How Important Was It For You To Be And Feel Sexy During Your Pregnancy?

March 24, 2016  |  



When my sister was expecting her first child, and we were preparing for her baby shower a few years ago, she pulled out a few options for dresses and laid them out on my mother’s bed. There my mother and I stood, waiting to see what she had in mind. One option was a very loose dress that would leave her entire back exposed, and the other, a tight dress in a burnt orange with some glittery heels and big baubles. It was definitely my sister’s style. But not my mom’s. My mother didn’t think the looks were proper.

“I don’t know why women like to wear tight clothing to have so much attention on their stomach,” she said. “This isn’t the time to really dress the way you always do and try to be overly sexy. That’s not what this time of your life is about.”

And yet, more and more women are opting against sitting back, covered up, waiting for nine months to pass so they can have their child and carry on. Many are carrying their children and going to all sorts of lengths to feel sexy during a time where everyone else thinks they need to focus on being nurturing and all that motherly jazz. Like pro pole dancer Jill MacLean, a.k.a., “Cleo the Hurricane,” who after feeling “uncharacteristically unattractive” (according to Cosmopolitan) while approaching her due date, decided to get back on the pole and bust a few splits to find a way back to feeling like her old self again. MacLean, of course, went viral:

And in response to people who may be critical of her dance moves and her choice to do them in sky-high heels while pregnant (heels she says she actually feels more comfortable in than her bare feet), MacLean said, “It is very apparent that some people think that a pregnant woman on a pole is disrespectful to their body and to their baby. Yes, what I do is still considered ‘taboo’ to some people who don’t know any better, but to me, it is strength and my passion and that is all that matters.”

And then there have been famous women like Tiny, who recently shared a sexy maternity photo she took with husband T.I.:


And after revealing that she was expecting her second child, Draya Michele wasn’t afraid to show a vulnerable, yet sexy side of herself as she showed off her stomach:

And then there are countless advice articles from different publications, including Parents magazine, on how to remain sexy during pregnancy for the sake of your relationship, and how to bring it back after the baby.

And yet, there are many, like my mom, who say such ensembles, pictures and actions aren’t appropriate for a pregnant woman, and that trying to look sensuous and to get attention should be the least of a mother-to-be’s worries. It’s assumed that you can forgo exuding uber sex appeal for nine months.

But I think it’s comments like the following, which I found on a BabyCenter forum asking what were 12 things women miss during their pregnancy, that gave me a perspective on the matter I hadn’t previously thought about:

“I miss being sexy because I don’t feel that way very much.”

Like “Cleo the Hurricane,” and the ladies on that same BabyCenter forum who said they missed their stiletto heels, being told by their husbands that they’re sexy, wearing thong panties and wearing their “cute outfits,” many women like to embrace their sexy side, when they can, because their bodies, which they no longer have control over, are changing in a major way. Their feet are swelling, their pant size is increasing, and all kinds of things are happening that may make them feel less than alluring. And just as we all have a desire to turn heads from time to time, and to just feel good about ourselves, a pregnant woman is no different. And, in fact, it’s probably more important for pregnant women to go to whatever lengths they need to in order to stay happy, so they can stay healthy for their unborn child.

But every person is different. While one woman might want to stick to sweats and a floppy T-shirt, another woman might choose to go the Kim Kardashian route and wear the tightest maxi dresses, take alluring pictures, and do whatever they feel is necessary to feel not just comfortable in their skin again, but beautiful in it.

What do you think of mothers-to-be upping the sex factor during their pregnancies? How important was it to be and feel sexy during your pregnancy?

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