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This article caused such a buzz when it debuted because it’s so relatable to parents, especially moms and dads who often turn down invites from friends. Patrice who writes the DJNDevin Blog allowed us to share her funny (and oh so true) list of reasons she and her husband probably won’t make it out the house to attend most events. Enjoy!


Over the past weekend, we unfortunately missed at least two pretty important celebrations of life events for some of our closest friends (and thankfully they are the type of people who understood the reasoning for our absence, and they’re ok…everybody isn’t though). These were occasions that we were actually invited to, RSVPd for, and expected to attend. Then a little thing called life happened, and our fun-filled weekend was replaced with a killer sinus headache, an exhausted Mommy, a sneezing/stuffy Daddy, trying to get a car battery replaced, a coloring book marathon with my four-year old, and a massive poop explosion from the 11-month old tyrant! So I decided to turn this experience into a special FYI for the world to be informed about. It is necessary and we’re probably not the only family that needs to share this heart-felt disclaimer.

Here it is! 6 Reasons My Husband and I Probably Won’t Make Your Event, And Why We Don’t Want You To Take It Personally…

  1. We Have Kids I know. I know. This one is too easy and a lot of people are tired of hearing it. However, I feel like most Need to! Especially those who do Not have kids. While we still love you, we also need you to know that you have noO idea the strange ish that randomly occurs in a household with children. A temperature that’s two degrees over the norm, or a baby whining because of a missed nap can dramatically curve Mommy and Daddy’s care about meeting up for drinks and chatter.
  2. We Are Tired Like, not normal tired. The type of unbearable exhaustion where you fall asleep on the toilet and sneakily nod off while your child is reading “Corduroy” to you for the 678,467th time today. Please understand that all of that great intention we had to make it to your housewarming just got flushed down the toilet as soon as we sat down in one spot.
  3. We Don’t Have A Babysitter Contrary to popular belief and practices, there are seriously only like two people in the Entire Universe, outside of ourselves, that we will allow to keep our children! Yes, we continuously crack jokes about how people can “come and get them” but ummmm, not so much. If those two individuals aren’t available, we will All stay at home! Period. There is NO outing serious enough to hound somebody to watch our children, or sacrifice their safety Just to say we attended the hottest night out of the year. Fail! That’s why we both went to college and had a whole lot of fun and got that all out of our systems! We don’t feel guilty or as if we’re missing out on anything. Sorry, but Not sorry.
  4. If One Of Us Can’t Attend, Nine Times Out Of 10, Neither Of Us Will Attend This is a hard one for people to understand, and we’ve lost friendships over the concept. We are married. We are not pals, boyfriend and girlfriend or side buddies. We are a union. A team. We make our appearances together in the situations that call for it. This isn’t really negotiable. If hubby is sick and shut in, so am I, and vice versa. Of course this doesn’t apply to the token Girl’s or Guy’s Night Out. We respect each other’s individualized socialization. I’m referring to the things we are both hoped to be in attendance for. This also applies to situations where one spouse may think/know that the crowd at a certain event is questionable. Again, nothing personal against you, but we choose not to put ourselves in awkward or obviously drama-filled situations when we don’t have to.
  5. We Actually Do Have A Financial Budget And Priorities Not to rain on the parade of your $100/meal dinner party, but this week’s automatic tuition debiting from the Chase account, and the Costco diaper/wipe stock-up will probably hold a higher level of importance for us. I can cook you a fabulous meal, serve you a wonderful glass of wine, play some classic jazz tunes, and indulge you in the ambiance of my own darn home. All for under $200. We still love you though.
  6. We Just Don’t Want To Go Yep, it sounds rude as hell, a bit pretentious, and will probably cause our invites to dwindle in the near future, but it’s honest. The very few times that we actually get to be alone, we just want to enjoy each otherWe still do enjoy each other and we aren’t going to apologize for that. Sometimes we even just want to be left alone as a family with our boys and just relax.

Now all of this isn’t to say that we don’t like you, are trying to purposely be douche bags, or ‘unsupportive,’ but we are humans. We want people to overstand that. We love and appreciate all of friends and family, but guess what?? We come first and we don’t want you to take that personal.


Check out more from the DJ N Devin Blog here.

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