Demetria McKinney Talks Love, Touring With R. Kelly And Motherhood
There are some people who wait for opportunities to fall at their feet and others who work hard, stay focused and pave the way towards their passion. Demetria McKinney is definitely the latter. She is a budding actress (House of Payne), reality TV star (The Real Housewives of Atlanta), singer, and a mom who isn’t letting anything stand in the way of her dreams. She took time out to tell us why she enjoys motherhood so much, to talk about new projects, and to give her thoughts on marriage and love.
Mommynoire: Tell me about some of the projects you are working on. I heard you are working on an album, is that true?
Demetria: Yes, the album is called Officially Yours and it has some amazing R&B music on there. Definitely grown, definitely sexy, and still very in touch with femininity and what that means for me, anyway. Kandi Burruss is the executive producer on it and I’m super excited. We have an upcoming single as well as a single I have coming out with Lyfe which is called “Talking About Love” and that will be out shortly. And the touring has been phenomenal. R. Kelly has treated me like an equal which is something that I did not imagine. I didn’t expect him to be a dictator or mean or crazy, but I didn’t expect the love that I’ve gotten. He’s now asked me to be his official opener. It’s been a lot of fun.
Are you still acting?
Demetria: I am, I have two movies coming out. One is called “Let The Church Say Amen.” It stars Naturi Naughton and Hosea Chanchez. It’s really good, faith-based content. And then I have another one called “Sons 2 The Grave” and it will be out later on this year. And I just shot another pilot with myself, Essence Atkins, Vivica A. Fox, Tony Rock, Carl Payne and Lamman Rucker. Now this is something that people haven’t really seen me in. It’s grown and it’s a bit more adult than what people have seen me do, and tells the story from the parent’s view.
That sounds awesome. Speaking of parents and family tell me what you love the most about motherhood.
I have an almost 17-year-old. What I love the most about motherhood is that, at least up to this point, we are still just as loving of each other as we were from day one. He’s protective of me and still loves me when I’m having a good day…a bad day…in any situation. I’ve had a cheerleader and I’ve had a reason to push forward whether I felt like it or not. He’s my godsend and I think that’s the most beautiful and scary thing about parenting. You know you want to do it right because you only get one shot at this thing but he has let me know that I’m doing a good job and that’s good enough for me.
How do you balance raising a teenage son with such a busy career?
Well, I’ve been a big communicator forever and I taught him that so just like any other relationship if you communicate what you need where you are, and where you’re at, then people can’t really get too mad about what has to happen. When I’m out and he needs mom, he calls mom and mom comes home and he’s very vocal about that. He keeps a watchful eye on my calendar to see what I have coming up so we can plan accordingly. We still plan date days where I can take him out and teach him how to treat a woman. I try my best to be as open to what he has to say… as long as it’s respectful.
With all that’s going on with police brutality and how Black men and women are being treated, how have you prepared him? Have you had the “police” talk with him?
We’ve had so many of these conversations…way more than I anticipated having in my lifetime as a mother. I don’t think he’s ever prepared for it because I know I’m not. Now it’s gotten to the point where he’s keeping a watchful eye on what the headlines are saying and what’s going on in the country and he’s watching what he does. He no longer wears the hoodies or loiters in places. Normally he likes to skateboard and he and his friends would find a little spot to chill and wouldn’t be bothering anybody but you have to understand that sometimes being where you don’t necessarily have to be can lead to a situation you don’t want to be in.
I’m still old-school, and yes I was a mom relatively young, but I still believe in being in before the street lights come on.
At the end of the day we all have to stick together and we all have to make the changes and it has to happen within our community so that others can respect it and fall in line with that. But I always let him know that as an African-American man you are a statistic that you have to beat.
What are your thoughts on marriage and having more kids in the future?
I’ve been in a the relationship with Roger Bobb off and on for nine years and I’ve been in love with this man and if he were to propose to me with a Cheerio, as I said before, the answer would be yes. Now after all this time I better get a nice sized rock (laughs). I would be willing to marry this man. Now more kids, no, I’m cool on that. I haven’t had a kid…a baby in a decade and a half an that’s a long time away to start over. And everything is going with the career and all of that stuff so, you know, I’m content. He has his daughter and I have my son. I feel like I got the package that I wanted.
What are your thoughts on women proposing?
I think ‘to each his own.’ I think we are now in a situation where women have taken a lot of the lead, but for me personally I feel like if we don’t let a man be a man in certain places then we run the risk of never getting that family unit back. When the woman is fully the one wearing the pants, there’s no room left for the man. If he’s gonna be the man, let him be the man and that’s just for me.
Would you do a big wedding or have something simple?
You know, at first I thought I would have a small, little simple wedding. But with everybody having something to say–especially when you’re in the public eye and everybody has seen your ups and downs and everybody has an opinion–I’m gonna give them something cute to look at…