The Supporting Cast in Your Marriage

September 12, 2011  |  

Marriage is a journey of ups and downs, from trivial newlywed spats to the seven-year these-kids-are-crazy-what-the-heck-happened-to-my-life itch. Those who manage to make it over the mountains and through the valleys tend to do so because they have a solid supporting cast.

Guaranteed, your husband will get on your nerves. He will disappoint you. And, you’ll probably go to bed angry once, twice or thrice. He’s human; you’re human. There are instances when it takes a third-party to be the voice of reason or give you that spark of encouragement.

Ideally your family and close friends should be your biggest set of cheerleaders, with Mom and Dad leading the pack by example. However, for various reasons, that’s not always the case. Friends and family members are often the harshest of critics and can bring more harm than good to relationships. Mama doesn’t always know best. Sometimes she’s lonely, heartbroken and jealous. Some fathers won’t ever be ready to let go. And, your Christina Milian look-a-like bestie who has always gotten more male attention may be upset she wasn’t first to get a ring on it. That’s why, when it comes to who’s pouring into your love life, you have to be discerning.

Outside influences can make or break marriages. People who want you to succeed will be there to provide honest feedback and encourage and support. Others will spew venom and piggy-back off of every negative thing you’ve ever said about your spouse. Beware of yes-men, because every argument has two sides. Anyone who agrees with you 100 percent of the time and has lots of negative bits to contribute is bad for the venture.
What makes someone a quality cast member?

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