have never really had to deal with that due in large part to male privilege, IMO.

  • John Sturm

    Oh, would you look at that…..Sample size of 6. Where did the author go, Martin Luther King Blvd? My wife is 100% Filipino, born in HI by 2 parents who immigrated from PI. She always states how I, as a white man, have to work much harder than her to succeed. This, “I have to work harder because I am black,” BS is a cop out. How many special programs, clubs, scholarships are there for white men? Where is the government mandated program that forces businesses to hire me because I am white? Yea, it’s sooooo rough being black in 21st century America. The lifestyle is idolized by many (including whites), supported by the gov (and many whites like myself), and financially entitled. If I were black, I would be paying less than half the tuition I am now ( and would have far more opportunities to be hired and promoted. Google the Dayton, OH Police Dept where they were forced to hire men and women who scored below 50% (an F) on their entrance tests….I’ll let you guess why. The purpose of this post is because I am fed up with hearing the, “I have to work so much harder because I am black” mentality. I have never met a member of any other minority group that spouts such falsehoods. Gain some accountability.
    Oh, and IN before, “You’re racist” for speaking the truth. Especially since “racist” is used in place of “prefudice” about 99% of the time, in mainstream America.

  • charight

    this is a racist article! if i wrote an article about white men not wanting to date black women because they’re curvy, etc., i’d get blasted (or, i would if i were a journalist; as an anonymous online idiot, no one cares what i say). strong double standards.

  • LOL

    Curvaceous = FAT

  • Wow

    Sample size of SIX? Wow, real scientific. Also, love the racial stereotyping. I wonder how you’d like it if a white woman painted black men with such a broad brush.

  • Trayvon

    Das raycis

  • Dr Figgler

    Hey!! Can’t we all ju, ju, just ge, ge, get along? I like dark women. Both black and hispanic. I also work on my own tan 9 months of the year.

  • GDP

    Curvy=awesome =), I think where the misconception is curvy vs. overweight. Some women define themselves as “curvy” when they are actually not taking care of themselves, and then tell everybody that men don’t like “curves”.

    So I would say #1 is untrue. Just try to find a guy of ANY race that doesn’t like boobs and a nice behind, it will be a long search….

  • Man of Sin

    lol this article. Black women in college these days prefer white men.

  • wheater

    Black women are just naturally bigger, that’s a fact…they also tend to go towards obesity more easily than white women, possibly due to diet, possibly due to upbringing doesn’t change the fact that it’s true.

    You go to a gym and see a few black women who aren’t thick, so you think that the stereotype isn’t true. Obesity and diabetes rates are higher in the black community for a reason. FYI.


    • deb

      hahahah keep typing! maybe you’ll eventually realize how ridiculous you sound. You’re probably too far gone anyway.


  • why would a white man want to date a black woman? the black men don’t even want them! Oprah can’t even get married and she is a billionaire!!

  • Melissa

    off the subject of white men and black women: despite what many may believe from the media black men are still are more likely to marry black women than white women. US statistics show that only 10% of black men marry non black women (8% of the married black men are with white women), does 8% really suggest most black men end up with white women, if so someone needs to learn basic maths.Most black men still prefer black women and a study on internet dating has also shown white women tend to prefer white men to black men, so do asian and latino women which is contrary to the belief of many black men that all women are enamored by black men. So basically white men are the ‘ideal’ for many women.

    Whilst many white women prefer white men, most are sill open to dating black men and many black men are open to dating them which is why they often end up together. black men are also more confident in approaching women than white men. If a white man is good looking and successful he has the pick of many white and asian women and they will not necessarily think to approach a black women and probably wouldn’t even meet as many black women as white/asian women.

  • Indifferentlyindependent

    What the hell is Regina King saying. From everyday people-to adult actresses–to every famed black female sex symbol in hollywood: BLACK WOMEN whether past and presently date with whites and/or marry exclusively NON BLACK. BW have forsaken black men long before a couple black guys began to date white (and sometimes latin). Truth is, this with black women living to service white men sexual and supportive needs, goes back past “old” hollywood (Dorothy Dandridge…Lena, Billie, D. Ross…Tina who was also beaten by various white men) all the way back into slavery. Whites have their way with black women…almost all women for that matter. And they’re the last group of men to deserve such status. BLACK WOMEN NEVER GIVE WHITE MEN ATTITUDES. THEN WM GOT THE NERVE TO BOAST THAT BLACK MEN CANT TREAT HIS OWN WOMAN RIGHT. IBFD at where we’ve destined.

    • AZWhiteGuy

      You clearly have issues that need resolution. For your own sake, as well as whoever you might be in a relationship with, I hope you find that resolution soon.

  • Tyga

    im a white man and i only date black women, this crap about white men not liking black women is not at all true in fact i think most white males are more attracted to them then women in their own race.

    • Biff

      I don’t know where you get your information from, but you’re wrong.

      • How can he be WRONG when the opinions and information he provides is based on his life??!!!

        • Oh stfu because no white man is gonna be named Tyga. This is nothing but a black woman under a disguise

          • CarlaKah

            And this is why the BELIEF in reason one is unfortunately very true. But I agree with Tyga. There are enough white men attracted to us. ESPECIALLY if you’re highly educated and well-paid.

            • So what you’re saying is white men are only attracted to highly paid black women?

              • CarlaKah

                @yahoo-TUEXVVHBFHYJ5T36VNTAD3PYTQ:disqus please read well. I write “especially” in captions. Imagine this, men often like to date women that fit their standards and desires right? A successful black woman is one that is financially and educationally at a level where there are more white available men, than black available men. This is not a racial statement but a unfortunately a fact. Independence, stability and maturity is attractive to a man who seeks these attributes in a woman. Men who are attracted to this will approach a woman like that. I know from experience that my complexion doesn’t matter that much to enough white men, when we already have our education, work and goals in common. That being said, I think a working black woman can attract any type of man if she carries herself in an accessible, charming, classy and open way.

    • anonymous

      “in fact i think most white males are more attracted to them then women in their own race”

    • lilian

      hi tyga, you are the only person here who gave a correct answer to this question. most white men i no said they love black women and they are not attracted to white women. i ask them why, they didn’t give me any answer for that. all my life as a black woman, men of every race has approached me and now i prefer to date white men more. i don’t even date black men any more. even when a black man approached me i tell him am not interested because i only prefer white men. white men in a whole love and add-or black women reasons because, white men see black women as, strong, intelligent, beautiful etc.
      most white men i no say that black women has the beauty that no other race of women come close to.

  • AnnaLovesALot7

    I personally think more white men and black women don’t date because they don’t know whether or not the other likes them..

    the reason I think this is because the one white guy i did approach DID date me but said he’s shy. then, i’ve dated other white men but they only approached me after hearing ‘through the grape vine’ that i liked them.

    soooo, i think there’s a lot of that. i know that honestly i didn’t used to like white men but as i grew, i now do. and i think that sometimes, yes, it’s the case that they just aren’t attracted and vise versa but really, MORE THEN THAT, the issue is feeling comfortable with something ‘new’ (like dating outside your own race).

    just my opinion…

    • tonymost

      It may be just your opinion, but you’re very accurate. I think this is a big part of the reason why I don’t approach black women more often… you actually described my “initiating” with black women to a T as well. Funny.

      • Biff

        You’re probably too much of a loser for a white woman to bother.

        • CarlaKah

          You seem to carry a load of self-hatred to assume () that a white man that likes black women must be “probably too much of a loser for a white woman to bother”. Very sad. Hope you don’t have any sisters or daughters for that matter.

          • kleptocracy

            He reads like the next step for him is shopping for fertilizer and a van. Probably moved to rural Idaho, where he lives in a camper top, craps in a 5-gal bucket, and keeps up his marksmanship while he awaits the “coming race war”.

            • CarlaKah

              Crazy indeed

        • CarlaKah

          You seem to carry a load of self-hatred to assume () that a white man that likes black women must be “probably too much of a loser for a white woman to bother”. Very sad. Hope you don’t have any sisters or daughters for that matter.

        • tonymost

          I feel sorry for you if you can’t see women that aren’t white as attractive. You’re missing out. Wait, was I supposed to be insulted by your ignorance? lol

        • guest

          You’re so sad. To think a man must be a loser to date a black woman. I’m sorry your mother was awful. Get some counseling, my brother, and free yourself.

          • ruff

            Aren’t white men more freakier in bed ,than black men? Whips,dress-up swingers etc?

    • Herman

      DO BLACK WOMEN DATE ASIAN MEN? IF no, than why not???I know BLACK-MEN love Asian women !

  • Pingback: Interracial Relationships: Why Black Women Don't Date White Men | EURweb()

  • This article is really ignorant. This article did not shed light on why black women do not date white men. It simply discussed why we believe white men would not want us. The only reason that closely touched that was the not being attracted to white men part. The rest of the article portrayed black women using their insecurities or deep seeded issues as a reason why white men will not date them. Who uses their hair, educational level, and body stop them from pursuing someone. That just those not make sense.

  • Anonymous

    You have to be kidding with these 5 reasons. The last one “We just don’t want them”…are you kidding? Can you imagine if a white woman said “We just don’t think black men are attractive”? She would be condemned nationally as a major racist. You are the typical close-minded black woman. You only want thugs. “Swag” comes in different forms…not just air jordans, walking like you just crapped your pants, etc. “Swag” for white men is our education, raising our kids, and getting good jobs. That’s our “swag”. If you want a ghetto drug dealer then stay within your race. You imply that white men are weak, submissive, and ugly. That is racist in every way. Black women are just brainwashed into thinking they should want angry, uneducated thugs who will gladly bang them, get them pregnant 5x, then leave them. You don’t deserve a white man the way you talk. You are destined to be single your entire life or you will eventually settle for a black thug. Enjoy.

  • whois

    Racist, Black hating terrible article. Who is the writer????

  • MikeF

    To the black girls that don’t like white guys: Your black ‘brothers’ don’t want you, they prefer white girls. Time to accept it and find a different race to date.

  • TheReasonIs

    This article is such bs. The reason I don’t date white men has nothing to do with the way I see myself at all! I’m a VERY confident black woman. I love the way I look and I went to top universities for both undergrad and graduate school! (both times on scholarships)

    The reason I don’t date white men is because I am tired of the constant cycle of my white male friends being ‘entrigued’, by the black girl, only for them to date me for a little while, and then for whatever the reason that we break up or stop seeing each other, they always end up seriously dating and marrying a white woman for social, religious, and family reasons.

    A lot of times in big cities, conservative white kids come from other states and end up in liberal diverse cities like New York with many different ethnic backgrounds all together. While white guys my age might be cool dating black women (Im 26), a lot of times their families are not, and the guys know this. Ultimately, when they are looking for a woman to settle down with and have kids, it’s even not about economic status, it doesn’t matter how many f*****g degrees I have, they just cant even think about having a mixed/ black baby.

    I’m tired of this psychological abuse that I endure anytime I get into a situation like this and so this is why I’m not dating white men.

  • KevKev

    Experience affects people’s perceptions immensely. Consider this example: I am an educated (med school grad) black male who grew up in the inner city (about 5 miles west of NYC).As a teenager and throughout my early college years it appeared as if black women always let me down in a very vitriolic manner when I approached them (nervously and very shyly, but never disrespectfully). Over time I just realized that it was part of the “game”. But still it never made any sense to me why, for the most part, women of other races were generally more kind in their rebukes, whereas SOME black women felt the need to be nasty. I never gave up faith on black women, and now (at age 26) I feel like I understand them a lot more, and have realized that they are women, just like any other woman on earth, however some have not learned how to speak to men in a cordial manner when they are not sexually interested. I would also say that some of them have “unreal” expectations for Mr. Right (which is okay), and find themselves not trying to “go out of the box”, if you will, to date a man (whether he is black or white) that does not fit their “prototype”. As a result, many of them complain of not finding professional black men to date, but dozens of my black friends and I (all professionals: doctors, lawyers, engineers,Ivy league grads…you name it- from various socioeconomic backgrounds) would attest to the “fact” that sometimes approaching these women is like playing Russian Roulette, because you never know whether or not you are going to be greeted with a nasty attitude. This is why it pains me to see several scholarly articles over the past few years (including a notorious NY Times editorial) claiming that there are not enough “good” (educated/professional) black men. They are out there! We ALL have to realize that it takes two to tango, so black women and black men both need to reevaluate our respect for ourselves and the way that we approach and speak to each other. I do not see any feasible reason why a woman should be upset when a man approaches in an amenable, gentleman-like manner. I mean, we are men, right. The last time I checked our urges for sex and companionship are natural and normal, so it only makes sense that we would be attracted to you. Yes, some black men (namely the uneducated ones from the bad/inner city neighborhoods) are very disrespectful in their approach. Heck, some even go as far as to touch a woman they do not even know in an attempt to court her. But that is not all. And another shocking trend that I have noticed is that a lot of educated black women appear to go for the uneducated black man. Many of my female black cohorts have explained that most of these men have more charisma, confidence, and “swag” than the educated black man. Most of these same women complain that they cannot find marriageable black men, and tend to judge the educated black men based on their observations of the non-educated black men. If you date trash, you will end up getting trash results. You also have to understand that the attraction to the uneducated black man may be connected to the lust for the “bad boy”. These same women fail to consider that we (educated black men) have seen the negative effects of the “bad boy”/”hood” black culture. Heck, some of us even grew up in those same neighborhoods, and are just as “tough”. We just made wiser decisions. In closing I’d say this: society is more and more accepting of interracial couples. Although, I have continued to court black women and seek out those opportunities, there are many other professional black men (some of whom I know and have had extensive convos with) who are no longer willing to try to court black women, and instead choose to date outside of their race. Their usual motivation is that they “cannot deal with the bitch-like attitude”. I usually try to tell them that it is not “ALL” black women who act this way, but apparently ENOUGH do, so it imposes a negative coloring on all black women, and most important of all, it destroys many excellent possibilities for black love. So if you are a black man, and you are reading this, think about the pick-up lines that you use, and the way you approach black women (and all women period). And if you are a black woman who is interested in dating black men, think about the energy that you put out there, and what you can do to assuage the situation. It shouldn’t be this hard folks!
    P.S.Sorry for the long post. I just wanted to be very thorough. And I apologize if I offended anyone, in any way, shape, or form. These comments reflect my views, opinions, and experiences, and are not necessarily representative of the opinions of black men throughout the world.
    Peace & Love,Kev

  • Nick Diaz’s Dad

    The main reason that black women don’t date white guys is that they don’t know how to spend his cash. They are so used to food stamps and EBT cards it’s just too much work to figure out how to spend real money.

    • The MOST IGNORANT POST I have ever seen on any article I have ever read or commented to. But like @$$Holes, everyone has their on opinions. As a whole, BW &WM that ARE ATTRACTED to one another don’t know how and when to approach one another! Class is not really a factor.

  • AZWhiteGuy

     Oh, where to begin here…

    Part of the dilemma lies in women of color thinking that men outside of their race won’t be attracted to them.

    Do you do a lot of  this broad-brush painting?  “Women of color” is a term so broad as to be meaningless (I’ll play nice here and not be a cynical smartass who asks “women of what color?”).  “Woman of color” describes women who are rich, poor, or middle class; have post-graduate degrees or are high school dropouts, are well-traveled or provincial, are open to exploration and experimentation or are traditionalists with narrow worldviews.  In other words, they are as varied as women of any other race or ethnic background.  To ascribe one viewpoint to all of them is, to put it charitably, unfair and, from a journalistic standpoint, not only inaccurate but irresponsible.

    Finally, the idea that all “women of color” believe that men of other races won’t be attracted to them, which the sentence I quote above strongly implies through its wording, would explain, if true, why men of other races aren’t attracted to them.  What man with any self-respect wants to be bothered with women who have none themselves?  Fortunately for African-American womanhood, I can safely say that enough of my fellow white guys know enough black women to know that the statement quoted above is pure, unadulterated, and obvious BS.

    In the white community … the bigger the butt, the less attractive. If your hips are too wide you’re considered fat. Thinner is usually all around better within the white community. This is naturally engrained in both African American and Caucasian people’s subconscious.

    Again the broad brush.  This is the point at which I begin to wonder how many white men any of these “women of color” sampled have known beyond superficial acquaintance.  While certainly a large percentage of white men prefer the anorexic (and usually incurably neurotic) Barbie Doll type, there are many, MANY more of us who prefer that “baby got back!” – lots of it.  We might not be a majority, be we ARE a significant percentage of the whole.  What might be a factor that misleads so many women is the sentiment best expressed by the old crude joke “big girls are like mopeds – they’re fun to ride, but you wouldn’t want your friends to see you on one.”  The good news is that this is attitude is much less prevalent now than in recent past, and why shouldn’t it be?  If there is any truth to the statistic that one out of every three Americans is “overweight” (a statistic that I take issue with, but that’s neither here nor there), then it stands to reason that there is less antipathy toward “big” people of the opposite sex than is commonly assumed, and that cuts across racial lines. 

    A white man on the other hand is used to naturally unenhanced straight hair that he gets to run his fingers through. The women I surveyed said they were naturally intimidated when it came to dating a white man because of their hair.

    Once again, how many white men do the “women of color” surveyed here really know?  As I pointed out in another article on this site concerning things guys don’t really care about, hair was one of those things not mentioned that should have been.  When considering the whole woman (yes, a few of us Neanderthals still do that), it doesn’t usually register as a major deal breaker.  Simply stated, ladies, it just ain’t all that important to us.  What’s growing out of your scalp just isn’t a factor in your relationship problems.  My wife changes her hair styles as frequently as the U.S. government invents new justifications for our occupation of Afghanistan.  One month she’ll wear a weave, the next a perm, the month after that, she’ll crop her hair close.  Heck, for all I know she might even shave it all off at some point in the future.  So sometimes I can run my fingers through her hair, other times I can’t.  I just enjoy it whenever I can.  Does it mean that I love her any less because her hairstyle of the month won’t let me caress it?  I certainly hope not, and I certainly hope that something this trivial and shallow isn’t a major relationship determinant.  If it is, then we need to be very worried.

    White men that are very successful will usually date a woman who is as successful or at least in the same class as himself. At least then he feels as if he has something in common with her. Because the black community doesn’t have as many advantages this leaves desirable black women to a minimum.

    This one is probably generally correct, although my own story might be anomalous.  While I have a college degree, my wife does not (she has some college under her belt and I’ve encouraged her to finish her degree if she wants to, but she says she’s not interested).  She is, however, beyond question one of the smartest and most talented black women I have ever known.  In particular, her knack for business administration and financial management has landed her some good jobs, although, to her credit, she became sick and tired of the corporate world’s nonsense a few years back and now freelances from home at odd jobs (only one of us needs to do hard time, as I tell her).   In terms of background, she grew up in a working class urban environment, while I came from a middle class suburban environment.  Statistically and logically, we shouldn’t have anything in common at all, much less be married to each other, even tossing the race factor aside.  But we do, we are, and have been married for nearly twenty years.  “Success” comes in many forms and “class” is at best an artificial and transient construct.  Don’t let it rule your life as if it’s a straitjacket. 

    We as black women are constantly criticized for being the ones not open to dating outside of our race but what happens if white men just do not approach us? When I surveyed these women, 4 out of the 6 said they were never even approached by a white guy … Statistics show that white men usually date within their race and if they don’t, they are more likely to date a Hispanic, Asian or pacific islander. The percentage of white men and black women that date is a very low one.

    Well, if a large percentage (dare I suggest a majority?) of black women truly are not open to dating outside of their race and if this is generally well known among white men, then why, pray tell, should it come as any surprise that they are reluctant to approach black women?  Simple logic and the laws of probability dictate that investing effort in something that is unlikely to bear fruit  is a waste of one’s time and emotional energy and probably not worth pursuing. 

    Aside from that, and at the risk of starting a flame war (not that I’m averse to that), there is also the “attitude factor.”  This is not a trait perceptible in all, or even a majority of black women and is probably more a factor of socioeconomic background than race. To be perfectly fair, it is not unique to black women (it really is an “American woman” thing).  However, many white men perceive (key word here) a particularly virulent strain of attitude in black women, one borne of anger, hatred, frustration, envy, boredom, lack of self-esteem, or some combination thereof and it serves as a particularly effective form of  man repellent – probably to any self-respecting man of any race or ethnic background who seeks a meaningful relationship.  If repelling the opposite sex is the intent, fine.  It works.  Otherwise, it might be grounds for some introspection.  White men can get all the attitude they could ever want in multiple lifetimes from white women, so why cross the color line to get more of the same?  “Cyanide or arsenic?” isn’t something many of us are willing to choose between.

    We are also guilty of just not feeling it. 4 out of 6 women also said they were simply not attracted to white men. They felt as if they lacked good looks that they were used to, as well as confidence (swag) and sex appeal. Because of this it was hard for most of them to really become serious about potentially being able to have a serious relationship with a white man.

    “Guilty” is hardly an appropriate word here, even as a rhetorical tool.  You like what you like, you don’t like what you don’t like.  It’s that simple and there’s nothing at all wrong with it.  As for “swag,” well, once again I have to question the depth and breadth of the sampling pool, but that aside, I also must wonder why that would be considered a major factor in any serious relationship.  “Swag” can easily be equated with empty bravado, posturing, and other signs of obvious insecurity and shallowness.  I’ve known far too many women –and not just black women— drawn to “swag” who wind up finding out, too late, that the guy (black, white, or otherwise) was not only “not about s**t,” but abusive as well.  In other words, the more brightly colored the package, the less substance to the contents.  Certainly not a hard and fast rule, but a reasonable generalization supported by lots of anecdotal evidence.  As for “sex appeal,” that’s one of those terms like “insider trading,” “obstruction of justice,” and “economic recovery”: people throw it around all the time, but damned if they can define it consistently.  ‘Nuff said. 

    So what is my overarching point?  This: the collectivist attitude -that is, viewing others solely in terms of their place in a group- is DANGEROUS AND DEHUMANIZING.  It robs the individual, the only thing of value, of being all they can be and also denies others the ability to appreciate each individual for who they really are.  Each of you is your own person.  Do what works for YOU, love who YOU LOVE, regardless of what the rest of the herd thinks or does.  Otherwise, happiness is something you’ll only watch others enjoy, from the outside looking in.  Not easy to do, believe me, but once you adopt that philosophy and be your own person, there is no greater freedom!

    [Getting down off of soapbox and chopping it up for firewood]

    • FemaleandblackUK

      @AZWhiteGuy….What a well structured argument and well written piece…I couldn’t have done it better.
      Madamenoire, please stop portraying black women as a desperate, monolithic group of people, lacking self confidence and looking for validation from other races. That is simply not the case for myself or the majority of black females I know and associate with.

