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The Princeton mom caught a lot of flack for encouraging young women to focus on marriage alongside their studies during their college years. And while she may have been a tad off insisting Ivy League women could only be happy with Ivy League men, the basis of her argument was a smart one.

College is the only time in our lives where we are surrounded by thousands of similarly aged peers. At no other point in time are there more options based on numbers alone. It’s wise to remain open to the idea of meeting your lifelong companion there.

The post collegiate dating world isn’t as dense and, because of that, requires more intention. Relationships don’t work like fairy tales. Marriages don’t just fall into your lap. Very much like a successful career, you have to go after the marriage-material relationship you want, and it starts with being clear on who you want, what you need and setting yourself up to get it.

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