Things You’ve Done That You Hope Your Daughter Never Does

April 12, 2017  |  
9 of 13 mother giving her girl little horse ride

When you’re in your teens, twenties, and even thirties, you base your decisions off of a few questions. Those questions could sound like “Will this make me happy right now?”, “Will this make me money right now?”, “Does this make me brave?”, “Does this make me unique?”, “Will I ever have the chance to do this again?” But there is one question that doesn’t cross your mind and that’s this: “Would I want my own daughter to do this?” You may think, “Would my mom want me to do this?” and the answer (No!) just drives you to do it even more! But once you’re in her shoes, expecting a child, or already with several daughters, you may really wish you hadn’t done some things. Why? Because when you tell your daughter she can’t do them, and she asks, “Well, did you do it?” you have to say you did…Here are things you’ve done you hope your daughter never does.


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Get a tattoo before she’s 30

You have a few, and while you don’t hate them, you have grown so much since getting them and if you had to decide today whether or not to get them, you wouldn’t. Nobody really knows who they are before they’re 30, so you don’t want your daughter permanently altering her body before that age.




Get naked anywhere

A nudist colony, a beach in Europe, a co-op in Berkley…you really don’t want your daughter to get naked anywhere outside of her bedroom. That being said, you stripped naked at several parties back in your day.






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Work odd jobs

You delivered pizza (and some elicit substances) when you were younger. You delivered them at all hours of the night to all sorts of addresses. It was good money! But you will lock your daughter in her room before she does that.





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Be a cocktail server

You remember how fun and exciting it was—using your looks and charm to get hundreds of dollars in tips each night. But when you think of your daughter doing that, you just think of men groping her.







Try drugs

You did drugs in the warm embrace of friends you trusted but if your daughter tried to convince you that’s how she was going to do them, that wouldn’t make you feel any better about it.







Go broke traveling

The best thing you ever did for yourself was pinch pennies so you could travel, but if your daughter says she wants to spend her entire savings on backpacking around Europe with no plan for making money after that—nuh-uh.






Date a bunch of people to find the one

You had to kiss a lot of frogs before finding your perfect person but you also know the emotional roller coaster you put your family through. Every holiday, you brought home somebody new. Your parents would grow to love him, and then they’d be just as heartbroken as you were when you left him.

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Quit a job impulsively

You once quit a job impulsively. It just hit you one day that you weren’t pursuing your real dreams, and you wanted to be brave and not settle! So you quit! With no plan! It was invigorating. But your daughter has another thing coming if she does that and expects you to be excited for her — or pay her bills.






Obsess about weight

You wish you hadn’t spent so many years trying weird diets and stepping on the scale each day and allowing your weight to determine how you felt about yourself. You certainly hope your daughter doesn’t do that.







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Fail to stand up for herself

You remember all of the times you didn’t speak up because you were afraid people would call you too sensitive. You want your daughter to always speak her mind.




Send naked pics

Just about every boyfriend you’ve ever had has nude pictures of you. Man, you sure wish that wasn’t the case! And you don’t want your daughter sending nude pictures anywhere.








Idolize material things

There are so many things you wish you could return and, instead, have the thousands of dollars you spent on them. You know your daughter would rather put a down payment on a house in ten years than have some funky furniture and art now.





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Burn bridges

You’ve burnt some bridges in your life, and damn did it feel good at the time. But, sometimes you really wish you could reach out to those people again. You hope your daughter isn’t as impulsive as you were.

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