      • jack sprat

        If your target demographic is moved by what you are you doing to behave in ways which bring you coin, then you would be well advised to continue so moving them. Love you, hate you…as long as they’re not indifferent.

    • LoveEachotherForemost

      Dude you sound damn desperate writing all of that bs. The world does not revolve around you and other white men taste for black women who don’t belong to your greedy funky *ss. Go preach all this elephant sh*t at stormfront or any one of many THOUSANDS of sites which promote hatred and physical violence against black people. get off of p*ssy patrol. You don’t deserve black women. Hypocrite, you’re no friend of mine or black women.

      • brock landers

        Hey sweetie, this isnt the 70s, the black panthers are no longer relevant. There is no need for your militaristic, racist point of view. So black men are allowed to get with women of all other racists, but white men are not allowed to be attracted to and want to date black women? You are ridiculous, get out of here with your bullshit.

        • brock landers

          all other races**

      • paul

        typical racist yank jog on the world has no place for you

  • justme

    I have to say one reason why some black women have not been approached by white men could be ther fact of their environment. (and yes I am black)… if some of these women would broaden their environment such as getting out of a certain area that tends to be typically urban and trying other places they might be surprised by what they find.

  • Msmykimoto2u

    How about them not being able to relate to you being black and understanding what its like to be a person of color in todays society?

  • To any insecure black woman (doesn’t apply if you are not INSECURE): I have come to the conclusion, men like women who are attractive. Attractive women come in all colors. If you are a a black woman, remember that. I use to be shocked when any man other than a black man, approached me. I looked around like, “Are you talking to me”, but why shouldn’t they be talking to me. If a black man finds me attractive, why couldn’t any other man? I have walked down the street in jeans, a t-shirt, flats on my feet, and my hair in a scarf, and had a white man call out, “Hey pretty girl”. A few minutes later, a similar treatment by a black man in the grocery store. They saw the same thing. I don’t look different just because a man is white. I’m just saying, black women need to stop thinking we have to look a certain way to be attractive to ANYBODY. Do you think Hispanic or Asian women are shocked when white men take notice of them? Please stop thinking we come last on the totem pole.


    I do have preferences. I like men who sport goatees, I like men whose hair (all over) is darker than their skin (ie Eric Balfour), I like men with pretty white teeth, I like men who are 6 ft tall or at least close, I like men who have nice bodies, I like a man with a deep voice, I like men who keep themselves clean, & tidy….I could go on, but my point is, these men come in all colors. Why deny yourself a man with these features because they are not black?

  • Phillyswp215

    Im a whitebul, and i love black women. I wish i could find a black girl to hook up wit, but i just feel black girls dont like white dudes…iunno i guess i cant give up and keep tryn!!

  • “It has been known that the bigger the backside the better”…. lol I love how black women attempt to justify gorging themselves w grease and fat and never going within a mile of a gym, by playing the Girl You Big And Beautiful card.  It’s nothing more than a way to rationalize obesity.

  • Jjcool284

    I’m a white guy, I go to a predominately black church and I’m really attracted to black women. Not sure why but i’ve never been attracted to women of my race and I think black women are incredible beautiful women with strong personalities. 

  • Lietwome

    ONE more media effort to stereotype black women in a negative light.  YOU too are brain washed into believing we all the same person in different bodies. WE black women all like some big black man who will do nothing but leave babies at our door and broken hearts. PLEASE from a sister who dates and married a white man they are different and YES in a good way.  Black women need to wake up YOU can do better.  There more than a few men of all races who can see our beauty, inside and out. 

  • Lietwome

    ONE more media effort to stereotype black women in a negative light.  YOU too are brain washed into believing we all the same person in different bodies. WE black women all like some big black man who will do nothing but leave babies at our door and broken hearts. PLEASE from a sister who dates and married a white man they are different and YES in a good way.  Black women need to wake up YOU can do better.  There more than a few men of all races who can see our beauty, inside and out. 

  • Lietwome

    ONE more media effort to stereotype black women in a negative light.  YOU too are brain washed into believing we all the same person in different bodies. WE black women all like some big black man who will do nothing but leave babies at our door and broken hearts. PLEASE from a sister who dates and married a white man they are different and YES in a good way.  Black women need to wake up YOU can do better.  There more than a few men of all races who can see our beauty, inside and out. 

  • Guest

    I’m not going to lie I’ve always been a bit apprehensive when white men approach me b/c I guess in the back of my mind I’m thinking how can a white dude appreciate my features?? I’ve been single for a while and I’ve decided the next time I date I will expand my dating pool.

    I’ve always found all races attractive, so why limit myself?t must have been nerve wracking for the white dudes that did approach me, but I’e realized more white dudes approach me than black! Crazy right! So I going to take a chance, you only live once! Lol

    • deb

      I guess in the back of my mind I’m thinking how can a white dude appreciate my features??”

      yeah if you come off as approachable, friendly and are just chill and yourself, guys (ok MEN) will be interested and approach or you’ll just find yourself in conversation with cool people of different races. Just take care of yourself, take pride in your uniqueness and live your life! You want to be around someone like that and it’s the same for others. I’m a person that has dealt with low self esteem and I am really shy and I’m finding out that this is really true! Anyway good luck finding good guys. Remember to vet vet vet guys of any race…there are jerks in every color, class, creed…etc..

  • Interesting article. I am W24, grad student, lives near Chicago. I am attracted to black women. I found this article through searching, “how to date a black women”. I don’t really know how to approach black women, or most women in general. I have this complex about being short (5- 6′) and this fear of whatever I say would be offensive. I never thought of the hair thing being an issue, doesn’t bother me but I would see how it would bother women.  

  • Holla

    white men dont date sisters because they is afraid that the black man gave them herpes!

    • WOW!! Can you say, IGNORANCE IS BLISS!!

  • “After speaking to 6 black women between the ages of 25-40 most state that they believe a white man would not be attracted to them because of their voluptuous bodies.” Incorrect. Rather, quite incorrect.

  • Foranythingun12

    The article is about why black women don’t date white men. For the most part, black women ARE NOT attracted to white men. Yes, there are few but statistics prove that black women desire black men.

  • Antonio_kinney87

    A lot of u guys make it seem as if black men are just downright trash put it this was black white don’t matter all men do it women too. Black american women that think that the grass is greener on the other side just because they get them a caucasian man have another thing comming they will do you just like the next man would if not worse I say dat to say this quit using color to justify someones character when u don’t even know that individual look at yourself and ask this question am I happy and comfortable in my own skin thank you

    • Mike G

      Hey all, straight up, I’m a white guy, I’m an Italian NewYorker(parents are from southern Italy), I’m young, very successful, independently wealthy, educated, a war vet…yada-yada… I’ve dated many women all across the board, except asian, I just don’ t find them attractive, but I’m going to honestly say that my most successful relationships have been with black women. I don’t know what it is, but we seem to click better. Unfortunately, I’m always the one to break things off all-of-a-sudden. And I have to say, if you’re a white man that dates black women, there is a stigma attached to you…. and it’s not good….it can be uncomfortable, from your family, from ‘friends’, business associates, some people are stupid. When you walk away from love because others are making things difficult, you feel stupid and selfish….and guilty, living and learning…

  • Kalbertini

    I am a white man & I didn^t like the statement most white men prefer thin white women. Black women especially those that have meat & potatoes(just a expression describing all women who are curvaceous & have a bit of xtra weight wise) can be stunningly gorgeous.There is one at work who is not married & certainly not thin(& does not have to be) but her smile,beautiful face,curves etc have me swooning.Many white men I know like women of colour & women in general who are not too thin.Some weight in the buttocks,bottom & even waist depict a healthy woman.Just like the painters in the renaissance.I goota find a way to talk/communicate with this lovell black lady at work,but its difficult

    • Kalbertini

      Sorry for a bit of bad grammer in last sentence. I gotta find a way to talk/communicate with this lovely black lady at work,but its difficult

    • Angieb71

      YOU SHOULD GO  AFTER WHO YOU WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Unpaintedhuffheins

    4 of the 5 reasons – the top four at that – are in essence “why white men don’t date black women,” just lazily turned around as reasons black women therefore feel uncomfortable about the idea. 

    Anyway, I’m white and I love black women.  Yeah, the hair is goofy, but the lips and skin are wonderful.  Also, a good woman of any color is hard to find, but it seems like when you do find a good black woman, she’s the absolute cream of the crop. 

    •  Dude…I don’t see anything beautiful about your hair.  God gave is only son our hair, that’s how special it was to him.

  • Pingback: What Men Want Study | What Men Want From A Woman()

  • TOLD YOU CRAZZEE CLAWZZ was gonna start back up!! Here we go people! CARRIBEAN IN THE HOUSE, is back in the HOUSE!! YAAAAYYYY!! LMFAO at his/her latest comments.

  • Latessa124

    I read with amusement your article on why black women don’t date white men. I’ve been married to one and now date one for the last four years. I’ve been with intelligent black men too. The white man I’m with loves my locks (natural hair, loves my large round bottom, and breasts….and most of all loves my mind.) And he not just says it shows it. Many white men approach me.  I guess I just don’t limit myself and that seems to work.

    Had to share…love the article and conversation!


  • John

    I believe love should happen. I am a white man. Never had a racial preference or desire based on my family experience. Find a person you love balck or white.

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  • Ra

    Not attracted to white men should be #1. Just because we don’t date white men does not mean that this necessarily stems from an insecurity. Black women are just fine and don’t need a white man on their arm to establish that we are secure.

    • Napper Trey

      afro-american man love there woman steel, just respact,love your black kings in everthing will go good!

      • UHHH, What??!!! TRY IT LIKE THIS, Afro- American men love their black women still. Just respect, love your black kings and everything will be good! I didn’t mean to correct your entry, BUT WE DON’T NEED to give THAT CARIBBEAN IN THE HOUSE or ANONYMOUS( the one hating on BLACKS) more to work with. PLEASE BE CAREFUL WHEN YOU ENTER YOUR BLOGS!!! 

        • HAWK

          I agree. Those two pestilence are the scum of the earth, most especially ‘Caribbean In The House’!.

        • Lol. Sorry byt this had me LOL in the library. I had to control. Ha.

        • Napper Trey

          ok baby!

  • Ace

    im not gonna lie, this is probably the stupidest article i have ever read.  there are soooo many things wrong with the first two sentences; they give the impression that the author is a generalist, bitter, misguided, uninformed, etc.

    “Interracial dating has been one of the biggest conversations within the
    black community.”
    Says who? As a black person I have rarely to if ever talked about interracial dating.

    “Black men have made it no secret their liking to white
    This statement screams of personal grievance and bitter past experience. How do you go from stating that interracial dating is the topic of subject, to black men stating their affection for white women??  You do realize there are other races out there, and if black men are dating white women why that means… let me get this right… then the white women they date, must… like them too??  So then, I suppose white women have also made it no secret their liking to black men?  Your framing of the sentence indicates your own personal subversion to the societal stereotypes of black men.

    ” I recently did a survey on a group of black women regarding their reasons for not dating men who are not of color.”
    Based on your first two sentences this probably means you sat around with your friends drinking and bashing black men for your dating grievances.  And confirmed by the author on the next page:

    “After speaking to 6 black women…”
    Seriously, you are now citing a sample size of 6 as a “survey”?!

  • Ace

    im not gonna lie, this is probably the stupidest article i have ever read.  there are soooo many things wrong with the first two sentences; they give the impression that the author is a generalist, bitter, misguided, uninformed, etc.

    “Interracial dating has been one of the biggest conversations within the
    black community.”

    Says who? As a black person I have rarely to if ever talked about interracial dating.

    “Black men have made it no secret their liking to white
    This statement screams of personal grievance and bitter past experience. How do you go from stating that interracial dating is the topic of subject, to black men stating their affection for white women??  You do realize there are other races out there, and if black men are dating white women why that means… let me get this right… then the white women they date, must… like them too??  So then, I suppose white women have also made it no secret their liking to black men?  Your framing of the sentence indicates your own personal subversion to the societal stereotypes of black men.

    ” I recently did a survey on a group of black women regarding their reasons for not dating men who are not of color.”

    Based on your first two sentences this probably means you sat around with your friends drinking and bashing black men for your dating grievances.

  • Miscmale

    I am a white man who met a black woman on Facebook and we are hitting it off just great race wise with the exceptions of other factors. She doesn’t want to spend an evening or weekend with me as well as not being sexual. I had asked if this is race related and she sys no. I love her dearly and hope that our relationship improves. If not, race had no bearing.

    •  It really depends on more factors than race. For example, How long have you two been dating? Most women do not want to jump in the sack so soon. I mean, I know about needs and wants. It’s okay to want sex, but at the same time, do you respect her? Have you guys gotten the chance to bond and get to know each other without sex? How about long talks and long walks? For a woman (and yes, I will say this, a lot of bw are raised to wait), giving herself up is something that is supposed to be a gift for someone she loves. She probably likes you but you can’t expect a woman to jump right in.

  • j.t mcgivering

    I am WM married to an impeccable,beautiful BW for 16 yrs (with3 tiresome kids lol)..The most important thing abt who you marry,in my view,is CLASS..Four of my ‘white’ friends/acquaintances have married bw just in the last year.They all have a lot in common due to education,tastes in art,high culture etc.BW are the most beautiful women on earth..Quit beating youself up. lol.

  • Njerimk89

    It’s also about location, and groups you hang out with. I dated a white guy in high school, and in college was constantly approached by white guys or got crushed on. I agree the ambw relationship is growing, in college I went to a couple of parties with a mixture of black and asian and was hit on by both. I also live in a city that was created for multi-racial families, so a lot of bmww, bwwm, etc., families here. I’ve never really had an issue of dating within or outside of my race, but I definitely agree with the list, when conversating with some other black women. The finger isn’t being thrown at black men, and I don’t think we’re complaining about black men dating outside of their race, many of my black guyfriends do and so do I and we support eachother and root for eachother, because it’s about the personality and their feelings not the color of their skin.

  • Njerimk89

    It’s also about location, and groups you hang out with. I dated a white guy in high school, and in college was constantly approached by white guys or got crushed on. I agree the ambw relationship is growing, in college I went to a couple of parties with a mixture of black and asian and was hit on by both. I also live in a city that was created for multi-racial families, so a lot of bmww, bwwm, etc., families here. I’ve never really had an issue of dating within or outside of my race, but I definitely agree with the list, when conversating with some other black women. The finger isn’t being thrown at black men, and I don’t think we’re complaining about black men dating outside of their race, many of my black guyfriends do and so do I and we support eachother and root for eachother, because it’s about the personality and their feelings not the color of their skin.


    This article was a big generalization. While I do commend you for writing this to spread a word some may not yet have known, I have to say, I could have single handedly guessed everything on the list, and I’m not even a decade old. Six people not does a survey make. Unless you were surveying 60 black women from different states, then your gatherings are kind of invalid.This sort of read as if their is a pot of gold attached to the white man’s p*nis. I don’t want to be Debbie-downer here but a lot of these comments do not make sense to me. I live in Florida which is one big melting pot. There are so many mixed couples here- black/white, asian/black, latin/irish, and the list goes on. I’m not saying that Florida is exempt from the “black woman’s woes” of not dating interracial, because there are a lot of same race couples, but come on. If you see a bag you like do you not check it out. I’m very much attracted to white men, I’ve had jungle fever since I was in middle school. If I see a white guy I think looks nice, I go up to him. The same goes for a black guy or a latin guy or which ever. If any indication of your survey is correct, we have forgiven the white man and everything he’s done to us but we have yet to forgive ourselves for being born black. 

    Besides, there is nothing wrong with sticking to what is familiar. If a black man is what you want, who says you should settle for anything less?


    This article was a big generalization. While I do commend you for writing this to spread a word some may not yet have known, I have to say, I could have single handedly guessed everything on the list, and I’m not even a decade old. Six people not does a survey make. Unless you were surveying 60 black women from different states, then your gatherings are kind of invalid.This sort of read as if their is a pot of gold attached to the white man’s p*nis. I don’t want to be Debbie-downer here but a lot of these comments do not make sense to me. I live in Florida which is one big melting pot. There are so many mixed couples here- black/white, asian/black, latin/irish, and the list goes on. I’m not saying that Florida is exempt from the “black woman’s woes” of not dating interracial, because there are a lot of same race couples, but come on. If you see a bag you like do you not check it out. I’m very much attracted to white men, I’ve had jungle fever since I was in middle school. If I see a white guy I think looks nice, I go up to him. The same goes for a black guy or a latin guy or which ever. If any indication of your survey is correct, we have forgiven the white man and everything he’s done to us but we have yet to forgive ourselves for being born black. 

    Besides, there is nothing wrong with sticking to what is familiar. If a black man is what you want, who says you should settle for anything less?

  • IShotCherylCole

    Who would be a Black woman?……we can love ourselves as much as we want but it seems as though men of all races have been brainwashed into not to liking us….I could be wrong but..

    All I can say is White Supremacy is a terrible thing and I hope theres a special place in heaven for black women…some place like a special black woman spa where we can get all the special attention we should have gotten on earth.

    Sexism and Racism are individually tricky at the best of times …combined they are an expletive@£@!$!

  • sakinamengle

    If Whoopi Goldberg can get a white guy?????  Whoopi Goldberg is an awesome, well educated, beautiful woman, and she can get any guy!!!  Getting a white guy is not some huge accomplishment!!  White men are happy that Whoopi Goldberg wants them!!  Some people here are obviously brainwashed about what beauty is.  I suggest you take a very close look at Whoopi Goldberg, and you can see she is far more beautiful inside and out than the made up, plastic surgeoned up, dumb, white, Kim Kardashians of the world that the “white establishment media”  is making you think is so beautiful!!

  • Cool1reese

    While all of these black women are saying this. Right now here in Santa Monica Ca. Their is a black woman sitting here right in front of me with a white man.  I live and work here in Santa Monica Ca.  I call out any black single or non single women to come here and hang out with me for my 8 hour work day.  I’m single and love my brown skin sisters.  We can all complain, but everything we are saying is a reflection of us.  We must change are negative attitude, be willing to let go of our past relationships and start fresh with a new you!  I have more white women speak to me, more than my own race, and that is just a good morning, good afternoon, and good evening.  The 1st. law of nation is self preservation, take care of you and the rest will follow, be happy with you, and how you’re able to love and receive love.  I work security here in Santa Monica and I see more sisters with white men here, but in LA, the Wood, and in Compton there are sisters with brothers who are struggling trying to make it, and I give phrase to those who stay true.  The sisters that work here and live here in Santa Monica Ca. date the $ not the man, so majority of the men with the $ are white, and can provide for the needed materials of a black woman.  If a sister can get a white guy who is willing to pay when they go out, why not!  It’s better than going out with a real true hard working brother who may ask if you can go dutch.  Every sister enters a new relationship carrying their old relationship with them.  It’s a black mans curse, for we may say something or do something that triggers that emotion of the past.  We always want something now instead of healing ourselves and being patience and learning ourselves and understand who we are before we move forward on a more positive note.  I love my sisters, I love my sisters, but if us black men are not the 1’s for you, then so be it.  $ is the root of all evil, we must allow our heart to love, be loved, and show love for 1 another, if we say we want to continue dating within our race, and pray for 1 another that we grow to love ourselves within our relationships, have and good/clear understanding using communication.  As I tell everyone I’ve met, I’m here!  Santa Monica Mall in Santa Monica Ca.    

  • ughh, reading some of the comments on this post has made my stomach churn, I gotta click away. taking a “survey of 6 women is hardly a sample, the article is stupid.

    I pray you all let go of your anger one day

  • Worldpeacecutie

    Statistics are a lot of times off and some are just wrong. I believe for the BW who have never been aproached by a WM it’s about location, where they live, how much they get out and places they go when they go out. As far as appearance just be confident, love yourself and your curves / hair. Always try to better yourself in life anyway possible. I am a BW happily married and my WM husband is right here agreeing with this comment, and he also adds: “If you dont put yourself (safely) out there, mingle and be noticed as an open minded woman, how will you give yourself a fair chance. Eventually the right WM will aproach you, if its meant to be it will; regardless of any racial barrier you may or may not experience. And high self worth is always attractive.”

  • Mwenya

    Since when was a survey of six women worth publishishing? I am less then impressed by the regurgitated rhetoric.

  • Derrick Witherspoon

    We are naturally attracted to black men but the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race”—————-

    Why was my comment deleted? Only 10% of black males are married to white women, it is totally inaccurate to say that the “majority” of black males are out here with white women. All of internet media seems to be pushing to get whites and non-whites in bed with each other….

    Why don’t I ever see an article about the whopping 40 and 30 percent of Asian and Hispanic women, respectively, who marry white men…and that Asian and Hispanic males should look to black women (you know since “the majority” of the brothers allegedly are out with white women, or on the “down low”, or in prison) to compensate? 

    It simply doesn’t happen. All “media outlets”, including the ones supposedly “for” black people seemed hell bent on promoting sexual intercourse between white men and non-white women…and since their number has already worked on Latinos and Asians, and to some degree Native Americans, they are now turning to black women.

    • angieb71

       Black women should sate whom ever they want tooand do not worry about what others say and think about them . Their are other men in the world. 

  • Derrick Witherspoon

     “We are naturally attracted to black men but the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race.”Last time I checked, only 10% of black men married women who are not black. Just another black male bashing propaganda story IMO.

  • Barbaralee1146

    Women are sometimes fragile, want a real-man to protect you? Come –uniformedkiss.c0m–,
    here you will meet lots of servicemen and find friendship, love, romance,
    marriage or even more with those armed forces, police, navy, security, medical,
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  • Hannah

    Hi All,
    Actually I don’t think this article reflect us -Black British Women- I don’t know about the Americans… Most of my friends, people I met would describe me as STUNNING Lady .. I have been approached by different races : Asians, Black nd White… I RATHER to date BLACK or Mix Race Because TO ME they are more ATTRACTIVE..its just matter of Preference you like Tea , I like Coffee…

    I have been approached by highly Educated, Wealthy…etc White Gentlemen, but although  I do respect ALL, I like black or Mix-race.. 99.9% of th black  ladies I know just like me; feel ‘Home’ with our men…IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ALL THE ”’ INSECURITIES”’ your article reflects… I worked, studied in places where I was the ONLY black and my Lecturers, Managers, Colleagues …etc were always checking me out… articles like this  , with due respect 2 u, are just UNFAIR and reflect a tiny minority of black women…

    Proud to be Black 

  • Whatev

    What a depressing and downright f*cked up article. And where is the fact published that “most” Black men MARRY outside their race? I have heard exactly the opposite. They may try the other flavors, but when it comes time to marry, they far and wide marry Black. In places like Los Angeles (where I am) it may seem they are all selling out but according to real facts that is not so.

