Why It’s Harder To Spend Time Together When You Live Together
A lot of people make the mistake of believing that living together with your partner means you’ll get to spend more time together. And hey–you’re probably moving in together because you want to spend more time together. You go out of your way to see each other, fighting traffic, searching for parking, and getting up earlier than you have to (since he lives far from your office) just to share precious hours together. Moving in together seems like the perfect way to eliminate some of that headache. But, when you live together, you can start to take for granted that you’ll see your partner all of the time, and make little changes that make you wake up thinking, “I never see my boo!” If you’re not aware of some of the pitfalls that can mean less time with your partner once you live together, then you can become passing ships in the night.
You say yes to more social stuff
Because you know you can count on seeing each other at home, you say yes to every social engagement and end up having totally separate social lives.
You don’t hang in the same room
You fall into the mentality “We are hanging out” because you’re under the same roof, but you hang out in separate rooms and just check in on each other every so often.
You do your chores together
When you lived separately, you made a point to do your chores before the other person came over. Now you do them at the same time, and it eats into quality time.
You just get up later to get ready
You used to arrive at your partner’s spot ready to take on the night. Now you’re getting ready time eats into hangout time.
One of you sleeps in
When you slept at his place, you sort of had to wake up when he did. So you would have breakfast together and a morning ritual. But now, whoever has a later wake up time will just sleep in and miss morning time with their partner.
You don’t plan meals together
You both have groceries in the fridge so you don’t need to wait for each other to eat, the way you used to when you would meet up for a meal.
Your laptop is always there
Both of your laptops are always right there, which means work life creeps into your personal life a lot.
You host girls night
You host girls night thinking it means you get to see your partner sooner–you’re already home after all. But it actually means you can’t leave until the last person does. No bailing early to see your honey.
Sunday brunch becomes errands
You used to get up early Sunday to do laundry and run errands before spending the afternoon with your partner. Now you spend the whole day grocery shopping together, instead of doing something fun.
You plan more trips without each other
Since you live together, you think you can dedicate more of your vacation time to friends. But trips are some of the last forms of quality time you can have with your partner.
You workout whenever you want
You used to meet up to run on the beach or the stairs at the local stadium. Now, you always have your workout gear right there and don’t have the patience to wait for your partner to finish what he is doing to go workout.
You take your mom’s calls at home
Remember when if you were with your man and your mom called (for another one hour catch up) you would say you were busy and call her back later? Now you take her calls and there goes hangout time with your partner.
You don’t go to bed at the same time
It’s so tempting to just stay up late rather than go to bed with your partner–it’s your home and you don’t want to go to bed. But you miss quality bonding time.
You stay in, in separate rooms
You don’t go out as much because you don’t feel the need to. Why go to a restaurant when you have a kitchen? But then you end up doing your own thing at home, separate.
You don’t have to watch the same movie
You don’t have to watch what he wants to watch. You’re not stuck at his place with one TV. If you can’t agree on a movie (which you never can), you go watch separate ones.