by Heavenly Kimes, D.D.S.
With three children, four dogs, four successful dental offices and a happy marriage of 16 years, people often ask, “How do you do it all?”
Is there such thing as daily balance? I think not. Some days, you may be all over the place. Sometimes, I’m at home thinking about the office, and sometimes I’m at the office thinking about my family. However, the balance comes in scheduling time for everything and knowing what’s most important. For me, that order is God, family, then career. Here are my tips to carving out a little balance in your life.
Each day, I try to get up early, before everyone else, to meditate for at least 15 minutes. This is how I clear my mind to prepare for the activities of the day. Like most families, our mornings are very hectic, so I really need this time. Most days, my husband takes the kids to their bus stop because it’s on the way to his office. I find it quite difficult to get three kids on the same agenda in the morning, but we make it work. Consider the ways in which you can make your mornings less stressful.
Make Your Career Work for You
I’ve been blessed to have a wonderful staff. I’m able to schedule my hours to work two half-days a week (9 a.m. to 2 p.m.), so I can be home when my kids leave and return from school. I am able to handle many of my tasks at home. Career balancing is extremely important to me as a business woman with seven businesses, especially when I teach all-day seminars to business owners for my “Dr. Heavenly’s University.” Planning, organizing and scheduling my life must be synchronized to perfection, and I make sure that my entire family is covered in advance. Is there leeway in your business or career to make adjustments like this?
It Takes a Good Partner
I’ve also been blessed to have a husband who thinks the way that I do. Many men believe a woman’s place is at home. They saw their mothers at home when they came from school and their mother took care of the family; that was her “job.” My personal belief is a man ought to work; I would not feel comfortable with my husband staying at home while I go to work.
All women fall on different ends of the spectrum as it pertains to staying at home or working full time. Both decisions are OK as long as the kids are in a nurturing environment.
Your spouse should be like-minded and share your work ethic for true balance. Although my husband and I share the responsibility of taking care of our kids, I consider myself most responsible for the nurturing of our children, as only a mother can do, and he is ultimately responsible for the safety and the financial security of our family. Take a moment to think about what works best for you and your partner.
Schedule Your Breaks and Stick to Them
Every three months, I’ll take a week off to spend time with my family. I know not everyone will be able to do this, but it’s important to schedule vacation time or extended breaks. I also make time in my schedule just to be silent and think. It’s very necessary. How many vacations can you allot each year?
Plan. List. Do.
I’m able to be very productive because I make a list of my duties every night for the following day. It really gives me a sense of organization. It’s the best time to plan because I can think about the best way to approach my tasks before I fall asleep. I don’t put too much on my schedule; I don’t like to get overwhelmed. I’m big on delegating tasks that save me time. We pay someone to clean and wash the clothes because neither of us likes to do that. Are there any tasks that you can delegate?
Squeeze in Romance
It’s the little things that matter. Live in the moment. Carve out special times. Even after 16 years of marriage, we squeeze in our romantic time. After work, my husband and I both lie in the bed, cuddle and sometimes talk until we drift off to sleep. It is our special time. I love it when he’s excited about his endeavors. Where can you squeeze in a little romance?
My absolute top tip for successful moms is to do what works best for you and your family—and what makes you happy!
Reprinted with permission from Black Health Matters.