    One reason you left out is we have no desire to wash out our melanin/features in our bloodline, and want to continue the Black race. If we can’t have a Black man and Black kids then some women won’t want another. Which lead me to another obvious point you left out.

    Black women have not forgotten history. Many don’t want to “Open up” to a white man, because of the genocide and destruction of our African culture, and abuse in America.

    This self-hate/selloutedness is a mess. I pray I find just one Black soldier.

    • Kiaser

      People who are willing to marry regardless of race are actually exhibited to opposite of self hatredness.  So many bw are so willing to be by the black man’s side but according to 2008 US Census Bureau, 22% of bm are married to or cohabitating with non bw.  And the more educated a man is the more likely he is to marry non bw.  You exhibit self hate b/c you are willing to not have children if you can not have a bm. You hate yourself so much that you are willing life of lonliness for a group of men who dont believe the same as you. I love myself enough to know by not turning down the love from my white husband (in hopes of beling with one black soldier) that I will have the life I want.  I love myself enough to know that Im not going to count on a group of men who are not providing for their women and in high amounts not choosing me although our skin colors match.  Women like you stress self hate and selloutness while being 40+ still hoping for your king.  Your king, especially in LA, isnt checking for you. 

      • Kiaser

        Read the comments from the bm on this post, they are not in support of you.  They are throwing women of our color (the same color as them) under the bus. 

        • angieb71

            Dear SIsters
                                            Their are too many men too worry about BLACKMEN!!!!!!!

      • Derrick Witherspoon

          So many bw are so willing to be by the black man’s side but according to 2008 US Census Bureau, 22% of bm are married to or cohabitating with non bw.”

        How is 22% (1 and 5) the majority?

        • Kiaser

          Did I say it was the majority?  No.  I didnt mention anything about MAJORITY.

        • angieb71


      • angieb71

         YOU ARE SO RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Anony

    Sincerely, I found this article useless and a gross generalisation. Why did you not just write at the top, in my own opinion cus honestly unless your sources are the girls you meet in the hairdressers, I find these ‘reasons’ ridiculous and untrue. Black women do date white men, that is the women who aren’t blinded by what colour they’re skin is to put themselves down for bein the way God made them. You first four ‘reasons’ or should I say excuses are merely insecurities that a black woman may have that would prevent her from pursuing a white man, and even at that – they’re an assumption. You assume white men are not going to know about black women’s hair – we’re in the 21st Century, multiculturalism is everywhere so that’s a ridiculous assumption. You assume a white man is going to only want to date a girl of his own stature/class; again an assumption. And we all know that class is not something you can buy or learn in a classroom, it’s in the way you carry and value yourself. Treat yourself like a crumpled up 5 pound note, and you’ll surely act like one too. You say that all the black men are interacially dating, is there an invisible barrier that stops black women from socialising with other races and therefore opening up the opportunities to form an interracial friendship even?? After reading this useless diatribe of useless, outdated, closeminded nonsense I figured out the essential problem. Why are you suggesting that there have to be reasons for why a black woman might not date a white man, a hispanic man or even a black african dating a black european? Surely we should respect ourselves for who we are and date whoever we see fit, regardless of what colour they’re skin is or how much money they make. I would never let my hair stop me from going out with a guy, that’s just ridiculous. And I say this as a black, african woman who has lived in 3 continents and dated guys; I’ll not reduce them to the colour of they’re skin because it’s about time we all started to look further than the shade God painted us!

  • Guest

    So Black women are fat, dumb, poor and have major hair issues … got it… 95% of this article was what’s wrong with Black women or how we don’t “measure up.” Am I supposed to think I’m actually special because a Caucasian man finds me attractive? Is that what it’s come to seeking validation of beauty/self-worth from an inter-racial relationship. Really? 

  • NikoWozz

    I am a 27 years old doctor,mature and beautiful. and now i am seeking a good man who can give me real love, so i got a sername Andromeda2002 on  Agedate.СòM, a nice and free place for younger women and older men,or older women and younger men, to interact with each other.Maybe you wanna check out or tell your friends.

  • Msddre

    LOL! go somewhere, fido.

    • ClassyInHtown

      Sure Scooby

  • Alexis

    I am a very dark-skinned black woman and have all shades of men approaching me. I do mean ALL shades. As I get older, white men are starting to approach me just as much as black men. I do prefer black men, but have dated a lot of shades. I will admit I discriminate, but in height only. If he’s tall and approaches me with respect, the chances of him getting my number are high.

    • Rick

      Apparently I don’t fit the statistical norm. I’m a white guy and I am much more attracted to black women. Of course I like women in general, but I’d rather date black women when possible.  


  • The hilarity of all this is I posted 2 entries that had to be ‘APPROVED’ before posting, And I guess they didn’t meet the requirements. ITS ridiculous because CARIBBEAN IN THE HOUSE & 1 of these ANONYMOUS’ are saying any and everything they want, AND ITS GETTING PUBLISHED. Well I’m just going to try to make my point once more, but I know it wont be posted. The facts are THE CARIBBEAN ISLANDS were enslaved by Europeans and given your freedom after abolition. ITS A FACT!! So whether they say it to your face or not, Africans consider ya’ll Eupo— whatever your Island is TOO!! And Africans really shouldn’t talk $%^T!! White people run South Africa & many many other countries of Africa. THEY CAN’T STAND UP TO THE MAN, so they take their issues out on American Blacks. Just like the Caribbean/Island FOLKS. They can’t talk s%^t to ‘THE MAN’ so they hate on American Blacks. BUT maybe soon they will get over all the SELF HATE they spit out!! I’m only commenting through you, MIKIMII cause for some reason I’ve been trying to past today and I can’t seem to get through. I LIKE YOUR POST< SO this is not to you. ITS JUST A GENERAL POST TO EVERYONE!!

    • Caribbean in the house

      wrong stupid b!tch you dumb afro-american negro, go stick to the cotton feild because you don’t know my culture. we were not enslaved by the european & the clansmen don’t exisist in the 3rd world brainless girl. it was the spaniards took us into slavery, from africa to the caribbeans/westindies. then they [the spaniards killed off the arawak indians & put us in chains. then the british people came around & challenged the spaniards in a war & the british won & have the spaniards running. then the british took over slavery & enslaved the caribbean/westindies people.

                                                                                                    you have the nerve to talk about the real africans from africa when they took down several black hawks which you negro’s couldn’t because you afro-american negro’s were busy on the cotton field picking it with no benefits, pay or 401K plan. go see or google the movie in “black hawk down” its a true story. dumb broad.

    • Anonymous

      Oh ..are you tryna get started again…?
      You say plenty of shiit too and you just hate the fact no ones going to put up with it…if you can’t stand the heat stay the F out the kitchen sweetie!

  • I didn’t have a problem with anything in your post. I liked it. But MY POSTS kept getting denied, so I tried with the first post after my last one. SORRY!!

  • THE HILARITY of all this is, I have posted at least 3 entries that were evidently, TOO MUCH FOR WHOEVER runs this MESS!! BUT somehow CARIBBEAN IN THE HOUSE & the ANONYMOUS that keeps posting the most negative things they can come up with ISN’T BEING CENSORED!! That’s ludicrous. BUT anyway I JUST WANT THE ONE POINT I MADE TO BE POSTED. OF COURSE since they censored me twice, most likely they will again. But I can try. TO ANYONE LISTENING, when brought from Africa we as a whole were separated & sent to different corners of the earth WIT A MASSA SUH!! I hope no Islanders or Haitians actually believe you decided as a people to rise up and migrate from Africa. BECAUSE its BS!! That being said, IF ANY AFRICANS are calling American Blacks, European Negros….. REST ASSURED THEY ARE CALLING YOU European —Whatever Island you are from!! Believe it. After all, Africans know better than some historians the FACTS THAT slavery being abolished is what allowed ya’ll to ‘TAKE BACK’ your nation. ITS A FACT< LOOK IT UP!! And Africans don't need to speak on American Blacks, with their nose turned up. White people RUN SOUTH AFRICA & a lot of the other countries in Africa. I guess that's how they make themselves feel good. THEY ARE TOO AFRAID to stand up to 'THE MAN' so they take their frustrations out on American Black. Just like the people from the Islands, THEY NEED A SCAPEGOAT!! ANYWAY I've probably wasted my time, cause this post probably wont go through again.

    • Caribbean in the house

      wrong stupid b!tch you dumb afro-american negro, go stick to the cotton feild because you don’t know my culture. we were not enslaved by the european & the clansmen don’t exisist in the 3rd world brainless girl. it was the spaniards took us into slavery, from africa to the caribbeans/westindies. then they [the spaniards killed off the arawak indians & put us in chains. then the british people came around & challenged the spaniards in a war & the british won & have the spaniards running. then the british took over slavery & enslaved the caribbean/westindies people.

      you have the nerve to talk about the real africans from africa when they took down several black hawks which you negro’s couldn’t because you afro-american negro’s were busy on the cotton field picking it with no benefits, pay or 401K plan. go see or google the movie in “black hawk down” its a true story. dumb broad.     


        • Lol, Nelson. How is he allowed to post with all the cursing? I am starting to believe that he is an employee of MN because there is no way in the world that he;d get past moderation with the first sentence alone. 

          • I think so TOO. He has to be in order to get away with those posts.


  • TOO AFRAID to stand up to ‘THE MAN’ so they take their frustrations out on American Black. Just like the people from the Islands, THEY NEED A SCAPEGOAT!!

  • AND I’m just speaking to whoever needs to know. I’M NOT TALKING TO ANYONE SPECIFIC!!

  • Caribbean in the house

    don’t date any afro-american negro ho white man, not unless you’re raping them like your fore fathers did back then.

    • Hawk

      You mean like their fore-fathers raped YOUR fore-mothers, hence your sorry and pathetic existence!

      I’ve been reading your comments on this article and frankly, YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO YOUR RACE!

      Now do us all a favour and jump in front of a speeding train!

  • MikiMii

    I enjoyed this article. I feel that if a Black American woman truly wants a man, any man, then first, she should take a step back and analyze HERSELF and not others. Don’t worry about what Black Men are doing right now, don’t worry about how some non-black men feel about some Black women. Just go for it. It’s about YOU and no one else. As a Black American Woman, I’ve had great success across the board when it comes to dating b/ca I feel I’ve chosen right. I’m not spefically looking for a particular type of man. Just a good one.
    On a side note: I think an article that would become seriously popular on this site would be one about the interracial partners we choose. Do we, as black men and women SETTLE when we choose people outside our race but set higher standards from people with in. I shop at Walmart. I’m not ashamed. When I shop I see Black American Men with white women who look like White Society’s reject women. I’ve seen fairly good looking black men with white women who are incredibly obese on those mobile shopping carts. I see them with uneducated white women who chain smoke with a few missing teeth. I also see Black American Women with either ‘wiggers’ or white men so old their Birth Certificates might have expired. What’s up people! What are you DOING?! (I’m joking, to an extent….)

  • MikiMii

    I enjoyed this article. I feel that if a Black American woman truly wants a man, any man, then first, she should take a step back and analyze HERSELF and not others. Don’t worry about what Black Men are doing right now, don’t worry about how some non-black men feel about some Black women. Just go for it. It’s about YOU and no one else. As a Black American Woman, I’ve had great success across the board when it comes to dating b/ca I feel I’ve chosen right. I’m not spefically looking for a particular type of man. Just a good one.

    On a side note: I think an article that would become seriously popular on this site would be one about the interracial partners we choose. Do we, as black men and women SETTLE when we choose people outside our race but set higher standards from people with in. I shop at Walmart. I’m not ashamed. When I shop I see Black American Men with white women who look like White Society’s reject women. I’ve seen fairly good looking black men with white women who are incredibly obese on those mobile shopping carts. I see them with uneducated white women who chain smoke with a few missing teeth. I also see Black American Women with either ‘wiggers’ or white men so old their Birth Certificates might have expired. What’s up people! What are you DOING?! (I’m joking, to an extent….)

  • YOU TRULY ARE A SAD MIXED UP INDIVIDUAL!! So this definitely will be my last post RESPONDING TO YOU!! I refuse to let you ‘GET YOUR ROCKS OFF’ by insulting me, because you are not worth the time. BUT UM I am quite sure your ‘actual name’ isn’t CARIBBEAN IN THE HOUSE! If so then you are the one with the idiot @$$ mother. No disrespect Ma’ am whoever you are. BUT I THINK IT’S QUITE OBVIOUS that people have screen names. IT’S my last name f@#$%ng DUMB@$$!! I’m  Regina…. Too bad that isn’t GHETTO OR whatever you want to call ALL AMERICAN BLACKS. You’ve heard of Queen Elizabeth Regina?? Look it up. She was real. But you don’t know & can’t know how each and every one of us live. IT’S NONSENSE. You are up here going in on Black Americans like ALL THE BLACK PEOPLE you’ve met have done something negative to you. But That’s Not Possible. It’s in fact impossible and just ridiculous. UNLESS YOU HAVE ONLY MET 1 or 2. OR MAYBE ON FAMILY!! Man get out of here with that crap. You hate BLACK AMERICANS because we wont accept why were here. You’ve conformed and so have ALL THESES PEOPLE you say feel the same way about us as you do. ANYWAY all and all your opinion is just that. So have it; I have my opinion. BUT post what you want from here on out. I’m done responding to you. HAVE A NICE LIFE MISTER CARIBBEAN IN THE HOUSE! Nice chattin wit ya!! I guest I can give you a lil Ebonics as you say we all use. HAHAHA!! You are funny though. Your views are at least….

    • Nointerruptions

      The reason why he continues to troll this site is b/c he gets attention.  Of people ignore and not respond he will not choose MN as a forum to express his ignorance.  You say that he is not worth your time, but you spent time responding to him.  IGNORE HIM.

      • Caribbean in the house

        are you up for the challenge afro-american negro, come i have something for you then. behold….i hold in my right hand a NOOSE ready for your neck man, please help me because my noose is starving & it needs to be fed o.k. punk. its favorite course meal is negro neck with hot sauce or barbecue sauce so if you could help me help you that would be just fine & dandy. hurry, it will die on me & i don’t know what to do. i supposed i could go on wefare & get foodstamps or wic check but i don’t think they have negro neck in the supermarket & i don’t think my noose will eat dog food.

    • Caribbean in the house

      go drink a cup of kum afro-american negro

    • Caribbean in the house

      thats right stupid b!tch, drink my cup of seed & run, i don’t need your mouth anymore so peace out. you see my caribbean/westindies people, i’m winning the war for you because i’m here to protect you. this is why i stick by my introduction by saying……….

      my words are like BRUCE LEE, i can’t be defeated, my encouragement & bravery is as strong as SAMSON & my heart is as heartless as PHARAOH’S heart.

      under any circumstances no afro-american negro’s is a match for me because they always run in the end when they challenge me so therefore if you NEGRO’S diss my caribbean/westindies people again prepare for my consequences & wrath upon you. to bad this broad won’t talk to me anymore because her mouth piece was good on my wood.

  • I’m sorry that the only non black men that have approached you have only wanted a blow job, but that $%^T isn’t even realistic. I have been approached by men of many different ages, races, and back rounds. And as sad as it is to say, black men have been the ones to turn the conversations to a sexual situation first. SO EVEN IF THAT’S WHAT THEY ARE AFTER, they aren’t so bold to just be putting it out there like that. NOT WHERE I’M FROM!!

    • Caribbean in the house

      shut the f*** up you afro-american negro b!tch, you’re ugly & you should get punched in the face for being ulgy & go get rape by the clu clux clan members.

  • Veeyah

    I’m a black female and to be honest I disagree I’ve dated a few white men and I think it was all about attitude. People are too fixated on the colour of their skin rather then their personality. I ALWAYS get hit on by white guys simply because they find me (as an individual) approachable ie, when theyre looking I smile. as they say “looks attract them, but personality’s what makes them stay” some females just need to work on their character and come to realise and be open to the fact that they could end up with someone of a different ethnic background. Being closed minded as a black woman only makes it harder on us.

    • anon

      My husband is white. I am blk. We have baby on the way Crazy thing is my dad and brother are upset. Both married a non blk women, one an asian & other a white woman.

      • Veeyah

        thats upsetting to hear what you’re going through but I think the best thing for you to do is to focus on the blessing thats coming your way. besides we all know it, mixed raced children are some of the most beautiful looking people in the world. be proud of the man you love no matter who he is or where he comes from. Any woman is lucky to find a man who loves them regardless of what people think of them, and that sweetheart is a blessing in itself.. so keep counting your blessing love 🙂 x

        • Msddre

          “besides we all know it, mixed raced children are some of the most beautiful looking people in the world.”

          i wouldn’t go so far as that. just make sure that these kids don’t end up confused and all messed up in the head.

          • Auzzieborn

            Haha I’m mixed an I think I turned out fine 🙂 Ive travelled the world, have a good paying job and have beautiful men of all different races approach me. I guess it really is the way you carry yourself, brazilians are amongst the most beautiful looking people in the world and that’s due to this mixture in their race. I find it beautiful anyways 🙂

      • They are just being hypocrites. It’s ridiculous, but it is what it is. I think the problem BM have with BW dating non Black men is that  their reasons(black men) for dating outside are different from a woman’s. MOST OF THE TIME men do it for acceptance, power, and to build their self worth. Where as the average Black woman dating another race(notice I said average) is truly seeking love. SO THEY KNOW, your father & brother that your love is pure and from the heart. I’m not saying they don’t love who they are with because I couldn’t know that. I do know though, they are envious of what you have, and don’t want your happiness coming from a WM. So as I said earlier, they are being hypocrites!! THEY WANT TO HAVE THEY’RE CAKE but don’t want you to eat any. Listen sweetie, enjoy your baby & your man. AND SEE WHO HAS THE HAPPIEST most prosperous relationship. GOOD LUCK!!

        • Caribbean in the house

          hey nappyheaded ho go get raped by the clu clux clan or something.

      • Nointerruptions

        Im black, my husband is white.  We also have a baby on the way.  In my family the older generation (women) push my generation to date non bm.  All of the men in my family have babies by non bm, none are married to these women and none pay support nor see these children.

    • deb

      yeah even if you are super attractive, approachability and friendliness is important with attracting human being period. If you come of as cold only super brave, cocky guys or super ugly guys (who just don’t care) will approach you. No average guy would approach a woman thinking there was a big chance she’d turn him down.

  • Marina

    How about for this whole year everyone stop mentioning hair. Just do what you have to do with it and let it be done already. That goes for white people or other non-blacks who are holding up their hair against everyone as the only thing they have over somebody, it’s says very little about your personalities and it’s boring too. And so is long hair over the butt, just cut it and style it already, everyone obsessed with long hair. Ok keep it tamed, natural/texturized whatever, healthy and grow it to a reasonable length, but please STFU about it. Boring as hell.

    • As far as HAIR GOES, women of all races ESPECIALLY ENTERTAINERS wear wigs, hair pieces, and weaves these days. ALL OF THEM!! So hair should be taken out the equation all together.

      • Caribbean in the house

        its your afro-american negro race who wears stinky weaves.

  • Anonymous

    If only white women were as obsessed with black men as brothers are with them. But we all know that just watching the stories in the media…Terrance howard..Kobe Bryant..Barry Bonds…Micheal Strahand…Tiki Barber….Dennis Rodman…Diddy…Montell Williams…Tiger Woods…
    The few White Women that actually Marry Black Men are the exception and all you have to do is check the Census Bureau..matter of fact WW step over BM to marry Latino guys!!  Which is hilarious since BM have been here way longer so you would think it would be just the opposite!
    Most WW only want to experience sex with a BM then go right back to their own race but these delusional BM try so hard to make people think all WW want them so they worship third rate WW like Cocoa and Kim K…I wonder why WW like Megan Fox and Angelina Jolie don’t date BM? Even  WW like Fergie..Pink..Christina Aguliar and Brittany Spears that have done R&B music and been around BM don’t date them…hmmmm….. BM  are so in denial!

  • Real!

    If only white men were as obsessed with black women as sisters are with them. The few white men who actually MARRY black women are the exception. Most white men only want oral sex from black women. They tell their friends about the “freaky black chick I got head from.” I know there are many black women who can relate to this but will never admit it.

  • HumanBeing

    Oh my god, you guys are all ridiculous. What the hell does it matter anyways. I’m a white man, I think all women are beautiful. This hate of other races is just sickening. For me it is never about the color of a girls skin, it is about who they are as a person. Your skin color only defines who you are if you let it. Be proud of your heritage, but don’t let the past ruin what can be a great future for all people. I dated a beautiful black woman, who has a family that is very proud of their heritage, but they always treated me as one of them. Why can’t we all do that for each other.

    • tonyrogf


    • MsTG416

      To answer your last question…because society won’t let us. It is unfortunate too.

  • Baiaforever

    I’m a black woman and I dated a white guy for two years and he loved my hair ( it was permed) and didn’t mind when I got a weave either (he thought it looked nice). In fact he was married to a white woman for a while but then he said he didn’t like to date white women anymore, he just preferred black women. no Asian or Hispanic women so it is not always the case that all white men will be obsessed over hair and curves. In fact he liked my curves and said white women were too flat. I think if  you look good and present yourself in a nice way, different types of men will be attracted to you no matter what. I also dated a Moroccan guy and Hispanic guys. Black women just have to be approachable and confident in themselves.

    • LJ

      I have been with a white guy for 7 seven years and the furthest thing from their minds is whether you have hair like rapunzel, they comment on when you dress up nicely and get on with their lives. If they are not an attention seeking nightmare and have other things going on in their lives, such as a job, aspirations then they have more interesting and important things to get on with their lives about. (sigh)

  • Tanjoniquebs

    This is a pretty good article. I mostly agree with the point that black women are usually not approached by white men. I have been approached by a white man twice. The first time I didn’t even take down his number because I was in the process of moving to a different state. The second time, it never led to a relationship. I would love to date outside my race but it is so hard because other races of men don’t approach me.

  • i said it

    wow!! 2 pictures of black women paired up with non-black men. inside an article about not dating white men. yeah i did stop reading at this point!

  • i said it

    if a black woman chose to date a white man , wouldnt it be through college or workplace equally yoked. in addittion to black women saying they are TOO educated, or earn to much for some black men then. so there must be another class you speak of that is below the generalized class of white america, and above the generalized class of black america?

  • Idklux

    how can this be true: “If we perm it we’re considered “white washed”. If we have a weave, we aren’t happy with who we are and would really like to be a white woman. Regarding hair we just can’t seem to win. Since this is already a touchy subject in the black community” AND THIS BE TRUE? “a black man would understand more because he was raised by a black woman” WOW! PAGE 3 of not making sense!

