The Relationship Lesson Behind Toni Braxton Singing Happy Birthday To Birdman As He Smokes A Blunt

February 20, 2017  |  

Toni Braxton and Birdman

Have you ever clicked on a video expecting it to leave you thinking, “that was cute,” and instead you feel second-hand embarrassment? That’s the sentiment I was left with after witnessing Toni Braxton sing Happy Birthday to Bryan, aka Birdman, aka her boyfriend — or something like that — at the House of Blues birthday celebration she hosted for him in New Orleans yesterday.

I’ll let you watch the video before I insert too much more of my opinion into the experience.

So let’s start with the positives. Tony’s body looks incredible and that sultry execution of the birthday song puts Marilyn Monroe’s infamous rendition to shame. However, it’s Birdman’s reaction to Toni’s gesture that I find most shameful in all of this. In addition to nearly blowing blunt smoke in her face when he finally came out on stage, that side hug he offered as she flung her arms around his neck and later pulled him in for a kiss that only managed to land on his cheek display all the signs of a woman trying to secure the love and affection of a man who simply doesn’t give a damn.

This is no shade to Toni; I’ve been there. Perhaps that’s why it was so easy for me to identify said behavior when watching this video — not that Birdman’s body language was exactly subtle. And while there’s a time and a place for arguments about different love languages and varying philosophies on public displays of affection, if a man can’t muster up enough emotion to show you he at least appreciates your attempt at making him feel special, especially in a very grand and public way, he’s not worth an ounce of your time — or your body.

It’s not enough to say a man who displays this type of behavior is romantically disinterested, but I will just in case someone out there is trying to give all the ignorant Birdmans of the world the benefit of the doubt. I’ll also state as much in case anyone out there is confusing sex with romantic interest. My spidey senses tell me sex is what has Toni out here hosting birthday parties for a man who would essentially sh-t on her gift by surrounding the singer in second-hand smoke as she excitedly commemorates his thug life. And sex, my friends, is not an automatic path to love. But we don’t even have to get that deep. The bottom line here is there’s a lack of common human decency, also known as gratitude in instances such as this, that make men like Birdman not just the worst objects of a woman’s affection, but the type of dudes you don’t need to be around at all.

I’ve seen friends get more excited over gifts from one another than Birdman did over the alleged lady in his life. Perhaps, from his perspective, their relationship isn’t as serious as Toni (or the media) has made it out to be, and if that’s so it’s even more sad that she’d publicly play herself like that. And that he, as someone in her life in some capacity, would let the appearance of playage be so evident. But considering all he had to say about her hosted event on Instagram was “pull up,” I have a feeling deep down Toni knows the type of character she’s dealing with and if she chooses to keep engaging him in this way, well, then the onus is on her.

I don’t believe in tit for tat relationship tallies but a good general rule to follow is you should never go out of your way to do something for someone who won’t appreciate it. At least I can say there is one good thing that came out of this Birdman birthday serenade and that’s that not so friendly reminder.

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