I really don’t have to introduce y’all to Kelly Rowland. If you’re like me, you’ve been following her career for over a decade now, close to two. And while most of us met her as the thin, chocolate, short-eventually red-haired chick in Destiny’s Child, season’s change. In addition to being a solo artist, Kelly is a wife and mother now. She’s ushering in the next crop of girl groups, starring in sitcoms and movies and most recently, she’s become a published author. Today, her first book Whoa, Baby!: A Guide for New Moms Who Feel Overwhelmed and Freaked Out (and Wonder What the #*$& Just Happened) hits bookshelves everywhere. In honor of this new release, we chatted with Kelly about the book, the surprises of motherhood and what it means to see her husband, Tim Weatherspoon, as a father.
What made you realize it was a good idea to write the book?
I actually hadn’t really thought about writing a book. I remember seeing this quote a long time ago from Toni Morrison. “If there’s a book you want to read and it hasn’t been written yet, then you must write it .” But I remember like seeing that quote a long time ago, and being like ‘Um I don’t know if I’m gonna write a book at all.’ You know people always ask about that.
And after I had my son I remember having all different questions and calling my doctor literally a million times a day, probably, asking about every single little thing. And I finally went in to see her and she said ‘You know most moms have more questions and she said all my patients have more questions about what happens after they have the baby than before. Because all these books like What to Expect When You’re Expecting and Jenny McCarthy’s Belly Laughs were two of my must have books and she said you know someone should write a book about what happens right afterwards. And I said ‘Yeah we should write that book!’ And so she and I did.
It was myself, my doctor, Dr. Tristan Bickman. We’ve had a relationship now for 15 years she’s been my doctor. She’s awesome! And Laura Moser who also helped me bring the book together as well. And I just wanted the tone of the book to feel like a girlfriend talking to another girlfriend. But to where I also brought specialists in, like Dr. Bickman. I have a physical therapist that’s attached to this book, a trainer that attached to this book, a psychotherapist that’s attached to this book, a stylist. Because yes, I was that shallow and I wanted to make sure I was cute after I had my son. You know what I mean? All those things were really, really important to me and I just wanted to express my point of view and what happened with me and be completely honest. And I’m happy that I did and I’m happy that the book is finally out and is going going to be available
How long has this process been how long have you been working on the book?
For since actually I was pregnant with Titan. Sorry, after I had Titan, my bad.
So what would you say has been the most surprising or most challenging thing about motherhood?
I think the most surprising thing for me about motherhood is the things that you learn about yourself while you think you’re just learning all these new things about the baby. You’re learning so many things about yourself and that you can handle it. You know I think that when you first have a baby you’re overwhelmed with the idea of raising this brand-new life And making sure you just don’t screw up, in all honesty. And providing this baby with so much love than they could think ever wish or ask for. But you learn so much about yourself, you learn a different way of loving, you learn a different way of communicating, you learn a different type of patience with the baby, with yourself. I remember I didn’t think I would have any. I was petrified! It was the one thing that made me nervous about motherhood was patience I didn’t think I had any!
What did you think you would be like as a mother versus what you actually are?
Oh what I thought I would be? Oh my God I thought I would be… I thought I would be really uptight, not uptight but kind of nervous. I thought I would be nervous about everything. But I actually, I remember a girlfriend of mine saying, ‘Girl, just take a deep breath and do the best you can.’ And I literally do. And I also believe in energy and once the baby can feel like you’re nervous or you’re uncomfortable about something or you’re uncertain, they take that on. And I remember thinking I don’t want to put that on my son. And of course like, I just want him to be easy-going. And that’s what I really try to adopt is like easy-going mentality like oh my got this’ even if I’m screwing it all up in that moment. But I just try to make sure I look like I got things straight.
So is your parenting style more of the type of person to try and do things on their own or are you more of a person that tries to ask for help?
Oh no, I ask for help. If I need help I’m gonna ask for it. Anything I can do on my own, I do on my own but if I need some help, I’m gonna ask for some help
So how was it seeing your husband interact with your son?
Oh my God! Umph, umph, umph! I remember the first time… there’s a video, actually, that I’m about to post on my Whoa Baby book IG. Where my husband is dancing with Titan and he’s only like a couple days old, and he’s dancing…what is he dancing to? One of Jay’s songs, but he dancing to one of Jay’s records, and he’s just like looking at Titan and kissing him and hugging him and just like ‘Oh my God, I can’t believe you’re mine.’ I was like ‘Oh we can make another one right now’. It’s just so attractive. He’s just such a great dad. And I prayed and asked God for that. I prayed and asked God to send me a great husband I prayed and asked God to send me a great dad for my children. And that’s what I got. Everyday, I thank God for him because Titan is a happy kid and he loves dad and looks up to him and it’s just a beautiful thing to watch.
Whoa, Baby!: A Guide for New Moms Who Feel Overwhelmed and Freaked Out (and Wonder What the #*$& Just Happened) is available everywhere TODAY, including Amazon, Barnes and Noble, iBooks, Books a Million and more.