  • i said it

    last comment mysteriously erased

    didnt you “Black men have made it no secret their liking to white women” sooooo how can “Many studies show that black men prefer woman with curves” and  what about the slim black women?

    • Idklux

      didnt you *say

  • tell em i said it

    funny. the previous page you stated that black men have kept no secret for their liking of white women. soooooooo. where did the “Many studies show that black men prefer woman with curves” go? right out the window with the logic of this BS propoganda

  • Greggluongo

    I wish i would have dated a Black Queen!!! my family was very racist and I needed her to be Loved not Hated!!1

  • As a white man who enjoys dating black women (of all sizes, hair types, and colors), I have had the most success via the internet, generally when I attempt to make eye contact and flirt with black woman, I am rebuffed, I am not sure but I am afraid it is because black women see the white men who approach them as quick pickup rather than someone who is a serious candidate for a long term relationship.

    I just want you to know that I and most people I know see you as a beautiful woman we want to get to know, it may go nowhere, we may end up as friends or much more, but please don’t blow us all off before we open our mouths, many of us are looking for the love of our lives, and our hope is that it just might be you.

  • history

    When will black women leave poor Robert Deniro alone? He is the exception not the rule. Black women look at the VERY few white men who actually have healthy and loving MARRIAGES to black women and conclude that all white men want a black woman. How delusional can a person be. How many white men actually want a black child? If a significant number did racism would not exist. Some black women are so self-hating that they will have sex with a white supremacist and find a way to blame black men.

    • Anonymous

      Probably when BM leave poor Kim Kardashian alone! She is also the exception to the rule and to be honest we don’t know who she’ll end up with!!.
      The White Women that do marry Black Men usually do it for money and if you check the stats on WW/BM marrioages they are off the chain so please stop trying to act like these marriages are sucessful. Futhermore not many WW want Black children either  and mistreat these children once they gop back to White Men. Terrance Howard’s wife said it all!
      Some Black Men are so self hating They have sex with White Supremacists also and find a way to blame Black Women.

      • Anonymous

        *typo*  the divorce rate is off the chain.

  • ManOrWoman

    The majority of black men marry outside of their race?  When did this happen? 

    • NEVER!! It’s a FARCE!! Several races date interracially. But in general, MOST COUPLES are same race couples. It doesn’t matter what you see day to day or on the TEL- LIE- VISION, because it is impossible to ever meet every couple or person. But the media and written entertainment is just selling this IR dating theory. NOT THAT I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT, it’s just not as prominent in the US as they portray.

  • Pillsbury DoughBoy

    Most white women who date black men do so because it makes the white women look better in contrast.

  • Tired..

    Wow!  What women were you surveying…….
    I know many interracial couples…black/white, black/hispanic, black/asian, etc……
    For the Black women, that are having these insecurities/stereotypes…..please……you had better get over these insecurities and open your heart to happiness….love……etc….  Everyone deserves to be happy…whether if you are with someone that is white/black/asian/hispanic/whatever……Why should you handicap yourself with insecurities/stereotypes…..
    Last time I check…anyone can where wigs/weave/whatever.  Anyone can achieve success. 
    …And yes, I am a woman of color….and proud.

  • Tired..

    Wow!  What women were you surveying…….
    I know many interracial couples…black/white, black/hispanic, black/asian, etc……
    For the Black women, that are having these insecurities/stereotypes…..please……you had better get over these insecurities and open your heart to happiness….love……etc….  Everyone deserves to be happy…whether if you are with someone that is white/black/asian/hispanic/whatever……Why should you handicap yourself with insecurities/stereotypes…..
    Last time I check…anyone can where wigs/weave/whatever.  Anyone can achieve success. 
    …And yes, I am a woman of color….and proud.

  • Ai

    I hope you didn’t base your article on the comments of 6 women. Why not poll all of the readers instead?

  • Ai

    I hope you didn’t base your article on the comments of 6 women. Why not poll all of the readers instead?

  • Lianwhite51

    I know we men have lots of standards to pick up a woman, and there’s
    one website that can almost meet all our different demands:
    (((( B-l-a-c-k-w-h-i-t-e-P-l-a-n–e-t. c-0-m )))) my bros told me
    this; it worked for them, it worked for me; and i’m sure it’s gonna work for u,

    I know we women have lots of
    standards to pick up a man, and there’s one website that can almost meet all
    our different demands:
    ( B-l-a-c-k-w-h-i-t-e- P-l-a-n–e-t. c-0-m ) my sisiter told me this; it worked
    for her, it worked for me; and i’m sure it’s gonna work for u, buddy!!

    Could he NOT find a censored
    version? Grandma: Is this how we are supposed to bond?

  • tayla

    im glad my husband is white…just saying x

  • ElonNicole

    Now, I usually appreciate and enjoy your articles but this one was just downright ignorant. Too much generalizing. 

  • WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?? Or better yet, what am I cheering?? ARE YOU ON SOMETHING?? Never mind because I can’t even figure out why I am bothering to respond to nonsense!! ANONYMOUS LEAVE ME ALONE or post something relevant. DUMB@$$!!

    • Anonymous

      You stupid jerk!!
      How the hell you gonna tell me to leave you alone and you started this shiit?
      Take your meds..loosen your weave or stop talking shitt if you can’t back it up at your silly azz tryna play the victim!  DOUCHEBAG!!!!!

      • I didn’t sart anything with you, I commented on a comment. You know, what this is set up for us to do. I’M SORRY THAT I CAN DO IT WITHOUT coming out in attack mode, EVERY MOTHERF$%^ING POST!! GHEESH< CALM THE H$LL DOWN!! Is it that serious for you?? It seems that your DUMB@$$ is the one withouth a life because YOU ARE CONSTANTLY trying to have arguments, instead of just discussions. YOU HAVE A PROBLEM SIR!! But that's you deal. WHATEVER!!

        • Anonymous

          No Ugly Dog you started this shiit so stop playing the victim…next time keep you bad weave wearing silly mouth shut and stay outta people’s business! Im not calming down for shiit beast!  Whoopi Goldberg lookin ho*!!!

  • MrsJones

    I realize this is just a blog, but really, what kind of ‘study’ is based on a survey of SIX women?  And then to post nonsense like “the majority of black men…marry outside their race” is just nonsense and completely unsupported by facts.

    FACT, SPELL and GRAMMAR check please! 

  • ALL IN ALL, it just is what it is. MAYBE its where you are from or where you have been. I am 37, and have never dated outside my race. AND BELIEVE ME, I have been approached my Asians, Whites, Indians(Pakistan) and even Arabs. I never dated outside my race because I WAS ALWAYS ATTACHED to a black man. I have 2 children by the same man who I married!! We are going through a divorce now, but that’s neither here nor there. I’m just making the point that your stereotypes are not VALID IN MY LIFE AT ALL. And I know plenty black women who fit the same description as myself. I am 5’0, 126lbs, (in the gym 3 to 5 times wkly) and STACKED IN THE BACK!! I would date outside my race if the right person comes along. BUT TRUST ME, black women IN GENERAL are not sitting around trying to figure out why ‘WHITE MEN’ wont date us. THAT is the biggest FALLACY that has been put out there. It’s a farce people!! Don’t believe the hype.

    • ElonNicole

      “BUT TRUST ME, black women IN GENERAL are not sitting around trying to figure out why ‘WHITE MEN’ wont date us. THAT is the biggest FALLACY that has been put out there. It’s a farce people!! Don’t believe the hype.”


  • Knowledgecollege

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  • darkman

    This article is funny and has no reason to exist, except to encourage comments. To do a survey, you need 950 people from all socio economic background, not 6… And no, the majority of BM are not dating or marrying WW.

    You forget a good reason why BW don’t date WM: social pressure from family or the street.

  • darkman

    This article is funny and has no reason to exist, except to encourage comments. To do a survey, you need 950 people from all socio economic background, not 6… And no, the majority of BM are not dating or marrying WW.

    You forget a good reason why BW don’t date WM: social pressure from family or the street.

  • kay

    I’m an African-American 17 year old girl, and I’ve always dated white guys. I’m actually not very attracted to black / African-American guys. Maybe it has to do that I live in a state that is populated by mostly white people. 

  • kay

    I’m an African-American 17 year old girl, and I’ve always dated white guys. I’m actually not very attracted to black / African-American guys. Maybe it has to do that I live in a state that is populated by mostly white people. 

    • darkman

      That’s correct! If thereis no black people around you and you ended dating what’s available… But don’t limit yourself, the day you’ll meet a good black man, you won’t “go back” 😉

      • Mylife

        I grew up in Atlanta.  All black schools.  The day I met a good white man I never went back 😉

      • Mylife

        I grew up in Atlanta.  All black schools.  The day I met a good white man I never went back 😉

      • Mylife

        I grew up in Atlanta.  All black schools.  The day I met a good white man I never went back 😉

        • darkman

          😀 Good for you!!! I started with white girls (no black around) and ended with black women: couldn’t go back, even with all the drama!!!!

    • darkman

      That’s correct! If thereis no black people around you and you ended dating what’s available… But don’t limit yourself, the day you’ll meet a good black man, you won’t “go back” 😉

    • darkman

      That’s correct! If thereis no black people around you and you ended dating what’s available… But don’t limit yourself, the day you’ll meet a good black man, you won’t “go back” 😉

  • Ressie

    I am a black woman married to a white man! I have a big ass(he loves it),I am all natural with my hair(he loves it) I own my own business(he’s a semi truck driver)….doesnt matter the color,you like who you like,you love who you love! This race crap is so for the birds……….can we move on!

  • Ressie

    I am a black woman married to a white man! I have a big ass(he loves it),I am all natural with my hair(he loves it) I own my own business(he’s a semi truck driver)….doesnt matter the color,you like who you like,you love who you love! This race crap is so for the birds……….can we move on!

    • darkman

      You are right: only your personality should weigh in your relationship. And thanks for being natural.

    • darkman

      You are right: only your personality should weigh in your relationship. And thanks for being natural.

    • darkman

      You are right: only your personality should weigh in your relationship. And thanks for being natural.

  • why are you on here why do white people trying to come on here to pass as black your a AHOLE

    • PrimaFaciaTruth

      Probably the same reason black people run for president and try to pass as white.

      • James Lowrance

        Maybe you all should learn how to pass as humans instead of playing such lame a** race cards on each other. I am a fat middle-aged white man who does not give a flyin’ f**k about yer opinions of me! Come on down… Bring the hate. Show everyone out there what you are all about… LMFFAO

        • It’s not a ‘race card game’ as you so easily infantilized. It’s a real issue within the black community that is ugly but is good to be addressed and talked about, sometimes angrily. And as a fat middle aged white man, why are you concerned and furthermore what would you know about it to speak on it anyway?
          Old prejudiced self, using the internet to post on black blogs forums…you need to use google to read some online books.

      • Zulu Queen Anita

        The 1st presidents was black check the facts baby !

  • why are you on here why do white people trying to come on here to pass as black your a AHOLE

    • I’m white biotch. Wouldn’t want to be black, I love my white self. And I like black people too. Well the ones who aren’t racist and think up all these ignorant thoughts. You know black people are who made the word HATER.. Because they see it in their life so often. 🙂

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  • LotusLeader

    It’s really simple, no Super Bass!

  • Sakina Mengle

    This article is so ridiculous!!!  I am a black woman with very short, natural hair, very dark skin, no college degree.  I am happy and secure with my hair, my body and my intelligence.  I don’t have any problem with white men approaching me.  I don’t care one bit about their money, Harvard degrees, white girlfriends, etc.  It is all about confidence. White men like me because they understand that I am truly confident with who I am as a person.  They can get a white woman any day with long, straight hair. They love my hair, just as I do, and they embrace my uniqueness. Black women need to start loving themselves!  This is 2012, and black women don’t understand our amazing beauty???
    Are you kidding me???  Take the fake wigs off, get rid of the weaves, green contacts, be yourself, and understand that black women are truly AMAZING.  We are blessed in the most special way.  We are so distinguishable from any other woman on the planet! Why are black women constantly going against our own inherent beauty, and not appreciating it??  I don’t understand that mentality!!  Please, just love yourself, and the dating doors will sling wide open for you from all avenues, and yes, even upper Park Avenue!!

    • darkman

      When white men goes black, they generally look for the most natural and darkest one …

      • Mylife

        My husband who is white suggested I go natural because I keep complaining about issues with my perm. I prefer perm over natural. But all of his exes who are black had naturaal hair…hmmmm

        What does being natural have to do with being confident?

      • Mylife

        My husband who is white suggested I go natural because I keep complaining about issues with my perm. I prefer perm over natural. But all of his exes who are black had naturaal hair…hmmmm

        What does being natural have to do with being confident?

      • Mylife

        My husband who is white suggested I go natural because I keep complaining about issues with my perm. I prefer perm over natural. But all of his exes who are black had naturaal hair…hmmmm

        What does being natural have to do with being confident?

      • sakinamengle

        Well, Darkman, as I stated, a white man can get a white woman with long hair any day of the week, so perhaps you may have a point.  They are attracted to me because I am the complete opposite of the women they usually date.  I do seem to attract white men who have never dated black women in the past. They are generally very waspy, well educated, typical patricians. To the black women who are thinking about dating white men, “caveat emptor”. You must understand dating and marriage are two very separate things.  I do believe that more black men are actually married to white women because they are far more secure with themselves than white men are.  White men are okay. They are men, and they want great sex.  They are not any different from any other man!!!  I have found that most of them are just big cowards when the reality hits of an interracial relationship when it comes down to marriage. We still have many race issues in America. That is the reason we are discussing this article.  My former husband is white. I must give him KUDOS for dealing with what he had to deal with before and during our marriage. He has a very strong mind and he fought for our relationship. There were times when it was just exhausting for him. The average white man is not going to deal with that kind of pressure. So, ladies go right ahead and explore, but don’t expect to turn into Cinderella  because you are dating a white man.

        • deb

          I have found that most of them are just big cowards when the reality hits of an interracial relationship when it comes down to marriage. We still have many race issues in America.”

          this is very true. The dating scene in america is not normal in any way because of race issues. If race issues here weren’t as deep and hurtful, we’d see interracial marraiges of all types all the time. Anyway, i do think that if a guy from any background truly loves a woman, he’ll fight to be with her and it will be more apparent if he loves her in the face of adversity like race relations in this country.

          But it goes without saying that as IR dating between bw/wm is increasing marraiges between bw/wm seem to be increasing also. (i’m pretty sure there’s hard statistics to back that up now).

        • Herman

          A white man can go crazy..just like anybody else. HE usually takes the life from each family member in his anger. During the 1920s they jumped out of windows when they lost their high paying jobs.Death to them was better than shining shoes or being a butler or garbageman.(black man jobs)

    • darkman

      When white men goes black, they generally look for the most natural and darkest one …

    • darkman

      When white men goes black, they generally look for the most natural and darkest one …

  • Destiny

    This is the most small minded, insipid, vapid, archaic article I have ever read. EVER! Who are these six women you interviewed? Your like minded friends who too need to get their heads out of their asses? I am a black woman. I wear my hair natural. I am curvy yet fit. And I get approached by white men ALL the time. White boys love me. The same can be said for my black girl friends. I hope that in 2012 most progressive African American people find this article both moot and annoying. This type of thinking is what is holding us back. Black women let their own insecurities perpetuate and proliferate issues that would not exist otherwise. Go educate yourself.

    I’m not saying that there aren’t racist white people (just like there are racist blacks), and of course a few white men have the John Mayor syndrome of only being attracted to Caucasions (like some black men only liking black women.), but for the most part MEN OF ALL RACES ARE JUST ATTRACTED TO BEAUTY AND WE ALL KNOW BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL!

    I’m a black woman who has been dating her highly educated, successful, handsome white man who has as much “swag” as the best of them for over 2 years. I have dated pretty much every color under the sun because I am confident and not small minded. Break free of your own self inflicted chains, and you can do the same.

  • Ash

    This is such an ignorant article. #1, you are making assumptions that all white men are stuck in the early 1900’s. But even to that point, white men lusted for black women during that time period, they just weren’t supposed to. #2, I see black women with white men all of the time. You cannot say we are not attracted to white men. Everyone has their preferences of course, but if you see someone attractive it doesnt matter what race they are! #3, I am a black female with “natural” hair and am approached by white males all of the time, and they LOVE my hair. I honestly get more compliments from white males than I do black males. #4, how dare you short change all parties in this article by thinking white men are so shallow that they will only date a woman with the same amount of $$$ in their account, or that black females have a hard time earning as much or getting an education (so insulting), OR that white females are always financially equal to their partner. Since when weren’t white females the original goldiggers???? ANYWAY, if you feel this way I honestly feel sorry for you.

  • Tegareba

    I’m a black woman whom have dated white men in the past…I’ve realize for the most part the physical is what men of other races are attracted too, but there’s a downside if that is all what they see and want in you, that your just A “BLACK” woman with nice curves your relationship is already doomed. I’m not trying to make cheating a race issue cause men and women cheat from all racial backgrounds but speaking from my own experience if a man from a different race like/want you just for your skin color and not your personality or anything other than being black guess what? he wants every other black woman that he sees out there…Just be aware of the white men that has a black girl fetish  

    • darkman

      That’s what they call Jungle fever…

    • darkman

      That’s what they call Jungle fever…

    • darkman

      That’s what they call Jungle fever…

    • Torontochick

      My good, good white guy friend has a black girl fetish (actually, I’m too light for his tastes) and he’s only ever wanted one. I don’t even think it *is* a race issue, he’s a big teddy bear type of guy and those men rarely cheat.

    • Torontochick

      My good, good white guy friend has a black girl fetish (actually, I’m too light for his tastes) and he’s only ever wanted one. I don’t even think it *is* a race issue, he’s a big teddy bear type of guy and those men rarely cheat.

    • Torontochick

      My good, good white guy friend has a black girl fetish (actually, I’m too light for his tastes) and he’s only ever wanted one. I don’t even think it *is* a race issue, he’s a big teddy bear type of guy and those men rarely cheat.

  • Kittenatl

    This topic brings up other issues as well. One day I was at the park and I saw a White guy out with his mixed (black/white) daughter. I thought it was strange that it was my first time seeing a white guy out with his mixed kid.  So yes, White men and Black women are rare…

    • Deeon

      They are rare kinda but there are many mixed celebs with white fathers that you never hear about, such as Tia and Tamara, Lenny Kravitz, Slash, Kid Cudi’s father is Mexican, Lauren London, Bob Marley,Thandie Newton and many others.
       I also think that sometimes it’s because white men work a lot, (it sounds crazy). I have seen one ww with an Asian man, she had an Asian child with her and we were in this place for a long time, I go outside and this Asian man comes and picks them up. I think that wm/bw relationship are definitely becoming more because I see them way more often than before, but I think sometimes why you don’t see them is that both are living their lives and work, some bm and ww I feel like they always have to be in each others pockets and be around one another.

      Bw/wm, can be in places where they never see bm/ww relationships, like where they hang out. It happens to me but I will see bw with wm. My two aunts one was married to a white male and one was in a long term relationship, but I will have no other uncles I know that were with ww.

  • Kittenatl

    Why not do a survey on why White men don’t date black women?  I’m a black women, dark skin black woman at that. I work in the business district in a major city. I get stares from white men all the time, but they never approach me. I actually think they’re the ones that are intimidated by black women. They’re also afraid of rejection. Society has damaged the way we preceived each other.

    • Kat


    • Kat


    • Kat


  • Ebonydiva82

    MN Editor: Please don’t forget that black women are also DISCOURAGED and SHAMED by family members, friends and others in the black community NOT to date white men or non-black men for XYZ reason (none of which they can prove). It’s not just because of the reasons listed in the article. That is why it is SOOOOO (to the infinity) important for young black women to expose themselves to other cultures and broaden their horizons in order for them to develop minds of their own. It’s important for black women to have open minded people in their lives who have BROAD life experiences and who are not narrow minded and one sided. That way, they can just individuals as individuals and not lump sum them. If we only live our lives the way others dictate to us it should be lived, then who can we blame for being miserable, certainly not the dictators! In many instances, it is simply easier to let go of the negativity and REMOVE ourselves from these toxic environments so that we can develop our own minds. Despite the opinions in this article, many black women are continuing to find love with non-black men who genuinely cherish us on a DAILY BASIS. Also, regarding white men dating asian and hispanic women more than black women this is it: asian and hispanic women have made it known to white men that they are open to relationships with them. Think about it this way: would you continuously pursue a relationship with men who you have been brainwashed into believing don’t want you? I don’t think so. It;s common sense to pursue someone who you believe you may have a chance with as opposed to someone who would reject you.

    • Blackbutterfly117

      Say that! My mother is prejudiced and let me know her thoughts about White men and mixed relationships early on. After marriage with a black man that ended, I’m dating a white man. When I introduced them, she was so rude to him that I was embarrassed.

      Fast forward, I got sick and homeboy took care of me like a champ. Mom came around and saw that he is and has something that her SIL never was and did. 

      When we’re out, most of the frowns I get are from black men, and especially black men who are rolling with white women.

    • Blackbutterfly117

      Say that! My mother is prejudiced and let me know her thoughts about White men and mixed relationships early on. After marriage with a black man that ended, I’m dating a white man. When I introduced them, she was so rude to him that I was embarrassed.

      Fast forward, I got sick and homeboy took care of me like a champ. Mom came around and saw that he is and has something that her SIL never was and did. 

      When we’re out, most of the frowns I get are from black men, and especially black men who are rolling with white women.

  • Artstnmtn1

    top 5 reasons 1. they would rather waste their lives snarling and complaing about black men and white women, 2.they woud rather have a baby with someone who doesn’t love them enough to marry them, 3.they would rather be slapped around than loved, 4.they would rather cheat with smeone else’s sorry husband, 5. they would rather risk stds with dow-low brothers than date white men.

    • Caribbean in the house

      yep so so true afro-american negro chick.

      • Msdre

        mr batty man done got to your booty good.

  • Michael Holland

    A lot of us don’t appreciate spam, however, while you’re waiting for a bite you can always invite Michelle Obama to the Air Force Birthday Ball. 

  • juli_bean0385

    I think this article is hilarious.  My man is white. He asked me to STOP getting relaxers because he loves natural hair.  I’m a size 12 and he politely asked me not to lose the “booty”.  He loves the fact that I’m a college grad and now in nursing school.  HE approached me! (I originally thought he was a huge nerd, but the nerdiness grew on me :-)) Maybe if people could let go of whatever bullsh*t drives their ignorance, we could all be a lot happier.

