Is Divorce Necessary If You No Longer Want To Be With Your Spouse?

May 30, 2017  |  

We’ve been talking about the breakup between Carmelo and La La Anthony for some weeks now. While he seems to want to keep the lines of communication open, liking Instagram pictures and taking her out for Mother’s Day, La La seems like she’s on her Mya ish. Moving On. She’s dressed to kill and cosigning posts that speak to their split.

And while the two are in the midst of an uncoupling, sources are telling TMZ that the two are not planning on filing for divorce anytime soon. More specifically, while the two are “definitely not getting back together,” divorce is not on the horizon.

Now, I tend to trust TMZ, but this one could be a bit of a stretch. After all, I doubt that there are too many third parties involved in their relationship drama right now. And for those that are, it’s pretty interesting that they would be running to the media with this very privileged information. (That, or  La La is intentionally leaking her own dirt to stay in the conversation.)

But let’s just pretend, for the sake of argument, that this report is true.

The idea of wanting to distance yourself from your spouse, recognizing that you’ll never get back together but not wanting to make that separation legal or permanent is both something old and new. I say that because back in the day, when our grandparents and great grandparents got tired of each other and realized that they no longer wanted to be married, they didn’t always file papers. Sometimes, a lot of times, they just moved out and started dating other people. Hell, I’m sure there were a handful of folk who even got married again.

And I say it’s something new because in this, the modern era, people, especially people in the public eye, get divorced at the drop of a dime. It’s not taboo anymore. We’re the generation that puts happiness over propriety, to both our benefit and detriment.

There are reasons why I could see these two not wanting to rush things though. Obviously, I don’t know their financial situation but we do know there is money at stake. There might be an ugly battle about how to divide up property, assets and address child custody agreements. I could certainly see both of them not wanting to involve lawyers and be tangled up in what could potentially be a hot mess. And if the stories we’ve been hearing are true, Carmelo might have already been living like a single man anyway. -__-

I do wonder if this divorce will be such an inconsequential matter if and when La La decides she wants to date again. While I’ve seen more than enough examples of people willing to date people who aren’t legally divorced; to me, there is something so unsettling about starting a new chapter with someone when the last one hasn’t been closed yet.

I know of too many examples of when the lack of official and legal documentation to support the emotional separation, has left one or both parties holding out hope for a reconciliation. Not only that, should La La’s next dating situation turn into something more serious, at what point would the divorce be something to talk about? Does it then become a rush situation? Or does La La start divorce proceedings when she feels the itch to get back out there into the dating pool.

The whole thing raises so many questions.

What do you think, if you knew you and your spouse were never going to be together romantically again, how important would it be for you to get the divorce proceedings started as soon as you know?

 

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