“I’d Rather Take A Nap”: You Know You’re Getting “Old” When…

May 29, 2014  |  
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Have you ever found yourself saying, “I must be getting old” after complaining about something that used to never cross your mind? Been there, done that, so we came up with a list of things we often find ourselves feeling old for saying or doing. Now, as always, this is all in light fun, and I don’t mean you’re really old as dirt, so please don’t take it that way. Just laugh with us at the reality that people change, and so do their tastes and interests with time.

You Start Being Critical Of How Much Skin People Younger Than You Show

Watching booty cheeks hang out of denim cut-off shorts on the streets is enough to turn your face all the way up, and the midriff baring tops of your niece and her friends just to run to the store get you worried (and those creepy compliments from her unknown Instagram followers do too). And don’t EVEN get me started on the young men with their drawls hanging out as they walk down the street…

Clubbing And Hitting Up Lounges Becomes A Chore

You find yourself thinking, Can a sista enjoy a quiet evening of catching up on  House of Cards instead of standing in lounges that are too damn loud? And sorry to your friends if standing around dancing to a song that has more curse words than content while holding on to a $10 drink doesn’t tickle your fancy. For you, if it isn’t a birthday gathering for a good girlfriend, you’ll be at the crib.

The New Music On The Radio Horrifies You

Speaking of music, do you get uncomfortable when you’re being told to “move your panties to the side” when listening to the radio? Or a little sad when what is considered rap is just straight up foolishness with a bunch of sound effects, violence and designer label references?

Anything After 10 P.M. Becomes A Problem

This is personally all me, but that’s mostly because I don’t have a car and don’t like to be on the subway too late dealing with drunk people, stale vomit, and late night fights that seem like they last forever because my train is going local. But if your evenings end early and you like it that way, you might be getting “old” with me too.

You Have Less Patience For Bull

You try to be understanding and loving in your early 20s, but as time passes, certain associates start soft-shoeing on your last damn nerve. Maybe it’s because the older you get, the less free time you have on your hands, so the less likely it is that you will want to spend said time with people who really don’t make you happy.

You Prefer To Be As Comfortable As Possible, Rather Than Trying To Be Cute

You agreed to step out for a night on the town with your friends, but you refuse to put on anything but your good flats, and you barely wanted to put on your contacts. The days of rocking stilettos for every little thing have come and gone for you, and you’d rather bust a move in comfort rather than cringing.

You Have To Look Up All The New Slang

There are new sayings and acronyms popping up everywhere every day, and since you aren’t cool enough to know why the young people are referring to your favorite Budweiser Lime-a-rita as THOT juice, you quietly visit Urban Dictionary to get some clarity on what the hell everyone is saying.

Cat Naps Are Everything

You might not get to take them as often as you would like, but when it’s the weekend or you happen to be home and could be cleaning, reading or working out, you’re snuggled up on the bed or laid out on the couch like you haven’t slept for days.

You Start Being Overdramatic About Ordinary Pains

“See, I can’t do that with you because I have achilles fasciitis in my foot, and if I walk for more than five minutes the pain will be excruciating.”

And if that’s not you, then maybe this is:

“I knew it was about to rain. You know that pain in my knee starts acting up when the weather is about to flip on us.”

Everyone Around You Is Settling Down And Having Babies, And You Noticed

There’s nothing wrong with not being part of that group of friends who seem to be tying the knot at an incredible rate, or are too ready to pop out a baby. But once it starts freaking you out or your family members give you lectures about the direction of your future every time they see you, you might be moving into a new stage in your life where you start feeling older than you really are.

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