    • Caribbean in the house

      listen afro-american negro, the only reason his with you because of the rape his fore fathers teach him & i know foe a fact that you’re not going to grow old with him. who ever heard of a 90 year old white man still with a 85 year old afro-american negro chick & by that time your azz is going to be soggy anyway.

      • juli_bean0385

        You should look up Loving v Virginia.  Then you should consider a basic English course.

        • Caribbean in the house

          just because the white gods of america gave you afro-american negros’ well some proper english does not mean you better yourselves & your some what of a culture that belongs to your master because you’re living off the white man culture calling yourselves americans wjen your not an all american according to the white people. go & congradulate them instead on hating on them for giving you their proper european speaking languages instead of your old fashioned EBONICS language witch the majority of your afro-american negro’s community still talk it because they don’t want to sound white. get my drift afro-american negro.

          • juli_bean0385

            I actually cannot stand ebonics.  I think it’s an insult to the English language and feel that people should take education seriously.  MY community speaks well and appreciates the King’s English.

          • brock Landers

            according to what white people? I am white, and I consider anybody who was born in the US, be they black, white, asian, hispanic, etc. to be an American, so long as the individual fulfills the citizenship requirements. Quit generalizing about all white people, your misguided opinions do not represent us.

        • Caribbean in the house

          man…igot to stop typing real fast & messing up on my words but oh well afro-american nergo’s, you get what i’m saying.

          • Destiny

            Caribbean in the house, you are disgusting and hopeless. Words cannot express how sorry I feel for you and your small disgusting mind. Get a damn life and an education.

          • NO, WE DON’T. We speak ENGLISH, B%^&H not IDIOT!

    • darkman

      Have you seen the movie Road Trip? That’s you and him… 😀

    • darkman

      Have you seen the movie Road Trip? That’s you and him… 😀

    • darkman

      Have you seen the movie Road Trip? That’s you and him… 😀

  • maggie

    Let the brainwashed black people die out (especially these black men.  In a few generations of mixing, their bloodline will be cut off).  Start with the children.  Adults are a waste of time.

    • Caribbean in the house

      yes thats why the white men should finish what they started by raping off the afro-american negro chick & bring forth the light skinned new generations.

      • Ya’ll ISLAND FOLKS, descend from Africans that were split into tribes and sent to different corners of the world. YOU DO KNOW THAT DON’T YOU?? Of course not cause you’re an IDIOT!! YOUR ANCESTORS WERE DEFINITELY RAPED & IMPREGNATED to create your @$$. SO YEAH, they should start with your ISLAND!! IGNORANT @$$ MOTHERF$%KER!!

  • Torontochick

    How on earth has this article gotten over 125,000 views and 651 comments? Jeez!

    Some really sensitive egos in these comments, guess it’s a sore spot for some people.

    Meanwhile, interracial couples just keep ticking along happily, as angry outsiders obsess over them. LOL

  • RahTruth

    I’m a Black woman. And, I date GOOD men, regardless of race.

    • Caribbean in the house

      but are you for free? do you charge guys for your puzzy

      • Msddre

        either way, you can’t afford it…

        • Ruff

          New debate: ARE most black women hookers? and white men TRICKS? look on Backpage and other sites and tell me.

  • real!

    Until black women discover a way to give birth to white children white men will not be interested in marriage. There is actually a reason why only 1 in 300 married white men have a black wife. Men date to have sex. For that reason a white man will DATE any attractive black woman. Marriage and carriage is a completely different story.

    • I don’t see value in Caucasian men to place them on a high pedestal as the desired mate or husband.  Caucasian men exude effeminate qualities.  They don’t represent the image of TRUE manhood–to me. I can see why Caucasian men are drawn to non-heterosexuality—and have made homosexual acts an INTEGRAL ritual for initiation to maintain SECRECY in their masonic lodges, fraternities, secret societies and covert organizations. 

    • Torontochick

      Interracial couples in general are more likely to cohabit than marry. One reason is that they tend to skew younger. Another reason is that they’re more progressive in their thinking. I live with my boyfriend, he’s white. All of his friends know that we live together, it’s not a secret! I’m close with his family. But we’re not sure marriage is for us. Having said this, I’m only 25 (soon to turn 26). Ask me again in ten years.

    • Artstnmtn1

      who are you talking about, those DOWN-LOW “CAUCASIANS”? 

      • DaisyDooks

        Are you an Albino-Neanderthal-Primate-Caucasian male?

    • Caribbean in the house

      men do date to get his rock off only & don’t want to stick with a nappyheaded ho & white men miss the rape when it comes to dating a afro-american negro chick because he’s fore father raped a negro chick before.

    • darkman

      Robert De NIro has 7 kids (one adopted) with black women he married (most): how about that? The democrat politician and former government department appointee Cohen (and I assume he’s jewish) is married with children with a sista. How about that?
      I see more and more white men proudly walking the street/mall with their mixed race kids. White men have their issues too, concerning black women and pressure of the society isn’t the lest of it. Give them the opportunity to expand our… race.

    • darkman

      Robert De NIro has 7 kids (one adopted) with black women he married (most): how about that? The democrat politician and former government department appointee Cohen (and I assume he’s jewish) is married with children with a sista. How about that?
      I see more and more white men proudly walking the street/mall with their mixed race kids. White men have their issues too, concerning black women and pressure of the society isn’t the lest of it. Give them the opportunity to expand our… race.

    • darkman

      Robert De NIro has 7 kids (one adopted) with black women he married (most): how about that? The democrat politician and former government department appointee Cohen (and I assume he’s jewish) is married with children with a sista. How about that?
      I see more and more white men proudly walking the street/mall with their mixed race kids. White men have their issues too, concerning black women and pressure of the society isn’t the lest of it. Give them the opportunity to expand our… race.

  • get real!

    Do black women understand the dfference between a white man who wants only sex and a white man who is interested in a serious relationship leading to MARRIAGE and CHILDREN? I am starting to think that many black women confuse the two. There are countless black owmen who are “dating” white men who will NEVER marry them. They have no interest in having black kids and getting close to her black family. When will black women finnally accept these facts?

    • DaisyDooks

      White men are NOT prizes.  It is insulting to our ancestors and a scourge upon BLACK bloodlines to intermarry with non-Blacks.

      • I’m with you. Some of these posts acting as if White men are the “chosen” and “cream of the crop” are laughable and UNREAL!! GTFOH…

        • DaisyDooks

          [Some of these posts acting as if White men are the “chosen”]  <<—This is insulting on so many levels!! 

          Thanks, Sis!

          • Truly! Yes, we’ve got some issues going down in our community that needs to be delved into and solved, but jumping ship on our men, women, children WILL NOT BE HAPPENING!  Things will turn around; the “sleeping giants” will awaken!

            • DaisyDooks

              the “sleeping giants” will awaken! <<—It's already happening around the world.  I see the evidence daily.

              • Caribbean in the house

                you mean the sleeping puzzy will never awake because afro-american negro’s will never unite.

            • Caribbean in the house

              of course you afro-american negro’s got some issues, is because you people still a puzzy to the cu clux clan members & like to complain alot.

          • Caribbean in the house

            probably they are since you afro-american negro’s are a f*** up.

            • DaisyDooks

              What I find suspicious and peculiar is that you don’t realize the ENTIRE AfRAkan race has challenges. What is your motive for instigating inter-cultural conflicts between Blacks? I do not recognize your intelligence.

      • Artstnmtn1

        it’s insulting for all you brothers to father all these kids then go spend most of your lives in prison. there are animals that take care of their off-spring better than many black men.

        • DaisyDooks

          Are you directing your response to me? I’m not male. Furthermore, take your Black male-bashing to another site. It’s trite and redundant.

        • Caribbean in the house

          its because like i said before, if your an afro-american negro, its too too bad

          • And You Are SO SO SAD, poor thing. BY THE WAS YOUR IS FOR POSSESSION, I am almost certain you meant YOU’RE. You know, for you are. TOO TOO BAD THAT YOU ARE IGNORANT.

    • Artstnmtn1

      theres something amiss here.  black women want to get married? then why are they still getting pregnant out of wedlock at a rate of 6 in 10? there are many white guys out there from 21-30 without children. black men, on the other hand, have to get someone knocked-up even though they will never stick around to provide support. go figure!

      • Caribbean in the house

        because you can’t turn a afro-american negro aunt jemima ho into a house wife thats why no man wants to marry you negro’s chick because its all about the puzzy. its your afro-american negro fault for spreading your legs to different men & no man wants a girl with alot of different baggage you sorry azz b!tch. plus white girls are better than an afro-american negro nappyheaded ho because white girls smell good & clean & not stanky like hoodrats.

      • This is how you can tell when a person has facts or is speaking from opinion. FIRST OF ALL, define your many, UHH with a percentage or something. BECAUSE ONE THING I AM DAMN TIRED OF HEARING, is how many children BLACK FOLKS have out of wedlock. For one that’s a stereotype that was debunked YEARS AGO~YES A FACT!! If you pay attention, ALL THESE LITTLE REALITY SHOWS about young mothers and all that JAZZ, 90% of those couples are white. I ONLY HAVE 2 friends that were not married to the father of their children. REAL TALK!! So get the F$%K OFF your high horse and learn some facts. OF COURSE IF ALL THE NEWS/TV shows is black women being single moms, that’s the general census, BUT THERE ARE MANY (yeah I say many since I don’t know the %) white women with children out of wedlock & that have several ‘BABYDADDIES’!!

    • juli_bean0385

      My white man and his white family are always hanging out with me and my black family.  I live with my man, we take vacations, we go visit my great-grandma in the nursing home.  But I take it that you find it ok that black men “date” white women and leave her when she pops out 3-4 biracial babies named “RaQuan”?! When will people realize that COLOR and LOVE don’t go hand in hand?  Good men and good women come in all shapes, sizes, colors, religions ect.  Bad men and women also come in these things.  I love it how so many black women will boast about how they “got some indian” in them.  But the moment one brings up dating outside of their “race”, they act like it’s 1942 and they’ll get killed just thinking it.  It’s 2012, let’s be open to love and not ignorance.

      • Caribbean in the house

        shut the f*** up nappyheaded ho

      • Tyra

        Love it! very well put! 

    • darkman

      I know 3 females siblings married with children with white men for ove 10 years now… Don’t limit your knowledge to your surroundings. Travel

    • darkman

      I know 3 females siblings married with children with white men for ove 10 years now… Don’t limit your knowledge to your surroundings. Travel

  • KittResin


    I this site’s lack of factual evidence is irritating. Reason #4 is BS. I work in the financial district of Manhattan, NY and I am approached by white males all of the time! More white men show their interest in me than black men! Mind you I am a Jamaican American female in her 20’s. I mean how do you ask ONLY SIX…SIX (6) black women?! You couldn’t find any more? There were only six available to interview?! SMFH.

  • mavis

    I am not attracted to white men, although I do see great looking white men, but I don’t feel that I would be able to trust a relationship with a white man.

  • Chynarose2011

    I hate that it seems insecurities are the basis of the answers for why black women don’t date white men.  I am a white woman married for decades to a white man, and the women in my own circles, which covers a few states over a few decades, the women I have the most fun with and feel so good with are black women.  They have such higher standards of self respect more often than not, in my experience.  I have learned so much about how NOT to be treated from watching the examples of how my friends will respond to a situation versus how I did, and their attitudes are generally way healthier mentally!  I prefer to not worry about race cause it is so dumb that skin color counts at all, but if I had to pick a race to follow for role models. well, Rosa Parks for one, is ENOUGH!  Were that I only anywhere like her lololol.  Ladies, love yourselves, and if you don’t know how, find out — doesn’t matter what your race is – YOU ARE WORTH IT.

    • darkman

      Great comment. Black women are strong. Insecurity if any, isn’t in their dating game

    • darkman

      Great comment. Black women are strong. Insecurity if any, isn’t in their dating game

    • darkman

      Great comment. Black women are strong. Insecurity if any, isn’t in their dating game

  • zolo

    I just love ALL women! Is there something wrong with me? Please… stop with the race narrow minded BS…

  • Claire

    Maybe because I lived in California, but I had no problem pullin’ white men. *shrug*
    In Texas, it’s a different story though. It’s really a regional thing in my opinion.

    • Torontochick

      I definitely agree, it’s a regional thing. From what I gathered from the comments here, interracial relationships are quite common in some parts of the US and frowned upon in others.
      Where I live, interracial relationships are common wherever black people are LOL.

    • deb

      yeah apart from austin (mainly because there’s such a large white population) interracial dating is not that common in texas. I live in Houston which is super diverse and rarely see interracial couples period.

  • Claire

    “The majority of black men marry outside their race nowadays” ???? Goodbye credibility. The percentage is not even close to half. GTF outta here. smh

  • Princessgunit95

    I’ve been dating a white guy for a little over a year now and I must say that I enjoy it. I love my boyfriend with all of my heart and we’re happy. Don’t get me wrong, it was (and still is) an adjustment. Sometimes we don’t always understand each other, especially when it comes to me speaking in slang or just “Black culturally related things” and vice versa, but one thing iI can say is that he treats me with respect, he is the perfect gentleman and I wouldn’t ask for anyone else. 


    WTF is up with all this black woman self hatred BS being plugged in the media? The myth has already been dispelled…there are actually more black men in college than in prison and there are plenty available black men for black women. The attempt to break and divide us is at full steam because “they” all know that we will be the second largest race next to Latino’s and they will be the minority and would rather have a “mixed” and confused race rather than a strong foundated black race.
    My advice to all black women…share the knowledge and the power you now have to encourage those brotha’s with potential to be the man you need them to be and realize that “cheating” may require a different view by black women..ex: Brothaman pays the bills and puts food on the table and is a hard and responsible worker..spends quality time with the kids..breaks you off whenever you need a lube job..and has a good personality, but you go whacko and throw all the good qualities away because he went out with the boys..had a few drinks..and got laid by a woman he doesn’t love. I have noticed that many black women throw a good man away and now complain that they can’t find a good man just because of a one night stand..SMFH…

    • darkman

      We already are far more than the latinos. The statistic are biased. How come in southern states, the population is majoritarily white when there are black people everywhere in each state?

  • courtney

    One reason white men don’t want to date a black woman is because they don’t want to have dark children…I have heard A LOT of black men say they prefer light skin/ white women especially because they want light skinned children I think there is more of a light skin/ dark skin problem than their is black or white.

    • mika

      That’s ridiculous-I hope men aren’t that superficial when it comes to their own seed.  My husband’s white and the thing that tickles him most about our son’s features is that he has my nose (round and a little puggy) and curly hair (not straight like his of course).  If a man is a good man he’ll love his child no matter what they look like.  If our son came out blue black we’d love him just the same.

  • Oh please. Black women are not INSECURE and that other crap that’s trying to be portrayed here. Black women are simply NOT INTERESTED in dating White men!  White men are just as easy to get as any other men, so take this deceitful story somewhere else.

    • 3whiteman3

      lol If YOU think getting a WHITE MAN is ‘easy’, you’re sadly MISTAKEN! Getting an EDUCATED white man who has a ‘good’ job is ALMOST impossible for a BLACK woman. Sure ‘if’ you’re attractive and find one in a bar who’s had a few drinks in him, he’ll take you home. But good luck trying to get him to introduce you to his family.

      You BLACKS don’t realize just how little MOST white people think of your race. It’s one think for WHITE MEN to be friendly, but it’s ANOTHER for him to actually want to have kids with you! To say otherwise it FALSE PRIDE on your part!

      • LOL. If you’re who you’re trying to present yourself to be, do some research (aka read some respectable history books) and you’ll find out how many wealthy and sober White men (slavemasters and otherwise) raped enslaved women thus impregnating them, so that alone deflates your theory about having kids. And in case you don’t know, based on what I’ve been told, many Black women DON’T want White men as boyfriends or husbands because of the LONG history of the rape and abuse of their ancestors by these White men!!  And most White males know they don’t typically get “the vibe” from Black women – and the ball is usually in the women’s court!  (Ask Heidi Klum – wink, wink!)  Additionally, the majority of Black women – hands-down – would prefer to be with their own!  In fact, getting with a White guy often represents giving up, settling or desperation.  If you are the supremacist you’re trying to paint yourself to be, stop trolling Black sites and having dreams/desires of Black women wanting to marry you.  It ain’t gonna happen – they’re not interested in YOUR kind. Heck, White women probably don’t want you either.  Who can blame them?!?  Lol…Smh…

        • DaisyDooks

          Daaaaaayum!  What else can be said after that?  *High Five, Dap and a Hip Bump*

        • Torontochick

          LOL you’re just as funny, trying to speak for all black women.

          But I agree, what is a white supremacist doing on Madame Noire? Why are white supremacists so obsessed with black people in general? Never did understand that. If you’re a white supremacist, go talk to, amongst, and about white people, not black ones LOL.

      • Torontochick

        LOL you are going to try and speak on behalf of all white people now? That’s just plain funny to me.

        Getting an educated white man who has a good job is actually easier than getting an educated black man who has a good job for black women, and ANY race of women, really. Why? Sheer numbers! In America, Canada, and the UK, there are simply more of them.

  • zina

    I’ll take a brother with no legs over Brad Pitt anyday. Brothers just need to see that we are GEMS….  That’s all….  Don’t buy into this article…  They write these sort of sh!t at the end women’s time of the month when weare emotional… It just reads like emotional manipulation:) 

    • Msddre

      “I’ll take a brother with no legs over Brad Pitt anyway.”

      Not me!

      I’ll take a fine, functioning white man over a gimp negro male any day!

      Ya’ll mammies are insufferable! LOL!!!


    Although this was an interesting article, since when is interviewing 6 people considered “a survey”?? Please tell me that’s a typo! Either that, or say you chatted with a couple of friends or conducted a small focus group.

  • Jeanettegray1

    I am  a black woman,I have been married to a white man  for 13 years.We are now divorcing.This  was a very good read.Alot that was said is true.My husband has never touched my hair.I would never date or marry another white man!!!!!!!!

    • Msddre

      Sounds like a personal problem.

      Your experience is your own and nobody else’s, so move on…

  • DaisyDooks

    NATURE DOES NOT LIE!  Black women do NOT have a natural affinity for white men—or ANY men of other races.  How would we produce BLACK CHILDREN if not with a Black man?  I don’t give a dayum how much publicity and psychological selling goes into spinning the NORMALCY or COMMONALITY of interracial relationships.  Our DNA is encoded to date, mate, marry BLACK MEN to reproduce BLACK PEOPLE!!  That is why the MAJORITY of couples within the ENTIRE Black population in the U.S.–ALONE– is BM/BW–married/unmarried.  In fact, the MAJORITY of couples in other races are same race.  It is FAR more common and normal for men and women to date, mate, marry and reproduce within their OWN race.

    BLACK LOVE WILL NEVER DIE!   Genetically-aware Black women don’t want defective DNA (laced with disorders, animal genes and other strange mutations) from those outside the AfRAkan race.

    • 3whiteman3

      Defective DNA? You mean like in how you BLACKS get sickle cell, high blood pressure, diabetes, smallest brains and iq’s of ALL races, highest highschool drop-out rates, highest STD’s, highest incarceration rates, highest poverty and unemployment rates, etc etc etc

      lol lol The FALSE PRIDE among you BLACKS is STRONG!!!! lol

      • DaisyDooks

        Yes, the DNA of Caucasians IS defective—DEFICIENT. And…you KNOW it. The New England Journal of Medicine has overwhelming evidence–ALONE!! The genetic material of AfRAkan people has been used in patented MEDICINAL THERAPIES and is VERY profitable to the pharmaceutical industry. AfRAkans have absolutely NO USE for your animal genes, but…you NEED our HEALING DNA—to survive.


        • Yes, it is. This “3WhiteMan3” individual should read Harriet Washington’s “Medical Apartheid” for starters to see how our ancestors’ amazing DNA was used (brutally and corruptly!) to discover treatments for the weaker DNA of all others. READ, READ, READ!! We’re tired of the TALK, TALK, TALK w/o the KNOWLEDGE intact.

          • DaisyDooks

            Not only that, SSTR, but medicine science is STILL using HeLa cells (extracted from the cervix of a Black American woman name Henrietta Lacks—without her knowledge or consent).   You must understand that Cro-Magnons like ‘3WhiteMan3’ are NOT known for their ‘brain’ power.  *giggle*

            BNWW, this twerp has NO clue about whom he’s dealing with behind these anonymous screen names.  That Neanderthal-Primate needs an attitude adjustment.

            • Absolutely!  And, of course, “3WhiteMan3” will NEVER pick up any solid historical resources/educators, this individual will just keep riding on what “feels” right – but never what “is” right. Smh…

      • DaisyDooks

        Dear CAUCus-ASIAN,

        Subject: Reminding you of what you know COVERTLY

        Your ANCESTORS did NOT create:

        1. NUMBERS
        2. LANGUAGE ROOT

        Fleece and lies is how you have survived. YOU HAVE AMNESIA. Hence, we have AGREEMENT you are currently on bail.

        DaisyDooks aka 666-Hunter

  • CherieAmore

    No. 7 – Black women don’t see screwing another race as a major accomplishment.

    • DaisyDooks

      Thank YOU!!  *Standing Ovation*

  • Torontochick

    Where is this study/proof? Because if you Google “Black women in the UK now earn more than white women” you can find THAT study. It comes from the UK census.

    And if you Google “Black and Asian women with bachelor’s degrees earn slightly more than similarly educated white women” you will find that USAToday article. Education and an open mind is the key to success and you clearly have neither.

    • Torontochick

      wth? Why did this not appear under the comment I was replying to?

      • DaisyDooks

        It happened to me, too —at another time.  This blogging system is a little quirky.

  • MM82

    I really did not like this article.  It portrays black women as insecure beings that are afraid to date outside our race because we are scared they won’t like us.  The article did not discuss how some black women are just not attracted to white men.  Maybe it could go as far back as slavery time when we were repeatedly raped by white men. This could have something to do with it. Its the same as discussing the lightskin/dark skin issue, it goes all the way back to slavery days. This article should have been further researched.

    • Trolling Human

      Actually it does say that some black women are just not attracted to black men…

  • KIR12

    If American black men (22%) dated and married  white women at the same rate as British black men (50%), American Asian (41.7%) and American Hispanic (41.3%)men , what would you black women do? lol

    The truth is that this is a American BLACK woman problem. Women of other races aren’t complaining because they are marry interracially close to the same percent as their men. U.S. born Hispanic (37.4%) and
    Asian (50.8%) women including British black (30%) women marry interracially.
    While American black (9%) women marry interracially much lower. I must say the article is at least honest although it did initially
    frame it as black men being disloyal “Black men have made it no secret
    their liking to white women”. Yes a lot of black men are attracted to
    white women. Newsflash ALL men are attracted to similar types of women
    including white women with some variances. Stop asking Black American men to be different than
    ALL other men in the industrialized world. It’s not going to happen.
    Black men have absolutely nothing to be ashamed about.

