Philadelphia Parent Tries to Get His Son Some via Craigslist

July 19, 2013  |  

It’s normal for a parent to be worried about a son about to go to college, especially when it comes to sex. With a room of his own, alcohol, and plenty of opportunity? Yeah, it’s a little scary to think about your baby running wild. One parent  in Philadelphia has the exact opposite concern, though. He (or she) is terrified of letting his smart, “handsome and extremely fit” son go off to his freshman year at Harvard before losing his virginity.

While other parents are picking out linens at Ikea, this person is desperately seeking a “sugar baby” to release the little man from the horrible burden of his V-card, says The Daily Dot:

“This is going to sound strange but my son is a senior in high school and I want to help him. He’s 18 and will go away to Harvard in the fall. He’s extremely smart but socially awkward, has never had a girlfriend and I’m sure he’s a virgin. I want to find a cute young girl to date him and turn him from high school nerd to cool college kid. He’s very handsome and extremely fit, he’s on the varsity cross country team so I’d say there’s almost zero body fat on him. You need to be 19 or under as 20+ would probably freak him out. LOL.”

No, what would freak him out is knowing his mother or father is so worried about his stuff, he’s trying to find random girls for him. Unfortunately, it gets worse. He plans to plant the selected sugar baby at a concert so that she’ll accidentally meet and fall for the son:

“Ask him to take you somewhere after and ditch your friends. Then you seduce him and take his virginity. Keep dating him (and showing him different sex positions) til he goes to college and then let him go gently so he’ll have the confidence to date other girls once he’s there. In return I’ll make your financial issues disappear. :)”

This parent’s heart is in the right place (I think) but it’s still foul. And damaging to the boy. And illegal (offering to pay someone for sex, especially someone under 18? Come on.). This is helicopter parenting at its nastiest. Your son did the work of getting into Harvard, where he’ll probably meet plenty of awkward people, and he can probably take it from there. Some of those awkward people may even want to sleep with him, but it’s up to him to make that decision.

This disturbing posting sends the message that sex is just something to be checked off a list, not an action with very real consequences. There are enough people in this world who don’t care about the emotional or physical impact of sex; why create another one? And I would pet my whole paycheck this parent would never write the same ad for a daughter heading off to college. Good luck to that boy. Although maybe he’s already gotten luck–the ad’s no longer on Craigslist.

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