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bachelorette weave

Weave-wearers around the country clutched the ever-living crap out of their remotes –- white-knuckled and holding for dear life — when Bryan Abasolo, a man who’s still in the running to win The Bachelorette’s heart,  stuck his fingers so far up Rachel Lindsay’s weave, he damn-near discovered the secret behind her #BlackGirlMagic.

“Noooooo!” we all screamed at our TV screens – in slow motion, of course – as we writhed in discomfort.

On June 26, Rachel tweeted what we were all thinking: “Every time Bryan put his hands in my hair my weave screamed!!!”

But all I can think of is, “Girl, if y’all are going to be together ‘til ‘death do us part,’ Bryan’s going to get a lot more intimate with your hair than that!”

I’m not sure if Rachel even plans on unveiling her real hair to her hubby. But the truth is, if she intends on hiding it forever, something’s going to end up suffocating to death, whether it’s her hair withering into brittle strands or her authenticity -– her freedom of self – being repressed and stifled for eternity.

Shudder.

But I think we can all relate to Rachel in some way. Whether we’re wigged, weaved, natural, or relaxed, a good number of us have met a love interest when our hair didn’t necessarily mimic its natural state – maybe we had our ‘fro straightened that day or we had a few clip-ins in. When we’re in these situations, sometimes our insecurities get the best of us and we wonder, “He likes me now, but will he be attracted to the real me?”

Living vicariously through Rachel every Monday as she sifts through the freaks to find her fiancé, I can’t help but wonder if she asks herself the same question. As The Bachelorette men go all heart-eyes emoji over Rachel’s weave blowing angelically in the wind, doesn’t she get the heebie jeebies over the thought of revealing her real hair?

For all of you yelling at your laptops or phones saying, “It’s just hair,” I wonder how y’all would feel if you’ve been accustomed to seeing your man’s hair like this …

Only to find out that he’s been wearing a toupée the whole damn time and he really be lookin’ like this:

Mm-hm! That’s what I thought. Not “just hair” anymore, is it? We’re all visual creatures and, let’s be honest, hair plays a big role in our physical appearance. Not that you’d leave the poor guy, but you would be taken aback, wouldn’t you?

Now, I don’t know what Rachel’s got goin’ on under her weave. Who knows? She could be hiding a gorgeous head of hair.

On the other hand, if her hair looks more like this, I don’t even want to think about that nail-biting moment when she finally decides to snip off those tracks in front of her fiancé:

We all hope that if Rachel does decide to do the big “hair reveal,” it’ll be more like that touching scene in Beyond the Lights between Gugu Mbatha-Raw and Nate Parker – and not a re-enactment of this ridiculous Steve Harvey guest who ran out of the house after seeing his wife’s real hair.

In any case, whomever Rachel chooses as her husband, we’ll know it’s real when he accepts all of her – no weave and all.

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