    • Precious

      Yes they do, whites are our enemy. just as the white man
      sought to destroy the black man’s manhood my publicly sleeping with his wife
      making him wait outside as means to say ha i can have you wife whenever i want,
      white women are doing the same thing. This is not love, White women only love
      the unhealthy lust and desperation black men have for them. They also get a
      kick out of the attention and the fact that they think they are hurting black
      women and elevating white supremacy.

  • DarcyR2D

    So all in all Black women are going to end up becoming Lesbians since our options are 0 to none LOL. I say this because as a young black female, I do not fit in any of the stereotypical descriptions of “Black Females”  ex: loud, fat, masculine, and still can’t seem to get a date. One thing I admire about white people is that they stick by each other, you don’t see white men leaving white women in record numbers for Asian females.

    • Dont_Wake_Up_In_Roadside_Ditch

      Actually you kinda of do see White men dating Asian women in record numbers. While they aren’t “leaving” White women, White men in general tend to date outside of their race more so than any other race of male in regards to other races of males. White men date outside more than Indian, Arabic/Middle Eastern, Asian, African, and even Black American males. People really need to stop feeding into stereotypes(not saying that you are, but just in general) and go outside some times. There is a vast amount of interracial couples involving mostly White males. Sad thing is, is that only Black males are scrutinized for it.

    • Dont_Wake_Up_In_Roadside_Ditch

      Actually you kinda of do see White men dating Asian women in record numbers. While they aren’t “leaving” White women, White men in general tend to date outside of their race more so than any other race of male in regards to other races of males. White men date outside more than Indian, Arabic/Middle Eastern, Asian, African, and even Black American males. People really need to stop feeding into stereotypes(not saying that you are, but just in general) and go outside some times. There is a vast amount of interracial couples involving mostly White males. Sad thing is, is that only Black males are scrutinized for it.

    • Dont_Wake_Up_In_Roadside_Ditch

      Actually you kinda of do see White men dating Asian women in record numbers. While they aren’t “leaving” White women, White men in general tend to date outside of their race more so than any other race of male in regards to other races of males. White men date outside more than Indian, Arabic/Middle Eastern, Asian, African, and even Black American males. People really need to stop feeding into stereotypes(not saying that you are, but just in general) and go outside some times. There is a vast amount of interracial couples involving mostly White males. Sad thing is, is that only Black males are scrutinized for it.

      • In general, … NOW I’M JUST SPEAKING GENERALLY, black men are scrutinized because of the choices they make when they step outside the race. THEY OFTEN choose white women that fit the same description as the black women that everyone claims they don’t want anything to do with. You know fat, bitter, and with 2 or more children.SO IT’S KINDA SAD!! But I am for interracial dating if you can find the right person. LOVE & HAPPINESS is all that everyone deserves.

  • Dragongirl

    I believe people can find love in other ethnicities. However just as this article states…black women do not feel that white men “get them” or understand things that are important to our culture. It’s pretty hard trying to explain things to a person all of the time. Black people have an unspoken language. We are no different than any other culture. We get each other. I’ve met alot of handsome white guys who were cool….but were missing that swag or flavor. They were very nice men but something was missing. I’ve been attracted to a Korean man before. He is a nice man and he has alot of swag…hangs around alot of blacks. If you didn’t see him and only heard him speak he sounds black….he’s very influenced by the black culture. I liked him alot….wonder why. I think that it’s still going to take black women a while to explore love with white men. Let us not forget our sordid history with one another. For centuries and generations many black women were raped by white men, plantation owners at any time because we as a people were not looked at as humans but property. This is not easy to erase or forget…it happened. Yes it’s the year 2012…but let’s not forget blacks were still being lynched by white men less than 50 years ago. 

  • Truth?

    I like this list alot but I feel like some of the other aspects have been left out. IN MY OPINION and some of the other blk women I know, we feel as if white men view blk women as something to have like a commodity but not as real relationship material. 

  • Kelly

    The reason why I am so heated is because I am in the UK as this happens. My friends went to lay flowers on the spot where Stephen Lawrence was killed and countless white men drove by shouting racist abuse. Even at a time like this,they just won’t let up.  The police are guarding the shrine from further  attacks and the whites are saying it is a waste of tax payers money and it she be allowed to be destroyed. This does not sound like a race or gender that give a damm about us.  Doreen Lawrence had to take Stephen’s body back to Jamaica because she said the UK does not deserve him ( go on Toronto chick, accuse her of racism too ) and white men said they are going to destroy the grave. 

    • Kelly

      This is reality in the UK in2012

    • Torontochick

      I am very sorry for what happened to your friend. It’s not right! Obviously. It’s a tragedy and as I believe in karma I think those men and women will get what’s coming to them and what they deserve – their day of reckoning. I just don’t believe in seeing hundreds of millions of people as all the same and demonizing all of them. I do not think the answer to hate is more hate. There are horrible white people who do ugly things. Yes, of course I know that. There are horrible black people who do shameful things too, though. And I would not want to be blamed for their actions. So my problem is that I can empathize with the human race. I do not disown my fellow black people for the actions of our very worst. And I also do not hate all white people for the actions of their very worst, either. Anyways, that’s just not how I was raised. I was raised that you take people as individuals first and foremost. I would not stick up for a racist black person OR white person.

      • Kelly

        Can you tell West Indian and Afro American women to stop calling white women becky’s/ as tehy do on this site. Very childish and racist.

      • Kelly

        Bye, I am going out to enjoy London Town. Enjoy your bitter blog rants.  

        • Torontochick

          OK Kelly. Good luck picking up a man. lol.

          • Kelly

            I have a husband, as we Nigerian women do. LOL

            • Torontochick

              There you are, posteuring like you’re better than other black people again. Kelly, you are so sad. I think you should go back to Nigeria with your perfect little husband where you can be better than all black Americans, Haitians, black Canadians, British people, and all the other people you threw under the bus during your mentally ill rant.

              Funny, during all that, the only people you DIDN’T put down are white women. You complimented them. Self-hating much??

            • DaisyDooks

              Awww, hell to the nawww, you can NOT be a Naija woman!!  None of my Naija SSTRS express themselves like you do.  They are highly educated, intelligent and culturally astute—and respectful of ancestors.  Most importantly, they LOVE being BLACK and are proud AfRAkans!!  What is this charade?   O you dey lie!

    • Torontochick

      OK well, this just goes to prove my theory. I think all racism comes from a place of hurt and feelings of rejection. Like whenever I hear of a racist white man I think, “That man got passed over for a black dude and he’s still mad.”

      You’re still mad. You’re still bitter. Not saying you don’t have a right to be. Just that you’d be happier if you let it go.

      • DJTheDJ

        TorontoChick I read this conversation and I must honestly call you a sociopath and a piece of trash. The sh!t I took this morning is worth more than you.

        • Torontochick

          OK well given the fact that I don’t know you and you don’t know me, I will put that up there with the bird poop I walked by on my way to my well-paying job this morning with “Things I Worry About.”

          • Kelly

            You do not know men either that did not stop your tirade.   Grow up, live in the real world and pray for Doreen Lawrence. 

            • Torontochick

              I do not know “men”? As in, all of them? Kelly, serious question: Are you mentally handicapped? The way you talk is like everyone you encounter or read about is the whole damn race or gender or represents the whole country. You must have a -5 IQ or something.

        • Kelly

          Yes she is. She is a pure black girl from Haiti who has a fantasy of having a 3rd parent from Germany to cloud her self hated of not being the ideal in Haiti – light and bright.  

          • Torontochick

            Kelly, you seriously have self-hatred issues you need to address, and I think it’s sad. If we’re talking about ‘issues that plague self-hating black people,” yes, I am considered to be on the lighter end of the spectrum, but still BLACK. You seem to believe that makes me ideal. I never said any such thing. Black is black. Get over your colour complex and stop projecting those issues you have onto me.

  • Kelly

    Do black women and men want madame noir to focus on this white man thing again, or do you want to read about strong black women like Doreen Lawrence and her fight to get the 3  / 4 remaining evil white racist killers in jail , along with the 2 they put away yesterday ? 

  • Kelly

    If this was an Indian boy who got murdered and his mother was tortured by the british government for 18 years and counting, the Indian media will campaign 24 -7 till the British government take action. Look how mad Indians went went Shilpa Shetty was racially abused on Big Brother by Jade Goody. The UK prime Minister had to go to Indian to say sorry. The racist girl, Jade Goody ( who is now dead ) had to fly to India say sorry . The indians in the UK put so much pressure. No way would devote all their energy on why white men do not black women, etc.

    Now is why India is a superpower and we WILL never be. 

    We want to see more women like Doreen Lawrence on the site.

    • Torontochick

      India will be a superpower because it is projected to have the world’s largest population within 20 years.

      You want to be all “black power” move to Africa or the Caribbean and pop out some babies. Otherwise you’re just a bitter, hypocritical, screaming banshee who will die alone on your soapbox. And very annoying, I might add.

      • Kelly

        Well, it better than being a white wanna be like you is is more likely to get jacked by whites, than ever be on their level. Where are your parents from?

        In Canada, you will never have the respect white women get in Canada. Always behind white and Asian women. At least in Africa, I have the respect of my people.   Do Canadians respect blacks? Hell no.   You are bitter than you are not a real canadaian but a nappy headed immigrant ( child of immigrants )  All the rock music can never make you pure like a real canadian like Avril Lavigne.

        • Torontochick

          Which parents? I have three. Two of them were born in Haiti in the 50s and one was born in Germany during world war 2. Why do you ask?

          And you can say what you want about me. It just makes me laugh. Look at you throwing around terms like “nappy-headed” and calling ME self-hating. lol. Girlfriend, you will never get a man with all the issues you have.

          • Kelly

            So you are Haitian. Lot of self hatred there. They love lights and brights out there. No wonder you mad and bitter. 

            • Torontochick

              But boo-boo, you are the one who admitted to being mad and bitter. lol. You are also the one with a colour complex as you said, and I quote, “…because white women have nice hair and eyes.” I said no such thing, actually.

              Actually, my preference is for DARK eyes.

      • Kelly

        We get it, you hate being black.  So what do think Doreen Lawrence should do? Move to africa and be  ” black power ” out in africa?

      • Kelly

        There is a black woman in this world who cries herself to sleep every night for the last 18 years and beyond. And all you can do is insult your fellow blacks that want justice for her and call them names, over white men?  How cruel can you be?  After everything Doreen Lawrence and members of the UK black population is going through….May the lord send you to rot in hell, with the white men ( you crave ) who killed Stephen Lawrence on April 1993.  You are just as bad as the 6 white men – in fact you are worst. Scum.

        • Torontochick

          You are a piece of work. You came on here trolling the hell out of the comment section, arguing with anybody who put a comment that you didn’t like. Someone gives you a piece of their mind and you have the audacity to call them cruel? How are you going to lecture about black unity when you’ve been up in here all day making fun of Haitians, black Canadians, black Americans, black people who are HIV positive, black features, and any black person who is not A) Nigerian or, B) A victim of a crime committed by a white person? You’re not even a CONSISTENT racist hypocrite, you seem to hate other black people just slightly less than you hate all white men LMFAO.

          • TORONTOCHICK, you are a very special person to have even put up with commenting back to this SAD @$$ SOUL!! You are very strong, because as you said he/she is very antagonizing and to be perfectly honest, THEY ARE PROBABLY someone set up to purposely post NEGATIVE comments. THAT’S WHAT IT SEEMS LIKE TO ME!! At ANY RATE, YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON. BECAUSE THIS IGNORANT WASTE OF SPACE DOESN’T DESERVE YOU TIME!

  • Kelly

    It is 2012, in case you have not noticed. You have said the whole date white man thing for over 10 years. We know! They know! Now it is time to address things that REALLY MATTER TO BLack.  There are many women in the USA like Doreen Lawrence who are fighting an evil racist system lead by white men. I doubt how to date white men is high on the agenda if they cannot convict their sons racist killers. Doreen Lawrence may not be American or begging white men on youtube or blogs – BUT SHE IS STILL A BLACK WOMAN. AND she needs our support, because the white community are tired of her, and they are not happy that the white boys got convicted. Only 2 are going to jail 3 ARE STILL FREE TO LIVE THEIR LIVES. THE fight to convict ALL 6 killers is NOT OVER.   WE need to be like asians and fight the UK to put the other men and their parents ( who gave them alibi’s ) IN JAIL.


  • Kelly


    Are you going to act like an Asian  or Arab woman and write about the torture Doreen Lawrence has had to go through for nearly 20 years?  She is a black woman, and this site is suppose to be for black women, right?

    • Torontochick

      The torture? Do you mean like being elected to British Parliament? LOL.

    • Torontochick

      OK sorry I thought you were still talking about Abbott now.

      • Torontochick

        I read your comments before. You cannot even spell and you hate all black people who live in America. You are ridiculous. Please go pick up a book. You are an embarrassment.

        • Kelly

          No, You pick up a book. Read up on a woman who look just like you. She has your lips, skin, nappy kinky hair – even hails from the islands like many black from toronto. Her name is Doreen Lawrence and on April 1993 the UK destroyed her life.   Wish it had been you over her.

          • Torontochick

            Of course you do. You are a very troubled, angry and bitter woman. That is why you wish harm on others. I hope you seek out the psychotherapy you so desperately need and find healing:)

            • Kelly

              I am sure Karma will find you.   Maybe in hell you will finally look German, like your 3rd parent.

              • Torontochick

                You’re so angry and bitter. It’s sad:(

                • Kelly

                  So are you. With your 3rd German parent fantasy. YOU ARE HAITIAN. END OF. 

                  • Torontochick

                    What is your point? I have two Haitian parents (which I said myself) and I was raised since two by a German born person as well. Many people consider their step-parents who raised them since they were babies to also be a parent. Why is that a “fantasy” to you? Oh, that’s right. Because you hate white people so much and are racist, but at the same time are jealous of them for some reason. How could I forget.

                  • Torontochick

                    I also have Korean, Panamanian and Nicaruagan people in my family but they did not actually raise me so I didn’t mention them. Are they a “fantasy” too? lolol

      • Kelly

        STupid dumb idiot. You accuse Dianne of being racist, when you women call white women racist names like becky and they have no arse, etc. 

        • Torontochick

          …Except that I don’t do that?
          I call Dianne racist because of Dianne’s comments. I do not call an entire nationality of people racist, like you do with black Americans and all of the white people in the UK. That’s more of a “Kelly” thing to do. lol.

      • Kelly

        You are stupid and pathetic. I am talking about Doreen Lawrence.  You will never be on the level of white women in Canada. You will always be a West indian immigrant. Go and take your non white features and sit down.

        • Torontochick

          I will do more reading about Doreen Lawrence (I only just saw a brief blurb about it). I think attention should be called to the story. And maybe it should be featured on the site. MN DOES talk about these things but usually only focus on American issues and stories.

          Not sure why you are so obsessed with white women on a site called “Madame Noire.” Do they haunt your dreams or something? That is the fourth time you’ve mentioned them.

      • Kelly

        Canadians are mainly from the islands. So was Doreen Lawrence. She is on of your lot. 

  • Kelly

    Dear MN,

    Now cover the plight of Doreen Lawrence. We cannot live in the cuckoo world that Toronto chick lives in. She thinks all white men worship her as a black woman.  She is abusive ( calling me names and swearing ) and deluded.  If white men worshiped black women. Why did the white men of the United kingdom destroy the life of a black woman for 18years? Doreen Lawrence.

  • Torontochick

    I stand with Shadow Business Secretary Chuka Umunna in saying that Abbott’s comments were completely unacceptable. Furthermore, if the entire British population is as racist and anti-black as Kelly claims, WHY DID THEY ELECT HER TO THE HOUSE IN THE FIRST PLACE?

    • Kelly

      Chuka Umunna mother is a white woman from a rich family and his dad is nigerian. LOL

      • Torontochick

        What is your point?


  • Kelly

    Dear MN,

    LOOK AT THE FACE OF DOREEN LAWRENCE. She is our sister and all you do ( daily and yearly ) is beg the men ( white men ) who wrote letters to her saying her son deserved to be stabbed, kicked and beaten by 5 white men.   No black man would stoop that low and write to the  of mother of a white girls and say she deserved it.   Dooren was trying to lay flowers at the site where her son was killed and white MEN drove by and screamed racist abuse at her and other mourners.       ON the BBC last night, a white old man was son TV and he said that the guilty verdict was a fix because of that N word. He called stephen a N word live on BBC news. A white man said this about a black mothers son.

    Now Diane Abott and being targeted by the British public, The deputy prime minister, the media and other members of parliament. She is being accused as being a racist. They are going in our on this Cambridge educated Jamaican woman.  BY WHITE MEN. 

    STP THIS WHITE MAN THING NOW. A black woman might lose her job in Parliament in the next 24 hours, because white men want to get revenge for the conviction of stephen lawrence. 

    I am watching the BBC news – the WHITE MEN are calling for this sister to be sacked. Even the Prime minister of the UK has being dragged into this.

    Britain’s 1st black FEMALE  MP is being ripped apart by white MEN.

    • Torontochick

      You are an idiot. This post has nothing to do with the racist remarks of an MP. It’s about personal relationships. Stay relevant to the topic or stfu. Please and thank you.

      Furthermore, “A black woman might lose her job in Parliament in the next 24 hours” because as a public representative (especially of a party like Labour, which represents the public interest irrespective of race), she can’t demonstrate racial bias and still get to keep her job! Her comments indicated clear racial bias! She SHOULD be fired!

      • Kelly

        You are an idiot. ( do not call me names ) The very same white men you brag about, insult you – black woman – more than any other gender. So who is the idiot?  YOU.   This should be discussed on a black site.

        • Torontochick

          Hey, Ms. Illiterate: THIS IS NOT THE FORUM FOR YOU TO VENT YOUR ANTI-WHITE HATRED. This is an article about RELATIONSHIPS, NOT politics. I’m a black woman and when you wrote that a black politician was being villified in the press who “did nothing wrong,” I was concerned and looked her up immediately. Then when I read her comments I found them racist& offensive! What the hell do you mean she “did nothing wrong?” Can you even read?

          • Kelly

            Hey Miss Ghetto,

            Black women are the most angry when it comes to white women and white men. So violent, abusive and angry. 

            Now go and read up on Doreen Lawrence. 

            • Torontochick


              I have read up on Doreen Lawrence. And still, I ask you, WHAT IS YOUR POINT? You think because there is racism in the world that the solution to that is… more racism? Where has that gotten you so far? Have you been able to move out of your ghetto and in with a man yet? Doubtful.

              • Kelly

                My point is….. this site should be covering this story. They have been doing this white man begging for years and IT STILL HAS NOT CHANGED THE MINDS OF WHITE MEN.  Ghetto? I live in West London. Not Aids ridden haiti like you. 

                • Torontochick

                  LOL now you are going to put down Haitians too? First you put white women’s looks on a pedestal, then you call black people “nappy-haded,” and now you are insulting other blacks? Just keep piling on the self-hatred and showing your true colours. I love it!!!

              • Kelly

                Talking about a white man is not gonna cure AIDS in your Haiti and make Haitain seen as humans. 

          • Kelly

            She said white people like to divide and rule. Many black of you black Americans say even worse about whites. Even calling white people devils. Pot calling kettle black?

            • Torontochick

              First of all Ms. Illiterate, I think it’s pretty obvious that I’m not an American. I know someone as ignorant and racist as you is not going to be well-travelled but Toronto is in fact in another country – not the US.

              Second of all, even if I WAS American, I would speak for myself, not the whole damn black population of the USA. Are you seriously for real that dumb?

              • Kelly

                I have been to Canada. I have family there. i am Africa, We have family all over the world.  I use to live in the USA. You are the one who is not well travelled and ghetto.  You are illiterate and dumb, but most of all ( lol lol lol You will never be white or have their benefits. Haiti – home of the most aids in the world. HE He

                • Torontochick

                  So? I have been to London. I have been to most of Western Europe, many parts of the Caribbean (going to Jamaica next Friday), been to Africa (Ethiopia and South Africa), next I want to go to Brazil. You can make all the ASSumptions about me that you want to. You’ll still be wrong about every one of them. My friends who are black are privileged because they’re not chained by the anger and bitterness like you are. You will never truly be free until you let it go. Heck, the most privileged friend I have is the black girl who dates black men exclusively I mentioned! She’s loaded!

                  In contrast, if I call you an angry and bitter woman with no man, I am right on the money:)

              • Kelly

                Canadian, Americam UK, French etc. YOU ARE  STLL A BLACK PERSON WITH  A NAPPY HAIR AND FLAT NOSE.

      • Kelly

        You Stfu.  And as white men say, take that chip of your shoulder.

  • Goffegirl86

    Before I say this, I want to be clear that I am black. Isn’t there anything else to talk about??

  • Kelly

    Focus on Doreen Lawrence and Labour MP Dianne Abott  – who is currently being ripped apart by white men and the rest of the British public – even though she has done nothing wrong.

    • Torontochick

      MP Dianne Abott deserves the condemnation she is getting! She made a racist remark! PUBLIC FIGURES WHO MAKE RACIST REMARKS GET CRUCIFIED IN THE PRESS – AS THEY SHOULD. NO ONE GETS A PASS ON THIS. You think her racist remarks should be overlooked because she is black right? That is hypocrisy and nonsense of the highest order! As a black person who is objective, STFU!

      • Kelly

        No you stfu. At least it proves that even educated black women get ripped down just like the BBW.  Google doreen lawrence.

        • Torontochick

          I feel really sorry for you. You are one sad stereotype – bitter black woman who will die alone.

          Can I make a suggestion? Since you hate white people so much, move to Africa or Barbados or somewhere else where there aren’t many of them.

          • Kelly

            I feel sorry for. You will die alone. I am from Africa ( originally ) My men like me. Your men and white men chose you the last, That is why you are reduced to begging. Even when you beg, they still walk past you. So you create a bubble fantasy world.  I do not hate white, But I am also not going to worship them like you. You did, and where did it get you? Another self hating black woman.    Nothing wrong with Africa or Barbados. Even whites live there. Now rot n Canada, where white women rule and blacks have no voice.

            Bitter Canadian woman who is jealous of white women because they have nice hair and nice eyes.

            • Torontochick

              LOL! LOL! LOL!

              This is straight hilarious! I have never been single in my life. I was born here. That makes me a minority in a city where more than 50% of the population was born outside of the country. If you want to live here, you have to be adaptable and have an open mind, as well as an education. Once you have those things, the sky is the limit for you.

