14 Signs You Might Think Too Hard
The mind is very tricky thing. In one aspect, it’s your best ally. It helps you to decipher information, remember people and facts, and helps you to logically come to conclusions with difficult issues. However, sometimes we can experience somewhat of a rearview mirror affect, seeing things closer than they actually appear, and that’s when our greatest ally can become an enemy.
Everyone has moments when they panic prematurely or think too hard about things. So here’s a list of few times to help you decipher when you’re on a metaphorical ledge.
You have premature arguments… before they even happen
I think everyone has been there once or twice. You’re anticipating an interaction with someone that you know could potentially turn negative. You start off thinking about contingency plans on if the conversation begins to go in the wrong direction. Then, you begin to think about their rebuttal, then, the next thing you know you’re getting heated. You’re looking in the mirror, saying your side, then answering as if you’re them… yeah… that conversation hasn’t even happened yet, and you’re fully emotional about it. Yep, you thought too hard, amigo.
You imagine what the person is going to say
This is a continuance of the first sign.
There’s nothing wrong with imagining to a point, but if it’s a constant thing, and you find yourself almost anxious because you “know” what they’ll say… turn the brain off.
You think that people are out to get you
Now, I’m not going to lull you into a false sense of protection, there are bad people out in the world. Horrible people. However, every single person that you come in contact with is not out to get you and only you. Like the person who cut you off while driving, it wasn’t a personal attack on you. The cashier who put your change on the counter instead of your outstretched hand, that person is rude, but probably not targeting you specifically.
You Read into Pauses
Whether it’s a comma in an email, or a slight break before answering your question, your mind will fly with “what did they mean by that?” Most of the time, it’s nothing, but to you, it’s everything.
You See Critique as Criticism
It never feels too good when someone points out our flaws and reminds us that we’re not as perfect as we think we are. Receiving critique can be extremely hard. But when you take critique as someone demeaning you then it’s a sign that you might be thinking too hard about it.
People can like you, but not an action that you do.
You think that everyone is a “hater”
Yes, you are a star, but not everyone is trying to stop your shine. You’re thinking too hard if you think that that’s everyone else’s motive when they’re dealing with you.
If a person looks at you more than once (or for more than two seconds) you read into it
I’m not even going to lie, I’ve had this happen to me:
I was at a fast food restaurant and a group of people came in and were staring at me. I looked away, but I couldn’t shake the fact that some of the people where still looking at me, and some of them started to point. Feeling extremely self-conscious my mind went to the horrible dialogue that I was sure was centered around me.
However, I just so happened to be standing in front of a new deal (2 for $5), and they were trying to figure out what to get from the poster that they so graciously asked me to move from in front of, and once I did, they didn’t look in my direction for the rest of our time there. Yep… I was thinking too hard…
You Mentally Exaggerate Relationships
Who doesn’t like to think about the possibilities of meeting new people and what they could mean in your life. But if after a first date you’re thinking about what school district to send your non-existent children to, or the very nice lady at the block party is your best friend, though you just exchanged pleasantries, you’re overly exaggerating these things.
You See things in Black and White
Seeing things in black and white seems like it’s simplifying things, but in actuality it complicates things. Undoubtedly, there are things that are cut and dry, but most things in life are shrouded in shades of gray, and it takes work to ignore these shades. See things for how they are, not for how you want to see them.
You Create Villains in your head
Everyone plays the hero in the story in their minds. The only difference from your life and those of fictional characters are due to the fact that you villainize people, but to fictional standards. People aren’t just flawed, but you see them the same way that you might see Freddy Krueger, or any other villain. There are some bad people, but most people are just like you, trying to find a way in life, while making multiple mistakes along the way.
You Live in Perpetual “What Ifs”
Living too far in the future makes you stop appreciating what’s happening in the present. If every single step you plan to take is accompanied by a “what if” it shows that you’re thinking too much.
You Focus too Much on the Past
The same way how living too much in the future is indicative of you thinking too hard, so is living in the past. The thing is, you can think about what you did wrong, and how you wish you could have changed it, but it’s not going to erase it. So, try to not think too much about it.
People Open up Conversations with You with a Disclaimer
If every single conversation someone has, they have to say: “Okay, so this isn’t related to you,” or something similar to the sorts, then it means that not only do you have a habit of thinking too much, but other people know it too and have to stop you before your mind goes wild when they talk to you.
You Try to Find the Flaws in Every Good Thing
If you find that you can’t even enjoy when something good happens, and you wrack your brain trying to find the flaws (because nothing can ever be this good without some type of downside), then just know that not only are you thinking too hard, but you’re ruining your happiness.