Has there ever been anyone you felt in your heart and soul that was “the one who got away,” and you wish that you had the chance to do the relationship all over again, but better? Have you ever walked away from a relationship and knew you made one of the biggest mistakes of your life? Well, what if you had the chance to rekindle an old flame? Would you be apprehensive about getting back together with an ex, or would you move fast and forward, full speed ahead? Reuniting with a past love has its ups, downs, pros and cons just as starting a relationship with someone new does, but I think there are a few more advantages to rekindling an old flame that people don’t realize.
For instance, you don’t have to start from scratch when getting familiar with them because you already know quite a bit. This can be good and bad because the relationship may have ended because of the things you knew about that you didn’t like about them, but on the other hand, there are things about them you know about and love them for. It’s your choice to take them or leave them as they are, but it’s less work getting to know the ends and outs of a familiar love.
Another good thing about igniting a past romance is that the two of you can do things differently. Before you and your past lover decide to go full speed ahead, it’s best to take some time and assess the things that went wrong before, talk through them, then decide and agree together on how things should go a second time around. Try your best to stick to what’s been established so you won’t make the same mistakes.
Also, you can get to know each other on a different level. Now is the time to learn new things about your past love since you were apart. It’s also the time to get reacquainted with the things you loved about them before and learn how to adjust to the things you didn’t like so much. These are just a few good reasons to start anew with a former mate, but as always, there are always a few reasons why you should be cautious when doing anything…especially when it comes to matters of the heart.
One con in rekindling an old flame is that they may not have changed, and the issues that led to things falling apart are still there. If you’re going to get back together with someone you must keep in mind that they may or may not have grown since your last encounter and you may end up regretting going backwards.
Another con is that you may not be over the break-up, which can hinder your progress moving forward. Many times when a love affair is over a person is left with emotional, mental and sometimes, physical scars. If this is the case, it may not be a good idea to give things another try.
One other pitfall of starting over with an old flame is that things may not be better than the first time you dated, but worse. And if this is the case, head for the hills and don’t look back!
Beginning something new with a familiar person can be refreshing and stressful at the same time, but if you and your mate are willing to give things a second try then by all means, go for it. It’s like the old saying goes, if at first you don’t succeed…
Liz Lampkin is the Author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? Follow her on Twitter @Liz_Lampkin