              You say “my men like me,” but let me ask you, do you even HAVE a man? I’m guessing no, because if you did, you would talk about him and not in generalities like that. Pretty obvious that YOU are the self-hating one. Why did you mention white women having nice hair and nice eyes? Where did that even COME from? Who is talking about white women here but you? You sound jealous to me LOL.

              • Kelly

                West indian women are colour struck. In Haiti , white looking women rule. You are jealous.    I was born in London, so?   blacks in Canada have no power. HEHHEHHEH 

                • Torontochick

                  Michaelle Jean was the most powerful woman in Canada for a time and she was born in Haiti. But what’s this got to do with the fact that you obviously hate your own colour?

                  You can say what you want about me being self-hating, I would never throw an entire group of black people under the bus like you have. I only give those black individuals a hard time who earned it. You are the self-hating one. lol.

          • Kelly

            Do not try and acts will not slice you up the way they did Stephen Lawrence. White cops in the USA are putting black women in coma’s.

            And you are the stereotype: A bitter black woman who hates her nappy hair an dark skin and wants to be white like britney. It thinks because she is from Canada and listens to rock music, it is an equal to whites – but like Tiger woods. It thinks by attacking black women, it is getting in with white. But thing will end up another single black woman. Of which there are many.

            • Torontochick

              So when I hang out with my black friends, do I want them to be white like Britney, too? You are straight ghetto in your thinking. You want to blame white people for all of your problems. I have friends from all over the world, all races and from all cultures. I have black friends born in Jamaica. I have white friends born in Romania. But OK I’ll admit – my Asian friends were born here. My multiracial friend from Trini does not have a problem with my interests. Why do you? Do you even know me?

              You come here playing the victim card saying, “Oh, poor rich, posh black UK woman, she’s going to lose her job, she did nothing wrong.” But if she had a damn bit of common sense, her job would be intact.

              I don’t feel sorry for her, and by the way, all the black women in my family – the oldest of whom were born in Haiti – are not single. That’s what happens when you’re not a bitter and angry b@!$%!

              • Kelly

                Whatever. We all know Black in Canada struggle the most. Even Asians outperform you. HEHHEHEHHEH

                • Torontochick

                  So you root for black people to fail, huh? Well, that’s not self-hating at all. rofl.

                • reese

                  Asians outperform everyone in the US.

            • reese

              Black people are killing black people at a much higher rates.  Look at the numbers here in US.  The majority of blacks are killed by blacks.  If you take all the blacks killed by cops and hate crimes there are atleast 50 blacks killed by other blacks.  97% of black men murdered are by black men.  So why focus on the less than 3%.  Are did your problack research not include these facts.

      • Kelly

        And what about Doreen Lawrence?> Does she deserve it too? Just because you hate being black, wish you were a white girl with nice hair and obsess after white men who do not give a damm if you live or die, does not mean we must ignore racism against black women like Doreen lawrence.

        • Torontochick

          Racism against black women like Doreen Lawrence should be documented and have its place. But this article is not it, sorry!

          You only came here because it’s a platform people are watching and you know that nobody else will pay attention to your crazy a$$ on your own damn websites, lol.

      • Kelly

        You sick idiot. Take your blonde weave out and blue contacts and READ Doreen Lawrence’s story about what the UK done 1993 to destroy her life forever.

  • Kelly

    Stop talking about white menThey do not care about black women and would not lose sleep if black women die.  Dedicate this site to REAL strong black women like DOREEN LAWRENCE. A Jamaican mother who son was knifed to death by 6 WHITE MEN in 1993, and was fobbed off by the police, the judges, courts, media and ever other part of the power.  She had to fight for 18 years to get PARTIAL justice for her son. 

    • Torontochick

      While that is certainly a horrible, unspeakable act, are you SERIOUSLY implying that the ENTIRE British public is racist because of their [justified] outrage at this comment: 
      ”White people love playing ‘divide & rule.'”?!?!?! If they were so racist, why would they elect her as an MP in the first place?

      And if a white public figure were to make a comment along the lines of “Black people love playing the race card,” which is similar to Dianne’s remarks, you damn well better believe I would find that racist and rip that person apart, metaphorically speaking! SHE DESERVES WHAT SHE IS GETTING!

      • Kelly

        Oh no they will not. Like Luis Suarez and any other white footballer….they will get way with it. Or get off lightly.  Yes, the UK is racist.  I live here.

        • Torontochick

          The entire country of 50 million is racist eh? So why not move to your non-racist utopia?

          As soon as we rid the world of ignorant bitter b!@#$s like you, I can have mine:D lol.

      • Kelly

        And this is revenge of the conviction of Stephen white killers. 

  • really?

    This is pathetic. Why do black women’s blogs always celebrate white men? White men’s magazines like FHM, GQ, Maxim, Esquire and countless others devote ZERO time to celebrating black women. Men’s Health magazine just published the results of its100 sexiest women of all time and the winner was Jennifer Aniston? Do black owmen really believe that white men want anything more than sex? Those white men who want serious relationships AND children with a sister are extremely rare.Please stop the white man worship. It’s sickening.

    • Kelly

      This is what is making cry hot tears. I am from London. We are gripped by a torrid of racism by WHITE MEN.  TW0 top soccer players ( john Terry and Luis Suarez ) have gotten away with racially abusing black players.

      The murder of Stephen Lawrence has made white men angry. They wanted his killers free. Some white men wrote letters to Doreen Lawrence and said her son deserved to die.  Now the white men are calling for black female MP Dianne Abott to resign even though she has done nothing wrong. And all this site ca do is praise them and give us tips on how to date them. 

    • reese

      I don’t think they are.  I think they are saying to broaden their horizans because they are under the belief that black men now only date non black women.  You hear them saying they don’t want us no more and that the majority of black men are married to non black women??????? Wher are they getting this misinformation from I don’t know.

    • Chynadoll

       There are plenty of white men marrying black women…do your homework..I’m with one now..Italina men loooooooves them some black women…once they go black, they never go back doll..look it up

  • Kelly

    Dear MN Editor,

    May I ask you something>?  Why do you always talk about white men?  Because I read every mainstream news outlet from all over the world; not to mention the showbiz blogs and their is not single white man saying anything good about black women – if fact, they do not talk about black women …….unless it is to insult, mock and condemn.      When a black woman wrote a piece on the huffington post ( why there are no black female editors ) white  men jumped on the site and went in hard on black women. It was painful to read. 

    That is why I would like to know why you do it, because the other side ( white men ) are ripping black women apart – even for things we have not done.

    • Kelly

      If we try speak up on lack of black models, vogue editors, top earning leading ladies, etc. It is the very same white men who accuse us of being ‘ bitter ‘, with chips on our shoulders ( the uk’s fave word ) and using the race card.    When I read the huffington post on why black women are not vogue editors, not ONE white men came to our defense – instead, they were ripping us apart and saying  ‘ how many white women are on the front cover of Essence or Jet? Or why is the a BET and NACCP?    And this was echoed when the story was in the UK, and Europe. The same angry white men blaming US.   Then came verbal abuse   –  identical to what that white man in Portugal said to Rihanna FACE.

      That is why I wanna know why you are doing this, because the white men on Daily mail, cnn, Huff post, TMZ are on the ripping us apart.    In the UK, white men saying that  siding against a black mother ( Google Doreen Lawrence, mother of murdered black teenager, Stephen ) with the 5 WHITE MEN who took his life and remained free for 18 YEARS.   

      The racist abuse that white men direct at black women is being supplied by this very website. 

      As we say in the UK, stop bigging the up, because they are NOT bigging us up in anyway, shape or form.

      • Kelly

        I am from the UK. I am depressed because the UK is being gripped by a wave or  racist. White men wrote to Doreen lawrence and said her son deserved to be murdered and that she should go back to Jamaica.   Her son memorial has been damaged several times and when mourners went to put flowers on his stone, WHITE MEN drove buy and racially abused mourners.   I came to this site for some racial confidence, and all I see is YOU trying to school us on how to date white men.

        Why did you not cover THE plight OF A BLACK WOMAN: Doreen Lawrence. ?

      • Torontochick

        Black people make up 5% of the UK population. They did a study and found that they are actually OVER-represented in British media relative to their actual population size. Just lol!! Bet you self-pitying whiners weren’t expecting THAT result, were you?

        If anything, the British media needs more Arabs and Muslims since THEY are the biggest minority in the UK.

        If they do not put black faces on the cover of British fashion mags and you want to see them, that is why we have outlets like MN. OUR OWN MEDIA. This is not racism. This is common sense. You hate white people and yet yearn for their approval so desperately that you cry if your black face ain’t on the cover of “Vogue”? Get a grip, weirdo!

      • Shiron

        Great points!

  • Kelly

    No wonder people in the UK and the USA racially abuse blacks and celebrate their murders.   With the whole Stephen Lawrence case in the UK causing anger in UK and constant silent race war in the USA –  not to mention racist murders in Europe……all black american women can talk about is how to date white men?        White men ( on the whole ) only want YOU, if you can give them a white kid.  Black women cannot make aryan kids. Even some Asian women can make eurasians who came out pure white like Alexa Chung.  That will always be the deal breaker for white men. 

  • Grace

    I definitely don’t agree with this article. I’m a black woman who is engaged to a white man, and he loves my ethic features, hair, complexion, etc. He wouldn’t have me any other way. Most of my black girlfriends are highly educated w/ masters degrees carrying stable careers. Black women ARE desirable to white men, and if black women hold negative assumptions of why a white man won’t date us, we’ll never broaden our dating pool.

    • Kelly

      Not all black women would be seen as desirable, hence white men still marrying white and asian women more. That is not racist. They just want kids who are caucasian. That is the real reason. White men are not like white women, they do not get turned on by having mixed race kids. 

    • Kelly

      You cannot speak for white men like that. If you were right. Why is the UK going through a torrid of racial disunity?  Some black women get lucky, others do not, for every black woman you KNOW or Naomi Campbell there are millions who are not with white men, and never will be. 

      • Torontochick

        OK but YOU cannot speak for white men either. You are saying that all white men are as disgusting as BNP’ers, and that’s not fair.

    • Kelly

      As Diana Ross white men have proved, just because you are with him, does not mean he is exclusive to ONLY black women. Simon Cowell date a black woman……..and many white; plus and Indian; eurasian and a muslim woman too.

      • Torontochick

        So what is your point?

        • reese

          I don’t get her point either.  You can fall for a guy who dates variety of women.  I was the first black women my husband dated and he was my first native.

      • Msddre

        1. Gene Simmons wanted to marry Diana, but she refused.

        2. Simon Cowell is still engaged and not married.

        3. You’re jealous of black women. 

  • Who writes these articles? Seriously? Why is it every time I come to this site there’s always an article about what black women/men should and shouldn’t do, what they will/won’t do, why they can/can’t do it… Stop doing this to us! Stop limiting us and stop trying to control what we do! While, the statements in this article may be true for some, it’s not for all… So just stop it! Thank you.

  • Torontochick

    The incidence of black women/white men marriages has increased by well over 50% in a decade alone. I think the implication that black women don’t “want” white men is made a little ludicrous by that fact alone. Many of us do.

  • severine

    dumb article.

    But I love the first pic, the woman’s hair is amazing! What a lovely texture….:-)

  • severine

    This article is stupid. The author is pushing her own agenda on Black women. Whatever…

    But, I had to post because the first pic on this article, the one showing the back of the black woman’s head, is fierce! I love her fro, the texture is to die for and I want to put my hands in it!!!

  • Kelly

    Look, The UK is being swamped with a torrid of violent racism. From the Soccer players like John Terry and Luis Suarez; The murder of stephen lawrence; UK xfactor singers calling people racist names; black xfactor uk singers being ripped a apart by the UK; black politician, Diane Abott being racially lynched by the uk population…..we do not need this. When will you get it? White men ( on the whole, and the average ) DO NOT want black women, nor care about the black race.

    You also forgot another reason why white men do nt date black women……white men do NOT white black kids.

    • Msddre

      yes they do…you’re just mad because it’s true.

      gawd, you’re pitiful.

  • Lady

    Look, The UK is being swamped with a torrid of violent racism. From the Soccer players like John Terry and Luis Suarez; The murder of stephen lawrence; UK xfactor singers calling people racist names; black xfactor uk singers being ripped a apart by the UK; black politician, Diane Abott being racially lynched by the uk population…..we do not need this. When will you get it? White men ( on the whole, and the average ) DO NOT want black women, nor care about the black race.

    You also forgot another reason why white men do nt date black women……white men do NOT white black kids.

  • Christopher Russell

    I’m attracted to many black women, but first I want to hear them speak.  If they have good language skills, I don’t care if they have “African American English”, so long as it’s spoken intelligently, like many do at the university.  But when they start with that talk and absurd ideas, my interest in them disappears as I could never imagine myself with them.  Ironically, for example, how could you have handed in this as finished: “…but the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race.”  First of all it’s “nowadays”, not “now and days”, which doesn’t even make any sense.  How could you have thought “now and days” was correct?  Second, on what basis do you make this claim?  “The majority of black males marry outside their race”?  Don’t you feel obligated to back that up with some citation or specific statistic?  Do you feel that you can make such statements as this just based on some impression you had?  Is that even true, or do you even care if the things you say are true?  I’ve dated black women, but not ones who talk like you.

  • I am a 27 years old doctor,mature and beautiful. and now i am seeking a good man who can give me real love, so i got a sername Andromeda2002 on  Agedate.СòM, a nice and free place for younger women and older men,or older women and younger men, to interact with each other.Maybe you wanna check out or tell your friends.

  • desparetly seeking shananay

    I also seen the ir site where they go out of their way to hook up these white dufffis w/ desparete BW but the funniest part is editor leaving a caption saying “I never met him so if he comes & kills you I have nothing to do with it”. WTF???

  • desparetly seeking shananay

    BW please stop these desparate attempts @ tryn to make WM holla @ u. All you’re doing is just boosting their egos. Now they know that they can get a BW anytime they want, by reading this article. Throughout history the conquering race via colonialism always mate with the native “women” to spread their seed. While the native men stood by &watched. Women are spoils in a race war stop attacking your men for tryn to dominate and spread the black seed which is the human race you think WW are made @ their husbands for screwing BW behind close doors or during slavery….black love will never die!

    • reese

      Do you really believe that there are no black women aren’t attracted to white men or turn them down?


    wow Black people are pathetic, this is what you guys talk about on regular? No wonder you are the scum of the Earth and can not change your outcome. to busy playing POP Culture trivia. Idiots. 

    • Guest

      If that’s how you feel, 1. YOU are the Jackass, and 2. Why are you even on this site? You need to go to sites where your fellow Trashmates discuss issues to which you can better relate, such as ignorantly criticizing everyone because you fail to know &/or understand them, and having sex with your own kin.

    • reese

      What is your nationality I wonder because black people have came up big time.  You haven’t notice the black president.  The richest woman in the world is black.  What other minority can claim that.  We have made more strides than any other group from slavery to president in that time span.  And this isn’t all we talk about.  What do you do I wonder.  I bet you are no CEO.  People who say things like you have no accomplishments of your own and that is why you try to stick to the accomplishments of your race.

      • Zulu Queen Anita

        We had 8 black presidents before George Washington , Obama Is the 9th black president look up John Hanson he was the 1st , Hannibal was vice black president & there r several black Billionaires they just don’t want us to know way more wealthier then Oprah !

  • FromUR2UB

    Even though we know that white men have historically lusted after black women, I don’t think most of them are trying to make it a public thing.  Before those of you who are married to or date white men get into a tizzy, I just mean that it’s rare to see white men married to black women.  Frankly, I think it hurts white people professionally and socially when they display an attraction for blacks, even in acting roles.  Remember how popular Kevin Costner was before he did, ‘The Bodyguard’?  Afterward, it seems he fell off the “hunk pedestal” and the roles dried up.  It’s almost like they’re punished for it.  The assumption seems to be that white men are lining up outside black women’s homes, but she just won’t open the door.  But, how willing are most to risk everything, possibly their livelihoods, to be with black women?
    Let’s not also forget that for some black women, their ideal man is a black one.  What’s wrong with that?  Even if it not about a physical attraction, it’s hard enough to get men of the same race to understand women.  Who wants to have to compound that with trying to get a man of another race to get who you are as person, and then, understand how you were molded by race history and other factors that are likely foreign to him?  I don’t care how evolved people are, those differences in culture, background, even grooming techniques, are going to confront them sooner or later.   

  • wemawr

    This constant push to have black women date white men really needs to stop because it’s nothing but destructive towards the black family. Here’s the problem and it’s something mentioned in this very article – white men enjoy many privileges in this society. They grow up in safe neighborhoods, have access to better schools, their families are better off, they have an easier time getting jobs, etc., and they’re often at an advantage socio-economically to black men who usually don’t enjoy these benefits. What tends to happen is white men can better afford to be choosy. In other words, if they want to go after sisters, they’re in a better position to go after the cream of the crop when it comes to sisters. I know people seem to see and talk about black male and white female relationships but if you look at a number of couples, you will invariably notice that the white female in these relationships is usually of a less socio-economic standing than the black male. In other words, while white men get the best of the black females, black men are getting the left-overs, to put it mildly. I won’t name names but a brief survey of celebrity black-white inter-racial couple easily confirms this trend.
    As a successful, Ivy League educated black man, I can’t tell you how many times I personally and peers like myself have been rejected by attractive, successful, well-educated black women in favor of white men. Sure, we men don’t generate tons of articles about these sorts of things happening, but believe me, it happens far more often than you think. And I can’t tell you how heart-breaking, humiliating and demoralizing it is to have worked hard and made many sacrifices partially in order to make oneself “eligible” to sisters only to face rejection, particularly in light of all the rhetoric about “not enough available black men”. This sort of rejection can be so painful that it in fact drives some brothers into dating white women – “why should I put up with being dumped by my own kind?”Again folks, let’s not lose sight of the historical context of how we’ve gotten to this situation where there aren’t enough “eligible black males”. It is not an accident. And when we ignore the “cause” and only focus on the “effect” and myopically focus on “solutions” based only on the effect, we exacerbate the problem. Clearly, we need more eligible black men out there for our sisters, and we as a community need to work together to make that happen. For starters, we need to encourage more respect for black women among black men by removing and no longer tolerating the condescending treatment of black women in our music and culture – shut down urban radio if we have to to get the point across that broadcasting garbage harms our people. The “pimp”, “gangster”, “playah” culture needs to be firmly condemned and discouraged and in a time of high incarceration rates and deadly STDs, there’s all the justification in the world to pursue this strategy. We need to celebrate and value academic achievement and professional growth in areas other than sports and entertainment. Sisters can help us “good” brothers out by not catering to the idiots. Look at a brother’s character and not what’s in his wallet.Pushing black women to date white men is only going to build further animosity between black men and black women and we all lose as a consequence. Please, unless we have veritably exhausted the supply of eligible black men in this country, please do not encourage this black women/white men trend. It’s extremely hurtful and worst impacts the very brothers that our community needs to see more of, brothers who love, respect and admire our beautiful black sisters. Ever notice how “The Bachelor” is always a white guy, yet there’s usually a sister or two in the mix he gets to choose from? What message do you think that sends? Now consider the shows where the black guy is the bachelor and look at the quality of white women that he gets to choose from. Markedly lower. Let’s THINK about consequences before we pursue “easy” solutions that do more harm than good. 

    • HonestyIsTheBestPolicy

      That was a good read….I couldn’t have said it better

    • Torontochick

      One of my best friends is a black female. We’re both attractive and intelligent (I’m a few years younger), but she is even more successful and well-educated than I am. And arguably prettier – I may be thinner but she has an absolutely stunning face. Her preference is exclusively black men – in fact she is currently living in a gorgeous loft with a Dominican-born black man. My preference is exclusively white men. It’s not personal and it’s not a rejection. We can support one another as friends and as fellow black people without having to date the exact same type. Incidentally, we both like musicians: I like rock musicians, her boyfriend is an urban/classical musician (yes, he fuses the two, lol).

      I think people need to stop taking strangers’ relationships and partner selections to heart or as a personal rejection. It’s not. I have nothing against black men. In fact, I am more than willing to befriend them. I’m just not into them in a romantic sense, which is to say since I am taken, now goes for white men I happen to meet as well.

      • Kelly

        As a black woman, If you exclusively prefer white men, you will limit your dating pool dramatically. Her is white:  You are black and racism is still alive.  To find a white man who ONLY wants to be with black women – on her terms ( dark skin, curvy body, natural hair ) is impossible. You are more likely to meet a black man ( maybe not those  usa ones ) but a black man, than a white man who wants black women. So to ONLY prefer white men….is why many black women are alone. How many white men ONLY prefer black women?     Even Halle and Naomi white men still date white chicks. 

        • reese

          Why do they have to exclusively like black women.  If you limited yourself to black men who only date black women your pool would be just as low.  There are so many single black women who overwelmingly date only black men.  Some women are approached more by non black men like Whoopi Goldberg who said no black men were knocking at her door. 

        • Torontochick

          That is complete and utter nonsense. You say you live in London, correct? So you mean to say that to “only prefer the group that constitutes the vast majority of the population” is the reason that many black women are alone? Are you serious? And keeping in mind that the majority of black women do NOT in fact even prefer the group that comprises the vast majority? Pure rubbish.

        • Torontochick

          I also have to wonder why you need to find a man of ANY race who ONLY dates black women? That was not a criteria of mine prior to meeting my commonlaw partner.

        • ria0991

          That’s bs. She will meet a black man who will leave her, use her and leave her with a child. No a lot of black women are alone because they re looking for the MYTHICAL GOOD BLACK MAN!! THAT BLACK MAN DIED OUT IN THE 60’s after the 60’s black men starting getting with, impregnating, and leaving white women from left to right. Different womem same game.

      • wemawr

        I’m curious- so what is it about black men that makes you not into them in a romantic sense?

        • Torontochick

          It’s just a physical preference. I like men who have a certain profile that is not that common among black men… some have it, like Marvin Humes or Blair Underwood, but just not in general.

          My friend dates black men exclusively also because of a physical preference. She has a thing for men with full, “juicy lips” she calls them.

          To each their own. We don’t put each other down for what we like.

    • Shiron

      You made some excellent points in your post, also this is one of the best posts I’ve read in a long, long time—I too feel that encouraging black women to date and marry out unless it is absolutley necessary, is only going to take a bad situation and make it worse, simply because we are not dealing with the problems in our community and trying to heal our relationships.  In my heart of hearts, I don’t have a problem with interracial relationships within reason. However, I do feel that we are trying to intermix with other races of people way, way, way too much.  If we are not careful, I am afraid we are going to go the way of the American Indian who in 2012 can scarecely be seen or is seldom represented in the mainstream of our American society. The few that still exist ( in my native state of Oklahoma) have intemarried with whites to such an extent that you can’t even tell that they are Native anymore–They look more caucasian than Indian. The few who have managed to retain some degree of their ethnic features or identity are segregated and living somewhere on a reservation, mostly removed from society.  With us being only 12-13% of the population, I just feel again that we cannot afford mix with whites to such a great extent.

