Why make your relationship sanctified in the eyes of the law and God when you can keep it going for years and years as a glorified boyfriend or girlfriend?
Swap out a marriage license for a love contract detailing clauses – not vows – and if both parties “agree,” then voila! You have entered a contractual relationship agreement.
Or essentially, marriage with much less effort.
Diddy’s latest admission during a promo run at Andy Cohen’s Watch What Happens Live! of still not having a desire to get married is admirable. Think about it. We expect celebrities to skirt around personal matters when their opinions do not necessarily align with the majority. And yes, a majority of women would expect a successful, 45-year-old man to get on TV and say he’s finally ready to settle down with a good woman. But low and behold, Diddy is not. However, he is willing to put some things in writing, including financial plans and sign with his heart on the dotted line.
“I don’t know [if I’ll ever get married]. It’s the whole thing of; I think you have to be ready for it because it’s somebody else’s heart involved. That’s just a lot of responsibility and I don’t want to be going to court and having somebody interfere in my relationship. So I’d rather just do the ‘Goldie Hawn.’ But I will give a contract. I will commit to a contract, a love contract.
I’m talking about where there’s some money involved too if there’re any problems. You have to have an agreement. You can’t just love somebody, take them and y’all just part.
No honestly, I just don’t think I’m ready right now [for marriage], but I’m a great boyfriend.”
If this arrangement happens to work for Diddy and his longtime girlfriend, Cassie, then they should go for it. But I’m hoping we won’t look at this as a new trend to champion. The music mogul’s “love contract” is the 21st-century attempt at a marriage license without the City Hall trip and Say Yes To The Dress moment. All the perks of a matrimonial union without the messiness. But if Cassie would prefer to be married and have that commitment, she may be selling herself short.
I would love to see what their particular love contract details. What is written under the clause for infidelity? What happens if the riches dry up? Will his life insurance be transferable if, knock on wood, she is to become sick or vice versa? What freedoms does this love contract allow that beat traditional marriage?
What is so interesting about all of is that during Diddy’s interview with Cohen, he mentioned that in marriage, somebody else’s heart is involved. But with or without a ring, in any healthy relationship, two hearts are involved and will feel great amounts of hurt and pain if the union ends.
I am happy for Diddy and Cassie, but I won’t be looking to them for relationship goals. I’m sorry, but I refuse to believe that marriage is a thing of the past. Why not call a spade, a spade? If you’re going to go play married with all of these contracts and stipulations, why not just get married? Diddy says he may not be ready now, but it doesn’t seem like he will ever be ready if we’re being honest.
A relationship – married or not – is a love contract in its own right. And while I’m glad that Diddy and Cassie are still going strong and make their relationship work for them, I just wish people would stop skirting around commitment and celebrate love head first.