Moms, do you bring home a bigger salary than your man? If you do – is he bothered by that? Do you get the feeling like he’s hating on your hustle because you are the primary breadwinner within your house? Do know – for many men, a woman with a bigger paycheck can play with a man’s ego, and because of that, men often run away from women who appear to be strong, independent, educated, and financially set. Most men have been raised and taught that they should be the sole provider of their household. But we all know with today’s economy that’s not happening in many cases. In fact, you have a lot of men being stay-at-home dads, but that’s another post. To tell you the truth, I don’t know why men get upset if their woman brings in most of the money. If you are moving as a team, for the greater good, then the only thing that should matter is the bottom line. I tell my fellas all the time that they shouldn’t be upset because their woman is stacking. Honestly, I feel like the more the merrier. Here is my advice on that scenario, if you and your partner are in a committed relationship and are living together, or in some cases separately, come up with a financial game plan so you both can win. No need to run from that – unless you don’t have a vision of how good things could be if you blend your funds. If the woman got a good job, ask her about her come up and for communications sake, ask her to show you the road map to success. You know what I’ve learned after falling on hard times, and during some of those broke days – if you have a woman who is financially stable, if you ever fall on hard times again, she can and often will hold you down until you get your feet back on solid ground. For instance, I run a few businesses, so when dating, its important for me, at this stage, to find a woman who can bring something to the table, so we can build a stronger family unit. Running a business demands a lot of my money, so it doesn’t make sense for me to deal with a woman who isn’t thinking about the bigger picture, or be able to help us overall. If she makes more while I’m laying down the foundation – we can do more together. Think multiple vacations in one year:)
Sometimes, the imbalance in salaries is due to job choices. Fellas, if you date a doctor and you are a blue collar worker on a bus route, of course her check is going to be a lot more, come payday. The drama only unfolds, if she, the breadwinner is throwing her salary in your face, while belittling you. At the end of the day, a woman will still respect you as a man, if you are on your job, all across the board. You better believe a real woman knows and respects her position as a girl friend or wife. As men, we may not always make more, but a woman doesn’t want to run around doing our manly duties.
True – dating a successful woman can be scary, but men, we shouldn’t be fearful about her income. In fact, we should be thankful we have a lady in our space who is about that life and happy to be in our world. It’s a good feeling when a woman can accept us as we are and for what we bring to a relationship. Again, forget being fearful. Embrace your fly chick who is financially straight. It’s actually a come up. With her participating she can help you in so many ways, for instance, she may help you navigate a business opportunity that you are trying to venture into – that she has experience in.
In summary, don’t miss out on a good woman because she makes good money. If you are bothered by that – check your pride. You could be all she needs. Be who you are and trust me, a woman will love you as a six-figure man or 35K salary man. Real love isn’t always about the money. Stay a humble and remember don’t run from a financially strong, beautiful, and educated woman who is interested in you and what you stand for.
Randy Ritchwood: Are You The Real Breadwinner In Your House?
Randy ‘Wood’ Ritchwood is an East Orange, New Jersey resident and a divorced father of 4. He is also a serial businessman, restaurant owner, real estate owner, and the former reality star of ‘I Love New York.”Wood’ as he is often addressed, is also the 2005 winner of Oxygen’s show ‘Mr. Romance.’ To spice up Mommynoire from a man’s perspective, he will be contributing a weekly column targeting sex, intimacy, dating, marriage, baby mamas, and divorce challenges. In his eyes: “Remember, I’m not your doctor, I’m not your therapist, I’m just your man ‘Wood’ Randy Ritchwood. Follow ‘Wood’ on Instagram @randywoodritchwood