    • reese

      I don’t understand the type of women the men and women get have to do with anything.  If you look at the statistics black women are also marrying up.  So why should the fact that black men will accept anything prevent black women from dating somebody of another race.  But I agree with everything else you said.

    • April

      I agree with you on your point of view about the negative impact of the media on society’s culture. But I disagree on your point of view when it comes to interracial dating. I do not think that interracial dating should be encouraged or discouraged. I don’t think people should pick their mate based on racial pressures.I feel that people should find a mate that they can click with. When you used the terms “cream of the crop” and “leftovers” it made me think that you seen women as a status symbol or an object. I do not walk in your shoes.I do not understand your hardships. I am white. And I believe that society has a long road ahead until every person is actually considered equal.


      The white man has all the jobs,and all the black women he can get! Before back in the day ,a black woman didn’t have access to white men.A whiteman will hire a black woman over a black man any day. We used to watch the black news anchors, back in the day,they were fine and were married to white guys. Black-men need to unite,and volunteer and help educate those that don’t have degrees. But the conspiracy was to bring drugs in the Blk neighborhood during the 70s.

  • Htwn5440

    DO NOT BELIEVE THIS ISH….. IN THE U.S ESPECIALLY IN THE SOUTH BLACK WOME ARE MARRYING AND DATING WHITE MEN LEFT AND RIGHT. This is the Media trying to PSYCH you out. Just like when you get a new car and then it seems like every where you look someones driving the same car. But you didn”t notice it until you got the car. REBUKE THE RACIAL DIVISON IT’S GETTING OLD. THERE’S NO WAY TO TELL WHO’S NOT DATING WHO! IT’S ALL GOSSIP

    • Kelly

      But the stats say it is very low.  Your left right statement is not factual.

    • Kelly

      Google diane abott and Doreen lawrence. That will show you about racial divide.

  • Torontochick

    In Canada there isn’t this weird hang-up about these relationships, it’s very commonplace. In fact I’d say for Canadian-born black women, over half date outside of their race (which isn’t limited to white men of course).

  • Artchicky

    Right,You got it right the first time…..they do not go out with them because they are NOT asked.

  • This article is just full of inaccuracies. Quiet as it’s kept white men they luv black women!  They just aren’t like the brotha’s who will date anything white that’s a female, regardless of what she looks like, behavior, income.  You hardly ever see a white guy with a black woman who isn’t all that.  I think if you are going to cross the racial divide go for the best of the best.  I have dated whites but, I’m very selective about it.

  • Hollywoodqueen_2000

    Ok, maybe its just different in LA, because here, most black men don’t date black girls, and a lot of white guys, especially Jewish and Italian will openly try to date us.

    • Torontochick

      Also different in Toronto:)

      • Kelly

        They use to say that about the UK. Not anymore they do not.  Black women in the UK were voted the women, society is least likely to forget. 

  • Hollywoodqueen_2000

    What??? Ohmygosh, there are lot of educated black women who do well for themselves.  Like a lot!

  • MRSW

    First – only a BLACK WOMAN can tell you why we don’t date white men…let me give you the real 5 reasons:  1 – we don’t want them – its not a hate thing – just don’t want one like I don’t want to drive a Kia, 2 – most are not attractive to us – there are a few exceptions, but really, have you looked at the lips and skin and structure of a black man, 3 – we love black men – our heritage is from strong black men – our grandfathers, uncles, cousins and dads worked and fought for us – making us proud of them in the process, 4 – we want black babies -inter-racial kids are always confused , 5 we want to support the legacy of black family love.

    • Miriam

      You don’t represent or speak for the rest of us, so STOP IT!

  • Hollywoodqueen_2000

    What study was this? Im thick and I get way more attention from white guys than from black guys.

  • Love_Sexy

    I see another silly article about BW/WM dating…….Date/love who you want because its up to the individual preference whether they choose a man in/outside of their race…..Date for all the right reasons meaning looking at the character and what they have to offer inside….Do they have substance?…Why does this have to be a big issue MN every month?

  • Babeegurl

    OMG…this story was pure awful. Most black men date and marry outside of their race?! Where are you getting your information?

    There was a study months ago that said the majority of black men still date and marry black women. You guys even reported on it!

    And white guys just don’t approach us? That’s BS. I have dated all different races of men, but the majority of them are white. Wanna know why? They manned up and approached me with respect like they have some damn sense, and I’m a thicker girl.

    The only valid reason is no. 5! 

  • Iguessso

    It’s alot in this article I just don’t agree with.  I’m not saying it’s not true, but it’s not entirely true.  I have been approached by both black and white men, and I myself have witness a number of white men pairs up with women who were dark skin and wore their hair natural.  So to say all have an issue with the way black women look is not true.  Alot of the things listed in this article is superficial.  There are some white men who would go deeper than the physical to get to know the personality and enjoy what they see.  I DO notice that when a black woman goes out with a black man she does get more flack for it than a black man with a white woman.  I guess we were suppose to wait around for them…I think not.  If you’re not attracted to white men that’s fine, do with what you’re attracted to.  But don’t make up these superficial reasons for why black women and white men relationships can’t work because it has and it is.

  • Folakeb

    I’m not sure if this is accurate. I am an African American( not black american, I am a first generation Nigerian American) woman and I get approached by ALL kinds of guys from Asian to Indian to black, to white, hispanics, ect. I don’t think I can relate to what some of you are experiencing. Could it be that I am an open minded individual? There’s a possibility? For all I know it could be my personality ( i’m a warm hearted individual and that’s the vibe I give off which probably makes me approachable). Some guys dumb excuses for not dating a black woman , is “Black woman are always rude.” Well I’M SORRY, as 1999 that excuse is spoiled! SO I encourage all of you ladies to date who ever you want, gain some confidence if that’s the case. It’s crazy to me how many beautiful black single woman I see because they want to stay in their race. No need to get awkward if your dating outside of your race, I feel like it keeps the chemistry there because there is always something new you will learn about  each other (especially if you come from different back rounds) that will keep you intrigued! 

    • reese

      Girl alot of us have the same experiences you do.  My husband is native and they only talked to all of six women.

  • MIA

    White men have no hang ups about black women, if anything they are just sly with their attraction. Unlike Black men who will gladly throw black women under a bus for any ethnicity. White men will never EVER put their white women down, even if he is sleeping with a 11:50 pm black woman.

    I do not date white men just because I’m not attracted to them. There is nothing more beautiful to me than a strong black man who takes care of business and treats a black woman like a Queen. And I do not see this short supply of good black men out there. I meet them all the time.

    Hell I’ve had 15 black, really GOOD HUSBANDS, and two of them were mine! LOL, I’m just joking!!

  • Msmykimoto2u

    And those banners at the bottom of the screens are really getting on my nerves lol

  • Msmykimoto2u

    While I am not opposed to dating a white man (beacause ive dated 2), i think one of the problems i think some black women, including myself, is the white man not being able to relate to our lifestyle,culture, and background. And not to mention that we do have to work twice as hard to be where they are and they just wont fully understand that or why we choose to put an abbreviation of our names on our resumes out of fear of rejection or being pre-judged. Its jsut less complicated dating a black man but by no means should i say you shouldnt give the white boys a go

  • Reita501

    This is one of the reasons black women look to their own for love. We love our black skin,our black understanding,our black language ,overall our black comfort with one another without having to EXPLAIN!! We won’t transform for our men because he wants us to be acceptable to his “cubicle friends”

  • Kenya

    Wow! These comments are so unnecessary. The author obviously wrote this article based on her own personal experiences. So why is everyone bent out of shape about what the “author” who is one person has to say about “Why black women dont date white men.” If what she says doenst apply to you then keep it moving & that is all. We all hae out preferences of what we like and what we dont like, and she just stated what she dowsnt like.

    • Kenya

      Excuse the typos !!!… I was typing so fast.

    • Torontochick

      She is attempting to speak for all black women though.

  • Df3dkjl2y

    My friend just met a chocolate man on Blackwhitemeet.COMit’s where for men and women looking for interracial’ship for a fabulous lifestyle
    It’s a nice place for black white sing’les, to interact with each other…no bounds or extremes in front of true love.

  • MixedUpInVegas

    I must be the only one who did not interpret this article to say that black women should date white men.  I did come away thinking there are plenty of reasons why black women might be reluctant to do so, though.  What surprises me is how angry so many people became upon reading this article, to the point of calling one another out and demanding some declaration of racial qualification to speak on the matter.

    Since none of us can, or should, control the love lives of others, why all the excitement?  I agree that the article was shallow and written on the fly, but it doesn’t merit all this hollering!  Everyone should date whomever they like and marry whomever they love.  Finding a life partner with whom to share the travails and joys of life is hard enough; if someone manages to find that partner, who is to say anything except congratulations?

  • In All Honesty

    Black women are looking more desperate by the day, it seems. Most White men don’t date Black women because they don’t have to. I don’t have to either, so I don’t. It’s that simple.

    • Zeze

      Who are you? A black man? Well let me just say if I were a wite woman, there is no way I would ever be with a black man.

    • Kelly

      And most white men are just racist. End of. 

    • reese

      But should we be offended because my feeling is most black women wouldn’t date you either.  Everyone has a preference.

    • Shiron

      Be careful about what you put out in the universe because it will work it’s way back to you eventually!  There’s no need for the arrogance.

    • Or maybe its because ‘YOU’ are just not the type of White man that peaks a black woman’s interests.

  • KikuyuDread

    We are naturally attracted to black men but the majority of black men now and days marry outside of their race.”

    Bull$hit! Show me a study that has hard facts proving that the majority of black men marry non-black women. Go ahead…I’ll wait…

    Oh? You can’t do it, can you? That’s because IT’S NOT TRUE. MadameNoire – I’ve been reading your website for a few weeks and while many of the articles are ignorant with no type of research, this comment takes the cake. You’ve just lost a reader. 

  • ClassyInHtown

    Why are people afraid to talk about sex? Most black women don’t date white men because we’re used to the sexual satisfaction that a large penis brings us.  A lot of us are just not willing to take a chance with a white man.  When you’re used to steak, it’s hard to get used to chuck roast hamburger patties.

    Get real MN writer!  In my case, I’m approached by men of other races more often than I’m approached by BM.  I was approached by a dude with an Aryan Brotherhood tattoo on his arm a few weeks ago.  I asked him if he was crazy and if he thought I was crazy enough to date a white man who hates black people. 

    He said 95% of white racist men would give up their pensions for a black woman.  Black men make them feel sexually inferior and they feel empowered when a black women chooses to be with them.  It’s the same feeling that black men get when they’re with white women……a sense of accomplishment. 

    Whatever dude…thanks for the knowledge, but it ain’t my cup of tea…lol

  • Guest

    Truth is most white men have daddy’s that have told them about how black women, are ruining their own black mens’ lives, so don’t get involved with a black woman.

    White men believe in being in control, while black woman want to be in control of the relationship. Two cooks in one kitchen, mentality. Not gonna work out. White men really don’t want black women to start. They want anything but a black woman.

  • smh

    whoever wrote this is a fckn idiot..race shouldnt matter when it comes to love

  • Believe it or not PEOPLE.. there are more black men that marry black women then those who marry outside of there race… The media is trying to “white wash” us to dilute our race to nothing.  The media will showcase interracial marriages between actors and athletics before they would those who marry within their race.  It’s a reason for that.. Just look at the statistics or better yet google the actors and athletics with black wives, they’re more.  Now what media is trying to do is work on the Black women, promoting this “black women need to start dating outside of their race” thing.  Now what we’re going to start seeing on tv is more black female actresses with white men to make it seem like there are an abundance of black women dating outside of their race.  Don’t fall for it… keep looking for that good black man, trust me their out there… I have one and all of my friends have one too (black man married to a black woman).

  • Moneywithcents

    BS, this is suppose to be Madame Noire speaking for us but your treating us like we’re part of the problem.  These articles make me sick to my stomach…if you don’t want to go there you shouldn’t feel like something is wrong with you if you don’t want to.  The idea of these “studies” is probably fabricated, bending the truth.  Moving on, it’s 2012..If you want to hold out for someone who looks like you because that’s what you find esthetically pleasing, then rock out.

  • Georgina

    I just went thru this list and I want to talk about reason #4. White men tend to date asian women because asian women buy them!! Asian women promise these white men things and a certain life. White men are not into asian women more than any other women. Asian women are the ones chasing these men down. Black women we demand a lot from the men we date. I have friends that that tell men they have to prrof themselves worthy enough to date. These guys then go out and buy expensive gifts for my friends. I do not make that demand on the men I date but one thing is for certain I will NOT buy a man. I will not promise a man a lifestyle just so I can say I am with a white man. Asian women on the other hand…lol.

  • Guest

    This article is insulting to both black men and women.

  • Guest

    The majority of black men do not marry non-black women.  What a lie.  The majority of black men marry black women.  Way to promote lies and propaganda.

  • Jayroock124

    Its stupid articles like this that have womens heads messed up. This is a terrible site.

  • Dragon2012

    Honestly, I don’t want white men….not racist…just don’t..Sorry fellas.

  • ???

    #6 A patriarchal societal structure.

    And this comment will be deleted in 5,4,3,2…

  • Ummm…

    I don’t date white men because of their package is pink…it reminds me of raw meat and I can’t get pass that. All the rest of this crap does not apply…well for me.

  • TJ

    I’m not buying that you are Caribbean. I think you were reading comments then decided to posts.

    That still makes you another dumba$$ in the thread. I don’t talk about a group of people, neither do I generalize them. I could spend hours talking about black Caribbeans and your skin whitening, living in squalor, your color complex, or how badly you all want to live in America to get away from your shyt hole you call home or the Jamaican Food Stamp Program that was created to fix the poverty in Jamaica. But, I won’t go there.  

    • TJ

      Exactly. Run along troll. I’m still not buying that you are Caribbean. Probably a regular. 

    • jusayin


  • OB1 Klip OOZEE!!

    Generations ago it was Rape, today concensual.

  • Younggentleman1

    These articles do such a disservice to black people especially black women. They make it seem as if white people are the end all be all and it just not true. Black women and men do not be swayed into thinking they are better than you. They do not make you. These articles are trying to play in to people’s insecurities. The truth is most people date or marry into their own ethnicity. It’s not racist it’s just they can identify better with each other. They use the same interracial celebrities over and over to make it seem like black people can’t get along together and don’t want each other. Notice they never do stories on all the black celebrities and athletes that have fine black women behind them. That’s to much like right and boring. So they set the scene and get it into your head that we don’t need each other. That is so far from the truth. The powers that be want to keep us separated and to do that they get rid of the man take his woman and reproduce. Don’t fall for it. All they pump is negative images of us through out the world. Everything that you were born with they made fun of only to come back and reproduce it in a lab. Now its popular. They created racism. They taught the world to hate us and now they teach us to hate us and side with them only to still be seen as a second class citizen. Wake up. We are the best we make black kings and queens. I love black people forever. Let’s love our selves better.

    • Torontochick

      I agree with you, I am tired of seeing my relationship sensationalized in this way. I wish they would just stop with these articles on MN.

      But having said that, I’ll be damned if I’m going to let an insinuation fly that I “don’t want” or “wouldn’t date” a guy like my boyfriend without challenging it. So it’s a lose-lose situation.

  • John

    What do you think about the Jamaican rapper who turned himself almost white or Sammy Sosa turning himself almost white. 

    Don’t you all speak English in the Caribbean. Why is your spelling and grammar so atrocious? 

    • John

      You are the one in here talking about us. I’m just pointing out that Caribbeans have problems that you seem to not have ever heard of. 

      If I’m an black person trying to be white speaking English, what does it say about your comment, which is written in English, even if it does have spelling errors and a host of grammatical errors? 

      ” trying to be black when the majority of your culture are really white trap in blac people body because your trying to blend back your skin color sleeping with a black woman since not allm of them were raped but the majority of them.”

      This must have been written in the language Caribbean Stupid because I don’t understand one bit of it. If you are going to write in English, annunciate and spell your words correctly.  

      • John

        The n-word did exist in Africa. I’ll paste a from the net about the original meaning of the word: >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 

        “The word “ni g…” used to be the most revered and sacred word in the universe. It was the “devine epithet,” and the people who began using the mother of all words that originated from this word which was sullied by the British, were the ancient Egyptians or better, the Khemites, who called their land, “Khemet” or “The Black Land,” and also used the name, “Ta-merri” or “The Beloved Land.””

        “In the translation of ancient Egyptian and Hebrew (which is heavily influenced by Egyptian), one will not always find vowels, therefore, very few people will realize that the word for God, which is “N-g-r” pronounced “en-ger” was the Egyptian word for God. In fact, the Egyptian word for “nature,” is also the word used for God. That word is “ntyr,” (pronounced net-jer.” Now prounce the word “ni gg..” and the word “net-jer,” and one sees the clear connection.”

        “The Romans are probably the first Europeans to misrepresent the word for God, which was “N-g-r” About the early part of the First Century, Romans tried to invade Ethiopia.”

        “In ancient times, Blacks were worshipped as Gods. The Gods of Greece came from Egypt. The worship of the Black Madonna is connected with the worship of Isis, the Egyptian Goddes. Moreover, Blacks in Egypt called their Pharaohs “En-ger” or “N-g-r” he was literally referred to as “THE GOD.”

        • John

          “A Roman general invading Nubia from Egypt would probably have used the Egyptian term for Pharaoh, which was “N-g-r” (God). This term then was used to refer to all Blacks and as time went by, the word N-g-r became Niger. In Fact, the Romans also classified their Emperors as “Gods,” to follow the Egyptian style. Moreover, as the History Channel poointed out, “Rome was a collection of villages before the Egyptians built it up.”(paraphrased). The word “em-peror” sounds very close to the word “en-jer.” That is not a coincidental connection.””THE WORD “N-G-R” (EN-JER) AFTER IT WAS CORRUPTED BY THE EUROPEANS””Niger = (Latin or Black/African pronounced “ni-ger.”)Nero = Italian for Black Negre = French for Black Negro = Spanish for Black The English called Blacks “Moore” or “Black-a-Moore” before they began using the word “Negro” to refer to Blacks. FROM THAT WORD CAME THE RACIAL EPITHET, “NI GG..”” 
          MLK didn’t create the word negro or n-word. 

          • Observer

            Dr. King didn’t create that word. Most trolls don’t even have the intellect to troll. That’s why they should give it up. 

        • SmittyT

          There is logic in your posts, but ignore him. He’s way over the top = he’s looking for attention = trolling behavior. 

  • Torontochick

    Maybe it’s because I’m slim and conventionally attractive but I’ve never doubted that lots of white guys would find my body type attractive, hair is versatile so if you don’t think it would appeal to a majority of men just change it – it’s not that hard to do (lol), the majority of people of ALL races in America save for maybe Asian are working class without a university degree so date someone within your economic strata also not that hard to do (lol), I am constantly approached by white men even on the bus, and I find white men the MOST attractive, actually.

    How we forget sometimes that black women are not a monolith (lol).

    • reese

      I don’t doubt it either for me.  But it was just six women they taked to.

  • Kirby

    So I talk about how blacks from other parts of the world saying they are black, but not AA, like Caribbeans, Africans, and blacks in England. Now, someone claiming to be Caribbean shows up writing all types of ignorant statements.  

    SMH, don’t act like Caribbeans don’t have issues. A lot of you have color issues and a lot of men and women there skin bleach themselves. But I’m not stopping to your level talking about most Caribbeans, because I would then sound as foolish as you do. You are making your conclusions about us based on the white media. If you don’t like black Americans, don’t come to America. Stay in the Caribbean. 

    You calling MLK a puzzy. That man had more courage than you ever will. 

    • TJ

      I noticed how a Caribbean showed up after your comment. That’s why I think it’s a troll. 

  • Uncle_Rukus

    …. black women don’t date white men because white men aren’t BLACK. 

    End of discussion.

  • Jen Lamothe

    lol, not one of these things are relevant to me.

  • Smacks_hoes

    Ugh shut up!!! If you dnt like black women gtf of the blog you idiot.

  • Live_in_LDN

    This is one of stupidest articles that I have read on this site. Full of assumptions and stereotypes….a damn shame,..

  • Really??

    I’m in the just not attracted camp….really it IS just that simple. You can’t make yourself become attracted to what you aren’t. And who says the automatic answer to afri-amer men not wanting black women is for us to run to white guys as if those are the only two options.

  • This whole article was silly and not researched. Who are these women? What men did the author talk too- this is what happens when we let anything get published. It’s insulting to journalism. MN editor- can we have the name on the joker who co-signed this? This is what happens when bad writing happens to good websites. Don’t fall for this crap folks. The goal was to start a fight and everyone fell for it. 

  • Liberal elite

    This article is trash and nonsensical.  It pretty much laid out sterotypes, not facts.  Most white men are not appealing to black women.  plain and simple. 

  • U didn’t wannan add also that when u have a argument that the white man might wannan call the balck woman out of her name like the n-word…… these are some stupid reasons and as usual u always have some stupid as topics on here…..

    • Anonymous

      You mean like Terrance Howards wife?
      Oh..she also said she didn’t want any NI##ER KIDS TOO…You mean like that?

  • Chynadoll

    I am a beautiful black woman who is dating a white italian man who will confirm to anyone he on team black and will never be going back..and I believe that..even if we were to split up, the only way he’d date white is for $$$…he’d still cheat with a black sista..what they want, we already have..Most of us..have it all..we are built like that..Men want to talk trash about a black woman wearing a weave..but a white woman will go get weekly tans..butt implants or injections..hip implants breast implants..lip injections…and will wear extensions as well..we have it all already

    My boo and most of his friends choose not to Build A B*tch..they said black woman have it plus more character and soul..

    Thinking outside the box is necessary in this day and time..rather than subject yourself to sharing a nig…because there are 15 black women to every black man…do your homework and the math..and I’m hear to tell you I’m treated like a princess..and my boo is not lacking in any areas..

  • There are a number of things wrong with this so-called study and subsequent article, but I can’t be here all day so let me just hone in on one of them. About #4… That guy is CLEARLY not white, you should have used a different photo. He resembles an Indian male. (Yes, there are other men besides ‘whites’ you can consider dating if you want, not because some moron tells you that you should or should not simply based on their ethnicity.

  • Anna

    This is one of the most r