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What possesses a grown man to put a hand on a woman, could only be insanity…or bad home training. Either way, millions of women are or have been in abusive relationships. Escaping, as easy as it sometimes seems, is usually more complicated than a “Mission Impossible” movie.

“In order to leave, you have to make up your mind that you are done with the abuse. If you, in your mind, deny that you are being abused, you will never leave,” said Cayden Conor, an expert voice on eHow.

Here are some quick tips to escape or help someone escape:

1. Set up a living situation, where he’s not involved. Talk to your family member he’s never met or the friend that you’ve never introduced him to. If you have no one to temporary live with, look for an affordable lease and never let him know where the place is.

2. Inform close family and friends about what’s been going on. If other people know, they’re more apt to help you get away from him and/or contact the authorities if you can’t.

3. If there are children involved, get them out of the home! He does not need to be anywhere near your children, so feel free to file a restraining order.

4. If you decide to stay…for whatever reason (side-eye), report every time he lays a hand on you.  Police reports can be filed super discretely and are always good to have on file—in case he tries to switch up his story later on.

5. Get out of your feelings! We know you feel embarrassed that the ‘love of your life’ is beating you. We know everyone may think he’s a saint. We know he’s ‘gonna change’ someday. But at a certain point you’ll realize his feelings for you are not out of love but jealousy, greed, mistrust and self conciseness. Reflecting on all the good times you’ve had or the man you hope he will be doesn’t restore the present fact…he’s not the one.

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