Dating, relationships and love will always be a hot topic because they make the world go around, but few are willing to be REAL about their wants and needs. Sure, we’ll admit when we want sex and we’ll even brag about how great our man is in bed, but we often fail to look beyond that and recognize what’s in front of us. Sex is not hard to come by, but a lasting relationship is, and as long as we’re confusing sleeping together with being in a relationship we’re going to be on the outside looking in on love.
One of the biggest mistakes women can make in dating is creating a false reality and believing in the butterflies and fairytale relationships. Sure love is a beautiful thing and an amazing experience to share, but it’s not all fun and games, and it surely isn’t easy. We have to be real with ourselves one and for all and understand that because he’s f*cking you doesn’t necessarily mean he’s feeling you.
I want to encourage you to check yourself before reality checks you. Here are five ways to avoid heartbreak and disappointment by simply being real with yourself:
Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear
This saying is BEYOND true. As women, we often lead with our emotions versus our intelligence and that can be problematic. When a man shows you who he is and what he wants, believe him. Sometimes a man will even tell you he isn’t interested in a relationship and you still won’t believe him. Even if you have dynamite in your drawers, there’s nothing you can do to keep a man who doesn’t want to be kept.
When “something” tells you, listen
That women’s intuition is priceless and the more you use it, the more you can learn to trust and rely on it. When you get that gut feeling that tells you that something isn’t right, don’t ignore it. 95 percent of the time when something goes wrong, you already knew it was going to happen. If you have a sneaking suspicion that someone is up to no good, being deceitful or has bad intentions for you tune in and take that into consideration. Don’t make excuses because you want so badly for something to work. If it isn’t meant for you, there’s nothing you can do to keep it. So, you might as well get rid of it sooner than later.
Investigate your intentions..what are you really looking for?
Another major mistake women make that holds them back from love is being real about their intentions. You know in your heart of hearts whether you’re after a meaningful relationship built on a solid foundation or whether you’re looking for a quick come up, a new sex partner or someone who looks great on your arm. When you set pure intentions for something real, you are able to easily determine whether a man is worthy of your time. When you’re playing games, you’re going to attract a man who ends up playing you.
Maintain your standards
NEVER be willing to put your standards aside and settle for less than you deserve. The number one thing that you have to keep in mind is that your happiness is your priority. If your mate’s bad qualities outweigh the good, chances are you’ve lowered your standards. Be very clear about your deal breakers, what you can put up with and what you absolutely cannot and be strong enough to stick to it. There is no shame in having standards, as long as you can live up to them as well. Don’t forget, you have to meet your requirement’s requirements!
Be open minded
The truth is, most of the bad relationships we end up in are because we’re chasing the “bad boys!” Most women don’t get their hearts broken by the “bug-a-boo” who waits on them hand and foot, she calls him annoying instead. When you can learn to put the superficial standards aside and focus on what really matters, you will begin attracting men whose spirit is attractive to you. Your man may not be at all like what you pictured in your head, but he may be everything you need to heal your heart.
There is a perfect love waiting for you, if you can be real with yourself long enough to recognize it.