How To Be Good To Yourself

October 15, 2014  |  

“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” is what’s known best as the golden rule of life. It’s a simple rule many use as a reminder of how to treat others, and while there’s absolutely nothing wrong with giving others your best, don’t forget it’s important to be just as good to yourself.

Often people think of others first and place those needs before their own because, despite our innate selfishness as humans, it’s natural to have empathy and want to help others. Furthermore, a lot of people simply don’t know how to be good to themselves. This may sound a bit strange but it’s true. Many people’s happiness is centered around meeting the needs of others, leaving them with feelings of guilt when they think about satisfying their own needs. So what are some things you can do to break that cycle if you’re struggling to be good to yourself?

1. Start by making a short or long list of things you want to do. No matter how big or small, put anything you’ve always wanted to experience just for yourself on this list, and then start doing them! Be mindful that this is not a bucket list; it’s a live list.

2. Spend quality time with yourself. Find out what you like and don’t like, indulge in a new hobby, take yourself out to dinner, so on and so on. In order to do for yourself, you have to know who you truly are and that includes your likes and dislikes.

3. At least once a month purchase something lavish or do something out of the ordinary. Many times we tend to overlook or not purchase something we’ve always wanted because we think we can’t afford it — or we put those funds toward something for someone else. While there’s nothing wrong with giving to others from a financial stand point, there’s something to be said for treating yourself every now and then when you can afford it. Even if you have to save up for it, buy yourself something nice. You deserve it for all your hard work.

4. Take an hour once a day, at the beginning or the end, and meditate on good thoughts or inspirational quotes. Doing this will refuel your spirit to help you move forward helping others as well as helping yourself. It’s often said that what you put into your spirit will manifest itself on the outside. So if your pouring positive words into your spirit those words grow in ways that’ll you never expected or even knew you needed.

5. Take mini stay-cations! Indulging in a brief getaway for and by yourself will allow quality quiet time to gather your thoughts, read those inspirational books and simply relax and breathe.

Doing these and other positive rituals will help create a healthy balance so you won’t get burned out and will maintain your zest for giving and living. Being good to others is an essential part of a human existence, but failing to be good to yourself in the same token is not only contradictory, it’s inhumane. You can’t truly be good to others and neglect yourself. So take some time each day, week and/or month to be good to yourself so you can continue on this journey we call life with inner peace and harmony.

Liz Lampkin is the Author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin.
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