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Some women in their twenties and thirties genuinely do not know if they want to have children. It’s not uncommon to find plenty of happy moms, with several children, who tell you that ten years ago, they never thought they’d be parents. And here they are with a child attached to every appendage. Your own parents (who desperately want to be grandparents) will reference those women when you tell them that you don’t want children. “That’s what they all say,” they’ll insist. But nah—you know. It’s not a matter of being cut out for it, of being responsible enough for it, or nurturing enough. It has nothing to do with your ability to love and care for another human. You have plenty of loving relationships. But some women just don’t want children, and they mean it (okay, doubters?) Here are 15 signs kids just aren’t for you.

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